At Nathan's house

Kara: Nathan! Nathan! Oh, there you are. Do you want half of this grilled cheese?

Nathan: Whoa! Is that a grilled cheese deluxe from Cheezer's?

Kara: [nodded] Mmm-hmm.

Nathan: Then, yes. Wait, how did you know where I live?

Kara: Babs told me.

Nathan: Of course.

(They eat the sandwiches)

Nathan: How did you manage this?

Kara: I bought it. With money.

Nathan: Nice! Hey, you know what would go well with these sandwiches? Funny internet videos! Dude, check this out. (Begins typing in the name on the keyboard)

Kara: No, wait! I know a really good one. (Types on the keyboard)

Nathan: What, no! You’re just gonna pull up that ostrich thing with the balls again.

Kara: No, I’m not.

Nathan: You’re typing it in! I see it!

Kara: Dude, don’t look! You’re gonna ruin it!

Nathan: [covered his eyes] Fine. It better not be that ostrich thing with the balls. Ready yet?

Kara: It’s loading. Okay... Now!

(Nathan un-covers his eyes to see a video about an ostrich playing baseball while an old man watches it.)

Kara: [laughing hysterically]

Nathan: [annoyed] Man, it’s that ostrich thing with the balls! Why do you gotta lie to me, Kara?

Kara: ‘Cause lying’s my specialty.

Nathan: Punching is your specialty also.

Then, Nathan's dad shows up

Thomas: What are you doing with my sandwich?

Nathan: What?

Kara: Don’t worry. I’ll take care of this with my specialty. [Lies] This isn’t your sandwich. This is our sandwich.

Thomas: This is your sandwich, huh? Then how come it says "Thomas McKnight" on the bag?

Kara: [lies] Huh? it’s supposed to say "Kara Danvers," but they misspelled my name wrong.

Thomas: Nice try, Kara, I know you're lying.

Nathan: [to Kara] Dude, I thought you said you bought this!

Thomas: No, she didn't buy it. Nathan, go get me another Grilled Cheese Deluxe. And please don't eat it when you get back home.
[Went upstairs]

Nathan Argh! Typical Kara Danvers always ruined everything!

Kara: Ah, don’t worry, dude. The line won’t be that long.

(Scene goes to Cheezer’s. The line is extremely long.)

Nathan: Thanks for saving the day with your specialty, you idiot.

Kara: Whatever. Like you could do any better.

Nathan: Pfff. I’m a better liar than you are.

Kara: Please, I'm ten times better than you.

Nathan: Yeah, right. The only thing you’re better than me at is being an ungrateful bi-

(Kara kicks Nathan right in the groin. Meanwhile, two astronauts in blue jackets, Barry & Jones, go around the line and enter the restaurant.)

Kara: Hey! Argh! What the...? Those pork loins are cutting! Argh!

A fat woman: Excuse me! Those fine men are astronauts! They can cut in line. They fought for our country! Huh!

Nathan: (Rises off the ground and gasps)

Kara: Dude, here’s your chance to prove you’re a better liar than me. Or maybe you can’t? Look at your loser face. (Touches Nathan's face all around) It must eat you up inside to not be able to prove you’re a better liar than me. ‘Cause, you can prove nothing. You, Can’t, Prove, Anything!

Nathan: (Slaps away Kara's hand and grabs her collar) Fine! Do you want me to prove I’m a better liar than you? Why wouldn’t we see who is better at lying? Whoever gets caught first loses.

Kara: Okay. It’s not like you’re ever gonna lie better than thi-i-is...

(Nathan lets Kara go.)

Kara: Watch and learn. Ahem, excuse me, Miss.

A fat woman: What?

Kara: We're astronauts. (They enter the Cheezers, cutting in line.) Bam! I told you I’m a better liar than you!

Nathan: Woah, woah, woah! Step aside. I’ll show you how a real man lies. (Approaches a counter) Hey, baby. Give me a Grilled Cheese Deluxe and make it snappy, ‘cause we’re astronauts and we gotta get back up in space. Know what I’m sayin’?

Cheezer's Cashier: Oh, my. (Speaks using a loudspeaker) One Grilled Cheese Deluxe for the astronauts. (The announcement arouses the real astronauts’ curiosity.) That’ll be two fifty.

Nathan: Bam! That’s a moon quarter. (Points to a quarter)

Cheezer's Cashier: Oh! (Takes the money)

Nathan: Hmm, hmm. See?

Kara: Dude, that was lame.

Cheezer's Cashier: Excuse me, sir. Your Grilled Cheese is ready.

Nathan: Thanks. We gotta get this back to our astronaut captain. Know what I’m sayin'? Hmm! Hmm!

Cheezer's Cashier: Oh, is that your astronaut captain over there?

Nathan: Huh? (Sees Kara talking with Barry & Jones) ARGHHHH!!!(Comes up to them)

Kara: This is the guy.

Jones: (Very indignant) You’re the guy?

Kara: I’m...

Kara: [smug smirk] [hands on her hips] Hmm!

Nathan: (Unsure) I’m the guy...

Jones: (Suddenly, Jones turns very excited. He is about to shake Nathan’s hand.) Well! It’s an honor to meet you, captain. Lieutenant Danvers here has told us a lot about you.

Barry: Yeah, it’s great to meet a couple of real fellow astronauts.

Jones: So, what are you guys doing in this dump hole, anyways?

Kara: Ah, you know. We're just pickin' up a Grilled Cheese for our commanding officer.

Barry: Ha-ha! I hear that.

Nathan: Ha, yeah. We were just getting ready to take it back to the compound.

Jones: Compound? We were just getting ready to go there ourselves. Wanna lift?

Nathan: Uh, sure. We’ll take a ride to the compound.

Jones: Come to think of it, why haven’t we seen you around the compound before...?

Kara: We’ve just got back from a 10-year stand in the old shuttlecraft. Isn’t that right, Captain Nathan?

Nathan: Yeah. And we’ve just transferred here. It’s our first day.

Jones: Well, welcome! We’ll be glad to show you around. Now, I hope you’re up to spend a 2.5 million dollars of taxpayers’ money, ‘cause we’re drivin’.

(They use a kind of an Apollo-like spaceship as their vehicle and simply cross the street because the compound is located right opposite the Cheezers.)

Jones: Captain, Lieutenant welcome to the compound! ('Compound' echos)

Kara: Oh, uh, I forgot my ID in my other pants. Can you help me out, guys?

Nathan: [groans] Great.

Jones: Guys, guys, calm down. You can use our IDs. (They pass the checkpoint.) Here. You, guys, might be more comfortable in these. (Passes them jackets)

Kara: Ah, thanks. Yeah, I love these things, but Captain Nathan might not be that into 'em. Don’t you like the uniforms in pink?

Jones: Pink?

Nathan: I only had to borrow a pair that one time from... (Notices an employee list on the wall and quickly picks up a random name) Dr. Asinoskovich. That one time.

Jones: Ah, you know Dr. Asinoskovich? That’s funny. Because she’s right here. (Points at a woman standing with her back towards them)

Dr. Asinoskovich: (Turns around and speaks with a Russian accent) I don’t remember you.

Nathan: Really? Uh... It was one time at that conference. You don’t remember me?

Dr. Asinoskovich: Uh... I don’t remember very much from that conference. I... have to go! (Runs away very quickly)

Jones: Wow! That was awkward. Ah, come on. We’ll give you the grand tour.

Nathan: Dude, you should quit right now. You’re gonna get caught.

Kara: Hmm. We’ll see.

(Lies by Thompson Twins is being played while the astronauts are showing Kara and Nathan around.)

(Kara and Nathan wash their hands in the separate bathrooms, then head out.)

Kara: Man, I don’t think you can last much longer. I think you should give it up.

Nathan: They're not onto me.

Kara: Then I guess it’s time that I start lying at one hundred percent. WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THAT, SUCKER?!

Jones: And what tour would be complete without a stop at the pride of our compound --- the antimatter chamber? (Slaps some clerk on his back) How is she running today, Jimmy?

Jimmy: Well, actually, sir... There’ve been some problems maintaining safe levels of-

Jones: (Slaps Jimmy again, causing Jimmy to drop his clipboard right onto a green button, pushing it) That’s fate. I don’t understand half of what these science types say.

Kara: Oh, that’s too bad. Captain here’s an expert on it.

Jones: You’re an expert on antimatter?

Nathan: Uh... Yeah... Uh... But not compared to how much Kara knows. (Points to Kara)

(An alert beeper sound grows stronger.)

Kara: (Frustrated) Uh...

Nathan: Did you know she wrote a book on it?

Kara: We wrote a book on it.

Nathan: Well, you did most of the work on it.

Kara: But your name’s on the cover.

Nathan: Yeah, right next to yours.

Kara: Above mine!

Jones: Jimmy, knock off that beepin’.

Jimmy: Yeah, actually, sir, I’m having trouble with-

Jones: Trouble? We-ell, these guys are experts! Can you lend a hand, fellas?

Kara: Sure, we can. Go ahead, Captain.

Nathan: (Approaches the control panel) Well, according to the book Lieutenant Danvers wrote, you wanna turn that knob there.

(Jimmy follows the orders.)

Kara: (Cuts in) But captain’s research out-dates mine. So turn that knob over there.

Nathan: But she’s forgetting the recent discoveries he made. Flip those switches.

Kara: Discoveries based on his studies... Hit those buttons.

Nathan: I never said hit those buttons!

Kara: Yeah, Jimmy, you’re not doing like Captain Nathan said! You gotta do it like this! (Bumps over all the buttons)

(The anti-nucleus gets unstable. Pipes burst. Danger light bulbs explode.)

Nathan: Dude, quit! You’re gonna break it!

Kaa: No, you’re gonna break it!

Major Williams: What’s all this commotion?

Jones: Major Williams? Sir! (Specks of dust off Kara and Nathan) We were just showing these new transfers around the compound, sir.

(A warning siren is heard.)

Jimmy: Captain Nathan! Lieutenant Danvers! The antimatter is becoming unstable!

(Shows the antimatter wobbling in a mass.)

Jones: Captain Nathan, Lieutenant Danvers. You can fix it, right?

Nathan: Yes. Lieutenant Danvers can fix it.

Kara: Not without the captain’s help!

Jones: No time for modesty! (He opens the antimatter chamber door and shoves Kara and Nathan in there.)

Nathan: Dude, this is all your fault.

Kara: Excuse me?! You’re the one who won’t admit that you suck at lying!

Nathan: ‘Cause I don’t!

(The others watch Kara and Nathan argue like an old married couple through the window.)

Kara: Why don't you give up and tell ‘em what’s going on so they can help us?

Nathan: No, you do it.

Kara: No way!

(The antimatter shakes even more.)

Nathan: Arghhh!! Fine.

Jones: What’s the holdup?

Nathan: Look. I have to tell you the truth.

Kara nods at Nathan with a smug look on her face.

Nathan: [lied] I have a condition that makes me forget everything in times of extreme stress.

(Kara's mouth hangs open in shock.)

Nathan: Lieutenant Danvers doesn’t have that condition. She’s just an idiot.

Kara: Hey! [Punches him in the shoulder]

Nathan: Ow! We need you to tell us what to do.

Jones: Oh, my... Jimmy, what do we do?

Jimmy: They have to penetrate the anti-nucleus with something solid!

Jones: Right! Listen up! You have one chance at this thing. You have to throw Lieutenant Danvers into the anti-nucleus.

Kara: WHAT?!?!

Jones: It’s the only way. You must sacrifice yourself to save thousands of lives, lieutenant!

Kara: [begging for mercy] NO!! Don’t listen to him, Nathan! DON’T DO IT!!!!

Jones: Do it! Throw her in! THROW HER IN!!!

(Nathan looks around, conflicted.)

Kara: Please! No! No!

Jones: Throw her now! NOW!!!

Kara: [hugs him while crying] I’m sorry! I’m sorry for lying! And I'm sorry for being such a jerk to you! You win, okay? I won’t lie anymore!

Name: It’s too late, Kara. I can’t let everybody die because of us. (Nathan lifts Kara into a bridal-style position and is about to throw him in...)

Kara: NO!!!!

(A zipping sound is heard.)

Kara: Huh? (Sees that her jacket is unzipped)

Nathan: You thought I was gonna throw you in? I told you I’m a better liar than you. (Holds the grilled cheese bag in his hand)

Kara: Your dad's grilled cheese!

Nathan: You better hope this works. Huh!

(Nathan throws a bag with grilled cheese into the anti-nucleus. The anti-nucleus catches the bag with its energy field. Then it catches Nathan...)

Nathan: Nyahh!

Kara: Nathan! Ahh!

( ....Kara as well. It twists, rips them up, and puts them back together, then explodes. It then throws them out, knocking over the chamber door. They both look roasted enough. They groan and cough as they look up at the others.)

Nathan: We’re not astronauts.

(Cut to Nathan's house. Barry and Jones hurl Kara and Nathan out of a van.)

Jones: If you ever lie about being astronauts again, YOU’RE DEAD!!!

Kara: Hey! We saved the city, Astro-

(The astronauts throw the Cheezer's bag in Kara's face and drive away.)

(Thomas is on the computer as they enter the living room.)

Thomas: Where have you been? I’ve been waiting all day.

(Nathan gives his dad's Grilled Cheese Deluxe. It is burned.)

Thomas: What the...? What happened to my sandwich?

Kara: There were spacemen! At Cheezer’s! And the tube... we went down and... everyone wore sweatpants... even us... and then the room with the bad stuff... but... we saved the city with your sandwich!

Thomas: Ugh... Why do you always have to lie to my face?

Nathan:...😑...We ran it over by accident.

Thomas: [believes Nathan] See? Was it so hard to tell the truth?

The End