Arriving at the warehouse insanely early wasn't as necessary today, so I enjoyed a bit of extra sleep before getting ready and heading out. I did get there with enough time to clean up the mess from dinner last night and to take care of the technology I'd left behind - but it was far less work to clean up than to set up.

I was in my customary place when everyone arrived, ensuring I looked and acted as aloof as always.

I may be a bit rattled, but I have a part to play.

Ivan and Aleksandr walked in first today, moving quickly with strained looks on their faces. They both slowed and relaxed when they saw me, though, and I looked at them fondly with a small smile and a knowing nod as if to say 'I'm okay.'

They both nodded and moved with a purpose toward the pallets, outpacing everyone else enough to give us a few seconds alone before we'd be joined by the others. I flipped down to meet them without hesitation.

"Dame!" Ivan rushed forward, grasping both of my upper arms and running his eyes over me as if checking me for injuries.

I chuckled, and placed my hands on his chest, walking forward and pressing into him in the hopes to calm him. I'm surprised when he wraps his arms around me firmly, but after a moment I allow myself to relax into his embrace.

For a moment, I almost feel safe.

When I pull back, I place a hand on his face and look deep into his blue eyes. His face relaxes, and when he breathes out a long exhale I can almost see the tension physically leaving his body.

Then I look to Aleksandr, not sure where he and I are as far as greetings - but he takes the guess work out of it when he rushes forward the moment Ivan steps back and wraps his arms around me as well.

"Don't... do that again," he growled, and after a moment's hesitation I leaned into him the same way I had Ivan in an attempt to convey calm to him as well.

I better be careful, or at this rate I'm not just at risk of falling for one Russian...

When his arms loosen, I step back and study his hazel eyes for a long moment. I wonder if he's into trans masc people... shaking that thought out of my head, I quickly walk back to my usual spot as I hear the others closing in. I take a deep breath, roll my shoulders back, plaster my smirk firmly in place, and lean against the pallet just as the others enter the space.

There are some confused looks between us for a moment, but everyone finds their seats and we dive into the meeting without incident.

True to my word there are no folders, laptops, or anything else provided today - just the table, chairs, water, and pallets stacked high with sandbags as cover if we need it.

I've placed all the hardware and equipment back into the lockbox for Connor - an offering since I don't want to risk returning them to WKTA but I also don't want it all to go to waste. I'll pay Mel for them - she'll know better than to ask questions - and Connor makes out like a bandit with some new tech.

Win win for everyone.

Instead, it's Victor and Aleksandr who lead this meeting, having brought laptops and tablets for everyone. I accept my tablet and sit in my chair as they begin to go through the people they've chosen for the team. It takes no time at all to iron out the exit teams, with Denis as both the driver of Team One and also the exit teams' first in command. Team One is next, and the five they chose for that team seem solid.

It's when we get to Team Two, the distraction team, that I get very, very concerned.

"You can't be serious?" I spit, glaring at Ivan and Aleksandr.

"You didn't really think you were going to leave us behind, did you?" Aleksandr chuckled, raising his eyebrow in amusement.

"You cannot take both the Pakhan and his second on a job like this! What happens if you get hurt?!"

"We'll have a guardian psycho to make sure that doesn't happen," Ivan said casually, earning a couple of chuckles at the table.

I am not amused.

"It's too dangerous and you two are far too valuable to be on a job like this!" I hiss, trying to focus on the logic and not the fact that my heart is in my stomach at the thought of them being there when so much could go wrong.

I don't miss the look of confusion Boris, Victor, and Denis are all giving me, their gaze moving between me, Ivan, and Aleksandr. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to see this isn't a normal interaction between a paid assassin and the leaders of their mob.

"We're going, Red, so pivot your focus to how you're going to make sure we all get out alive," Aleksandr says, eliminating any room for argument.

I'm absolutely fuming, glaring between the two of them as they smirk at me as if they've won something - as if my losing isn't them taking a chance with their lives.

Don't they have anyone else they can send? They've got money and skilled staff other gangs could only dream of, and they're going personally? Are they mad?!

"Okay, seriously," Denis finally speaks up, looking between us confused, "who are you? Like really?"

I ignore him and sit back, fuming.

"You shouldn't take the risk," I grit out between my teeth, before shaking my head and getting up to grab a fresh bottle of water.

I need to get myself under control - I'm literally shaking in frustration.

Aleksandr ignores both me and Denis, and continues talking with the others at the table - moving through the rest of the details and logistics about the team members who have to be notified tomorrow. I hear Ivan's chair scrape as he stands, and his footsteps as he comes up behind me. I'm still seething so I don't turn around when he's standing directly behind me.

"You know, if anyone else questioned me during a meeting like this, I'd kill them to make a point," he muttered, his hands landing on my hips as he pulled my back against his chest.

"You shouldn't go, Ivan," I whispered, trying to keep the panic down, "there are too many unknowns. I can't guarantee everyone will get out alive."

"I know. That's why we're going, meelaya. We're not just pretty faces, you know."

My breath catches... did he just call me... no, I must've misheard...

"But you do have very pretty faces, and you shouldn't put them at risk," I try, scoffing.

It's clear the attempt at humor is strained. I'm choking on the panic at the two of them coming. I never imagined they would be so fucking reckless... and... I suddenly realize I'm just as worried about Aleksandr as I am about Ivan. It takes me off guard but I quickly push it away.

"Are you going to tell us who he is?" Ivan quietly murmured into my ear, referencing the text last night.

I shook my head slightly.

"Don't try and change the subject," I mutter, leaning back into him, "You better not get hurt or I'll kill you myself."

He laughed at that, placing his face into the crook of my neck.

"As you say, mon zlyushchaya lisa," he said, still laughing.

Sighing heavily, I finished my water and turned around to look up to meet his gaze. I can't change his mind, but man is this a bad idea... rather than continuing to argue though, I just study his face and let myself get lost a bit in his eyes.

Seeing those eyes for the first time in the alleyway feels so far away now...

"Why did you have to run last night?" he asked, rubbing his knuckles gently down my cheek, the humor fading from his eyes as worry returned.

I pressed my lips into a thin line, wishing more than anything things could be different... that I still had a heart left to trust him with... because I'm starting to think I... maybe... possibly... could want that.

I've lost my fucking mind.

"It's a long story, sexiness," I finally said, shaking my head, "C'mon, let's get back to them before they really start asking questions."

"Oh, it's way too late for that," Ivan chuckled, but released his hold on my hips and let me walk around him to get back to the table.

Huffing, I sat back down but held my tongue. Aleksandr gave me a knowing nod, amusement still clear in his eyes, and I just rolled my eyes and scoffed at him. That earned me a chuckle as Ivan sat back down beside him.

It was much earlier than the last two days when we wrapped up, having finalized the plans. That may be the fastest plan draft, especially for a job of this size, I've ever been a part of.

Here's hoping that's not because we did a piss-poor job at it...

I stand and walk back over to chug another bottle of water as the others pack up and start to head out.

Part of me wishes it was something much stronger... these men make me need to drink.

I feel someone approach me and a chest presses to my back, and I instantly know it's Aleksandr.

"Come to the club tonight," Aleksandr murmured quietly into my ear, his lips grazing across my cheek as he pulled away.

I spin slowly, looking up into his hazel eyes.

His eyes twinkled as he looked at my lips before returning his gaze to mine. An invitation or a promise? Then, with a sly smile he turned and followed everyone else out before I had a chance to respond. I caught Ivan's gaze as he followed Aleksandr out, and the smirk on his face told me they were both in on Aleksandr's little proposal.

Ohhhhhhh, dear...

Standing alone, listening to everyone else leave, I can't help the slow smirk that makes its way across my face.

I mean... after this job I'm leaving them behind... so... just a little more fun couldn't hurt... right?

Yeah... just this last time... as a goodbye.

That may have been my mantra the whole way back to the safe house.

And while I showered and got ready.

And when I walked in to the club sporting a very similar look to the last time I was here.

I didn't expect it to be Ben that noticed I'd arrived first, though. I'd walked in and gone straight to the bar, ordering my usual and convincing myself it was a good idea to have come here... that this isn't an absolutely terrible idea - like every single other time I've allowed myself to make a terrible decision with regards to Ivan.

"You're back!" Ben's voice drew my eyes as I sipped on my drink, sitting on a stool at the bar and relaxing.

"Ben," I nodded in greeting as he made his way toward me through the crowd.

I spied Misty peeking out from the 'Employee Only' entrance at the back of the bar where dancers were going in and out, and I gave her a small nod as well.

"Have you reconsidered my off-" he began, looking very excited.

"I have not, I'm afraid," I cut him off, chuckling, "but it is nice to be remembered."

His face falls, but he's not one to give up easily.

"How could we forget? We had people asking about you for days after your last performance, and you weren't even on the stage for a whole hour," he says, his smile returning quickly.

He grabs the stool beside me, sitting just a little too close for comfort but not too close that I have to kill him and risk causing trouble for Ivan.

"Hell, you even caught the big boss' attention. I can only imagine the private show went well since you were up there for hours," he said, smirking in a way that only emphasized his sleaziness, "Given how you looked when you left here, I think your... services... would be appreciated in many ways here."

When his fingers grazed my knee, bile rose in my throat and I moved to break his fingers. Possibly his wrist, I hadn't decided yet.

I didn't get the chance though.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing," Ivan's voice registered seconds after Ben's hand had been forcibly removed from my knee and bent into a very unfortunate angle that left him squealing like the pig he is.

"You shouldn't touch what doesn't belong to you," Ivan growled, his face so close to Ben's that I know Ben could feel his breath.

It's a miracle Ben didn't piss himself.

What he did do is manage to sputter a bunch of nonsense that sounded like an attempt to explain himself, but he couldn't get two syllables together so I couldn't be sure. Whatever he did manage to say earned an even angrier response from Ivan, though, who moves forward and grabs Ben by the collar, practically growling at him.

Aleksandr walks around Ivan and nods at me, a smirk on his lips. Smiling warmly, I nod back.

"Hello my favorite Russians," I say calmly, ignoring Ben's predicament entirely.

I stand, straightening my skirt and adjusting my corset chains a bit, before walking forward and placing a hand on Ivan's shoulder.

"Didn't we have plans, sexiness," I ask gently, moving my hand down his shoulder and along his strong, muscled arm that now holds a very pale and scared Ben.

He's rolled the sleeves of his maroon button-up to his elbows and undone several buttons at the top since we were at the warehouse.

What is it about dress shirts over muscles that is so fucking hot?

"I'm glad you came," Aleksandr murmured, walking up close and placing his hand on my hip.

Oh, well this is starting off well.

I can't help my smile broadening as I lean into Aleksandr, encouraging the closeness.

"You did ask me to," I purr, placing my hand on his hip in response without removing my hand from Ivan's arm.

Ivan straightens to turn his attention to the two of us, dropping Ben - who gasps and sputters as he runs off in fear, casting a final panicked look at me before disappearing through the same door I saw Misty peeking through earlier.

Ivan's scowl melts away as a smirk grows on his face, walking around behind me so I am now sandwiched between the two of them.

I'm not that short, but these two giants standing beside me make me feel miniscule.

A shiver runs up my spine in anticipation when Ivan's hand finds my other hip, his chest now pressed against my back.

"Yes, yes we did," he murmurs into my ear, his breath hot on my neck.

Oh, this is starting off very, very well.

Aleksandr nods to Ivan, dropping his hand from my hip and spinning with a glance over his shoulder to make sure we're following him. Then Ivan places a hand on my back, almost possessively, to lead me toward the VIP suite.

The path and journey feel very similar to the last time we made our way there. Walking into the room, I hear a soft click of the lock on the door and a shiver of excitement runs up my spine.

Which is ridiculous - I shouldn't be excited to be locked in with them given the dangers I'm inviting with this whole, ridiculous thing... yet I can't help it. The warmth spreads through me as they lead me further into the room and Aleksandr pauses, turning around to face me while Ivan moves up from behind.

"Dame," Ivan murmurs into my ear, his arms wrapping around my waist to pull me flush against his chest.

Aleksandr walks forward, our chests almost touching, and he reaches up to cup my cheek.

"You're quiet special," he whispers, his voice soft.

I can tell he's nervous... his eyes keep flicking to Ivan, as if confirming they're on the same page. I reach one hand behind me to wrap around the back of Ivans neck while I place my other on Aleksandr's chest.

I don't respond, I just wait... it's clear he is working up the courage for something and I want to give him the space.

"Ivan and I," he begins, his eyes flicking between my eyes and Ivan over my shoulder, "we..."

They're together... and no one knows... unsaid but clear in all the things he isn't saying.

He swallows, his concern evident on his face as he waits for a reaction.

So I give him one...

I slide my hand up his chest and cup his face, moving slowly in case he wants me to stop. I'm still figuring out exactly what's happening here, and I don't want to push him the wrong way.

"And are you interested in just Ivan, darling Aleksandr?" I ask gently, smiling softly as I eye his lips.

I want him to know that I both understand and accept what he's saying, without expectations or judgement. But that if he is interested in me, I'm certainly interested in him.

The smile he gives me is slow as he moves his lips - cautiously, as if waiting for rejection - toward mine.

"Until very recently, yes," he murmurs against my lips, pausing just before actually kissing me.

Deciding to act, I wrap my hand around the back of his neck and pull him into me for a searing kiss.

I hope I'm reading all these weird signals correctly and the man is bisexual with a leaning toward extremely masculine, sexy Russian businessmen who moonlight as mob bosses, and wants to have a threesome with said Russian and a secretly non-binary trans masc who is currently a femme-presenting assassin.

Thankfully that was the right move.

As if a barrier I didn't realize was there has been dashed away, both Ivan and Aleksandr act at the same time. Aleksandr deepens our kiss, pressing his body into mine so I am pressed back into Ivan's chest. Ivan's lips move down my neck as one hand moves up to my breast and the other find's the front of Aleksandr's trousers.

I respond eagerly to both of them, not restricting my moans as they kiss, rub, and bite in all the right places.

I tense, though, when Aleksandr's hand trails up my neck toward my hair.

I knew it was an inevitability if I kept pushing my luck... so when he moves his hand into the wig I expect he'll be startled to discover it isn't real.

I should stop him... but I don't... because I've lost my fucking mind.

I'm the one surprised, though, when he expertly works his hands under the seal at the base and gently works around the edge to free it from my skin. I freeze, but don't stop him as he works his hands around to free it along the edges.

They both pull away at the same time, and Aleksandr studies my eyes for a long moment before removing my wig from my head gently. He then, just as gently, removes the rubber band and cap to reveal my very short, masculine hair.

My breath catches in my throat, and I wait to see what happens next...

When he runs his fingers through it, it feels amazing and my eyes flutter before I snap them back to his eyes. I'm highly aware of the fact that I can't see Ivan's reaction... but based on the both of them, neither is surprised by the wig or what they see under it.

"I like your real hair," Ivan murmurs from behind me, nipping at my shoulder, "I haven't been able to grab it up until now while you were wearing the wigs."

So he always knew, or at least suspected, that even my hair is part of my costume.

"I do too," Aleksandr agrees softly, holding my gaze as he pushes his hand into the hair at the base of my neck and grabs tight.

I can't help the moan that escapes me at the roughness, and I feel Ivan grin into my neck at the same time that Aleksandr's smirk grows across his face.

"I have a strong feeling you like it rough, Dame," Aleksandr says, his voice low and his eyes darkening with lust.

Oh they have no idea.

"Submit to us tonight," Ivan whispers possessively, his hold around me tightening, "both of us."

I let my smile grow across my face as Aleksandr controls my head, leaning it to the side so that Ivan can bite into the soft space where my neck meets my shoulder. The bite is hard, but it's clear he's still testing the waters.

Holding Aleksandr's gaze as I moan at the pain that causes a flood between my legs at the pleasure it brings, I push my ass back into Ivan's rock-hard member to encourage him while my hand finds Aleksandr's - equally hard and ready.

"Tonight," I agree, breathily, "if next time, you're on your knees for me."

A risk... especially amongst men like this. Yet, I can't help myself.

Their approving growls in response have me melting into their arms, and - for the first time in many, many years - I allow myself to be submissive and vulnerable to someone other than Mel.

I'm not sure if either of them realize what a big deal what I've agreed to is, at least for me, but they're both being equally open with me... they've shared something they clearly don't let others see, and in turn I have offered them my submission.

Because. I've. Lost. My. Fucking. Mind.

The bite that follows Ivan's first bite is much stronger, and I cry out as I lean my head back against him at the pain that's quickly followed by a rush of endorphins.

I hold his head there as he clamps down, letting him know I don't want him to stop - because they have no idea how rough I like it and they're testing me. When I pull him into the bite slightly, he clamps down even harder.

Aleksandr's hand tightens in my hair, pulling my head hard to the side and keeping strain on my scalp, while reaching up my skirt and stroking my folds over my very, very wet panties.

I shudder under them, gasping and moaning - unable to control my own reactions to the simultaneous pain and pleasure they're both giving me a healthy dose of.

"God, you're fucking perfect," Aleksandr murmurs as Ivan finally releases me from his bite and begins to kiss back up my neck.

Ivan's hand snakes up from my breast and wraps gently around my throat, squeezing gently to test the waters. I reach up and apply pressure to his fingers and thumb, choking myself with his hand to encourage him further.

His growl of approval mixed with his hand around my throat has my eyes rolling back into my head.

Aleksandr works to remove my corset - unhurried, each movement measured and intentional. Then my skirt. It doesn't take long for me to stand before them in panties and boots - completely exposed and feeling even more naked than usual with my wig off.

A part of me takes solace in the fact that the makeup still covers my tattoos. It's movie-production level coverup, and doesn't come off without a specific balm, so even if they knew it was a coverup it'd be difficult for them to expose it without intentional effort.

My thoughts are pulled away when I feel a finger slide into me, Aleksandr pumping it in and out slowly before adding another. My moans mix with the heavy breathing of Ivan behind me as his lip trail down the other side of my neck and then a flare of wonderful pain explodes when he bites down again. Ivan's hands are exploring my nipples, alternating between hard pinches and gentle flicks, all while Aleksandr watches us hungrily.

"Give us a 'red' if you need us to stop," Ivan whispers into my ear, his hot breath sending shivers down my spine.

I nodded in understanding at the safe word, a new thrill that I might need it passing through me.

How long has it been since I let a man touch me like this?

Never, the answer whispers through me.

I've never trusted a man with my body like this. Men are violent, unpredictable, and emotional... men have never shown this was something I could trust them with.

I've lost my fucking mind.

"Unbutton Aleksandr's shirt," Ivan ordered, his chest warm to my back and his hard dick rubbing between my ass cheeks with a promise for the near future.

I obey, not sure of the honorific to use with him... Sir doesn't fit him... he's more than such a simple, over-used word. Daddy is out - that's a hard fucking no for me.

As I reach for Aleksandr's top collar button, I smile having founding it...

"Yes... moy bog," I murmur.

A sharp intake of breath behind me lets me know I achieved my goal. Calling him 'my God' in his own tongue gave me tingles, and I find myself sinking further into the mindset as I unbutton and remove Aleksandr's shirt.

"Fuck," Aleksandr murmurs, removing his fingers from me only long enough to shrug his shirt to the floor, then replacing them quickly.

He's as perfect as I imagined he'd be with his shirt decorating the floor. Like Ivan he has tattoos hidden beneath his clothes, but instead of them being focused on his left side they span most of his torso. He also has scars, just like all of us do in this life, and the pale lines break apart the designs that decorate his skin in several places.

I appreciate that, like Ivan, his body is real. No fake six pack from gym-only workouts and dehydration, no 'v' or shaved pecs... he is a perfect specimen of real strength earned from years of training. It's impossible not to run my fingers through the hair on his chest in appreciation of it.

"Already, moy gospodin?" I breathily tease Aleksandr, earning a groan of approval as his fingers pick up speed and take my breath away.

My God and My Lord... though gospodin is more common in the BDSM scene than to literally call someone their God. Yet, it just feels right. It fits this moment well as their touches, the feeling of Aleksandr's fingers curling inside me, and Ivan's breath on my neck all cause the heat to build in my core.

"His belt, krasnyj," Ivan orders, and I don't hesitate to obey, tingling at the double meaning of the word 'red' that also means 'beautiful' in their native tongue.

These men are melting me into nothing.

"On your knees," Aleksandr whispers before my hand reaches him.

I slip to my knees, pulling away from both sets of hands as I kneel, and remove Aleksandr's belt. With a smirk, I bow and present it above my head as a properly trained submissive.

Two groans of approval show me they recognize the movement, confirming to them both now that this is not my first BDSM rodeo.

Removing the belt from my hands, Aleksandr doesn't hesitate to wrap it around my neck and create a choking collar and leash - testing my boundaries lightly as he pulls it tightly and looks to me for reactions.

My moan is enough to cause a spark behind his eyes, encouraging him to tighten it further as he kicks his shoes off.

"Take him out and taste him, krasnyj," Ivan rasps, his voice thick with hunger.

I don't hesitate, unzipping his trousers and pulling him out. His glorious, uncut cock is swollen and rigid, precum leaking from him already, and I greedily lick it up to get my first taste.

I lick him from base to tip and suck him into my mouth, breathing out as I take him deep and breathing in as I pull away. I rub my tongue in and along that sensitive spot right beneath the head earning sounds of approval. Smiling, as much as possible with my mouth full, I repeat the actions - slow at first, then faster and faster.

I tighten my lips as I pull away, loosening them again as I return to his base, and repeatedly taking the tip of him into my throat. His moans quickly escalate into more desperate sounds of pleasure, before graduating to curses.

"Fuck!" he hisses, pulling away suddenly as his cock tenses.

I'd gotten him too close, and he isn't ready for that yet. Breathing heavily, he stares at me with hooded eyes before looking to Ivan.

Ivan moves in front of me, his shirt already removed and his glorious tattoos on full display. I feel Aleksandr kneel behind me, lifting me and positioning me to straddle above him - my back to his chest.

"Do you want my cock to fill you up, krasnyj," Aleksandr whispers into my ear, seeking consent and making my already wet core tighten and flood with heat.

Is there anything hotter than reconfirming consent in the heat of the moment?

"God yes, moy gospodin," I murmur, my words filled with desperation and a plea to be fucked.

Without hesitation he slams me down as if I weigh nothing, filling me to the brim in an instant. I cry out in pleasure, throwing my head back onto his shoulder and pulling against the leash Ivan now holds restricting my air even more.

Ivan walks forward keeping the tension on my leash, his cock free and positioned before me. Without the need for a command, I take him into my mouth as if starved for him - because I am. Desperate to taste him while Aleksandr thrusts roughly upward into me. I time my breathing and tongue to Aleksandr's thrusts, moving down Ivan's shaft each time I'm thrust upward.

The sounds of pleasure fill the room and I feel when Ivan and Aleksandr both tense, ready to fill me.

"Take all of it," Ivan grunts, tightening his hold in my hair - his movements and speed becoming erratic as he gets closer.

I hum in ecstasy, ready to swallow everything he's about to give me, the bliss of the feelings overwhelming my mind completely as I feel the building of my own climax.

Their curses as they release into me with a final thrust tips me over the edge, and my vision explodes when I orgasm with them.

Flopping backward into Aleksandr, he holds me tightly so I don't fall forward as my body slumps. It's a long moment before Aleksandr pulls out of me, and we all melt into each other to enjoy the afterglow.

"Stay," Ivan whispers, caressing my face as he lays before me so close our noses almost touch.

I feel Aleksandr's hand gently run down my side, his chest pressed close to my back as he kisses my shoulder. He grips my hip as Ivan pleas, his silent request loud and clear in his touch.

"I can't," I choke out, genuinely upset to have to refuse, "You know we can't."

I shake my head, lowering my gaze, because I hate that this has to end. We have to end it. They don't even understand what they're asking for, and honestly once the excitement of the mystery that is me fades it'll quickly become clear they don't really want me.

They don't know that... but I do. There's so much they don't know, and while that may seem exciting right now - it's dangerous.

Everything about this is too fucking dangerous.

"I've lost my fucking mind."

"We all have," Ivan chuckles, lifting my chin gently and forcing me to meet his gaze.

Shit, did I say that out loud?

"Who are you?" Aleksandr whispers into my shoulder, his kisses still gentle but his touch more urgent.

"I can't," I whisper, my eyes holding Ivan's as my hand reaches back and I find Aleksandr's hip while the other touches Ivan's chest.

Ivan slams his lips into mine, trying to break my resolve... and damn me if he isn't doing a damn good job. Moaning, I pull Aleksandr toward me as I kiss Ivan passionately, desperate for these moments before I have to go.

This has to be the last night. They're getting too close... if it was risky before, it's nothing compared to where we are now.

As if sensing my desperation for them, their touches and kisses become more heated - their desperation matching my own.

We spend the evening on the floor of his lounge, a tangle of three bodies openly exploring each other. Each round ended with us panting and clutching one another as their requests repeat - before they'd eventually give in and we'd go again.

I never give them my name, but each time they ask it gets harder to tell them no.

By the end of the night, we're all spent - laying in a melted puddle of limbs and cum and sweat.

We drift off like that, wrapped up in one another and holding each other close. I allow myself a small reprieve... a small rest... but I wake soon after as they both lay sleeping around me. Aleksandr's arm is draped over me with his hand laid gently on Ivan's hip, and Ivan is in a similar position.

Knowing they're together... it changes things. It gives me hope, and that's a very, very dangerous thing. I don't want to leave... but I know I have to. It'll be easier this way... safer. I don't know how much longer I can truly resist them, especially after this.

Gently and silently, I extradite myself from their embraces. I dress quietly and quickly, pulling my wig on but keeping my shoes in my hand to prevent the sounds from waking them. I look at them for a long time, laying together on the ground, before I head for the door... their breathing even and their perfect bodies relaxed in a way they never are awake.

I have to swallow a choking breath, devastated to leave.

In a moment of absolute lunacy, I walk to Ivan's desk and write a note before I sneak out... then I leave quickly before I can change my mind.

I make sure to lock the door before I leave - I won't leave them vulnerable to an attack. Once outside the door, I put my shoes on and slowly make my way out of the now dark and deserted club.

By the time I arrive at the safe house, hours later, I'm sluggish, wonderfully sore, and overwhelmingly... sad. It was a perfect night. They were perfect.

I resolve, then, to leave the city after this job. I'll talk to Mel... once we've finished, I have to leave. If I don't, I won't be able to resist them - and I can't risk it.

I'm disappointed to wash them off of me in the shower when I clean up, feeling as if washing off their scents is also erasing a piece of them. Then I climb into bed and fall into a sleep where I relive our one perfect night together in my dreams.

These dreams will have to be enough.

--

The day off to rest is much needed, and I plan to spend the entire time in my safe house reviewing and re-reviewing the plan. I need to know every detail by heart before tomorrow, and it's not worth going out and introducing any risks before the meet.

I've just woken up and finished my second cup of coffee when I hear my burner ding. I feel a flutter in my stomach immediately, and curse myself for my own weakness.

'You're always full of surprises.'

I shouldn't have done it - giving the burner number to Ivan and Aleksandr - but I just couldn't bring myself to leave without giving them a way to reach out if they needed me.

'I'd never dream of being boring, sexiness.'

The contact shouldn't have made my cheeks flare, yet here I am blushing as I stare at the screen of my flip phone. Less than a dozen people have this number - the one I keep nearby for my non-WKTA efforts that usually land someone owing me a favor. The old technology prevents tracking, but it's still a risk to give it out.

I put the phone away, having established the connection. We shouldn't be in contact more than necessary, and they know that too.

Instead of letting my thoughts linger on the two Russians who are messing with my brain, I spend the day studying, stretching, and preparing for tomorrow. I clean my gun, pack my bag of supplies, ensure my gear is ready, and pump myself up mentally during my mental breaks.

This is one of the most insane jobs I've ever tried to pull off, and the only one I've ever done without the backing of WKTA. Anything could happen, and I need to be ready for it.

I make sure I'm well rested, limber, and prepared when I finally pack up and head toward the meet up spot Friday evening.

Swapping out cars halfway through, I exchange Mel's legit vehicle for a stolen car I will dump after the job is done. When I pull up, no one thinks twice about the junker - they all know what it is the moment they see it.

"The fuck is on your face?" one of the people I haven't met before scoffs, looking at me incredulously.

I'm in all black gear and the masquerade mask I've painted on the top half of my face is also black, red swirls painted in it to give it the decorative flair I'm known for. It's the only red I sport today, but I couldn't go without it completely - it's simply not my style. Even my wig is black, French braided so the tip of the tail barely reaches my shoulders. My gear is light enough to facilitate what I need to do today, but still screams 'merc' to anyone that knows what to look for.

I'll put a bandana over the bottom half of my face once later, but for now that's tucked into one of the many pockets of my vest.

I smirk at the newbie wondering if I should give him just a little stab before we go, but Denis quickly speaks up.

"Do not antagonize the sniper you're relying on to keep you alive, idēət."

I nod at Denis, who nods back respectfully.

Fine, no stabbing. Since Denis is being so nice.

Ivan and Aleksandr both chuckle from behind the team, and I have a strong feeling they both know exactly what I was thinking. I can't help letting my grin grow when I see them, confirming their thoughts.

I let my eyes linger on each of them for a little longer than is necessary... memorizing the details of them before I leave. Some of the team notice, but no one dares say anything. I give them a long, slow nod before clearing my throat and turning to Boris.

"The drive?" I say, holding my hand out.

He places it in my hand along with an ear piece, and I nod to him in thanks as I place the earbud into my ear. Looking at the rest of the team, I study them all for a moment ensuring I know their faces.

Can't go shooting the people I'm supposed to keep alive, after all.

"Udachi," I wish them good luck and then spin on my heel and head back towards the car I arrived in without another word.

I feel him before he reaches out and grabs my wrist, but I don't turn around because if I see his eyes... I might finally relent. I'm barely resisting him at this point, and I think he knows it.

"After..." Ivan mutters, but I shake my head before he finishes that thought.

"I can't," I whisper, tugging lightly to free my wrist.

He doesn't let go, and instead whips me around to pin me against his chest - forcing me to meet his perfect, brilliant blue eyes.

God. Fucking. Damnit.

"After," he grits out, holding me firmly, "we're going to have a talk. Come to me. Don't make me come looking for you."

I study him for a long moment, hesitating as so many possibilities run through my mind, but I finally press my lips together and say nothing.

I want to. I want to so fucking badly... but I just can't take the risk.

His hold loosens and I step away slowly, holding his gaze for a long moment.

"Goodbye... Ivan," I say softly, before I get in the car and back the car away.

I hold his gaze as he stands there, unmoving, until I put the car in drive and speed away. 

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