Book name: Gintama*
Fandom: Gintama
Genre: Satire, Parody
Author: TheEvilKoala 
POV: Third person view
Content: 37 chapters
Status: Ongoing
Remarks: "I put a lot of effort into my story and tried to avoid cliches, so I think it's a decent fanfic. I would like a review so I could improve it and retain more readers. I'd like to know if there's anything wrong with it that would cause the read count to drop."

- The Evil Koala

A) Cover - A+ (9.7)
...1) Image [ A+ ]
...2) Font [ A+ ]
...3) Color scheme [ A+ ]
...4) Resolution [ A+ ]
...5) Implicative Aspect [ A+ ]
...6) Impact [ A+ ]
...7) Meaning [ A+ ]

B) Description - A+ (10)
...1) Style [ A+ ]
...2) Relevance [ A+ ]
...3) Mysticism [ A+ ]
...4) Neatness [ A+ ]

C) Storyline - A+ (9.6)
...1) Chapter length [ A+ ]
...2) Prioritization [ A+ ]
...3) Spotlights [ A+ ]
...4) Composition/Style [ A+ ]
...5) Presence of Plotline [ A- ]
...6) Originality [ A+ ]
...7) Efficiency [ A+ ]

D) Characters - A+ (9.5)
...1) Accuracy [ A+ ]
...2) Description [ A+ ]
......a) Style
......b) Vividness
......c) Impact
......d) Originality (only OC characters)
...3) Presence [ A+ ]
......1) Scene distribution
......2) Contribution to story

E) Dialogue - A+ (9.6)
...1) Accuracy [ A+ ]
...2) Density/Weight [ A+ ]
...3) Language [ A+ ]
...4) Richness [ C+ ]
......a) Description of actions
......b) Linear to scene
......c) Creativity
...5) Length [ A+ ]
...6) Delivery [ A+ ]
...7) Neatness [ A+ ]

F) Setting - A+ (9.6)
...1) Direction [ A+ ]
...2) Number of locations [ A+ ]
...3) Vividness [ A ]
...4) Scenario [ A+ ]
...5) Names [ A+ ]
......a) Locations
......b) Characters
......c) Others

G) Technicals - A+ (9.5)
...1) Errors [ A+ ]
......a) Grammar
......b) Punctuation
......c) Typo
...2) Arrangement [ A+ ]
...3) Encapsulation of idea [ A+ ]
...4) Mood [ B+ ]
...5) Book title [ B+ ]
...6) Genre relevance and accuracy [ A+ ]

* * * * * * * *

Verdict :
Book rating: 9.6/10.0 (A+)
Potential: 10%

* * * * * * * *

A) Cover
Despite the simplicity of the cover, I have to say that it's well-suited for the book. The fact that only Okita and Kagura was on the cover was a good choice. It isn't busy, which was the part I liked best. To be honest, I don't watch Gintama and I only watched clips of scenes when I see those vids in my recommended video list in Youtube. Well, even if I don't know much of Gintama, the cover is good.

B) Description
I really liked the description! It was straight to the point, and I instantly knew that it would have some comedy in it. It wasn't really revealing either, and I believe the amount of information you let out about your book was good because a lot of people tend to reveal too much. But I guess that is sometimes necessary to get the readers interested.

But anyways, good job with the description!

C) Storyline
I actually enjoyed reading this book. Though it isn't so descriptive, which of course isn't actually need since this is supposed to be a comedy/satire. I even couldn't help but smile at certain scenes. Uh, if I saw everything as an anime I probably would have laughed a lot. My favorite scene was when I thought Okita would commit seppuku on himself, but the aliens only required his finger in the end--which again didn't actually happen. And I couldn't help but ship Kagura and Okita, I sometimes wished that they were more expressive of their feelings for each other!

The comedy really fit into the book, and I have to tell you that I didn't cringe at all. I loved the fact that you included yourself in the story line, including the fact that the characters were breaking through the fourth wall. Well, not exactly but they were aware of the fact that they were a part of a book.

The story was pretty good. It had a good share of comedy and drama, and it was really heart warming in some parts. And I liked the way the book was divided into arcs. It suits the book really well. I acknowledge the comedy of this book. It was cute, no joke.

D) Characters
As far as I am concerned, I believe everyone was portrayed well. Since I never really watched Gintama, I have no way of knowing if the characters were OOC in the first place. But, their presence and impact on the story was great! Like, maybe because of the pics you used along the chapters helped me remember the characters better.

E) Dialogue
I loved reading the dialogues! It was like actually reading through an anime's script, and I guess I really found the characters funny. I don't see any problems with the dialogue since the lengths were about the same amount, and since the book wasn't really dramatic all the more perfect.

F) Setting
The use of description adds the feel of the story, and maybe you were unconscious about it, but the way you described the setting carried the heaviness in certain scenes like when Okita stayed in his room after killing the fat ass. The amount of vividness was appropriate, I really enjoyed reading it. I won't criticize that it isn't really vivid like I would prefer, and besides the way you described was pretty good, too.

G) Technicals
There's no issue in the technicals. Hmmm, maybe you just need to work a little on the arrangement of the paragraphs. It's a little rough I mean, how you write in certain parts. I'm not so sure how I could describe it, but you should try rereading some parts and read them aloud. I think you might be identify them by the.

* * * * *

Concluding remarks:
I empathize that you want to find out why you're losing readers, but, girl, even I don't know the answer to that question because even my own stuff isn't really that popular. I had a lot of readers and supporters when I was younger and that was like 2014-2016, and after that everything just started slowing down when I decided to become more serious in writing my stories. And now, I barely have readers, but I just continue writing anyway. 

Don't think too much about it, just keep writing. I'm sure someone would read your stuff and be loyal to finish it.

Your book was really good, and I don't see a lot of people write good comedy books without making readers cringe. I, at the very least, didn't. Just keep writing and know that your book is good. Some people just get super busy with school, some stop using Wattpad, and some just change preferences like they decided to shift from anime to Korean. . . groups, bands, whatever they would call them.

I wish you the best of luck for your book! I hope more people would appreciate your book :) And I'm super sorry for reviewing your book late!

- R