"We all have bullets beneath our skin. We pray our lovers won't flinch at what they find."

―Andrea Gibson

Lin did not yelp when her boot slid in a puddle of blood. To be fair, she hadn't been expecting it. She was usually the one who caused the blood puddles. Face pulled into a hasty stoicism, Lin scanned the gold-dusted room with wide eyes.

Hadrian looked up from his book. He sat cross-legged on the ground with his back against the far wall, his left side leaning on the glass doors to the garden. She couldn't quite see which book it was, but it didn't appear to be a Library edition. He looked her up and down before speaking. "Shabina's worried."

"Well, if there was ever a time to be worried, it's now." The room's emptiness felt harsher than ever before, gold floor marred with blood and dozens of bootprints. She pulled her lips into her mouth. "Has she said anything to you? About big stuff -- war stuff."

He lifted an eyebrow. "Yep. You first, though."

"What?"

"What did you do?" Hadrian closed his book. "That's what Shabina's worried about, by the way. If we're being honest -- so am I. I told her you weren't stupid enough to go after Mara right now."

Lin blew out her cheeks, scraping her scalp with her nails before sinking down beside him. She took the book out of his hands and squinted at the cover. "What is this?"

"Watership Down. It's a classic. Violent. Well-done. Good quotes." 

"It's got rabbits on the cover."

"The main characters are rabbits." Lin smirked and peered into the first page, only to have Hadrian slide it from her grip. "Back to the actual conversation."

She scowled. "Ye of little faith. I behaved."

"Fine, you behaved. Whatever that means." 

"It means nobody died. No humans, no witches. I mean -- there was bloodshed, but that wasn't me." She closed her eyes and rocked her head back against the wall, taking a deep breath. "And what about this mess?"

"Not me." Hadrian's voice held strong and detached. "A witch came through the mirror."

She lurched forward, eyes wide on him. "What?"

"Guards took care of it."

"No -- " her pulse pounded in her skull "-- that can't happen. It's impossible."

He blinked up at her, brows furrowing slightly as she stood up. He put the book down and pulled himself up, trailing after her as she went back to the mirror. The glass itself didn't feel any different, no witch's magic floated on its surface that she could see. She flattened her hand against it, sigils bleeding through her skin.

"Wha -- Lin, what are you doing? It was probably just a fluke." 

"Hush," she hissed. 

The sigils hummed over the mirror. Their whispers rushed over each other, unintelligible as they filled her mind. Lin grimaced and pulled her hand back. The silver receded from her fingertips in fits of tingling pain. "Damn."

Hadrian's eyes flitted from her to the mirror. "Are you going to explain that or will I have to ask someone?"

"Witches can't go through mirrors." She flexed her fingers. "Greymark made it impossible."

"Evidently not."

"No -- Grey says a lot of shit, but he wouldn't lie about that. Something must've happened to the mirrors. Something's breaking them down." 

Hadrian leaned against the mirrors, daintily positioning his feet out of the blood smears. "Are you sure it isn't just this one? I mean -- it's not one of Greymark's."

Lin felt along the edges. Her skin smarted against the deadwater spots that had accumulated in the frame. "No. This isn't local. I couldn't feel it when I came through, but something's definitely messing with the network."

He shifted, glancing at the mirror like it might bite him. "Is it safe?"

"Should be. I mean -- it should hold. I have no idea, actually." She wrinkled her nose. "Either way, we need to go through soon."

He looked up, alarmed. "What?"

"Yeah. Some witch may or may not have threatened you. I want you close, especially if witches can come through mirrors. Shit." Lin raked her nails against her scalp. The Citadel wasn't safe. Not for Hadrian or Shabina or anyone else. She had to think -- she had to decide on something. 

"Which witch?" 

She grinned. He just lifted an eyebrow. "Okay, fine. I went to see Grey. I was super pissed. Killed Gerald and a few others because I was pissed. Grey was less pissed than me but still pissed enough to be a little bitch. He told me to go clean up a kill I missed a while ago, and that witch is way stronger than I thought, she kicked my ass, threatened everyone I love, then let me live. So that's where I'm at right now."

She tapped her hands against her hips, bouncing on her toes as she waited for him to answer. He blinked several times before nodding. "That's -- uh... are you okay? I mean -- she --"

Lin almost bit through her lip. "Yep. Dandy."

He nodded again, slower. "I think we should talk to Shabina."

"Why?"

"Because." 

"Because why?" Lin crossed her arms.

He tightened his mouth, glaring up at her. "Because we've been living in her house for the past two weeks and she's worried about you."

Lin snorted. "This isn't her house."

"Kind of is." He cocked his head against the mirror.

She wrinkled her nose. His eyes were soft and drowsy, all warmth and trust and humor. If she wanted to kill him right then, she doubted he'd move an inch before her knife was in his throat. That was -- wrong. Bad thought, she really shouldn't think like that. "No, we need to get back, Razo's waiting." 

His eyes flashed past her shoulder, his expression melting into a soft smirk. "Too late."

Lin spun, whipping Hadrian's face with her hair. He sputtered behind her. Far more importantly, Shabina stood in the doorway. She'd washed -- her skin shone and her dress clung to her skin. It was a nightgown, plain and off-white. Her braids were pinned up atop her head. Zeke and Kiara turned to shadows in the hallway as they ceded Shabina's safety to the hunters.

Shabina's lips twitched up to a smile before dropping hesitantly. "Hello."

"Hi. Your majesty." 

Shabina blinked and cocked her head.

Lin squeezed her eyes shut, nodding to herself. "Yeah, that sucked. Just -- ran into some folks who sort of worship you. Ish. Getting major messiah vibes."

The moment passed sluggishly and Hadrian broke the silence. He stepped over the blood puddle and patted Lin's arm as he passed with a smile. "I'll go talk to Cortez. Be back in ten minutes."

"No, Hadri --" She grabbed at him, just barely missing his arm before he stepped out of the way and left her alone with Shabina. Lin rocked back onto her heels and cleared her throat. "Okay. Hi. Again."

"We got that out of the way already," Shabina said. She folded her hands in front of her and rocked from side to side. "Garden?"

"Yeah, it's a bit --" Lin glanced down at the bloody floor "-- yeah. Garden sounds good."

Shabina's skirts stirred up the gold dust, mercifully avoiding the clumps of blood. Lin trailed after her, leaving a trail of tacky prints. 

"Are you alright?"

"Fine," Lin said. 

Shabina put her chin on her shoulder to look back at her. "You'll have to lie better if you want to fool me."

Lin twisted her mouth and nodded, falling into step beside her. The garden looked like stone in the dying light, leaves glossy and flowers still. They stopped at a drooping tree, one with large red blossoms that draped towards the floor like a willow. Shabina stepped over the little barrier that separated the pavement from the dirt.

"Uh, shouldn't --"

Shabina held up a finger. Then she hooked it around Lin's weapons belt and pulled. Lin's eyebrows went up but she followed anyway, ducking under the flowering tree's branches and letting them fall behind them like a curtain. The sunlight filtered through the thin branches, dappling Shabina's skin. Lin swallowed and looked around, anywhere but at her face.

"Great. Less bloody."

Shabina smiled briefly. "I just wanted to apologize. I shouldn't have told you about Janus like that, I had no idea --"

"It's fine."

"No, it isn't. Please let me finish." Shabina put her hand into Lin's. "I had no idea you were close with him. And even if you weren't, I should have been more respectful. And I'm sorry I couldn't protect Hadrian as well as I should have -- "

Lin hummed and grimaced, rocking to the side. Shabina gave an exasperated sigh and cut herself off. "Yes?"

"I said nothing."

"But you want to and it's bothering me."

"Yeah -- I'm not fond of the whole apology thing. Like, as a concept." Lin shrugged. "Pretty much none of those are your fault."

Shabina sighed again and closed her eyes. "You're impossible."

"I'm aware," Lin said. "And you're leading into something."

Shabina opened her eyes. "You know I want you by my side, it's why I invited you -- it's why I let you and Hadrian stay here. Hadrian has led me to believe you might be willing to enter a partnership."

A pang ran down Lin's ribs. Her mouth twisted to the side and she let go of Shabina's hand, crossing her arms over her chest instead. "What do you want exactly?"

"Is it so hard to believe I want what's best for you?"

"Yes," Lin all but snarled. "Do you want me to kill for you or have sex with you? Or both?"

Shabina blinked and leaned back. "I don't -- "

"You want me to be your personal huntress." Lin scowled. "Trust me -- you don't need it. Those people out there worship you even if they don't know your name, you've got an army at your beck and call whether you want it or not."

"What I want is to reduce casualties." Shabina's eyes flared. "I want to end the slaughter, and I don't want you to kill any more people. Stay here with me. Damn Greymark and the Kings, damn the hunters and Mara, just stay with me."

She snorted. "So you want me as one of your wives? A cute little trophy to show off how smart and diplomatic you are. Yep -- I can see it now -- "

"You don't understand!" Shabina's voice cracked the silent garden. Lin lapsed into silence, the trickle of water in the distance filling the air. Shabina swallowed and clenched her jaw, composing herself before continuing. "You can do something better than kill and bed your way through life. You're worth more -- you deserve more than a lifetime of blood and a terrible death."

Lin wanted to laugh. She wanted to cry, too, but that wasn't new. Her hand settled on the hilt of her knife, squeezing it like it was someone's hand. For once, she couldn't imagine Alekhine's reaction to this. He'd never have said anything like that. She'd never wanted him to. Wait -- no, she knew how he would react. He'd laugh. He'd laugh because Shabina had stepped straight from the trashiest fantasies that Lin skimmed when she wanted to die. He'd laughed at those, and her with him. Lin swallowed against the lump in her throat. "No."

Shabina stood frozen, eyes wide and lips parted. Tears shone in her eyes, picked out in detail by Lin's sigils. She could see every line -- every microexpression of Shabina's face -- and it all screamed honesty. It screamed devastation.

And for the life of her, Lin didn't understand why.

She swallowed again. "I need to go. My friend's waiting."

"Wait -- "

"I'll come back," Lin said. Her voice scraped low. "Just to bring Hadrian. He's not -- he doesn't actually want to be a hunter. He won't fit. Once I'm done, I'll leave him with you." Once I've killed Honora and Mara.

The quiet descended again. 

"And Mara?" Lin envied Shabina's ability to keep her voice even. 

"Haven't decided," Lin lied.

Shabina took a sharp inhale. "Is it really your decision to make?"

"Has been for a while, yeah." 

"And the people with her? Her court, her family?" Shabina's fingers tightened into her own arm. "Will you just kill them all no matter how many there are, how young they are?"

"Will you stop me?" 

She didn't answer. Shabina's shoulders tightened. 

Lin nodded and looked down. She sniffed. "Thought not. Look, just -- there's something up with the mirrors. They're not reliable anymore. Avoid Yelena's residential islands, she's got a contract with the hunters to defend them. The witches are up to something, too. I don't know what exactly, but you'll need Hadrian on your side -- I've taught him what he needs to know about witches and he's an okay fighter. That doesn't mean put him on the front lines, I still want him safe. Also -- " she bit down on her cheek with a wince " -- nevermind."

Shabina just watched her.

The scrape of boots through golden dust drew Lin's attention, though she didn't look away from Shabina's eyes. Hadrian didn't make that much noise when he walked -- but his voice whispered something she didn't understand. He was with someone.

Lin gave an exaggerated bow, her head dipping below Shabina's waist. "Good day, your majesty."

A tendon in Shabina's jaw jumped. Lin didn't bother to look her in the eye as she turned on her heel and swept the draping branches out of her way, striding back to the mirror room. 

Hadrian stood by the mirror with one of the guards. The one he'd saved from the ship -- Connor? He was taller than her and that was the extent of what she remembered of him. Connor -- wait, Kevin? -- had a machete on his hip and levelled a stare at Lin the moment he caught sight of her.

"What now?" she groaned.

Before the guard could say anything, Hadrian shushed him. "Cortez wants to come with."

Cortez. She wouldn't have gotten that in a thousand years. She looked him up and down, only distantly registering that he wasn't wearing a guard uniform. Her head hurt, her chest hurt, and she felt like she was going to either drop or cry. Or both. Maybe kill someone. She squeezed her eyes shut and nodded. "Sure. Fine. We could always use a meat shield."

A soft touch made her open her eyes again. Hadrian had sidled up to her and pinched her sleeve. She nodded again, slower this time. Later, I'll tell you later.

He seemed to understand, giving Cortez a small, tight smile. His shoulders were narrower than usual and he slouched away from Cortez when he stepped to the mirror. He didn't want Guard Clingy either. Lin was too tired to act as Hadrian's emotional bodyguard as well as physical. 

"Come on, we're already late," Lin said.