(Part 11)

"Papa," Leon piped up, sounding uncertain but urgent at the same time. We turned to see the little boy tugging softly on his fake-father's shirt, hopping from one leg to the other, legs squeezed together. "I got to pee."

"Leon, you're big enough to go to the restroom by yourself." Sasha answered with a frown, but Vergil looked down at the poor eight year old.

"He is still unfamiliar with the layout of the hospital." Vergil excused, rubbing the top of Leon's head affectionately. "Come on, but let's make it fast."

I could not help but smile at the affectionate side of Vergil, almost forgetting the fact that we were arguing a few days ago. After passing out, I had woken up hours later to realise that I had been given a blood transfusion from Vergil to replenish my blood loss, and was kept for further observation. Even the doctors were perplexed about my condition, because I 'was supposed' to be totally healthy as a half-demon.

Through my hospital stay, Vergil had only gone home while I slept, and was always there when I woke up. We never spoke a word more about our argument, because at the crucial timing, where I was tired as hell every day, sick to the bones of puking and bleeding, I didn't want to lose Vergil. We could talk things out like adults after I got well.

If I got well.

Leon and Vergil were soon out the door in search for a restroom, leaving Sasha alone in the ward with me. Worriedly, she took the seat by my bed, leaning in close with concern clear in her eyes.

"Are you sure you feel okay?" She asked as if she could not bear for me to feel any uncomfort. So, despite the fact that I was still feeling very weak, I smiled, took her hand and squeezed it to show that I was still going strong. It wasn't a total lie, because I still had Vergil watching over me.

"I'm fine now. Don't worry about me." I answered, glad that we were having a rare girls' time –however short it was. Ever since coming back to Limbo, I never really had the time to sit down and chat with Sasha since she was busy with her work, Leon, and dating Killian. I, on the other hand, was busy being sick and occupied with Vergil.

"You can tell me that, but I'll still worry about you until you're well again." Sasha expressed with a pained expression, as if she was the one in pain to see me sick.

"I'm really sorry for causing so much trouble for you and Leon. Ever since Vergil and I came back, we've been hijacking your place without paying any rent..."

"Nonsense." Sasha grinned. "You're my best friend. If I can't even let you stay at my place, then what kind of a friend am I? Besides, Vergil used to take care and watch over both Leon and I without even caring about what he spent. He bought loads of toys for Leon and most importantly gave the boy a father."

"But he left Leon so young to follow me into my world."

"Leon is a sensible boy. A little too sensible for his age, but he got it from his father –his real father, I mean. My husband was a man who knew things, and accepted everything faster than everyone else. Besides..."

The fading off perked my curiosity, and I found Sasha smiling with amusement. "Leon told me that his friends thought that Vergil Sparda being his father was the most awesome thing ever."

I could not help but laugh at that. Even young children nowadays knew about the story of Sparda and his sons? I had no idea that Vergil was such a famous personality going on around –but then again, my boyfriend would never truly pay attention to such things. Vergil's life, before meeting me, had mostly revolved around completing missions, making money and supporting his secret family as well as taking care of his lazy twin.

"I think one of his classmate's father once hired Vergil for a mission. The little girl must have spread the rumours until everyone in his class knew about his father being an amazing demon hunter." Sasha continued with a grin, definitely amused by the adoration by young five-to-eight year old children.

"Vergil would be so embarrassed to hear about that." I replied with a grin.

The door opened, and the doctor, dressed all professionally with his white coat and stethoscope around his neck, stepped in.

"Miss Cartlier, we have the results from the blood tests." He announced, closing the door behind him. There was a strange glow on his face, a certain glow that doctors weren't supposed to have. I guessed it was a good thing, because I'd definitely rather he be glowing than looking like he were about to deliver a death sentence.

"What's wrong with me?" I asked, sitting up straighter.

"Your blood contained traces of something unnatural, but after cross-checking it with Mr. Sparda's donated blood, we concluded that there was little cause for worry. However, as for your sickness..." He looked down at his clipboard to make sure, then looked back up, meeting my eyes with a smile.

"Congratulations. You're pregnant."

My world stopped for a long moment.

"Excuse me?" Sasha broke the silence in my stead, most definitely taken by surprise as well. "Could you repeat it again?"

"Miss Cartlier is pregnant. We detected surprising levels of progesterone in your blood –even more so than normal humans. I did a check-up for you yesterday, and I heard more than one heartbeat. By my best estimate, you've been pregnant for a little over three weeks. The date of your conception could range any day between five weeks to three weeks ago." The doctor explained, still maintaining that healthy glow on his face as if he found nothing wrong.

I mean, of course he thought it was a blessing for women to be round with child. It was supposed to be a blessing for me.

But it wasn't. It was my worst nightmare at the moment.

"When can I get an abortion?" The words escaped my lips before I could stop them, and it definitely turned off the smiles. Sasha spun to look at me in utter shock, but my focus was on the doctor's faded smile. It quickly melded into a deep frown.

"It has to be within the first trimester of your pregnancy." He informed, but still held a frown. "Are you sure about this?"

"I..." I wanted to say that I was sure about it, but the thought of doing something so inhumane was crazy. But... Vergil didn't want any children. He didn't want an offspring he called his own, and I didn't want to lose him... No matter what sort of argument we had, I knew that I needed to be with him. I couldn't survive without Vergil. But could I survive knowing that I had killed my own child?

"No!" Sasha spoke up for me, jumping out of her seat. "No, she's not sure about this. I will talk to her. Thank you so much, Dr. Stein."

The doctor nodded, as if knowing that there was more than met the eye. He was in no place to judge the plight of his patient, and thus he simply stepped back.

"Please consider about this carefully, Miss Cartlier. It would be best if you consulted your boyfriend or husband about this." He advised, and was out of the door in the next moment.

I think I drifted out of my body a bit afterwards, still reeling with the utter shock. Pregnancy was supposed to be something to be celebrated over, and yet here I was, considering abortion almost immediately upon receiving news. What kind of a woman was I?

A woman who was deathly in love with a man who didn't want a child.

Sasha's worried calling of my name was interrupted when the door opened again, and I dimly realized that Leon came walking back into the room alone. His word spoken to his mother didn't really register in my head until much later afterwards, when Sasha had sent him out once more with his cane.

"Mama, is Miss Leah pregnant?" I think Leon asked from the door with bright curiosity when he walked in. Sasha reacted quickly by jumping up and pulling the boy in, closing the door behind him after making sure that no one had followed behind the boy. Where Vergil was; we weren't sure.

"Leon, you must pretend that you never heard what the doctor said, okay?" Sasha warned her son carefully, but there was no way to utterly keep a curious child in the dark.

"But why? Miss Leah is going to be pregnant and give birth to a baby, right?"

"Just listen to me. What are you doing back here? Where is Vergil?"

"We forgot to take my cane." Leon answered brightly. "Papa is waiting at the end of the corridor."

Sasha must have heaved a big sigh of relief, but at the time, I was too zoned out to notice.

"Is there something wrong with Miss Leah? Why is she so quiet?" Leon asked innocently, and I think Sasha gave me a worried look –which I didn't react to at all.

"Listen to me, Leon. You must not tell anyone about what you heard from the doctor, okay? Especially from your Papa. He cannot know about this. We will tell him when the time is right, but you cannot tell him. Do you understand me?" Sasha warned strictly, and Leon looked a little scared. Still, the obedient boy nodded.

Sasha passed the cane over to the boy and sent him back outside. "Remember what I said."

Making sure the door was closed carefully behind him, Sasha ran back to my side, shaking me to get a reaction once more. I jerked back to reality to see my best friend looking at me with utter worry.

And I broke down in tears.

_____________________________________________________________________________________

The young boy made it to the end of the corridor, and met his father waiting there. Once more, they made for the direction of the restroom.

"It took you quite some time to get your cane." Vergil commented. "Did you walk into the wrong room?"

"Mmhmm... Huh, what?" Leon asked, obviously thinking of something else. The worry and urgency that had been in his mother's tone of voice had scared him a little, but he didn't know what to think about. He had always thought pregnancy was something to be happy about, wasn't it? When he was six, one of his teacher had been pregnant. She had sounded so happy and had even bought the entire class sweets to celebrate.

But why didn't Miss Leah sound happy about it? And what was this 'abortion' thing that she asked the doctor? The doctor had replied in a manner that made it sound like a bad thing, and his mother had rushed to speak up for Miss Leah as well. What was wrong? Didn't Miss Leah like children?

"Leon? Are you okay?" Vergil asked again worriedly, not sure why the young boy seemed to out of it for the moment. Leon had always been an open, outgoing and friendly boy. To have the boy frowning at something, being quiet and introverted, it was a rare occurrence that Vergil wasn't sure spelled for anything good.

"Oh? Yes, I'm good, Papa!" Leon rushed to say, but he couldn't see Vergil's confused frown made at him as well.

Then Leon decided to ask his father about it, in the most unrelated way possible. He could be asking, pretending to be curious about something, couldn't he? He didn't have to tell Vergil that Miss Leah was pregnant.

"Papa?" Leon asked, one hand holding on to his father's, the other still using his cane to navigate. "I passed by a room just now, and I heard someone say something. What is 'abortion'?"

Vergil wondered how the young boy had been passing just a random room close enough to hear the words. Had the young boy really embarrassed himself walking into the wrong room? It could explain why Leon seemed so out of it. Then again, no one would ever blame a blind boy for walking into the wrong room.

"Abortion means to take out an unborn baby from a woman's stomach. It happens when a woman doesn't want a baby." Vergil explained in the simplest way possible, not really sure why he was answering the boy so honestly. Then again, Leon had displayed to be quite an intelligent boy, and there was always no harm in education the young boy even further.

"But why would a woman not want a baby?" Leon pursued. "Isn't being pregnant something that people celebrate about?"

Vergil shrugged, but Leon could not see it. "Some people don't want to have children in a family. Some people don't have the money to raise a child. There are many different reasons, but it is always their choice to go for abortion or not."

Leon paused for a long while, trying his best to pick his way through his questions. He knew his father. Vergil might have missed his life for five years, but one month back together with his father made Leon remember how smart his Papa was. Vergil could make connections quickly, and Leon fought with his brain to come up with questions that couldn't lead Vergil to the answer.

"Does Miss Leah like children?"

Vergil paused, the argument from days ago rushing into his mind all in a moment. The strength of her words, the height of her anger, the fierceness of her demands. Leah had never really been a person who asserted her will, particularly when it came to things concerning him. Leah had always let him do his things, trusting him to think for the best of both of them. But in the argument, Leah had been so sure of her stand.

He couldn't blame her –he had already seen the extent of her adoration of children of all ages. Back in the Human World, she had been an active volunteer in her university days helping out orphanages and offering tuition lessons to the less privileged middle schoolers.

"Papa?" Leon asked, a little worried at the silence coming from his father. Had Vergil connected the dots and found out that Miss Leah was pregnant? He had just promised his mother that he would keep Miss Leah's secret not long ago.

"Leah loves children. She adores them, like how she adored you when she first met you." Vergil answered with a sigh. While it was hard for Vergil to accept loving children with all his heart, he had watched Leah adore the children at the orphanages. She had been so happy, so cheered up at the thought of interacting with them all.

But it was different if they were talking about their own children.

"What about you, Papa? Do you like children?" Leon pursued. The young boy was having troubles understanding the adults' way of thinking. If Miss Leah loved children, then why did she want to get rid of the baby in her stomach?

Vergil hesitated once more, thinking furiously. Did he really not like children? He would admit that he never had a burning preference to the younger generation, but Leon had made him feel... complete. Even though Vergil was never a true part of Sasha's family –not officially –but Leon had always made Vergil feel part of it.

Was making a family like that with Leah something that Vergil wanted very much?

Did he dare to believe that they could watch their children grow up happily like Leon? Did he dare to believe that he could be a good father to them? Vergil knew, and could acknowledge honestly, that he had been a bad example of a father to Leon. And yet, somehow, Leon had still loved him like a real father.

Vergil's imminent reply to his 'son' was interrupted when a young girl ran into him and fell backwards on her butt. Years younger than Leon, the young girl looked up at Vergil, clutched tightly to her teddy bear, and began to cry.

And yet Vergil thought she was rather cute.

Leon was quick to calm the young girl down with jokes and a caring heart, and as Vergil watched, he realised that maybe he didn't hate children as much as he initially thought. They were beautiful –each and every one of them. While bringing them up had to be a mess, but it was still a type of journey. Sparda and Eva was never able to watch him and Dante grow up due to their circumstances, never able to completely be part of that journey.

But that would never happen to him and Leah; Vergil swore to himself strongly.

He would never let Leah separate from him, would never let any children they have grow up on their own the way he and Dante had. He would never want to experience the same things his parents did; to disappear from their sons' lives until they met him again, all grown up. While he still loved his mother and father, where had they been while he struggled with own demons?

Maybe Leah was right. Maybe he had been thinking too much, being too much of a coward. He didn't want children because he didn't want to get hurt. He didn't want to bear the thought of his children growing up without him and Leah.

But if he intended to stay with Leah for the rest of her life, why wouldn't he make her happy? It would be a torture to her if he adamantly refused to have children for fear of being hurt.

Vergil reviewed on the things he said to her back in the park, most of them spoken in his fit of indignance and rage.

Even though they hadn't been talking about it since Leah was admitted in the hospital, Vergil made up his mind to talk to her about it soon.

To tell her that he'd changed his mind.

That a child or two was fine.

As long as their child didn't turn out like Dante –but that was something he would make sure.

_____________________________________________________________________________________

The first thing that threw Vergil off his stride when he and Leon returned to the ward was the sombre atmosphere that somehow seemed to be hanging over the ladies. The second thing that grabbed his attention even more was the fact that his lover's eyes were red and puffy.

Both women tried their best to smile at their arrival, but Vergil knew immediately was something wrong.

"You were crying?" Vergil was quick to ask. There was only two ways this thing would go. Either Leah would tell the truth or...

"Oh, it's nothing. Something went into my eyes." Leah's reply confirmed something: something was wrong, something that she was keeping from him.

"Miss Leah, are you sure you're okay? Do you still feel weak?" Leon was quick to leave Vergil's side, scampering to climb up the side of Leah's bed.

"I'm fine." Leah could still smile despite so blatantly lying to him. Vergil hid his frown, stepping forth. What had happened that his lover could not tell him so?

She said that you were not happy, and that I shouldn't be afraid to tell you the truth. She said I was going to be scared about something, but I had to love you and trust you.

Lily had told her to not be afraid, and still Leah was appearing to lose faith. What was so dire that she could not tell him? What was it that scared Leah, something that stopped her from loving him enough to trust him?

"Vergil?" Sasha's voice jolted him back to reality, and he realized that he had been frowning down at the women unconsciously. The scared expression on his lover's expression spoke for so many words that for a moment, his mind was wiped blank. Something was scaring Leah; something that she was scared to tell him. He needed to find out about it before she went crazy keeping her secret. He needed to tell her that whatever it was; he would be there for her.

"Sorry, I was thinking about something." He excused quickly, wiping the frown off his face hastily.

"Did something go wrong on the way to the restroom?" Leah asked curiously, quick to momentarily forget whatever that was plaguing her. That was good; she was too busy thinking about something else to fret over her problem –whatever it was.

"Nothing much." Leon spoke up for him. "But there was this little girl who accidentally walked into Papa when we were going to the restroom! She sounded very cute, and she said she liked me."

"A little playboy at the ripe age of eight, huh?" Leah grinned at the young boy as Vergil remained silent at the other side of Leah's bed. He was glad that Leah was looking the other way, leaving him out of the line of sight as he did his best to remain in reality.

But it was hard. It was always hard to know that a lover was keeping secrets. It was harder to know that it had something to do with Leah's fear of the secret. Leah feared the secret, and feared his reaction if she told him. It had to be something that he didn't like, something that he expressed dislike about.

"Vergil?" Leah was the one to bring him back to reality this time, a soft hand placed over his. He blinked, seeing the plain worry in her eyes. Was there pain in those eyes? Was there fear? "Vergil, what's wrong?"

He couldn't do this.

He could survive once being controlled by Mundus. He could kill Mundus. He could plot to destroy a demonic government. He could chain Mundus back to Hell. He could go running between worlds for his lover.

But he couldn't do this. He couldn't pretend that nothing was wrong. Leah might think that he was easy to lie to, but he saw everything. Vergil usually prided himself for his heightened observing skills in solving problems. This was the one time where he didn't want to be observant. He didn't want to catch the small hints from his lover that she was scared, that she didn't dare to tell him anything.

He couldn't do this.

"I'm sorry, I think I need to be somewhere else at the moment. I'll be back later." He excused, and before his lover could say something weak to stop his departure, he ducked out of the room.

He knew he shocked not only Leah, but also Sasha and Leon. He had never left his lover so abruptly before, definitely not while she was sick and weak. But he couldn't do it. He couldn't pretend to be the worried, unknowing boyfriend at the moment.

Something was bothering Leah.

He needed to find out what it was.

Lily. Lily knew the answer.

But how was he going to contact Lily, when she was right inside Leah?