Freya

My energy doesn't return, even after several hours of rest. Against Hana's preference, Alaric prescribed me bedrest for the day. I'm allowed to return to my shared room with Lei, at least.

As soon as I returned, Lei was there. She didn't bother asking how I was or how I was feeling. We didn't talk about the cloud or the storm or the giant black marks maiming my arms. We didn't talk at all. Lei stayed silent as I stared at the ceiling, drifted in and out of sleep, replaying the events of the previous night in my head.

We certainly didn't talk about the argument we had before the storm. Instead, she brought food and reminded me to drink water, noting when an hour had passed and I hadn't had a sip of water.

The sun is setting again by the time I start to feel like myself, enough energy to sit up. Lei, who sat perched on her bed, knees to her chest and head in a book, raises her head.

"Do you need something?" she asks.

I shake my head. "Just tired of lying down is all."

She looks back at her book. I squint my eyes, trying to get a read of the cover, but it's too far away for me to decode. Watching her eyebrows furrow as she concentrates, I can't help but remember how she was when I first met her. Though petite, Lei's features are all sharp and striking. Her personality is even more so.

But tucked in the corner of the bed intently focused on her book, I can't help but acknowledge how young she looks. I watch her features, the way her lips tilt up, light fills her face as she turns to page.

"What're you reading?" I ask.

She glances up at me, her hands subtly sliding across the front cover to conceal it from view. "Nothing important."

I open my mouth to press further, but the soft look in her face disappears as she looks at the window, narrowing her eyes.

"Did you hear that?"

I pause before shaking my head. "Hear what?"

Tucking the book beneath her pillow, her frown deepens and she clambers from the bed over to the window. Peering out, she urges me over. I shift my body to peer through the foggy glass outside. We're on the second story, but it isn't a tall building.

I eye the street outside, landing on two figures standing in the shadow of a low-hanging sign.

Squinting my eyes, I can't quite make them out.

"I think they're arguing," she says.

"Who?"

"You can't see?" she asks, surprised for a second. I raise my brows. "Alaric and Hana."

This piques my interest. I lean closer. "What're they saying?"

"I can't quite hear... their voices are muffled. But raised." She leans an inch closer. "Definitely raised. And his body language..." She ducks down, out of view, her hand darting out to pull me, too. "Oops."

"Are they looking?"

"If you can't see them, Alaric won't be able to see us, but Hana will."

I lean my head against the wall, trying to imagine what they could have been arguing about. But it isn't hard.

She glances sideways at me. "You know when the cloud rolled through, Hana didn't look terrified like she should've." She meets my eye. "She looked excited."

A shudder crawls down my spine. "You saw her?"

She nods. "I tried to follow you. But as soon as you went into the forest, the cloud cleared away, along with the worst of the storm. Hana was there, too, demanding to know where you were."

"How did you find me?" I ask.

She hesitates before responding. "Alaric knew where you were." I let out a breath of air. "Look, about what I said—"

"We don't have to talk about it."

"I know Killian—"

"I don't want to talk about Killian," I say firmly.

She swallows, accepting my refusal. Because even though I know it was the cloud, what I saw in there was so real I could've touched it. And it represented my wildest fears.

Alaric said that neither Killian nor Casimir's bodies were in the Saulun mountains. But he knew better than me that where the cloud is concerned, there are worse fates than death.

If I condemned Killian to that... I shun the thought, my heart squeezing.

A knock on the door draws both our attention. Lei rises to her feet to open it, revealing Alaric. His eyes land on me, knees up on the bed.

"You're awake," he says, slightly breathless.

What were you arguing with Hana about?

"How do you feel?"

"Better."

His jaw tenses. "Hana wants you to train."

I exchange a glance with Lei. "She barely just woke up," Lei protests.

Alaric acknowledges her words by glancing briefly at the floor, expression shifting. Slightly sheepish. "It's... it's good to keep momentum."

Lei glances back at me, shifting her body slightly so she's between us. "Is that what Hana thinks?"

"I'm fine," I say, dropping my feet to the floor. "But Lei is coming too."

Behind Alaric, Harris appears. Alaric doesn't even acknowledge him. "She'll be in good company, then," Harris says. He glances at me in my thin dress. "It's cold outside. I'll wait downstairs."

"Also Hana's idea?" Lei probes.

Alaric ignores her, meeting my eye. "Harris is right, dress warm." He closes the door shut quietly behind him, letting the dust settle around the corners of the room. As I rise from the bed, bones aching as I pull my cloak around my shoulders, I can't help but notice Lei's expression.

"What're you so happy about?" I ask.

"Alaric."

"Oh." I raise my brows. "So you like him now?"

"Like? Let's not get ahead of ourselves." She throws me a cunning grin. "The argument with Hana, the twitch in his jaw when I mentioned her name. Those I like. Because all rebellions start with an individual disagreeing with their leader."

~

None of us speak as we move through the forest. Alaric leads us, Harris trails behind. In the middle, I stick close to Lei, the remnants of the cloud still bubbling beneath my skin.

The trees breathe frozen air as they sway in the wind.

We walk for another several minutes. I can't help but think about what I saw in the cloud, how it tainted me. It was as real as when I'd harmed myself outside the forest in Veymaw. More real than I've experienced in Torinne, even when Cadence was overcome with the cloud.

What was different? Why did it grasp me so strongly this time?

Alaric comes to a halt before the opening of the cave, turning to glance at Harris.

"We won't be long," he says. Harris raises a brow, but before he can say anything Alaric clarifies. "This cave is deeply sacred. Its energy will be disrupted by any shifter presence."

I sneak a glance at Lei who eyes Alaric wearily, but doesn't protest. Harris merely gruffs in response.

I follow Alaric into the cave, my breath icy around my face. But he doesn't stop by the lumin bugs, he continues into the dark, deep cavern. I shudder.

"Where are you taking me?" he doesn't answer, continuing forward. "Alaric?"

He halts. In the dark of the cave, his eyes seem black. "Don't be afraid," he says softly.

I hesitate, wrapping an arm around my chest. "Did Hana ask you to take me here?"

"No."

We stare each other down, neither one of us willing to be the first to break. I want to believe him, to trust that there are some things he does against Hana's will. I want him to be good.

He ends the exchange by turning around and continuing forward.

"Was that true? What you said about the cave being disrupted by shifter energy?"

We walk several seconds before he responds. "No."

I think about what Lei said in the cottage about rebellion.

"Do you trust me, Alaric?"

He halts, turning to look at me over his shoulder. "Yes."

I furrow my brows. "Why?"

"I believe you're good."

"You barely know me," I say. When he doesn't respond, I ask another question. "And what about Lei? Do you trust her?"

"No."

"That doesn't make any sense. We're both in the same situation. We're both trying to escape your trap."

"Lei has certain... alliances that I don't agree with."

Killian.

"Lei and I have the same alliances, Alaric." I let out a shaky breath. I'm not sure what it is, my desperation to have answers, my confusion around his motives, or what Lei said that push me to say these things.

"But Lei is painfully loyal to them. I cannot trust her."

"And I'm not?"

"I don't mean that as an insult," he says. "But we've both been burned. You understand what it feels like, how it shapes you, how it makes you more careful with your alliances. You listen to reason, Freya. You do not blindly follow because of loyalty. So I choose to trust you."

He walks closer to me, his eyes piercing mine in the low light. When he looks at me, I know we are both thinking of Killian. Of the conversation we had about him in the forest, when Alaric revealed that they'd been friends.

You're not the first one who's been tricked by Killian Li. The memory of his words echoes through the cave. And you won't be the last.

"What did he do to you?" I ask. "Why do you hate him so much?"

He presses his lips together into a fine line. "We should keep moving."

"And what about Harris? Do you trust him?" I press. "Maybe you don't even trust Hana."

"We're wasting time," he says, ignoring my comment. He continues forward without waiting for me.

Watching him go, I bite the inside of my cheek as he disappears into the darkness of the tunnel. All the warmth I felt in the entrance of the cave has evaporated. Only ice travels through the ground.

Thinking of Lei and Harris waiting patiently outside, I take another step forward, plunging into the darkness after Alaric. If I'm gone for too long, Lei will come for me.

Of that I'm sure.