[A/N] Mild trigger warning for c*r cr**h*s in the second scene (nobody gets hurt)

Tozen

I sit down in my chair, which is now a machine, and stare at Monokuma expectantly.

"Puhuhu! Excellent! You're prompt as always! I'm almost giddy to try this out!" he cheers. He spins a big wheel, and it turns so quickly that staring nearly makes me dizzy, like a childrens' carousel that I would always fall straight off. Eventually it slows to a halt. "Fifteen! Oooh, that's fun!"

"Is it mine?" I ask nervously.

"Try it out and then you tell me!" The capsule shuts around me, and then suddenly the capsule is gone as an entirely new world spreads out from the center and fills my vision. I can even feel the sunlight and the slight breeze. And though I know, intrinsically, that I am me, it feels like I take upon a character. I highly doubt this is my fear.

I stand at the doorstep of a house I don't know. I feel like I was expecting the place to be bigger, more lavish, but it's a humble place. Not a wreck or a falling apart shed or anything, just a normal house. There's a muddled blend of hesitance and destiny in my heart, like I was born to stride right in there. I grit my teeth and clench one of my fists. And with the other hand, I twist the knob and throw the door open.

"It's me," I tell them simply, "and it's time."

The people-- a couple holding two small children to themselves tenderly-- are ones I distinctly feel that I've never met before. Yet, it feels like they are fundamentally vital to who I am. The little ones are even less familiar, like, despite the fact that I know next to zero about the couple, the children have nothing to do with me. Speaking of them, their mere existence takes me entirely off-guard, like my balance is thrown and I'm falling.

"Tozen... we're so sorry. We weren't ready. We were scared, and young, and stupid.. And that could never excuse what we did, and we could never possibly hope to make it up to you, but we've never stopped thinking of all the wrong we did to you. It causes us so much pain, and yet we know that it could only be a fraction of what you've had to deal with."

This is someone's worst nightmare? Wouldn't some people dream of such a heartfelt apology?

And yet, in this simulation, I can feel it. The heaving in my chest, the wavering of my convictions, this one goal that I've single-mindedly held for my entire life slipping through my fingertips like sand. What was it all for? What was any of it for? What am I for, if not for this thing that they're robbing me of?! They're stealing something important from me AGAIN!

"Tozen!" someone yells. I swivel my head to look. Weirdly enough, it's a well-known nutritionist whose books inspired me in the past, so I can only assume this is supposed to be some sort of mentor figure. He looks at the scene unfolding before him, sees my reluctance, and I'm struck with a deep-seated shame. "Tozen, we have to go. So either do what you came to do, or give it up. I can't be the one to make that choice for you, but whatever you decide, it has to be fast."

"HOW?! How am I supposed to choose?!" I scream. "I worked so hard, waited so long, only for them to try and weasel their way out of this with fucking pity?! How was I supposed to know there'd be kids here?!"

The kids are acting adorable, asking who I am and playing with my suspenders and giggling as the adults look on with regret and concern. I command my knees not to shake or buckle, trying to convince myself to just do it, just fulfill my goal-- whatever that is-- and be done with it forever so maybe I'll finally be happy. This was supposed to give me everything I wanted. And it feels like time stops, like I'm in one of those choice-based video games where I can't go anywhere or do anything until I make a decision. I'm locked in limbo. And yet it feels like if I don't choose soon, I'll be endangering someone. An eternal grip of mortification and panic makes my brain whirl around manically. And then I'm ejected.

The capsule flies open and so do my eyes, and I'm back in the same awful building I've been in for months. "Wooooah, that's fucking whiplash. I feel like I might be sick." One of the Monoinu offers up a bag. I consider it, but ultimately opt out, woozily standing up. I'll make myself something with ginger to soothe my stomach. Before I leave, however, I turn back to the bear. "Did nothing open up after the last trial?"

"Oh, it did!"

"But the stairs aren't unblocked."

"Figure it out!" he sneers. "You're a smart low-fat cookie, you can crack it."

On autopilot, I drift to the kitchen and make myself a smoothie with carrot, turmeric, and ginger, trying to puzzle out too many things at once. Whose fear was that, and what did it even mean? Where are these new accessible rooms? How am I supposed to keep skirting past the issue of romance when now they both sit right near me for every meal? God, how did we even get to where we are? With pressures mounting on every side? At the beginning, I was just excited for a development program. All I wanted was to learn!

That's it! The beginning! I gulp down the rest of my smoothie and rush to the trapdoor that leads down to the Warehouse. I scurry down the rope ladder and try out the heavy metal door that Azumi and I failed to open when we'd first met. It takes a small bit of effort, but it opens for me. There's a hallway with a bunch of new rooms! We unlocked the basement! I channel my inner Gou and zoom back up to the main floor, frantically ringing doorbells and explaining my discovery and receiving compliments for my cleverness that make my heart swell with pride. Looks like we've got some investigating to do! The adventures of Tozen on his own can be just as valuable as the adventures of Tozen and Friends!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Wakumi

I launch the door ta the meetin' room open so wide that it nearly comes off its hinges. I slam me foot on the table-- it's really more o' a routine by now than boilin' rage, 'specially since we have ta report here e'ery day fer the indefinite future. The soft chair squishes as I leap on it. "Aight. Spin yer fuckin' doohickey, Monokuma."

"With pleasure!" 'e confirms, whizzin' the wheel. It settles. "Four!"

I grunt. "This wheel rigged or somethin'? I'm not down ta get hornswaggled, ye hear me?"

"Whatever could you mean?"

"Got this one three outta the four times so far. N' it's clearly Ginny's."

"Not rigged! You can go around asking everyone else, if you're unsure," 'e grins wickedly.

"Nah. I don't need the help o' those pathetic whelps. But if this goes on much longer, ye'll be fish bait."

"I'd be careful not to put your threats into action, or you might find yourself severely outmatched!"

"Just fuckin' plug me in, dammit!" 'E waves ta me n' the capsule snaps shut, launchin' me back inta the house. I open the door 'fore it can e'en ring, just ta see what'll happen.

"W-Wakumi," the woman slurs. It's one o' the older girls in me crew, who isn't first mate cause she can't listen ta directions. "It's... time ta go, get yer fuckin' shtuff n' letshhhhh go already. 'M takin' ye h-home. Alsho... I dunno if I'm jushtttt... dreamin' it, or if ye opened up 'fore I rang. Did I ring?" she asks, blinkin' in utter bewilderment. Ah, so it CAN react ta us... hell, that's kinda impressive!"

The familiar fear n' desperation fills me heart as it pounds. I slam the door shut n' run upstairs as the crazy wench starts ta bang on it. "OL' SALT! I NEED YE! SHE'S TRYNA TAKE ME AWAY! I DON'T WANNA GO WITH 'ER!" I scream, runnin' up the stairs ta the master bedroom. But the front door flies open n' 'fore I know it, she's snatchin' me wrists as me Ol' Salt screams at 'er.

I struggle 'gainst 'er, but she shows me that she has legal papers fer custody o' me. I'm practically wrestled inta the tobacco-filled car. The helplessness as she drives through the night, watchin' me shot at a better future-- nay, a future at all-- get smaller n' smaller, is strong. I'm gonna die a miserable wreck.

All these emotions are annoyin', but then, Ginny was always somewhat dramatic. Course 'er greatest fear would play out like a movie.

N' then I get a crazy as fuck idea. Like a movie, ay? The door's locked tight, but there's more than one way outta a car. I take the first aid kit at the bottom o' the car and slam it inta the window repeatedly 'til it gives, n' throw meself out. It fuckin' hurts, like I broke a couple o' bones, and I've slashed meself up with glass n' pavement burns. E'en so, the car swerves 'round, n' the back end nails itself inta a tree. Holy shit, I'm really doin' it! This wasn't how this is normally s'posed ta end!

I run, tryin' n' failin' not ta limp, as quickly as I can. The sound o' the pavement under me sounds like it could be real. But then, a roar sounds out, n' the woman morphs inta a fuckin' horrific creature, n' e'en though I know it can't hurt me actual body, I'm fuckin' TERRIFIED! I don't say that lightly! Bad idea! Bad idea! It grabs me with what should prolly be the equivalent o' a limb, n' then me capsule bursts open violently.

I snatch the barf bag from the Monoinu n' make use o' it, pantin'. "FUCKIN' SHIT!"

"Well wasn't that fun?! We DID account for anyone trying to break the scenario too much!"

"Phantom pain is a motherfuckin' bitch, ye barnacle suckin' sadist," I groan, waitin' fer the dull sting in me legs ta fade completely 'fore leavin'.

How much o' a bitch do I wanna be today? Ehhhh... I said I wouldn't cooperate, but I also said I wasn't bout ta get in anyone's way, n' I feel like withholdin' this information would be considered gettin' in their way. "AYE, YE  LILLY-LIVERED PANSIES, GET YER ASSES O'ER HERE, I GOT SOME FUCKIN' INFORMATION FOR YE AND YE BETTER FUCKIN' LISTEN WELL FER YER OWN SAKES!"

"Agh! What?! What is it?! Info on WDR?! Or a way out?!" Yuu yells, scramblin' o'er ta me. Azumi zips o'er gracefully right behind 'im. She starts hollerin' fer the rest o' the group, n' when only Gou n' Ren join, she dashes off ta find the rest.

"Sorry ta get yer hopes up, but me information is related ta the simulations. Ye can push the boundaries a wee bit, but if ye try too hard ta break it, it pushes back n' gives ye somethin' just as scary if not more. I tested it out on scenario four--"

"The one with that freaking drunk woman dragging us off?" Chimon asks.

"Aye. When I got shoved inta the car, I shattered the window n' took the plunge. The car crashed but then the woman turned inta a practically indescribable demon. Also, ye can feel pain in the real world due ta it, but it goes away."

"What the fuck?! How complex IS this thing?!" Gou yells. "Also, I know what I'm NOT doing if I ever hit scenario four!"

"Do we know whose that is?" Tozen asks.

I consider tellin' 'em, but in a combination o' spite toward 'em n' respect fer Ginny's privacy, I keep me lips shut. Dead men tell no tales, and I may as well join 'em in their confidentiality.

"We should start a list with clues. Has anyone found their own yet?" Fujiko mentions.

"Would anyone feel okay sharing even if they did?" Yuu asks, cringin' lightly.

"I'd tell mine!" she retorts. Aside from 'er, though, the air fills with an uncomfortable silence. "Alrighty, that's a-okay! We should just focus on narrowing down the people we've lost, then. I think it's important to make sense of it so we can figure out as much information as possible!"

I scoff n' turn away as they start sharin' shit. I did me good deed fer the year, time ta go back ta sword fightin' in the trainin' hall."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ren

The pod opens up and I fling myself out of it immediately, running out of the room without a single word to Monokuma. God, my hands are clammy, and my heart is pounding, and my throat feels achy, and my arms still kind of hurt. I leap into my room and hide under the covers. I know that's a very childish reaction, but it just feels safer to be all bundled up. "Mom!" I call out, even though I know she can't reach me. "Moooooooom!" My mom may be overcautious and stifling, but she was always the one keeping me safe. I've been doing really well taking small steps to try and overcome my fear, but that just sent a hell of a shock through my system. Hot tears fall uncontrollably down my cheeks.

I gasp and then jump out of bed, dragging my comforter across the hall with me-- my bedding is due for washing anyway. "T-Tozen? Azumi? Anyone? I need hugs!" I call. I even make my way all the way down to the new gym, aka Tozen's new second favorite place in the building (the kitchen will always win). I have to leave my comforter at the top of the trapdoor, because climbing a rope ladder sounds impossible with that thing wrapped around me. Sure as day, he's there, killing it on an exercise bike. Yuu's here, too, doing squats with a bar. "Tozen!" I yell, partially distraught and partially delighted.

"A-Ah! Ren! S-Stop, I'm all sweaty!"

"I don't freaking careeeeee! Take me into your beautiful ripped arms and tell me everything will be okay!" I beg overdramatically.

"Did something happen? You look like you were crying," he asks, pausing momentarily to let me hug him. "Also, I'm not ripped, I have very average amounts of strength."

"F-Fuck you, man. If you're average, I'm a f-fucking noodle," Yuu contradicts, struggling. But then his expression drops. "Shit, w-was that offensive? I need to learn how to hold my tongue."

"You're fine. Ren, could you toss my water bottle to me?"

"Pour it over yourself!" I encourage, sniffling.

"No, I don't think I will," he denies playfully, taking a drink. A timer goes off. "Ah. It's your turn to take him."

"Finally! I'm never coming in here again!" Yuu announces.

"You're coming here again tomorrow."

"Oh, God." His face is meek, intimidated, and his fear reminds me that I'M still very scared. Even with a crush pick-me-up, I'm still not doing great. I feel like cowering away from the garden forever and ever, like remnants of the panic attack are creeping up on me. Where I didn't even get to eulogize--

"YUU. I need to do something, and I feel like if I don't do it now, I never will, and I really need you to indulge me here," I plead.

"I-- I don't have a choice, but I'd have said yes anyway, I guess!" he affirms, looking increasingly more bewildered. I practically fly through the hall, up the rope ladder, through the other hall, and I stop in front of the garden. "Here? But it's two, the sun won't set for at least three hours! Also, was that your bedding at the trapdoor?"

"Yes to the bedding. And yes, I-I know, that's the p-point," I mention. "You and I, we're gonna face our fears together right fucking now, and we're going to eulogize them like we couldn't before."

"DUDE, you had to spring this on me out of nowhere?!"

"Look, the wheel hit my own fear today, okay? I'm... I'm really not okay, but I feel like I'm strong enough now that I can just DO this. No backing down. I'm gonna spend our whole watch in the sun, starting with this. I'm just gonna grab my sunscreen out of my room. C'mon."

"You guys are just trying to put me through the ringer today, huh?" he sighs, following with tiny steps. I exchange my earring for Nari's to gather her strength, lather myself in sunscreen, and head out. The tingly feeling arises quickly, and I hop around to shake out any nerves. My chains jangle. I run over to the willow tree. Yuu follows, quickly falling to his knees. "I don't wanna be here," he admits, hesitantly stroking Kana and Monterio's yin-yang boxes.

"Me neither. And that's exactly why we need this," I beg. He wordlessly nods, hugging himself and squeezing his eyes shut. It's autumn, so the sun isn't super harsh or hot, but I know that temperature doesn't have anything to do with UV rays and/or sunburns. This is such a bad idea. "I'm here today to express my feelings for the late Nari Igarashi. Nari was a force of nature, the same nature that she adored. She was strong-willed, quick-witted... though she didn't often express her joy, her compassion was still obvious to me. She was sharp and intuitive, and that made her sensitive to the needs of others, even if she was blunt. She inspired me to really enjoy every minute of my life, and she reminded me how big the world is. If the Earth can spin 1.6 million miles a day, we tiny people can accomplish a hell of a lot, I think, even if nobody knows it," I say, rubbing the triskelion earring for as much comfort as I can manage.

"Sayuri Asai," he starts, shuddering, "was one of the most interesting people I've ever known. She once compared herself to a housecat." He chuckles a bit at this, and I can feel some of his bitterness toward her fading. "Curious, intelligent, mischievous, and a bit bad with people. But frankly, though she had a tendency to ask intrusive questions, I don't think she was bad with people. She was eloquent, understanding, and surprisingly playful. All she ever wanted was for people to feel safe enough to be authentic, so that she could come to understand them. And... and she must be so disappointed in me," he cries.

"Dude, dude, no, she's not. You... were finally able to do it. You were able to say it."

"So did you. Look at you, man. You're out here standing in the sun, hardly afraid. You're way braver than me."

"Look," I beckon, showing him how badly all of me is shaking. "I'm just as terrified as you. In fact, I came to the gym for comfort hugs and I kinda still need more."

"Agggghhhhh, you are just on a mission to push me as far out of my comfort zone as possible today, aren't you?"

"What do you mean?"

He, very slowly, somewhat awkwardly, wraps one arm around my shoulders, and then the other, bringing himself in for a loose hug. I hug back, still quaking. "If I'm honest, Yuu, I think we're all just cowards working our hardest to overcome it all."

"Well, shit, at least I'm not the only one," he jokes. We laugh a bit. This is awful, but also... very liberating.

I'm coming. I'm almost there.