CHAPTER TWELVE
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MORANA ZORESLAVA HAD SUMMONED DAWN.

That's what Tolya had said, that's what she had felt, the balance between light and dark, the moment where one isn't sure whether it's still night or if the new day is about to come. She felt that balance and then the shadows won, and she was plunged into darkness—yet, for a split second, she could feel the day trying to arrive.

Which was why she'd woken up with a small smile on her face. Whatever it was that was plunging her into darkness had an escape and she would find whatever it was and slaughter it to free herself.

And if it was her father... Oh, how delightful would be to end his life.

She'd woken up with a new purpose in Ravka and that was to make sure when she left nothing could ever drag her back; especially not by some pesky little connection to a madman or, for that matter, a tracker.

"How about a demonstration?" asked Tamar, gesturing for Morana to take the area of the training center, where they, Nadia, and Alina were training—technically it was for Alina to try and master her power but the girl was taking a break. "I've never seen the Crimson Mirage off sea."

Morana's eyes twinkled in excitement and she smirked, "Catch me if I pass out?"

"Why would you pass out?" asked Nadia, who'd been trusted enough by Tamar to learn of her light and shadow manipulations as well as Alina who'd already half figured it out.

"Small Science affects me differently," Morana replied simply as she reached the middle of the room, nodding to Tamar who was hovering around her.

Morana would usually only use her powers at dawn, when she felt the most powerful, but she was hoping she could summon whatever it was she had last night, only now without needing her father's power beckoning her.

Raising her hands in the air, Morana swirled them around, gathering shadows and lights and bending them, and suddenly it was as if the four of them were standing underwater.

Algae sprouted from the sand replacing the floor and all types of colorful fishes, sharks, and creatures swam around them. And though her mind was starting to feel faint Morana tugged at the feeling she had the night prior, trying to bring the power to the surface.

She could hear Alina, Nadia, and Tamar laughing as they swiped their hands in the air, and they passed right through everything like it wasn't even there; mirages, that's all they were. And for a moment Morana felt it, the freeing consuming feeling that made her feel stronger instead of weaker like Small Science. And as balanced as it was at the moment, as balanced as she tried to keep it, the shadows won.

Morana faltered back, her arms falling to the side, and she panted, cursing under her breath. Tamar was by her side in a second, helping her stay upright; once she could breathe and was past the little moment of disappointment, Morana turned to the girls with a grin, wiping the trail of blood she felt running down her nose.

"Who's next?"

Alina matched her grin as she moved forward, putting herself in the path of the training dummies, trying to accomplish what she'd been practicing all morning. The Cut.

Morana saw as Alina summoned light, blue bright rays gathering around her and then she pushed her arm forward, hurling the power at the dummy and it was thrown back, lighting on forward.

Tamar let out a laugh. "Well, it's not the Cut, but it's effective."

Alina turned back to her and Morana grinned just as footsteps sounded behind them and Adrik showed up, slightly out of breath.

"I know, not to be disturbed, but they need you in the war room."

Morana had nothing better to do so she joined the three other women as they headed to the war room. Alina staggered as they reached the room, "David," she muttered.

And Morana walked forward slightly, frowning at the new arrival, a man in handcuffs who looked like he couldn't hurt a fly.

"Oh, so you do know him," Nikolai said and that's when Morana turned her eyes to him; he spared her a glance, giving her a small smile before turning to Alina, his face serious. "He claims to have escaped from a very alive General Kirigan."

Morana's eyebrows raised in surprise as she looked over at David once more. She knew her father was alive, she could feel the pull—it could only be him—but she'd never met him. And was now surrounded by people who all had known him, who all hated him as much as she did.

"He gave himself up without a struggle. We found this on him." Nikolai handed Alina a tattered-looking journal. "He says it's one of Morozova's journals. I, for one, am dying to know more, but he insisted he speak with you."

"Alina..." David tried to get closer to Alina but Tolya stopped him in his steps. Morana leaned against the table of the war room, thoroughly enjoying this newfound acquaintance. "I know I wronged you. Please believe I regret my role in that. I know you have reason to distrust me, but I have no loyalty to General Kirigan."

"He survived the Volcra?" Alina asked though it didn't sound like a question; not when the answer was obvious.

"I'm afraid so." David nodded. "He also knows that you survived and you're in East Ravka."

"Tell us where he is," said Mal.

David shook his head and Morana's lips twitched in amusement, though her smile fell when she felt Nikolai get closer to where she was. "No, no, no. Mm-mm. That would be a very bad idea—"

"You can't expect us to trust you unless you share information," snapped Alina.

David didn't budge. "Confronting him would be suicide." He sighed. "Kirigan used merzost to create something in the Fold. Creatures that do his bidding, the size of two men. Formed of pure shadow. They have no breath to take, no heart to stop, no blood to drain, yet they live. They live and they kill. They are nichevo'ya. Nothing—"

Morana's jaw clenched as he spoke, as she heard him describe the monsters inside her with such ease. Was she all that? Just a nichevo'ya. My little beautiful abomination, her mother's voice echoed in her head.

"—Bullets, blades, fire, all simply pass through and they walk freely in sunlight," David kept going. "I fear that merzost may be the only way to kill them."

"So how is it you manage to get away?" asked Mal.

"Genya," was David's answer. "We tried to escape together, but... the nichevo'ya. She sacrificed herself to get me out. I don't know if she survived."

"A smart spy will always play the victim," said Tolya just as something clicked in Morana's head.

"You make a valid point, Tolya," said Nikolai but Morana cut him off, speaking over him.

"When was this?" she asked, making her presence known in the room. She ignored Nikolai as he stepped closer and turned fully to David. "When did the nichevo'ya attack you?"

"Late last night," was David's answer and Morana's eyebrows raised.

"Are they always there?" she pressed, ignoring the looks of the people around them, ignoring the way she was usurping the interrogation. "Are they always there or do they appear from time to time?"

David frowned and nodded hesitantly. "We never know when they will appear. I've not managed to find a pattern."

Morana let out an incredulous scoff and pushed off the table, and for a brief second her eyes met Nikolai's and the look he gave her told her he knew exactly where she was going with her question.

Nikolai spoke, turning to Alina, "As leader of the Second Army, this is your call. What do we do?"

Alina gave David a once-over before turning to Nadia. "You've known David the longest. What do you think?"

"Kirigan always kept him very close," Nadia simply replied and Alina nodded.

"Take him to a holding cell."

With that Tolya took David away. And Mal cleared his throat, "We need a moment alone, please."

Morana didn't need to be told twice to leave the room, not when she realized what was calling her wasn't her father. Not entirely. But his monsters.

Like calls to like. Monsters called to Monsters. Morana refused to be a monster especially when she'd found the light she'd been searching for buried deep beneath, yearning to balance out the darkness.

She found herself back in the empty training room and pulled up her sleeves as she approached the place Alina had been standing in and clenched her jaw.

Like calls to like.

Oh, look monsters do bleed.

Your father would've loved you;

but only at dawn, he didn't like weaklings.

You're my biggest regret.

Her mother's voice rang through her head, over and over and over again, and Morana could feel all the anger, all the hatred, all the despair, that build up over the years. But she could also hear and feel the light of her life, the love, the care, the thrill, and the joy that echoed through her mind, through her shadows as a reminder that every darkest night led to dawn, led to day.

Morana, my darling creature

My Siren of the True Sea

You're poisoning my blood

Bullshit, darling

Your father ruined you

You ruined me

You ruined everything

Trust that you're not a burden

Say you believe me, darling

Unnatural, cursed

My poison of choice

My biggest regret—

A scream tore through her lips and she shoved her hands forward, a rope of shadows and lights shooting from her palms, wrapping around the dummy and tearing it apart.

Trust me, Mora, let me be the one you allow to see your light.

She remembered she'd wondered. What light? But it was there and she refused to be called a monster for an imbalance that wasn't her fault. For something her father had caused. For something her mother had fueled.

A laugh escaped her lips as she looked down at her hands, a grin growing on her face. She'd done that. And it wasn't Small Science. Not at all. She wasn't summoning shadows or lights. What she did was magic; merzost? What she did, made her heart race in exhilaration instead tiredness. It was all mirages; bullets, knives, and punches, would go through them but she was able to make the mirages palpable. And it hadn't felt unnatural.  It was a balance between day and night; it felt like dawn.

She let her eyes close, throwing her head back as she let the feeling run through her veins, intoxicating. Perhaps she wasn't in control. Perhaps doubts would plague her for eternity. Perhaps Morana was destined to be her father's abomination, her mother's regret. But she knew one thing, now more than ever, she would manage in the world that fought so hard against her, she was going to try to prove her mother wrong.

And if she was poison? She would be the sweetest of them all.

She left the training center, in search of Tolya so he could lead her to David's cell and she could interrogate him further. She walked into the war room, thinking he'd find him there with Nikolai and Tamar as she'd hoped Alina and Mal had left. Only Nikolai stood there though, frowning at a map on the table, and at the sound of the heels of her boots clicking the ground he turned his head to her.

"Where's Tolya?" asked Morana before he could say a word and she saw a muscle in his jaw tick.

"What do you need?" he asked instead and Morana rolled her eyes.

"I'll just go find him myself." She turned to leave but he rushed over to her and grabbed her wrist yanking her back. Morana looked up at him with an unimpressed eyebrow raised, "Let go of my wrist," she said slowly, and Nikolai's fingers let her wrist go.

"Mora, please, I need to apologize—"

"You already did." Morana tilted her head at him. "I forgive you, moi tsarevich."

"Then stop calling me that," said Nikolai through gritted teeth.

"Would you rather Your Highness?"

"We're far gone from addressing each other by titles," Nikolai said, "Stop it."

"Yes, your highness, if that's your wish," replied Morana with a sweet smile and Nikolai's eye twitched.

"Stop pretending nothing ever happened, that I didn't hurt you. Scream at me if you must, tell me off, but don't push us aside, Mora," he said and Morana's lips twitched into a wicked smile.

"Us?" she echoed, "There is no us, your highness. It's quite the scandal to pursue another while you're engaged."

"You told me to make the announcement," Nikolai said, his voice softening from his previous anger, nearly taking a pleading tone. "I can still call it off—"

"And then what, moi tsarevich?" Morana reached for his face, her thumb brushing over his jaw, "You'll kiss away my concerns, my tears? You'll have me in your arms again in the darkness of the night?"

His hand reached for her wrist, holding it in place, "I'll do whatever it takes to have you with me."

Morana hummed. "You'll beg? Crawl? Plead and pray for my touch? For my love?" she asked brushing his hair out of his face with her other hand, like the sweet poison she was.

"You want me on my knees, Mora, all you have to do is say."

"Go on then, darling."

And for the second time, since she'd met him, Nikolai sank to his knees before her, looking up at her with prays in his eyes, devotion one would only give to a ruler. It was almost too easy to lure him in, to make him beg for her, but she couldn't let him see how much he affected her. She could see his eyes drinking her in as he lowered himself to his knees, as he listened to every word that left her lips and she reveled in the power it gave her.

Morana let her fingers bury in his hair, tugging at the roots to make him look up at her, and leaned down to his neck, leaving a trail of kisses until she reached his ear, rejoicing in the low groan that left his lips.

"You look devastating on your knees for me, darling," she whispered, her voice dripping with seduction, a melody of a siren, luring a sailor to cold dangerous waters. "Truly intoxicating."

She kissed the hollow of his throat, feeling his heartbeat against her lips, the grumble that surged from him at her touch.

"But I don't want you to call off the engagement."

"Mora—" He groaned when she tugged harder on his hair, lifting her face to meet his, a small smirk playing at her lips. His eyes were ablaze as he looked at her, frustration bubbling up on the surface, and yet desire seemed to be overruling it.

"That'll humiliate you and Alina both, it'll make you look less than your bastard of a brother when you're so much more than that," she said and his eyes fluttered close as she brushed her thumb against his bottom lip. "My privateer, my prince, my Nikolai."

"Yours," he muttered a smile tugging at his lips, and she knew he was telling the truth, that he truly believed that he could be hers despite the whole world telling him no. Hers, yet his duty came before her—as it should.

Morana clicked her tongue, shaking her head, "But, darling, you're not really mine, are you? You'll never be."

"I already am, Mora," argued Nikolai, his jaw clenching, his eyes darkening, "I kneel before you because I choose to, not because I must. I'll do whatever it takes to have you with me, even if it means getting a few scuff marks on my knees."

"Have me with you? In your bed when everyone's asleep? Hiding in the night because no one shall see us?" Morana traced the curve of his jaw with one finger. "Alina will be your wife and I shall go back to the sea because I'll only be a mistress to the ocean."

His mouth opened to speak but Morana cut him off as she pressed her lips to his, and he was quick to kiss her back. She let him taste the poison he craved so much, and let herself get lost in the feeling of him for a single moment of weakness. Morana softly bit his bottom lip before pulling away, earning a groan out of him.

"So really, moi tsarevich—" she pressed her lips to the corner of his mouth, "—as devastating as you look, you're begging for a woman you can't have."

And then she heard footsteps approaching and smiled down at him, as Nikolai's eyes returned from their dazed state to clarity and he processed her words. With that, she shoved his head back, and stepped away from him, seeing Nikolai's jaw clench.

"Get off your knees, Nikolai, it's unbecoming for a prince to beg," Morana said and he glared at her.

He stood up, the footsteps getting closer, and walked towards her, eyes ablaze and it seemed the anger festering beneath his skin as he toyed with him had grabbed the desire by the hand, fueling his intensity. He smirked down at her, a taunt in his lips though his eyes were burning with passion.

"A little groveling never hurt anyone. But don't be fooled. I'm not begging for a woman I can't have. I'm begging for a woman who's worth the risk, worth the fight, who's worth every knee I'll ever bend and every word I'll ever plead," Nikolai said, a glint of challenge in his eyes. "And, Mora, you're worth everything."

Morana's breath got caught in her lungs, and thankfully Nikolai's attention was caught by Tolya and Mal who came barreling into the war room, searching for him. She could feel her heart in her throat, her head spinning. She clenched her jaw, pushing her feelings away, she was the Crimson Mirage she would not be won over by pretty words and pretty faces.

Mal and Tolya didn't even seem to notice the tension in the room as they began explaining their theory about the Neshyenyer, the Saint-made blade that could cut through shadow, and Morana leaned against the table as she heard, her eyes catching Nikolai's now and then. 

"The blade in Ahmrat Jen is indeed a replica," said Nikolai at the end of their spiel, the mask of a too-clever prince back on like he hadn't just fallen to his knees for a pirate. "The original was stolen long ago. I suspect it's never left Shu Han. If it turned up in the wider black market, Sturmhond would've heard about it."

"This could be the only weapon able to kill Kirigan's shadow creatures," Mal said, and Morana pursed her lips because she wasn't so sure that was true. Perhaps she could kill them too. Like calls to like. If they could try and kill her if she was away, then she would try and slaughter them when they were close. "We need to find it."

"It's a valuable old sword, sure," Nikolai conceded, "That doesn't mean the story is true."

"Any chance is better than no chance," said Mal.

"That's a very Sturmhond thing to say," said Nikolai with a small grin, giving Morana a pointed look, she smiled sweetly at him letting her eyes glare for her. "Were he here, he would surely commend you."

"It's unsettling how you talk about him like he's someone else," replied Mal with a frown, looking at Morana with a questioning look and she grinned in answer.

"And he would suggest that our friends in Ketterdam might be the perfect crew for the job," said Nikolai, before he grinned at Tolya, "Will you send a letter to the Whisperer from me? She must know her favorite brother needs help, otherwise, she'll shove any offers up our arses."

"Why not go there yourself?" asked Morana, her lips twisted into a smirk, "Beg a little."

"I am at my most charming on my knees," replied Nikolai with a grin, and Tolya and Mal snorted, "but I'm not sure Kira would like that. She might just kick me back to Ravka."

"At least you'd have a fast way back." Morana shrugged.

"I'd rather not have to rely on being kicked. And I have business to attend here. People to persuade, armies to lead, protecting the country, groveling, poison to taste, the likes."

"Ah, the glamorous life of a monarch," quipped Morana with a smirk.

Mal replied with a deadpan expression, "Yes, because tasting poison is the epitome of leadership."

"It certainly comes with its perks." Nikolai grinned, winking at Morana and the girl glared.

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author's note:

changed the time of genya and david's
attempted escape for plot purposes

how'd you like this chapter?
did it fit with the others,
cause I'm not sure if I'm sure it did
but at the same time i liked it
so that's what you get.