With Lord Lumos sufficiently placated for the time being, we can all breathe a little easier.

As Mr. Jenkins and I step down from the cart with Jack's help, Arissa keeps her father at bay, loudly exchanging heated words with him.

Sorry, did I say exchange? I meant to say that Arissa is the one getting all fired up. Her father is simply her latest victim.

She recounts to him, in elaborate and colorful detail, the events leading up to our arrival at Town Hall, though she stretches things out of proportion at all of the relevant parts. She also leaves out the bits where she does questionable things in order to attract Jack's attention, but I'm not going to correct her. She scares me.

"..We get into a crash with two- No, three really big- Huge carriages!" Arissa explains enthusiastically, while her father gradually becomes less apathetic as her listens to her story unfold.

Make note of that. Story.

"..Then, our carriage suddenly erupts into flames! WHOOSH!!!" She shouts, gesturing madly about her. "Flames here, flames there, flames everywhere! The carriage becomes a burning, blazing deathtrap! The scent of fear and burning flesh is in the air! Terrified screams fill the night!" Here, she demonstrates with one of her own. "AAAAHH!!! Somebody save us! We're being burned aliiive!!!"

Several bespectacled faces peer out of the windows of the Town Hall in alarm, then recede when they realize that it's only Arissa. I notice a number of drapes and curtains being hastily drawn, while lantern lights wink out of existence, making the entire building appear deserted in a matter of moments.

Wise people.

"..So we're all horrified at the prospect of dying in the massive fireball-"

"-Your dress isn't even singed." Her father states abruptly. He raises an eyebrow at her, becoming unexpectedly suspicious. "How is that possible, pumpkin?"

"Uh- Uh!" She panics for a second upon hearing such an unforeseen question, but then composes herself almost immediately. "I.. Took great care to let only the bottom hem of my gown burn?" She answers, flashing him her most charming smile. "..By the way, you really need to find a better coach painter. Our transport caught on fire far too quickly for it to be considered a well-done job. It was mediocre, at best. At worst, it's swindling. If I were you, I'd sue him for fraud and... Hmm, what was the other thing called? The one with the endangerment charges? Hmph, no matter. Sue him for it."

"Of course, angel. I'll do that first thing in the morning." Lord Lumos responds soothingly.

Arissa slams her fist into her open palm. "No, even better! Isn't Judge Willis attending the ball this evening?"

"Yes, I do believe that he is."

"Excellent! He's a friend of yours, isn't he?"

"Naturally." Lord Lumos booms.

"There you are, then. You won't even need to pull any strings for this one!"

Arissa may oftentimes act like her head's full of fluff, but in reality, she's shrewd and savage.

That's why I like her.

Jack looks up at her with newfound respect. "Wow, she's so smart." He mumbles.

"Sometimes." I answer, snorting.

"Anyway," Arissa continues with her increasingly fanciful tale. "..There we are, waiting for help that may never arrive-"

"-But, obviously, it did." Lord Lumos interrupts.

Arissa glares at him. "Who's telling this story, papa? You or I?"

"My apologies, pumpkin. Please carry on."

"Okay. ..So, spitting orange flames lap around our carriage, and we're trapped. Oh, shall we ever see the sun rise again?!!" She yells dramatically, quivering in mock terror.

"We will if you don't finish your narrative soon!" A quavering elderly voice screeches at her irritably from somewhere up in the bowels of Town Hall. A window slams shut, punctuating his remark.

"Pooh to you, good sir!!! I nearly perished tonight!" Arissa hollers back.

"If we should be so lucky..!" Another voice screams down, this one female.

Arissa squints up at her dimly backlit figure until her eyes widen in recognition. "I will have you ejected from your seat of office, Mrs. Mallory!" Arissa bellows woundedly. "I know that it's you up there, you can't hide from me!"

The lady in question blows a wet raspberry at my friend and beats a hasty retreat down the Halls' back stairs, cutting across the nearby butcher's yard. His lone dog barks at her angrily, and she leaps away with surprisingly great speed, vanishing into the darkness with nary a trace.

Arissa continues her account, not missing a single beat. "..The raw scent of burning wood and horsehair permeates the air! We are all about to die!" Here, she allows an appropriate pause, then proceeds thusly. "..Then, just when all hope seems completely lost, BOOM!!! The carriage door is smashed open! Shards, splinters, and fragments of flaming wood and debris fly everywhere with amazing force! And there, in the midst of all of the chaos and carnage, stands the dreamiest of men: Jack." Here, she clasps her hands together underneath her chin and spins around with an adoring sigh. She stops on observing her father's mistrustful look.

"A- Hem! Back to the story, then! ..There he stands, perfect jawline, with a body chiseled like a statue made from the best and finest marble, his eyes ablaze-!"

"I didn't know that." Jack whispers to me incredulously.

Oh, you sweet, innocent boy. She'll eat you alive.

I blow out a gusty sigh and focus my eyes on the father-daughter duo as I answer. "Obviously, she finds you extremely attractive, Jack. That's how she sees you."

He covers his face with a hand, abashed. "O-oh." He chuckles shyly, a flushed red peeking out from between his fingers. He clears his throat and runs his fingertips through his hair in a completely flustered manner. "Really?"

"Yes, really." I hiss, trying to listen in to the Lordling's discussion.

"Wasn't she-?"

"-Fire-dazed at the time? Yes. She's just painting you in the best light possible for her father's sake." I roll my eyes. "If I were you, I'd be preparing for marriage."

He stumbles back in shock, stammering. "I-I d-don't think that L-Lord L-Lumos would ever a-allow that."

"Then you clearly aren't aware of just how stubborn and headstrong she really is. One might even use the term 'obstinate' with equal effect. If she is truly determined to have you, and I see that she must, then she will most definitely stop at nothing until she persuades her father to give her exactly what she wants. She's really rather impressive in that way."

I decide that that's more than enough insight into Arissa's life for tonight and stop talking. I don't want to seem too helpful, after all. This much information I deem to be more than adequate to get the wagon wheel rolling, as the saying goes. Now the rest will be up to everyone else, thank Nox. Maybe I can just relax for the remainder of the evening, for a change.

But alas, that's not likely to happen.

"..I mean, sure, Evelyn gave me a little push to begin with, but Jack was the true hero tonight." Even as she says it, Arissa gives me an apologetic glance. I blink back at her and dip my head to let her know that I'm alright with her lie, this time. She nods back subtly, relieved.

Jack seems about to protest, so I flash him a look, silencing him. "She's doing this for your future, so don't be modest. Just go along with it."

"B-but that's not how it happened at all!"

"As far as we are each concerned, it's exactly how it happened, young master Jack. We are all agreed on this point." Mr. Jenkins smiles at the boy humorlessly, though not unkindly.

"The Earl of Enveera has been angling for a matrimonial match between himself and the honorable Lady Arissa for some time now. She, of course, won't have him, (she's no fool) but he's become increasingly persistent on the matter over the past few months. And, speaking quite frankly, master Jack, I would much rather have someone such as yourself to marry her, and in so doing obtain the position of Lord one day, than to have a completely undeserving and arrogant excuse for a man join the good Lady in wedlock. I could not bear to serve him, and she would undoubtedly be completely miserable for the rest of her life. I refuse to have that." Mr. Jenkins sets his jaws determinedly.

"Whaaat?!!" Jack inhales sharply in surprise, then squares his broad shoulders. "If the Earl is really as bad as you say..."

"Oh, he's probably far worse than that. He's an absolute bloody nincompoop as far as I'm concerned, and I invariably end up having to listen to Arissa complain about his sheer stupidity several times a week now. Please, make it stop." I groan in desperation. "I can't stand it anymore!"

"Please, Miss Evelyn! The Earl may well have you executed for slander such as that!" Mr. Jenkins shushes.

"Ha! It's not slander if it's true." I smirk delightedly at the elderly man's horrified expression. "Don't worry about me, sir. I'm practically under Lord Lumos' protection, and I can handle myself far better than I let on to anyone else, I assure you."

Mr. Jenkins doesn't appear to be wholly convinced, but he politely drops the subject.

Oh, if only all men could be so considerate! Then I wouldn't feel the need to put them off of me so much.

..I'd also have no more urges to feed them to mud eels and wild boars, either, in that case.

Jack twists the bottom hem of his shirt nervously. "It seems like a real long shot. I mean: Me versus a fancy Earl?!! And he's such a rich one, at that! I don't really have that much that I can offer Arissa in the way of means, you know."

"She has money, my boy. That's not what she requires from you, at any rate. She needs love, attention, patience, understanding, and respect. The truly important things in life that the Earl would not be very likely to provide her with." Mr. Jenkins responds to Jack promptly, crisp efficiency in his every syllable. He trembles with feeling as he continues. "We all love Lady Arissa dearly, young master Jack. It would pain us deeply to see her trapped in a loveless marriage to a-"

"-Fat fleatrap." I finish. I shrug off Mr. Jenkins' grieved face. "That Earl will surely cause my best friend no end of trouble and vexation, so I'd rather prefer to avoid that. Anyway, the Lumos family has far more money than the Earls' does, so don't be too worried about that. You absolutely should be as nice as possible to Lord Lumos, because it will ultimately be his approval that you seek, so do worry about that. But above all else, just act naturally and be yourself, and everything should be just dandy."

What? I might as well help out if it secures Arissa's future happiness.

Jack appears to be becoming quite overwhelmed. A couple beads of nervous sweat form on his brow, and he quickly wipes them off with the back of his hand. "Lord Lumos is terrifying." He confesses.

"Only because you like his daughter. ..But I bet that you could easily take him in a fight." I quip cheerfully. "Now go knock his block off, Jacky boy!"

"It's socks, Miss Evelyn." Mr. Jenkins corrects.

"We'll see, we'll see." I grin and shove Jack directly in front of Lord Lumos. "Impress away!"

Word count: 1870