[A/N] So much music research just for like seventy to a hundred words' worth of content. But honestly, I don't regret it. I apologize if it still sounds ridiculous and like I have no clue what I'm talking about. I hope you enjoy regardless.

Tozen

"We're all eating dinner together. No more of this meal shift bullshit. I don't even care if it's healthy today, we've been through too much," I command.

"My appetite is all but vanquished," Azumi murmurs helplessly. "You will excuse me, as I must decline."

I gently tilt her chin up so that she's forced to look at me. "No, I won't excuse you. None of us have eaten for... nineish hours, and I won't be letting any of you waste away to skin and bones."

"Tozen..."

"I'll keep bothering you until your answer is yes! And that goes for all of you!"

"I can help cook!" Fujiko squeals.

"I—Uh—"

"Fujiko, we're gonna turn this into a party, so I need your help with decor," Gou delegates, rescuing me from having to make sure the building doesn't burn down.

"Oh! Okay then! We'll make the place look real pretty! The parlor, right?"

"Yep! Ren and the dancers, you choose music."

"On it! We'll be sure to enchant you all," Ren winks.

The dancers give each other a wary glance, having just abruptly ended a month-long fight. But then Monterio takes her hand with more confidence than expected, and she brightens up. "You're not allowed to load up on dozens of love songs, you doof." Kana insists as the three of them leave together.

"Umm... what else do we need for a party? It's been so long since I've actually had a party," Gou clicks his tongue.

"I'll get some board games from the game room!" Chimon volunteers eagerly.

"Umm... I think I just need to be alone for a while... but you can call me when everything's ready. I'm not intending to be a total hermit or anything." Yuu gives us a smile, but it quickly falters as he slinks away.

Wakumi flips one of her braids, expression mostly unchanged from the start of the trial. "Aye. There's nothin' fer me ta do since we ain't got stuff ta make grog. I think I'm gonna go huntin' fer loot in the shop."

I take a breath, and my shoulders sink. "Okay. Okayokayokayokayokay. You can pick what we make. My one requirement is that dessert absolutely HAS to be mochi ice cream. Whenever we talked about food, Bisque ALWAYS looped around to how much he loves the stuff. That sound good, Zu?" She stifles a bit of a gasp, and I suddenly realize what I just did. "Shit, I'm so sorry! I— I didn't mean to take his nickname for you, it just kind of came out that way!"

She squeezes me tight and starts to sniffle. "How are we going to DO this, Tozen? He stole my heart so quickly, and now it feels like he took a part of me with him."

"We have to live day by day. If we look too far in the future, it'll overwhelm us for sure. So tonight is all about tonight; we can deal with tomorrow when it comes."

"But it's terrible knowing that none of our days will have him in them anymore! I— I had this daydream all the time where we were able to get him home safe and sound, and he'd introduce us to his real parents, and we'd get to be part of his life. And I was fully aware that this was a delusional, silly wish, but to know that it's truly, irrevocably shattered to pieces...!" I start to feel her slip to the ground, so I sink to meet her, and suddenly we're on our knees and I'm cradling her head. To have such a pure-hearted daydream is something I can barely fathom, and it makes me angry. What right does our captor have to destroy something so uncorrupted? A muddy blend of grief and fury fills my heart as I let her cry into my chest.

"Someday, they'll know the pain that they've inflicted on all of us, alive and otherwise. We'll make them pay for the future they stole from him. From Hachi, Nari, Keiji, Sayuri, Joanie, AND Bisque. And until that day comes, we just keep standing back up. We can take as long as we need to recuperate, but I believe in our ability to get back up, over and over."

"I need... five minutes. Then, at the very least, I can assist you and stay presentable long enough to have this party."

"Honestly, I don't think you have to worry about looking presentable. We're all just fucking messes anyway," I laugh through my shaky breaths. Her giggles can be heard over her tears.

"Being here is constantly feeling like those few milliseconds when you're distended in midair, not positive that you'll stick the landing."

"Oh God. Is it like that feeling in your stomach when we're plunged down several stories for each trial?"

"Yes, yes, yes!" she laughs, letting go of me so she can wipe tears out of her eyes.

"Okay, Azumi, what are we making for dinner?"

"Um, can we have pierogies?" Her eyes are lighting up ever so slightly.

"Pierogies it is."

We cook together as she tells stories about her circus to fill the empty air. And when it's done, we bring it to the party. It's a whole different feeling than the first party we had. Fujiko isn't flittering around the room chatting it up like the little socialite she is. Though Ren is obviously still flirting, he isn't seeking each person out to shower with pick-up lines. Wakumi isn't charging in with an irrational amount of aplomb. And people are missing. But there's harmony. Kana and Monterio made up quickly, and she's curled up half-asleep next to him. Fujiko styles hypothetical outfits and the makeup looks she'd do for them as Kana drowsily nods and Chimon plays shogi with Monterio. Gou and Wakumi are testing the waters when it comes to play-fighting and Ren keeps getting distracted from songwriting by them occasionally rolling into his bubble. But he's laughing. We rescue Yuu from his social awkwardness, since he's stood in a corner wide-eyed and sipping juice for a solid five minutes. And even though nothing is alright, it's nice to pretend it is.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Chimon

I'm so fucking glad that these bedrooms are sound-proof, because it would be extremely weird for people to hear me laughing my ass off a day after this all went down. I'm losing my goddamn mind over this. My captor must be either amused or extremely worried. I hope they're both.

We're going to go recover his backpack in about an hour, to see what sort of presents he gave to us. I appreciate the fact that he thought enough to get us something, but I don't appreciate it nearly as much as the present he didn't even know he left me.

I fucking feel something. It's tiny. It's so, so tiny. But when I was forced to be the one to say it, I actively didn't want to. I was upset! I was upset for another person's sake! And it's been twenty three hours— it's six in the evening— and I've been able to keep it there! It's still there!

God, why can't I be a normal person who's sad for their friends' deaths and not extremely pleased that I could even nab a scrap of real freaking affection for a person? Okay, I probably just need to be grateful for where I'm at instead of grumbling about my situation again.

Haruto was... the first person I met here. And at first, I just thought he was an earnest little idiot, but that's not it. He wasn't something for me to toy around with and use. He was that type of person you just can't be numb to. Excessive cheeriness is something that I usually don't respond much to. Neither is affection-seeking balls of fluff. But I suppose those two things combined with a startling amount of maturity did something? Or maybe it was the fact that he was what I pretend to be? Do I aspire to be that, or am I purely projecting it based on practicality?

Maybe I'm a fool for actively trying to analyze my obviously abstract emotions. But if I understand it, maybe I can replicate it, so I guess I'm just getting way too desperate and clinging onto this lucky break with everything I've got.

It's just luck. These are just flukes. Shut the fuck up, Chimon, you've felt more genuine attachment to people this past month than you've felt in actual years. Stop trying to dismiss that.

The doorbell rings, and I put on my mask. "Hiya! What's up? Almost time to open the backpack," I greet before even processing who's at the door. Monterio nods, and I let him inside almost automatically, despite the fact that he's never been in here before. I've come to learn that you can tell whether he's in a chatty mood based on his first reaction. If he gestures, he probably won't say much. If he talks, he might even choose conversation topics. "So is today the day you two hooked up for the cameras and can stop hiding it?" The corners of his mouth curl up and he nods contentedly. He leans up against my wall and sinks to a sitting position. I decide to tease him a little. "So how good was the kiss again?"

"THE KISS WAS SO GOOD," he affirms emphatically, opening his eyes wide for only a few moments.

"How long have you wanted to do that?"

"I don't even know, man. I didn't realize how bad I wanted her till I realized I could've possibly missed my chance."

"How badly do you wanna talk about it?"

"I don't wanna talk but I get riled up when you ask about it," he smirks. His leg is bouncing, an indicator of his enthusiasm rapidly escalating.

"Okay, then I'll let you calm down. You can watch me do some ayatori! I'm very used to keeping myself entertained, so I've gotten pretty good at it!"

I take a ball of yarn out of my drawer and cut so that I have multiple strings of different lengths. With the short one (the one that wraps from my hand to my elbow only once) I mess around with some of the more basic shapes. I basically speedrun a star shape, which of course comes after the cup and saucer form. Then I start to use some of the longer strings and do some intermediate forms, like a fish trap and a Jacob's ladder, before really going all out and showing off with a hammock and similar types of weaving. Monterio watches, transfixed, so I give him a length of string to try it out with. He only manages to get hopelessly tied up, tongue sticking out in concentration, but the failure only makes him laugh.

"You'll get better over time," I reassure him, and the words take me by surprise. Cause it implies that I think he'll keep going with it. Meh, whatever. He gives me a smile.

The doorbell rings again, so I peek my head out. "Helloooooo?"

"It's time. C'mon. We'll go get the backpack, and the MINUTE that twenty-four hours pass, we can finally see what's inside," Gou announces, running in place. Monterio hoists me up and I barely even react. I'm almost annoyed at how used to it I am at this point.

After Yuu grabs the backpack from Haruto's room, we converge in one of the many meeting rooms (not the meeting room of horror, Meeting Room A). We watch the clock until it ticks past seven pm, so that the backpack AND its contents count as one memento, and then we open the bag. It's full of pieces of pottery. Each one has a label with one of our names on it. "Shit," Yuu grimaces, blue eyes looking mournful, "so that's why he was asking about that. He already knew he was gonna... goddammit."

"There are tiny little notes for each of us at the bottom. Oh! It describes what the piece is!" Azumi notices.

We all grab our piece and and note. My piece comes in a little pouch, so it must be awfully little. Makes sense, considering I am awfully little. I open the pouch.

Wait... marbles? How did...?

I check the note frantically. "These are called, 'Homeward Bound.' I brought a bunch of soil from my yard in case I got homesick, so I wanted to use some of it on you. I gave some to Zu, Tozen, and Yuu as well. So these are made of that and also some clay. Sorry if they're not very pretty; I'm an amateur with marbles. But anyway, you dropped one a long time ago and I figured you were into them. Your marble is also in the pouch. I think it captures how you seem to be easily contented. I hope you like it! ^-^ -Bisque"

I open the pouch even wider. Damn! I was sure I'd never find that! Not only did he find the lime green and teal lutz marble I lost a while back, but he made marbles for me from very personal materials. They'll surely have low market value, but thinking about the sentimentality that he put into them makes me internally vow to treat them with the same care as my others.

Thanks Ha— My brain automatically corrects itself. Thanks Bisque.

I have to stifle an incredulous giggle.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ren

"This is called, 'Radiance.' Now, the colors may not be as bright as you expected, but that's because the glaze has a really special quality; it changes color depending on whether you're in fluorescent light or sunlight. As soon as I got to know you, I thought of this stuff. It might be a fun challenge! But take as much time as you need, okay? I don't wanna push you past your limits :o Like you, it's very unique and flashy! I also added these little dangling chains with ceramic hearts at the mouth of the jar cause all the kindness in your heart is constantly spilling out for everyone to see! I hope you like this a whole bunch! ^-^ -Bisque."

I'm sitting in the garden, under the safety of the pagoda. It's like four in the morning. I figure I can just stay up and watch the sunrise. It would be my first time doing so, and I'll probably leave right afterwards, and I have my sunscreen at my side, but I'm trying this again.

"Hey, Ikinari, it's me. Sorry for not visiting the garden often. You know. Sunlight. I'm trying to write music for you. Well, it kinda shifted from just you to all of you guys. If you can hear me, listen and maybe give me some divine inspiration. I'm gonna warm up first."

I do a hammer on and pull off on the second string fifth fret, and then the seventh fret with my third finger, et cetra et cetra for the legato exercise. Y'know, to get the blood pumping so that my fingers are limber. I do a few rolls, as well, going through all the strings. And then I do a string cross exercise, putting effort into making sure each finger responds independently of each other. This is my daily regimen. I don't usually do it at this time of day, but well... these aren't typical circumstances, so fuck it.

"So I know I want to do this in a minor key. I'm thinking A minor. Or— Or maybe F sharp minor. Somewhere between sixty and seventy-five beats per minute. Mmmm... F sharp minor chord... E natural major chord... D natural major chord... back to E... shit, am I just writing Pachelbel's Canon in a different key? Everything is Pachelbel's Canon. C'mon, brain, work with me! You can pump out dopey love songs all day, but when it's time to get really emotional, you just spit out the wedding song?"

I set my guitar tenderly on the bench and walk a short ways, so that I can let myself fall backwards onto the grass with an overly dramatic thump. "Maybe I'll have better luck with the lyrics," I sigh.

"When the warmth leaves us... and we're left to frost and freeze... we reach out to feel the sun... and it grants us peace with ease. Though sunlight makes me anxious and it brings me to my knees, your soul is what I'm looking for; don't rip it from me please. Okay, okay, good. That's decent. That's at least a starting point."

"The warmth of a hand, the warmth of a heart, slipping through my fingertips— was it there from the start? Just keep me in your mind and keep your mind alive... I'm not very good at swimming, but into the depths I'll dive. I plunge my hand into the sea... just to keep you here with me."

I take some time to just be quiet. I can hear the wind whipping across the dome; it's late September, so Autumn should be starting to sweep in. It's a little cold. Maybe I should've brought a blanket or some tea or something. But honestly, it's kind of nice. I close my eyes and think of all the times I would sneak out of my house at night. I can imagine the texture of the blackout curtains as I pulled them back from my window, the gentle rustling sound of the shrub as I set my foot into it, the prickles as I struggled to reshape it to its normal form. Sometimes I would stay in the safety of my backyard. Sometimes I'd go to a highway to watch the city at night. I was never brave enough to do this, but I always wanted to go to Ashi Village. I've heard the stars there are beautiful. I don't know which prefecture Nari lived in, but I'm positive that she had favorite spots to look at the sky.

She and her family could just... go camping whenever they wanted, in broad daylight. She probably hiked up really high to go cloud watching. "Hey, Ikinari? I'm sorry if you ever felt like I idolized you too much. I probably did. I worry that I never really saw you for who you were. I saw you as like, this powerful, daring woman who could do everything, BE everything that I wanted to be. I know, in my head, that you were incredibly scared being trapped in here. Maybe I could've helped you calm down. Maybe I even could've talked you out of the plan if I had just looked beyond my needs for a minute. I'm trying to be more like you, little by little, but it's difficult. Cause I don't even know who it is that I'm chasing. I only knew you for like a week and a half, and I'm starting to forget things, here and there. Just... if you can hear me, know that I'm doing my best. Everyone is doing their best."

I open my eyes and sit up. OH! There it is, peeking up just above the horizon. I rush back to the pagoda, lather myself in sunscreen, and take the pot with me. I watch the rising sun closely, like a curious kid meeting a scary stranger. I'm kind of jittery, being honest, and not in an entirely unpleasant way! Just breathe. You can handle this. The pot's pale yellows and greens go neon, as bright as me, and the little hearts burst into hot pink. "I'm doing it. I-I'm doing this."

The tingling sensation starts to cover my skin. Breathe. Breathe. It's okay. The tingles turn to my skin crawling, so I shortly realize that it's time to GO. I grab my stuff and head out, thrilled out of my goddamn mind because I went out there and nothing bad happened at all.

"I'm coming," I verbalize. Where am I going? "I'm coming to where I oughta be," I answer myself vaguely. Welp. I don't know where that is yet, but that's good enough for me.