(Song of the chapter: 'Rewrite the Stars' - The Greatest Showman Cast)

I stared blearily at the field, scowling at the brilliant evergreen grass. The sun was shining, birds were chirping, dew was absolutely thriving on leaves and flowers everywhere, and even the morning breeze seemed chirpy.

If I was a witch, I woulda cursed everything in sight to a painful and slow death.

That's right, it was the asscrack of dawn on a Saturday, and I was awake.

Not by choice, however. But at the same time, the only explanation for the fact that I was currently sitting on the bleachers of the school field instead of in my warm comfy bed was that I'd brought myself here.

Lemme explain.

About half-an-hour ago, my good-for-nothing cousin broke into my house (the fact that I'd previously disclosed the location of my house keys to her is irrelevant). She made her way upstairs and quickly found my room, which she took the liberty of entering (it was unlocked, but that is also irrelevant). Then, she shook me awake and politely asked my semi-conscious self to accompany her to the school so we could watch Brandon's soccer practice.

According to her, I nearly brained her with my pillow. I'm a bit fuzzy on the details, but it seems legit. I expect I'd do the same to anyone who interrupted my precious sleep. She's just lucky I didn't grab the knife under my pillow and have a serious go at her. Perhaps I care more about her than I thought.

Instead of running for the hills like a sensible person and letting me go back to sleep, Sophie made her way downstairs and made cookies (Who the hell makes cookies at 6am? What a freak), came back to my room and held them above my nose. Again, according to her, I rose from my bed "like one of those charmed snakes in straw baskets that you see in cartoons" though I was still asleep.

The foodie in me apparently possessed my body. I got dressed with Sophie expertly guiding me by nose, then sleepwalked out of my house all the way to school where she finally handed me the cookie.

So yes, I was mad at the world. She basically kidnapped me, and the only explanation she gave for her hoodlum actions was that Lilith gave her advice on how best to "deal with me".

I'm embarrassed to call myself an assassin.

My scowl was nearly frozen in place when I felt a hand descend on my shoulder.

The devil in disguise herself grinned fearlessly in the face of certain death.

"Did you like the cookies?"

I chewed as murderously as I could, looking her dead in the eye. "They're delicious," I growled angrily around my mouthful.

"Thank you," she beamed. "Means you can't be too pissed at me, aye?"

"Would you like to bet on that?"

She chuckled nervously, but didn't scoot away or remove her hand. I turned away from her and towards the field, watching the football team's practice drills. They only wore t-shirts and shorts though it was already quite chilly outside. I hugged my sweater closer to myself in silent sympathy.

"Avalon, can I ask you something?"

I looked up at her. The way she said my name made it sound like a merry jingle, one I hated to admit I'd like to hear again.

I lifted my brows, silently prompting her to go on.

Sophie tore her eyes away from a certain blond player to return my gaze. Her Nutella-colored eyes held curiosity and some confusion.

"If you're a werewolf, doesn't that mean you're very strong? Why would you need me to protect you?"

"I never said I needed you to protect me."

"No, but you brother made it seem like you do. He looks pretty strong." She blew a strand of flame-colored hair away from her face.

"I wouldn't want to take him in a fight."

I gritted my teeth hard enough to meld them together. If I didn't, I was pretty sure I'd say something I'd regret.

Sophie tapped her fingers lightly against my neck. "A vein's bulging out over here." She angled her head, getting a closer look.

"Fascinating."

I bonked her on the head.

"Ow!" She whined in pained Irish noises. I watched dispassionately as she groaned and rubbed the injured part of her skull. My tightened jaw subconsciously started to relax.

"What was that for?" She griped.

"That was for kidnapping me."

"I thought we were already past that!"

"Never." I huffed scornfully and looked away. A moment later I felt a finger poke my cheek.

"You didn't answer my question. Thought I wouldn't notice?"

I narrowed my brows. "Why would I tell you anything?" My tone was as frigid as the cold seeping through my clothes. I'd meant to discourage her, but Sophie just plucked another cookie from the Tupperware container in her lap and pushed it between my lips.

I blinked at her stupidly.

"Take your time." She patted my head. "I'm not going to judge you."

She turned her attention back to the field, her eyes immediately snagging on Brandon again. If she was a compass, he was her true North. Her eyes had no problem locating him and followed him all over the field.

"So, Brandon huh?" I mumbled around the cookie in my mouth. I took it out and munched about half.

"You, uh, have a yen for him?"

A roguish smile tugged up her lips.

"I want him, yes. And I mean to have him."

Scandalized, I struggled not to choke. Clearly I wasn't prepared for such a blunt declaration.

Sophie pulled out a thermoflask from the bag at her side and handed it to me, not even bothering to hide her amusement.

I glowered at her, wiping my mouth on my sleeve after taking a swig of hot chocolate. "If you ever do anything to hurt that human bean, I'm bleaching your eyebrows beyotch."

She stared at me. "What?"

"You heard me."

She propped her chin on her hand, looking properly humored. "Are you going to warn him not to hurt me?"

I stared at her like she'd grown an extra nose.

"No?"

She let out a defeated sigh. "Good to know I have your blessing at least." She looked back at Brandon thoughtfully.

I studied her carefully. "Are you going to ask him out or something?"

"Yes," she said simply.

"Just like that?"

She looked at me. "What would I be waiting for?"

I felt heat rise to my face, and not from the cold.

"Well, I mean...usually the guy does the asking out, I think..." I mumbled, shuffling my foot.

"They take too long." She peered at me. "Would you like Rhys to ask you out?"

I violently shook my head.

"Aww." She playfully tugged one of my warm cheeks. "You're so cute," she cooed. "Just imagine if he kissed you. How horrible would that be?"

I smacked her hand away. "Stop!"

"So testy. Careful, cousin." Sophie leaned back on her elbows, letting her hair fall back. "He seems the kind who wouldn't take too long to get what he wants."

My heart thundered in my ribs. I had to set down the thermoflask since my hand was shaking too much and clutch at my shirt, suddenly finding it too hard to breathe.

"You like him that much, huh?" Sophie remarked with surprising gentleness when I finally managed to exhale.

I kept my head lowered, not looking at her. "Were...wolf," I mumbled.

"What was that?"

"Half-human, half-wolf. I have the genetic material of two different species swimming around in my body. I'm basically a freak of nature."

"No, you're–"

"I'm faster than a horse, I've tested it. I imagine I'm faster than all kinds of things. I heal almost immediately if I let myself, and I'm sure that means I'll probably live for very long. I'm...lucky. There are things humans go through that I'll never suffer from, things I don't even understand."

I looked up then, not at anything particular.

"I am very strong. I always have to be mindful of that. When I was six, I lifted the dinner table while my parents were eating because my fork fell to the ground and got stuck," I narrated numbly.

"So, yes, I can protect myself. And yet...I was bullied since I was nine. I'd let them break my bones and make me bleed, and after I picked myself up I'd go home to an empty house. For years, that was normal for me. I realized pretty early on that I don't fit in anywhere. Not with humans," my mind flashed to the first time my mom had seen my amber-gold eyes...the look of horror on her face, "Not even with other werewolves."

I thought then of Archer and Gavin, the family that had found me on their own terms. "I can't shift into a wolf, so I can't run with the others. I can't even fuck off to the forest with actual wolves. I question my existence every single day... yet still... I'm so lucky."

I gripped the bottom of my seat and squeezed. "All this power at my literal fingertips," the bleachers started to whine, "but I've never used any of it for good. At best, I've been self-serving with it, but at my worst... I get filled with hate, and the wolf in me wants to make everyone pay. It would be stupidly easy to do." I released the seat and raked a hand through my hair in frustration.

"But now I have people I absolutely cannot hurt. I'm scared that one day I'll snap and I won't know the difference. So your job isn't to protect me, really. Its to protect them and everyone else from me. And I guess, in a way, you're supposed to protect my soul."

My eyes fixated back on my sneakers. "So the way I am now, I can't get close to anyone...like that. Its too risky."

There was a moment of silence.

"Good God, the head on ye!" Sophie exclaimed in a rather thick accent once she could get a word in. She looked at me with eyes as blazing as her hair.

"Any eejit could decide at any point in their lives to kill someone! That's because people are big dumbarses, okay! And you've had shit luck, you dope head, don't give me that! I'm Irish, you nitwit gee-bag, so I'm telling you if you're lucky I'm the friggin' pope!"

Her chest heaved and fell like a ship caught in a storm at the end of her tirade. I blinked eyeballs as big as saucers at her while I waited for her to calm down.

Finally, she pursed her lips and grabbed my shoulders determinedly. I almost whimpered.

"Listen well, cousin. You cannot keep tormenting yourself over what you might or might not do. That's no way to live life."

My eyes narrowed. "Easy for you to say. Have you ever taken someone else's life?"

Sophie opened her mouth to speak, then suddenly deflated and looked away. Curious, I followed her eyes. What I saw in them was a well of torment and guilt.

"I... I think so. N-Next time, I'm sure I could..." she whispered.

"What do you mean?"

"When I was really young, some bad men tried to...hurt me. My dad protected me. That's why he's..." She let me go and shook her head hard, hair slapping her cheeks.

"But if they ever come for me again, I'll do whatever it takes to survive. My dad basically threw his life away for me. I have to keep myself alive so his sacrifice wouldn't have been for nothing. So I'll live! And I'll kiss that cute boy," she said with conviction, pointing at the innocent Brandon, "so hard his ears'll spin around!"

"Er, Sophie–"

"I won't live in fear, because I'm sure that's not what Da would want for me." She peered right into my face and grinned with so much joy and radiance that for one moment... I got caught... in the synchrony... of her hair and the falling autumn leaves. The wind blew back her locks almost lovingly and a strangle melody filtered into my ears as the strands collided.

"Don't worry, Avalon. I'll show you the ropes, so you could do it too."

The spell broke. I stared at her wonderingly for another beat.

"Brandon's...looking this way." I raised a hand and feebly pointed.

She immediately snapped her head to the side. Brandon was standing right in the middle of the field with the other players idling by or chatting with each other. Practice must be over.

When he saw us, he waved enthusiastically. We waved back.

Sophie stood. "I'm going to give him the remaining cookies. I'll be right back!"

I sat dazed and stared as she ran towards the field. I watched her charge towards him, completely fearless and... free. Decidedly so. I watched her meet him in the middle, and they immediately became a perfect collage, like their pictures had never been apart. I watched them until I couldn't take it anymore. Then I stood and stepped off the bleachers.

Music, I mused, walking slowly towards the school building. Why did I hear music?

Through the doors, I watched my feet as I walked in no particular direction.

'Music soothes the soul of the savage beast.' I read that somewhere. Who said that? I looked up at the fluorescent lights, wracking my brain.

Maybe it was Einstein. Or probably Shakespeare.

My feet came to a stop in front of the Music classroom. I stared at the door, a bit perplexed at my destination. Then I reached for the doorknob and twisted.

Locked.

I should just turn around and go back to the bleachers, I thought. Wait for Sophie and Brandon to stop making goo-goo eyes at each other. We can all go get proper breakfast later, where I'd be third-wheeling away while they flirted across the table.

I stared at the doorknob some more.

Go on without me, I typed, then hit send. I shoved my phone back into my pocket, then grabbed the doorknob and applied a bit more than average strength.

Click.

The door creaked open. Peering in, my eyes immediately locked on Sandy, my trusty piano. I closed the door behind me and crossed the space in three strides.

I reached the bench but didn't immediately sit. I stood staring down at the keyboard like it held all the answers to life's problems, or at least, my current conundrum.

"I won't live in fear, because I'm sure that's not what Da would want for me."

She'd sounded so sure, so... purposeful. She knew what she wanted from life and was prepared to grab it with her bare hands.

An uncomfortable sensation curled in my gut. I'd never bothered looking towards my future. For a long time, I hadn't even planned on having one, though that was out of the cards now.

So what did I want to do?

I was an assassin now, sure, but I couldn't do that forever. And, terrible as it may sound, I didn't find my job that much of a challenge. I thought I'd go to Yale and become a doctor like my parents, but...dedicating my life to healing humans? Now that I really thought about it, I found the idea offensive.

A doctor-assassin? An assassin turned doctor? It sounded like a broken joke.

I shook my head fiercely and started to pace while I thought.

What would my parents want for me? None of my dads cared either way, and I've never asked my mom. I couldn't turn to them anyways. It had to be something important, something I cared about that only belonged to me...

My pacing landed me right back at Sandy's bench.

Music... what drew me to music?

Its just always been there. Before... everything, and then after. During my darkest times, I was always able to find myself within a song. I'd hear the echoes of my screams when I thought I was all alone and gain a brief flash of clarity that Yes, there was a point to everything which kept me going.

The melodies formed a pillow that let me rest my tired head and absorbed the tears I cried in my sleep.

Music had basically been my support system before I'd had a support system.

But wasn't it more than that?

I ran my fingers over the keys, then tried to recreate the tune I heard earlier in the wind. It came to me easily, a bright, happy piece that the Seelie fairies could play at their revels.

I abruptly stopped, reining myself back in. I wasn't the realm of the Fey, I was in a slightly stuffy classroom. Somehow I'd just played myself into a different world.

How did I do that? What else could I do? And why could I do it?

Was this...what I could do?

If I grasped hold of all my potential and pounded it into the piano, what could I become?

It was like I'd stumbled onto the yellow brick road, and the path was lit up all the way to the Emerald city.

With my hands alone, I could make life limitless. I could make all the things I cared so much about now pointless.

I had to know more.

Mr. Franz found me on the floor, surrounded by music theory books and booklets of sheet music. I almost didn't notice him enter, too engrossed in the video I was watching. A man sat playing a piano a lit stage, his fingers flying so swiftly across the keys he made the notes airborne. His audience could have been packed with props for all the importance he paid them.

"Young lady?"

I held up a finger to shush him without turning around.

From the description, the piece he was playing was Chopin's Ballade No. 1 in G Minor, Op.23. Each note was so clear, even the ones he merely grazed shattered the space. When his fingers descended full-force on the keys, those sounds were earth shattering. And all the while he seemed adrift, on some lone floating island with just his piano, not caring about the havoc he wreaked in his wake.

It was the most badass thing I'd ever seen.

I felt like a limp noodle once the video ended. I was pretty sure I couldn't get up even if I wanted to. So I craned my neck backwards to look up at Mr. Franz.

"I wanna learn how to do that."

He peered at me over rimmed glasses with his usual disapproving look. He rummaged through his coat pockets for a moment, then produced a folded handkerchief and gave it to me.

Puzzled, I blinked and raised a hand to my face. My fingers came away wet.

"I see you've decided to stop wasting my time and being so stubborn," he remarked while I dabbed my cheeks.

"Hey! When have I been stubborn and time-wasting?"

He pushed his glasses up his bridge snottily. "You've never been anything else. That piece is one of Chopin's four ballades," he continued before I could complain. "It's famously difficult to master. It'd take years before you can even play it semi-competently."

"Years?" My eyes widened. "For just one piece? What about the other, uh, ballades?"

"Same goes for them."

Just what I'd been looking for – a challenge. I could feel my blood getting warmer.

"Woah. Do you think I could do it?"

"If I didn't, I would have already reported you to security for breaking into my classroom."

I reared back. "Geez." What a sourpuss.

"Shall we get started?"

I sprang up like my feet had wings.

"Yes, Master Shifu!" I saluted.

"Do not call me that."

I stifled a laugh as I took my seat on the bench and let Mr. Franz direct me on where to put my fingers.

Sorry, Rhys. Right now, I'm going to find something more important than you, since you've become the most important thing to me.

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I've rewritten this chapter about five times, and each time it changes drastically. I'm pretty sure my writing changes to match where I am at certain points in life, so I'm not really sure what this chapter says about me. Maybe that I watch way too much anime 🤷🏾‍♀️ This is the final draft I decided on, and I really had to force myself not to scrap everything and just post it this time to break the cycle I'd found myself in. Its also very different from what I originally imagined, so I'm as curious as everyone else where the story would go from here.

Sorry for taking so long to post, eh he he...

Lulu.

P.S - While writing this chapter, just for a fraction of a second while I was typing, it looked like I was playing the piano. It felt really cool.