[A/N] Trigger Warning for trauma fl*shb*cks in the second segment. Take care, all. Your health and safety are most important.

Fujiko, August 6th, 8:03 pm

Not counting the rest of today, we only have two days left in here. I'm completely positive that this isn't the end for us, and I feel like we'll totally still see each other afterwards, even if we live in different prefectures. But I wanna make sure I spend time with everyone beforehand. Especially since I know at least a couple people are seriously struggling after everything that happened today. Having to eat leftovers from stuff that Tozen made while he was alive was really hard on everyone. A bunch of us cried into our food.

I ring her doorbell, and, after a while, she opens. Her eyes are puffy and red, but it looks like she's trying to keep it all together. "Hi, honey. Are you okay?"

"Greetings, Fujiko. I am... not, but I am sure that is exactly what you expected."

"Can I do anything for you?"

"You needn't fuss over me so, Fujiko. I may not be alright but I am still capable of tending to myself."

"Well... could I do your makeup? Or just, like, make you feel special? You've been through way too much and I wanna do whatever I can to help you relax."

She finally smiles. "You are a kind soul. I shall take you up on that offer. Preferable to allowing myself to languish alone."

"Good to know my company is better than whatever languishing is!" We laugh. "You don't need to come to the beautician's or anything. I can bring stuff to you." She nods, so I fetch my goodies and she lets me in her room. I, like, can't even really describe how it feels in here. The room is just super duper calming, but somehow, it's like I can feel her sadness in her room. She allows me to wash and tend to her face, eyes closed. For a while, neither of us say anything, but then she chimes in quietly. "So. It is you and I at the end. We are the last remaining women. As melancholic-- er, sad-- as it is, at the very least, I am glad we are alive."

"Mhm. There were a lot of wonderful girls here, and now it's down to just two. Honestly, I miss them. They were all so completely different from one another, but they were amazing and beautiful and unique," I ramble, remembering everyone's faces.

"I always have gravitated more toward boys, but the ladies, from the small amount of time I spent with them, seemed completely remarkable. And you are correct. The ways in which they carried themselves, the values they held, the ways they expressed their emotions... all completely individual and distinctive. People are like snowflakes," she muses.

"Yeah. And there's, like, no right way to be a girl. You can be feminine in tons of different ways. Like, you and me, we're not the most drastically different girls in the world. Like, yeah, I have more enthusiasm and you have way more wisdom and grace, but we both like softer sort of looks and we both really need strong relationships in our life in order to feel happy. Some of the girls weren't like that!"

"Indeed. Wakumi was essentially my antithesis in every way, and we did not often get along as a result. Yet she cast all of that aside and rescued us without so much as batting an eyelash. Though her brashness was overwhelming at times, she had a relentless courage and unwavering conviction."

"Mhm. Wakumi could drive me nuts at times, but we wouldn't be alive if she didn't turn on the Mastermind last minute. Another person who was really different from us was Nari. Ooh, she was so gorgeous but she kind of scared me a little. She was just so cool and mysterious!"

"Ren still speaks of her often. The fondness in his tone, the way he expresses how free-spirited she was, it all makes me think she must've been a wonderful person beneath the icy exterior. And perhaps that was the point. The people who pursued friendship with her despite her coldness must be remarkable indeed."

Another pause in the talking happens as I pat her down with foundation. "Sayuri was way too smart for me. Her head was always going a million miles per second. I didn't always get what she was talking about. But I always knew SHE knew what she was talking about."

"She was a never-ending font of curiosity, to be certain. Her willingness to hear all facets of an argument and her rigorous way of analyzing everything was admirable, if perhaps a bit excessive. Hachi was the same way. Though I could never truly follow what was going on in her head, she was very receptive to new things. May I... talk about myself? Just a smidge?"

"Totally!" I agree, sweeping blush along her cheek.

"I... have discovered, through this process, that I have been arrogant. I came into this situation believing that I was in a state of relative emotional stability. I thought, because I was among the eldest, and because I'd lived through much, and because I meditated, and because I was so focused on balance, that I had the right answers. I thought I was wise, that I had so much to teach everyone, but I needed to learn just as much. I was caustic and stubborn on more than one occasion. But the lessons I needed were beaten into me nonetheless. It would have been far less painful had I accepted them willingly, however, I am here now."

"Who... did you feel you learned the most from?"

"In terms of the women? Perhaps Joanie. One of my many regrets is that I did not spend more time with her. I initially wrote her off due to her cynicism, but she had much insight on acceptance, mercy, and understanding."

"Mmm... she was amazing."

"You know... I rarely spent time with Kana... If it pleases you, would you perhaps... share what she taught you?"

I smile sadly. "Okay, honey. Here's my oral presentation on why Kana Omori is one of the coolest people I ever knew."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Yuu, August 7th, 9:48 am

"Dare bowl, dare bowl, dare bowl!" Ren chants, slamming his fists on the table.

"Do you never get tired? Normally, you need to take time to yourself and process everything."

"We won't be here in a few more days. I can process it when I get home. Now's the time for stupid shenanigans. Y'know, it could be a good distraction."

"Why am I always the one getting dragged into the shenanigans? It's literally always me. I had to make melon instruments, and I got interrogated bad-cop style by Fujiko about my hair routine, and I had to steal a cupcake like a super spy for Sayuri, and I lost the code game because Keiji told me to fuck myself, AND Wakumi spat on me twice!" I rant. I'm not actually angry. In fact, I'm smiling. But damn, life has been absolutely fucking absurd since I got here.

Ren, feeding off my energy, cackles. "See? It's tradition at this point! More shenanigans for you! Let's get a bowl and fill it with dares and do a bunch of dumbass dares!"

"This so isn't my sort of thing! Can't we just play card games or something? Let's play Mousetrap! You roll your dice, you move your mice. Nobody gets hurt," I play.

He snorts. "Get the fuck out of here with your VeggieTales references, memelord! If you actually don't wanna do dares, I won't push you, but yeesh!"

"No, it's fine," I sigh overdramatically, "Let's do the dare bowl."

"You're amazing!" he beams. "Let's get the others to make dares for us!"

After doing that and experiencing my anxiety starting to spike from the unknown, we mix the dares all around and begin the game. Ren grabs the first once. "Ew. Put salt on a slice of watermelon and eat it."

"Who wrote that one?"

"Fujiko. This is for sure her handwriting." I can't help myself but laugh as he begrudgingly goes to prepare it. He brings it out for me to watch him do it; no chickening out or trying to fudge it. He shuts his eyes and brings it to his mouth. He recoils in utter horror, and I can see him consider whether or not to spit it out.

"If you swallow the bite, I'll say you succeeded despite not finishing the whole slice," I challenge. He shudders and keeps his mouth shut by force. I watch as he makes himself chew and swallow.

"That was atrocious! But I won, suck it, take your damn dare!" he cries out victoriously.

I stick my hand in the bowl and pull out a dare. Eat a cookie that's been on the ground for fifteen seconds. I scrunch up my nose bitterly. "Chimooooooon," I huff. Ren peers at the paper, concerned, and then busts up laughing. "Fifteen seconds is so lonnnnnnnng!" I complain, hopping a bit out of nerves.

"Ah, time to put your bravery to the test, my dear germaphobic friend! I'll even do you a favor and bring you your cookie. I hope it's as sweet as you are," he winks. He retrieves a cookie and sets it gently on the floor. "You're like a dozen homemade cookies." I quirk my eyebrow up, expecting the punchline. "You're hot and I need to take you out for dinner." I sigh in exasperation. "Sorry. Still not down for it?"

I smile. "I can deal with the pick-up lines. That's just the way the cookie crumbles." He makes an unimpressed expression. "If you get to flirt, I get to pun. That's how this works."

"Deal." After that, he counts for a few more beats and then nods. I take my gloves off and hesitantly reach for the cookie. Icky, icky, icky.

"I'm more afraid of infected wounds than this. This still sucks. But, after all this shit, not like a cookie's gonna kill me." Interestingly enough, a mild worry about poison supersedes the worry about germs-- a lasting result of being held in a killing game for roughly half a year. Even so, after everything I've been through, this should be manageable.

It... should... be... And then suddenly, it's very, very not. I can't pry my brain away from the image of Keiji swollen and rashed and dead, all because of my food, all because of some parsley Sayuri snuck in it so easily, and then I'm yanked back into the memories of seeing her shredded and bleeding from thousands of cuts and then to-- THERE'S NO WEAPON! KANA, I'M SORRY! Is she breathing?! Is it possible to save-- There's blood pooling in her mouth. Holy shit. Holy shit! I'm a murderer! Fuck off, you damn hallucinations! "It's not real! I'm okay!" I plead, trying to ground myself.

"Yuu. Yuu, it's me, it's Ren. It's your friend Ren. We're in the dining hall right now. It's January seventh, it's just the two of us, and you're safe right now."

Tozen's leaving. Shit, grab the wet wipes, grab the wipes, I have to clean it up!

"Yuu, can you hear me? Do you know who I am? I'm gonna need you to indicate yes or no, if you can." I force myself to nod. I can hear you, Ren. "Good. Do me a favor and open your eyes as soon as you're able." Monterio's dea--?! I wrench my eyes open. "You're doing amazing. You're safe, Yuu. You're safe here with me. Tell me any colors you can see."

"Purple, lime green, black, white, lots of different browns. Um... burgundy, orange," I list them off frantically.

"Good, good! Take some deep breaths for me. I'll do it with you." We begin to breathe and I follow his lead. Sometimes he says something comforting. Eventually, I'm fully back in the present. The carnage of the cookie that I absolutely destroyed while unaware is staining my hand, so I go to wash it.

"I thought..." I sigh, "I thought I was finally brave, and finally okay. But I just spiralled because of a damn cookie. I was eating fine, I don't know why this happened!"

"Yuu, this is trauma. You just had an actual flashback. Being brave has nothing to do with it. And you ARE brave, dude. You saved everyone's lives by being brave when Zu and I were fucking around and making a mess of everything with our doubt. But dealing with everything you've dealt with... of course there are gonna be scars."

"How did you know how to handle that so well?" I ask, biting my lip lightly.

"Ugh, I worry that this is gonna come across as ingenuine." I wait for him expectantly, and I hear his chains jangle slightly. "We all read about it after the fourth trial, just in case you ever needed our help. I'm sorry for dragging you into this stupid dare game."

I open my mouth to say something and find no words. I dry my hands, slip my gloves back on, and sit down next to him. We sit there quietly for a minute. "Do you... need anything? Or want anything? At this point it's kind of too late for me to make anything particularly time-intensive. Oh, since we're not gonna be here in a few more days, I could help you pack stuff. I just--" My words splutter out.

"I understand. You're welcome, and I'm glad we were able to make things a little better for you this time. Help packing would be great."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Chimon, August 7th, 12:24 pm

"I know it can seem kinda formulaic and dull... and that's kind of what you sign up for with Monster of the Week type shows... but I liked this anime a lot when I was little! I'd watch it with some of my older cousins. I like how, after each battle, she has to change a little bit. The manga only has 19 cards, and the anime has 52, so obviously they padded it out, but I was always excited to watch!" Gou rambles enthusiastically.

"It's cool that the screening room doesn't just have movies. I'm excited to watch some shows and stuff!" I declare, spinning around in my seat so that I'm dangling upside-down. My hat falls off my head onto the floor and my hair hangs low.

"Yeah... all things considered, this wasn't the worst place to get held hostage. As awful and traumatic as all this bullshit has been, I did make a handful of good memories." He moves to slip the DVD into the player. Outdated? For sure. But, for all the things we did have, wifi was not one of them. For obvious reasons.

The blood rushing to my head starts to make me dizzy, so I upright myself. "I agree. Like, there's a playground, a pool, a theater, a karaoke machine... and our responsibilities are way different than the real world. We kinda made our own tiny society, in a way."

"Do you miss your home, Chimon?" he asks, plopping down into the seat next to me.

"Mmm... maybe not as much as I should. But a little, for sure." For some reason, my answer prompts him to take a short, agitated breath. I try to catch his expression, but I can't get a good look from the side since his helmet is covering it. Soon, though, he turns back to me with a delighted beam as the theme song for the anime starts. He stands up on the chair and starts singing excitedly, all the words committed to memory, and he uses a few other chairs to dance. Eventually, he reaches a hand out to me, so I take it and stand up myself, bouncing around. I don't know all the words; I have never watched this anime, and I don't watch much tv in general. Even so, I find myself laughing and having fun with it.

We watch this show for at least two hours-- Gou's overwhelming enthusiasm winds up riling me up and getting me semi-invested even within the first small handful of episodes. Each time the theme song rolls around, we dance around the screening room. It makes me feel like a kid... in a good way, of course. "Hey, Chimon?"

"Yeah?"

"What do you feel is the difference between an adult and a kid?"

"Well, brain development. The prefrontal cortex doesn't fully mature until age twenty-five, so we're all still kids."

He snickers. "Do you have a less fact-based answer?"

I close one eye and think deeply. "Hmmm... I guess, based purely on a personal view, an adult mindset needs self-awareness, or at least a willingness to explore both good and bad parts of yourself. Becoming an adult also involves coming to a point where you can make choices different to what the authority figures in your life want, not for the sake of being contrary or rebellious, but because you think the different choice would be better for yourself and others. To summarize, being an adult involves having a distinct sense of self and choosing to act on it for positive reasons. My definition obviously won't work for everyone-- that's why it's easier to be factual and talk about brain science-- but that's what I think."

"Do you feel like an adult?"

I snicker. "No, not even remotely. Where are all these questions coming from?"

"I dunno. I guess I've just been feeling like a total kid lately... Can I admit something to you?"

"Of course."

"You guys have all... changed a lot, since we got here. You, especially. You don't cry anymore, like you used to, and you stopped trying to... I dunno, look frail? Nowadays, you're really honest and active and playful. Everyone's at least a little bit different, but most of you are SIGNIFICANTLY different. And if I'm being totally transparent here, it overwhelms me a bit. I don't feel... like I've been able to change a lot. I worry that I'm immature, and that I might not be the person you guys need me to be yet."

Ah, I see. So that's the sort of issue he's been hiding. "You don't need to worry so much about that. Change is one of those things that isn't always so dramatic and big. Sometimes, just living day by day, you don't notice that you're gradually becoming a completely different person. It's sort of like me and my growth spurt-- I'm a little taller than I was when I first got here, but I didn't start noticing until my feet could touch the ground when I sat. Maybe you are different, and you just haven't noticed? Or maybe you're just where you need to be right now. None of us think you're not enough. You're the person we 'need,' whatever you mean by that exactly. We all rely on each other, every day, and I think we've gotten way better at covering for each other's weaknesses."

"But, I feel like I've just gotten swept along. Like, you know sink or swim? It's like, all of you guys are learning how to swim, and I'm just getting lucky that the waves are keeping me afloat."

"Well, obviously you know I do hypnotherapy, and though I know more about the hypnosis aspects, I do have a decent grasp of psychology. There's this thing called reframing-- where you take all of the information available and make a different, more positive conclusion based on it-- and it might be helpful to you. If you feel like you haven't changed too much, that would mean the situation didn't force you to adapt a lot. That could mean that you were already significantly better built for it than the rest of us were. Think about it. Your physical strength is an asset. You're assertive without being overbearing. You seem to handle your stress better than a lot of us. You're genial, and you're flexible enough to come up with some out-of-the-box ideas. You're doing just fine, Gou."

He seems to take some time to process it and let it sink in. "Okay. I'll try to think of it more like that... do you wanna start the episode over?"

"As long as you don't skip the intro!"

He gasps, pretending to be offended. "I would NEVER!"