TW - nightmares, vomiting

Tanjiro’s pov

I held Muichiro close to me as he sobbed into my chest, he was crying hard, it was uncontrollable. Even though I told him Genya is actually okay and that he's not infected, he kept on crying harder and harder to the point he couldn't normally breathe.

It has been like an hour since it happened and he wasn't getting any better, he kept on apologizing and sobbing.

I could see him getting tired from all of it, he was still crying but it was a bit better than before, I felt terrible for making him do such thing, I was stupid for thinking that telling him such thing would make things better.

Mitsuri came into the room to tell us that dinner is ready. I stood but Muichiro didn't, he just sat there, sobbing into Genya's hoodie.

"Come on Muichiro, you need to eat something" I said and he quickly shook his head. I sighed "alright then" I said before leaving the room.

…

I laid in bed before hearing the door open. Muichiro came into the room after taking a bath. "Are you feeling better?" I asked, looking away from my book.

He just shook his head and dropped back on the bed. I tried to make some conversation with him but he didn't answer.  He just laid there staring into a wall, he wasn't crying anymore but it was clear he wasn't feeling any better.

"Can I turn the light off?" I asked and he slightly nodded, pulling a blanket over himself. I turned the light off and laid down on my bed, falling asleep soon after.

…

I woke up in the middle of night due to Muichiro shaking with me. "Muichiro? What do you need?"  I said. "I-I am really sorry for waking you up but… I can't sleep… I am used to sleeping next to someone.. is it okay if I.. sleep next to you?" He said quietly.

"Of course, come here" I said and lifted up my blanket. He got under it and laid his head on my pillow.

"Thank you…" he said quietly.

"It's no problem" I said and Muichiro snuggled closer to me "I am sorry for being a bother for the past days.."

"What are you talking about? you are not a bother" I said and he just looked down, sighing. "All I've been doing for the past days is cry… I don't normally cry often, I just hold it in but.. it seems so hard for the past days"

"Hey don't apologize, I completely understand, you don't need to be sorry for crying.. when you feel sad again just come to me, I am here for you until Genya comes back, alright?"

Muichiro nodded "thanks, I appreciate it.." he said and cuddled up closer to me, wrapping his arms around my waist and resting his head against my chest.

"Try to get some rest now, you need it" I said while running my finger through his silky hair. "Mhm.. I am really tired anyway.." he said and closed his eyes, yawning.

Couple days later

It has been a couple days since the thing happened. It seemed like Muichiro wasn't doing any better… more like way worse. He couldn't sleep properly at night, he refused to leave the room, at least I thought he was eating decently but that changed one day.

When I gave Muichiro his plate with food he took it back into his room like always. Couple minutes later when I finished my food I went back into the kitchen to see Muichiro throwing away the food.

"Muichiro, what are you doing?" I said, scaring Muichiro a bit, making him drop the plate on the floor.

"N-Nothing!" He yelled out, acting like nothing happened. I came over to him to see the food in the trash can. "Why did you throw it out?" I asked.

He only looked at the floor and sighed. "Is this the first time you did it?" I asked and shook his head, probably feeling guilty for doing such a thing and would feel even worse for lying.

"When was the last time you ate?" I asked. He looked down and said "like… four days ago?.. something around that.." he said, making my eyes widen. "Are you serious?!! So you've been throwing the food away this whole time?!" I yelled out.

"I am sorry, okay?! I just can't force myself into actually eating anything!" He yelled out while looking up at me, tears streaming down his cheeks. I sighed "come here" I pulled him into a hug "I understand that you are stressed about Genya not coming back yet but you need to eat something, alright? And if not, don't throw it away, it's a waste"

He nodded "I am sorry…" he apologized one more time. "It's okay, just try to eat something now, alright? There's a leftover soba right here, you can finish that" I said, handing him a bowl with soba.

He grabbed it and looked at it with a disgusted and very anxious look. I sat him down on the chair and grabbed the bowl. I picked some soba with chopsticks and put it closer to his mouth.

"Come on, it's not that much" I said and he sighed, taking the soba in his mouth and chewing it slowly before swallowing.

I kept on feeding him like this until he refused to take another bite. I forced him into taking one more bite but he struggled to swallow it a lot, not being able to stomach more.

"Please don't force me into more…" he said quietly, looking away from me. I sighed and laid the bowl down "alright, but promise me to finish this later, alright?"

He nodded and laid his arms on the table and on top of them he rested his head. "Are you tired?" I asked and he nodded, yawning.

"Hmm it's early but you do need rest" I ruffled his hair "go get some rest". Muichiro nodded and slowly walked into our room.

Muichiro's pov

I closed the door behind me and dropped on the bed, pulling a blanket over me and burying myself into Genya's hoodie.

I missed Genya a lot but I was glad that at least Tanjiro was here. I like him a lot… he's nice and he actually cares about me… but I can't help but think about Genya and worry that something happened to him.

I sighed and closed my eyes, trying to fall asleep… and I did but soon after… another one of my nightmares came.

~~~

I woke up outside, sirens, screams and cries. "G-Gengen?" I said quietly, trying to sit up. Everywhere was chaos, people were running around everywhere, fire and blood was everywhere.

My eyes filled up with tears as I stood up "Gen!... GEN!" I yelled out before seeing Genya on the ground covered in blood, with a hole in his stomach.

I ran up to him and started breathing heavily, panicking. "GENYA! WAKE UP!" I yelled out, shaking with him. I grabbed onto the wound by accident, making my hand completely covered In blood.

I immediately started crying harder "Gen.. please… you can't leave me too!" I yelled out, suddenly feeling someone grab onto my shoulder.

I quickly turned around to see the woman I killed. "You killed me… why?" She said quietly. I backed away a bit "pl-please, leave me alone"

She had her chest all stabbed, big and small holes in her body as she walked closer and closer to me. "Why… why did you kill me… why?... Why?!... WHY?!" she grabbed onto my hoodie and pulled me up.

She pushed me onto the ground and I saw Genya waking up "G-Gengen.." I stuttered out. He looked at me with wide eyes "it's all your fault.." he said with an aggressive tone.

"W-What?" I said as he pushed me down and got on top of me. His saliva and blood from his head was dropping onto my face, making me gag.

I covered my mouth without realizing I had a hand covered in blood, making me feel worse. He opened his mouth and his teeth got bigger and sharper. He bit me into my neck, making me scream.

~~~

Tanjiro's pov

I woke up due to Muichiro screaming. Before I could ask him what's wrong he sprinted out of the room. I ran after him immediately. I saw him run into the bathroom and just a second later, I heard him vomiting.

I walked into the bathroom to see Muichiro hovering over the toilet. I kneeled down next to him and held his hair behind so they wouldn't get in the way.

After a couple minutes he stopped vomiting, he just had his head laid on a toilet seat and breathed deeply.

I let go of his hair and slowly caressed his back. "C-Can you get me some water, please?" I said quietly. "Of course" I said and quickly went to get some water.

I then came back to see Muichiro leaning against the wall, holding his stomach. I sat down next to him and handed him the cup. "T-Thank you" he stuttered out and took a sip of the water.

I pulled him closer "are you feeling better now?" I asked and he nodded slightly. "Did you have a nightmare? Or why did you s-" before I could finish he started crying.

I sighed and pulled him into a hug, not asking any more questions. He was sobbing hard once again, it was hard for him to breathe properly.

After some time he calmed down, he just had his head laid on my shoulder while holding onto me tightly. "Are you ready to talk about it? Or do you not want to?"

He sighed "it was.. just a nightmare… a-a really bad nightmare.." he grabbed onto my shirt tighter. I wiped his tears from his cheeks "do you want to talk about it? Like… What was the nightmare about?"

He stayed quiet for a bit before answering "I saw… Genya and that infected lady… t-they were yelling at me, attacking me… that lady yelled at me why I killed her a-and G-Genya h-he just pushed m-me onto the gr-" I placed my finger on his lips to make him stop talking because he I could see that if he would keep talking he would break down again.

"It's okay, I understand now, you don't need to keep talking" I said and he nodded, laying his head on my chest. "Wanna go back to sleep now?" I asked and he nodded before standing up and going back to our bedroom.

I laid down on my bed and I could see Muichiro from his bed peeking at me multiple times as if he was trying to say something. "Is something wrong? Do you want to sleep next to me again?" I asked and he slowly nodded.

"Alright, come here" I said and lifted up the blanket. He got under it and laid his head on my chest "thank you" he said and closed his eyes.

I just pulled him a bit closer and wrapped my arms around him. He was fast asleep. He looked so peaceful and…cute. His mouth was slightly open as he gave out little silent snores.

I felt myself blush a little as I ran my fingers through his long silky hair. One part of me wanted to kiss him so badly but… the other told me to just go to sleep and ignore it… what if he woke up and got angry. I sighed and only pressed my lips on his forehead before trying to fall asleep as well.

...

Word count : 1966