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Memories

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Chapter 55: Memories (Rhys's POV)

"I cannot even begin to tell you how unnecessary this is. You seriously- Rhys!" Stella screamed as she almost tripped on her way inside the apartment. 

"Sorry," I said almost immediately while stifling a laugh. I put my free arm around her waist and pulled her a step back as I leaned over to shut the front door behind us. My other hand remained firmly planted over her eyes, covering them. 

She huffed softly, "If I fall and break a bone, you should remember, I strongly believe in an eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth," she warned sharply. 

I paused and let out a quick breath. "This is too hard," I mumbled, mostly to myself. "Don't open your eyes," I demanded before pulling my hand down and walking around to stand in front of her. 

She let out a small giggle as she peeked at me with one eye. 

"Stella," I warned slowly. 

"Sorry," she grinned, closing her eyes again, holding the bouquet in both hands. 

"Give that to me," I said, taking it from her and leaving it on a table nearby. I took advantage of that moment and stared at her as she stood there with her eyes closed, oblivious to everything I had planned. 

I stepped closer to her and I sensed her body grow rigid. The next step I took forward, her breath hitched. As I leaned down to whisper in her ear, she said my name shakily. A smile tugged at my lips. "Don't move," I ordered. 

Before she could ask me any questions, I scooped her up in my arms. 

The sudden movement caught her off-guard and she let out a small yelp, holding onto me tightly as I laughed and began heading upstairs. "You're being ridiculous, I could have just walked," she exhaled, still keeping her eyes closed. 

"Then this surprise would lose half of its effect." 

As hard as she tried, the grin on her lips couldn't be hidden. I kicked the sliding door to her balcony open as quietly as I could and stepped out, lowering Stella to her seat. 

Stella's balcony had a perfect view of New York City's skyline and her penthouse being so high, it was even better than the few from a rooftop. 

A gentle breeze blew by and she sat with her eyes closed as she tucked her hair behind her ears. "Can I open my eyes now?" 

"Not yet," I said, taking a lighter out of my pocket and lighting up the one candle between us after a few attempts and very shaky hands. 

"Are we on my balcony?" she asked with a knowing smile on her lips. 

"You can look," I said, my eyes focused on her. 

She peeked one eye open and then the other with a tiny chuckle. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't take my eyes off of her as she took in the candlelit dinner between us and let out a soft gasp. 

Her eyes lifted to mine briefly before traveling across the rest of the balcony, the string of lanterns hanging above us which I credited to Logan and Christian's efforts, and the pile of pillows and blankets right beside the door, resting against the wall. 

Regardless of everything, the most beautiful thing out here tonight was Stella. She never failed to take my breath away, especially tonight. The small gold hoops in her ears twinkled against the candlelight as she scanned the place before her eyes settled on mine again. 

"You're crazy," she mumbled softly, "did you do all of this?" 

"With plenty of help, yes. Logan and Christian helped me set up and Zarah made sure the food didn't burn to a crisp while I went to pick you up. She actually left only a little while ago." 

Her amused gaze followed my movements as I uncovered our plates and served us both properly before grabbing the bottle of wine sitting in the ice bucket. 

"Chardonnay, Ms. Almonte?" I offered. 

"Absolutely," she laughed, holding her glass out for me. 

I poured hers first before repeating that for myself. 

Her eyes held mine above her glass as she hid her grin behind it. "I never knew you were such a romantic, Mr. Romanov," she said, "all this time and I never got any surprises like this." 

"Do you like surprises like this, Dorogaya?" 

She nodded lightly, taking a sip from her glass. 

"Then I'll make sure to do them often," I exhaled quietly, leaning back in my seat as I watched her. 

She picked up her fork and glanced pointedly at my plate. "Aren't you eating?" 

"I will," I muttered absentmindedly. 

Her movements slowed as she took her first bite and then dropped her fork to the plate, laughing, "Rhys. Eat. And quit looking at me like that. It hasn't been that long." 

I shook my head lightly in response, "I wouldn't be able to survive any longer than this without you, Stella." 

She looked away, suppressing her smile and hiding her flushed cheeks before she cleared her throat and changed the subject. "If I remember correctly, you owe me some childhood stories, don't you? I've been dying to know. Tell me." 

I nodded slowly. "What do you want to know?" 

"Everything. Did we hate each other at first sight back then too?" 

I chuckled, "Not quite. It was far more complicated and it's a very long story." 

She leaned forward slightly with intrigue. "Well, it's a good thing I have all the time in the world for you. I want to hear about it, tell me." 

The majority of dinner passed with me reciting any and every significant memory I had of us and Stella grinning ear to ear as if she remembered it all. 

Despite knowing that she didn't remember me at all, for the first time in my life, that didn't seem to bother me as much. Instead of dwelling over the fact that I had all these memories of us that Stella didn't and I had all these moments that made me fall in love with her while she didn't, all I could think about was that smile on her face. 

Even if she didn't remember us, she very much loved me right here, right now, and it was probably more than she ever could have as a little girl. 

Hearing about these memories was good enough for her, so why the fuck wouldn't it be enough for me? I was lucky to have them and it was about time I stopped taking those moments for granted. 

We'd been sitting in an almost solemn silence as she poked and prodded at her empty plate before finally meeting my gaze. 

"Doesn't it bother you? That you remember all these things about me, about us, and I don't remember them about you?" she asked. 

"It used to," I answered honestly, "but as of this moment, they don't bother me at all. I think I'm lucky that I have these memories." 

"Lucky?" 

"Hmm," I nodded, setting my empty glass on the table, "I get to love you in all the ways I can. And a little more in the ways only I can." 

"It feels unfair," she whispered with a small frown, "I don't get to love you in those ways I should be able to." 

"No, you don't. But you love me in all the ways you possibly can and that's all that matters. That's all that should matter. These memories mean a lot to me but it means even more that I could finally share them with you." 

Her eyes drifted to mine and for the entirety of this night, I couldn't stop watching her. 

Something felt different tonight. The warm and golden candlelight lit up her face and gave it a strange kind of glow as her cheeks flushed in a dusty rose shade, and the soft breeze continued blowing throughout the night, making it all the more pleasant. The whole night felt unreal. 

A small sigh escaped her as she folded her arms on the table and turned to look at the view. 

I wondered what thoughts were going through her head, if she was just as confused and curious as I was about what would happen next between us. 

After everything, I doubted my plans for Damien, I wondered if it would be better to simply stay as far away from him as possible. I underestimated him but he had the power to take everything from me now, just the way he did all those years ago. If I lost Stella, I'd lose everything. 

Is it even worth the risk? 

"Rhys."

"Hmm?" 

"Are you going to kill my father?" 

I'd thought a lot about this in the past few days and I could only come to one conclusion. "I'm going to do whatever you want me to, Stella." 

Her eyes flew to mine full of shock and surprise. "What?" 

"He's not worth losing you. I can't gamble on you. I'll do whatever you want, whatever it takes for you to stay." 

She didn't even hesitate in her reply. "He doesn't deserve to be here, Rhys. He doesn't deserve to be a part of our lives. All he ever does is manipulate me. I'm tired of playing his games. You told me, remember? If I don't take revenge on people who do me wrong, nobody will do it for me. And I'm tired of him hurting me. If you won't—" 

"I will," I cut her off, "I'll do whatever it takes for you. Say the words, Stella and you'll never have to see him again. He'll never be able to hurt you. I'll make sure he's dead. Do you want me to kill him?" 

After a mere second, she nodded with certainty. "I do." 

"You don't have to tell me twice. I'll take care of it, I promise." 

"You'll take me with you. I'm not asking." 

"If that's what you want, all right. Anything for you." 

A quiet sigh of relief escaped her as she finally relaxed in her seat. 

"I love you, Stella." 

With a small smile, her cheeks turned pinker. "I love you too, Rhys." Taking her glass, she downed whatever was left of her wine and it started to hit her the longer she sat still without another sip. But we had downed the entire bottle of wine tonight and she had work tomorrow. 

I kept her up for far too long. "Come on. Let's get you tucked into bed," I mumbled, rising from my seat and moving to her, helping her up and steadying her with a firm grip. 

She stumbled a bit but tried to maintain her balance as she caught onto my jacket. "No," she whined, "let's stay up here a little longer, please? I like it up here. Come, let's..." She glanced around and then walked on wobbly legs to the pillows and blankets resting on the floor. "Let's sit." 

I followed behind her closely, ready to catch her the moment she slipped but we made it to that corner and settled under the blankets quickly. 

Dropping her head against my shoulder, she whispered, "I don't feel like working tomorrow." 

"Do you have to?" I asked. 

"You should be encouraging me to work," she snorted softly, "if I had it my way, I'd be working from home all the time. But there have been a lot of clients lately. Once this season passes, I'm going to take a little break." Her arms slipped into mine under the blanket and she held me a little tighter. 

My eyes snapped forward as I heard soft raindrops pattering against the railing and a tiny, faint grumble from the sky. 

"It's raining," she breathed out. 

The downpour picked up within moments and I grew a little uneasy, watching the rainfall. 

Fuck, I hate the rain. So does Stella... 

I turned to look at her as she lifted her head and turned to look at me. "Are you leaving soon?" she questioned with a small pout. 

God, I won't survive this.

I tried my best not to let my gaze wander down her face but I couldn't help it as I stared at her lips. "I really should," I said quietly, "I told you I would." 

"You did," she agreed in a soft whisper. "But do you have to go?" 

"Do you not want me to?" 

"Can't you just stay with me? I don't like being alone when it rains." Her gaze drifted down to my lips. "I don't like being without you anyway," she admitted. 

"Don't do something you'll regret when you're sober, Stella," I warned cautiously. 

A tiny grin tugged at the corners of her mouth. "I'm not that drunk, Rhys. I know what I'm doing." 

"Stella—" 

"Trust me," she whispered, lifting a hand to my cheek as she pulled me in closer, "I know exactly what I'm doing." 

It was nothing but a soft brush of her lips against mine at first but control seemed to slip away quickly as the kiss grew more frantic, more demanding as she tugged at my jacket, drawing me closer. 

She gasped breathlessly against my lips as I deepened the kiss but I had to warn her before we went further. "Stella, wait," I rasped out as she moved forward and dropped her knees on either side of me, straddling my lap. 

"I'm conscious enough to know what I'm doing, Rhys," she panted lightly, dragging her hands down my chest, "I won't regret doing anything with you. I could never regret you."

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Chapter 55

So, I've decided that this book is going to be 58 chapters, including the epilogue, which means we only have 3 more to go ahhhh

I'm so excited to write the epilogueeee

I also think this is the longest book in the series lol cuz 58 chapters is a lot, even for me

anyways

next ch: closer