n. the desire that memory could flow backward. We take it for granted that life moves forward. But you move as a rower moves, facing backwards: you can see where you've been, but not where you're going. And your boat is steered by a younger version of you. It's hard not to wonder what life would be like facing the other way...

* * *

I feel dry tears on my cheeks as I wake up, seeing the familiar comfort of the ceiling of my room back home. The curtains just beside my bed had been parted, showcasing the sky bleed with the color of the sunset. And for a moment, I am caught with its beauty and the sadness that the game is over and the day is ending.

"(Y/N), it's finished."

I immediately turn to the direction of the voice, surprised to find Gregory inside my room, leaning heavily against the door. I brush away the dry tears and ask him, "Gregory? Bakit ka nandito sa bahay? Paano ka nakapasok? P-Paano kapag nalaman nila mama—"

He shakes his head. "'Wag ka mag-alala. Hindi nila malalaman."

I draw closer to him, slowly. "P-Paano ako nakabalik dito? Hindi naman ako kumain ng mangga... o iyon na talaga ang katapusan noon?" I shake my head. "I-Imposible... Hindi ko man lang siya nakita." I bite my lower lip, looking at him intently then. "Gregory, baka may paraan. Please! Let me return to the game." A lump of tears seem to rise in my throat. "K-Kahit iyon lang."

However, he remains firm despite my pleading. "(Y/N)... Tapos na ang Revolución Filipina."

I shake my head much more. "No, no! Game siya so pwede ko i-restart, di ba? Willing ako na ulit-ulitin yung laro mula sa simula, kahit ano pa mangyari!"

"(Y/N), sa mundo na ito, nandito ang pamilya mo at mga kaibigan mo. Lahat ng bagay na pamilyar sa iyo, and kinalakihan mo. Compared sa laro na iyon na virtual lang... and everyone in it is virtual. Naiintindihan mo ba?"

"Hindi! Lahat ng alam ko nandoon sa mundo na iyon. Yung mga naging kaibigan ko... maging yung tao na..." I struggle to say the words. "Maging yung tao na pinili kong mahalin... Wala sa kanila ang hindi totoo. Lahat sila, lahat-lahat, totoo!"

"(Y/N)!" He calls my name sharply this time, holding my arms to stop me. "Kapag di mo natapos yung laro sa mundo na iyon, magpapatuloy yung laro dito!"

I stare at him, curious and unaware. "A-Ano?"

Gregory sighs heavily and slowly releases me from his grip. "Now that it's come to this, wala na akong maitatago sa iyo." He opens the door for me. "Mag-usap tayo sa labas."

I didn't hesitate to follow him. He ushers me out first before he does, closing the door to my room behind him. I am surprise to find that a hot tea is already waiting for us on our dining table, and with another usher of his hand, I follow to sit on the chair opposite to him. He serves the two of us with tea first as silence enveloped the two of us.

After a few minutes and him finally taking a sip, he answers, "Actually, I'm not a part of this world."

Hmm? Alien ka? I almost ask him but continue to remain quiet and keep such thoughts within me.

He gulps in hard and explains, "Ang ibig kong sabihin is... I come from the "real" world. Katulad lang din dito pero in a much further time. To be honest, a thousand years from the future compared to here. Our people have unparalleled scientific technology. My father is a scientist specialising in game development. The games he had created were all role-playing games that allow players to feel as if they are part of the game. Kagaya lang ng naranasan mo. My brother and I have also carried on his work, and Revolución Filipina... ang unang laro na dinesign naming dalawa."

"Yung nabanggit mo nung isang beses..."

"That's right. Izzy is my brother. And surely, may suspicion ka na rin. He is also in the game of Revolución Filipina. He is the first person you've encountered when you entered the game."

I freeze at that, remembering then Isidro Wenceslao. I didn't notice that him serving as my guide will have a link to this world. That he will be Gregory's brother.

"He first atempted to enter the game world as the character Isidro Wenceslao, kagaya ng napagtanto mo rin," he adds.

"Sinasabi mo rin ba na marami na ring tao ang nakapaglaro nito?"

He nods. "Oo. Pero, hanggang ngayon, wala pang nag-susucceed na matapos ito. At wala pa ni isa ang nagkaroon ng romantic relationship with General Gregorio del Pilar."

I bite my lower lip at that. I wonder if Gregory had been watching the game from afar, knowing then my journey with it.

"Afterwards, to search for new game resources, I've been intrigued by the history of the Earth. Particularly, a thousand years ago from our present time. Hindi na bago ang mga laro na ginamit na reference ang mga previous wars. Sobrang popular ng mga iyon. Researchers and historians have been wondering for years as well why hadn't the population bago ng sa amin... clearly a millenium ago, at this time... didn't make a move to stopped a devastating world war. The Nuclear Wars completely changed everything. And one day, I found the right parallel story for that. The story of General Gregorio del Pilar and the time that people are so ignorant of their own past na historians and researchers alike consider to be the reason kung bakit nangyari yung War na iyon. It draws parallelism para sa akin. A game involving a combination of everything mula sa dalawang magkaibang panahon would definitely be novel and unprecedented. For example..." He looks at me as if to watch for some reaction out of me. "Designing a character from the generation before the Nuclear Wars who traveled back in time to the past. Therefore... I combined this concept with the life of Gregorio del Pilar."

I lower my head and whisper, biting back a cry, "D-Don't continue, Gregory..."

"(Y/N), this reality... The reality you are currently in," he still adds, despite me already understanding everything, "is also a virtual game world."

"Stop!" I close my ears with my hands as if that will halt me from hearing the rest of his words.

"Kailangan mo malaman ang totoo, (Y/N)." Gregory sighs heavily, moving away from his seat before kneeling on one knee next to me as he places his arm against his thigh. "I know that this is cruel, pero kailangan kong sabihin sa iyo. Gregory is the character I am playing in this game, and ang mission ko ay ang gamitin ang isang game to change a weak and timid girl truly unaware of her roots. Kung matatapos niya yung game, then me, in the modern time, ay matatapos din ang laro ko. Imagine, kung ang mga tao bago pa ang Nuclear Wars had been as opened as you've been with history right now, hindi mauulit ang parehong pagkakamali ng nakaraan. At hindi rin mangyayari ang Nuclear Wars that left my home—the real and current Earth—in ruins." He reaches to touch my hand, and I flinch a little, but he keeps holding my hand and I am to weak to fight against him now. "I'm sorry, (Y/N). From the beginning, you were merely a character I designed. Ayaw kong malaman mo sa simula pa lamang, pero... the game's development exceeded beyond my imagination, at nawalan na ako ng control dito. The missions and characters in the game seem to have gained their own mind and life..."

I gather my strength, taking a shaky breath, and look at him. My eyes are a little blurry with tears. "Then... bakit ilang beses mo akong pinipigilan dati na makumpleto yung laro?"

"Kapag nalaman mo ang kamatayan ni Goyo, the game in that world ends. And so is my game here ends, too. Then, you will be reinstated to a game character in a character selection list. Only when a player selects you again will you be able to go through all of your experiences again."

In short, I am just like Goyo and the others in the game. Well, except for Isidro. I am just part of some game. The only difference, while they remain as permanent characters, I am a playable one that a "real player" can choose to play as.

"I have watched you grow from a weak, timid girl to a strong and brave girl. Step by step. With my own eyes." Gregory smiles at me, genuinely. "(Y/N), you are no longer just a character I designed. You have your own mind and your own life. Only stopping the completion of the game can prevent you from changing, and can allow this world you exist in to remain as it is now. Walang kailangan i-restart, if ganoon. I don't want to see you ending up merely as a game character."

But, even understanding that, I remain firm with my decision. I nod and brush the building tears on the corner of my eyes. "It doesn't change my intention but to return. Somehow... pakiramdam ko kailangan ko mag-paalam."

Gregory looks unconvinced. "Walang magbabago pagbalik mo. Ang magagawa mo lamang ay tanggapin ang kamatayan niya... and, at the moment you do so, the game ends and you must leave the game as well. And itong laro na ito..."

I squeeze his hand. "Hindi ba pwede na i-reset or i-restart yung game?"

"As a trial character in the Alpha testing stage, your character can only be selected once every time I run the game. Kapag natapos ko lang malaro ang sixty-six other characters in a particular sequence, then, it'll be your turn again. Before that, you will not appear in this world. Your parents and friends will belong to a new character." He bites his lower lip. "Kahit na ganoon... gusto mo pa rin bumalik at tuluyang tapusin ang laro?"

I smile much more. "Walang ibang mas mahalaga sa akin kung hindi iyon. It will bring peace to me to see him one last time, even in death." I notice him sigh heavily. "Mukhang nakapagdesisyon ka na."

Gregory nods as he stands. "Alright, you may go."He places a hand onto the crown of my head, tussling my hair with a warm smile in return. "(Y/N), good luck. And take care."

* * *

A/N: Masyadong technical ba? You can drop questions sa comments and I answer to the comments na feeling ko kailangan ko sagutin. Kahit gusto kong sagutin lahat ng commentary reactions, baka puro emoji na lang ang maging sagutan natin. 😂😆
And also, you are the absolute best, guys~ Huli kong tingin sa reads nasa 9.84K na. Kaya ba ng 10K bago ang last two chapters? Will be updating tomorrow, and the finale on Wednesday. Follow me on twitter @23meraki for more updates, and again, will you support my story, FLIGHT PLAN, too? ;)

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