It had been weeks and I was still living with the Curtis boys. I think in a way we all wanted me to stay.

"No, you see X would actually be 11 in this case. You have to divide it by 2 first." I informed Ponyboy.

"Geez Ella you're real smart. Why'd ya drop out?" Ponyboy asked while I sat in front of him and Johnny. I had grown close with all of the boys.

"I had to get a job, remember?" I spoke sadly. I loved school. I was good at it too.

They both gave me a sympathetic look and I shook it off. I walked to the kitchen to help Darry make dinner.

"Aren't Steve and Sodapop usually off work by now?" I asked while picking up the glass of sweet tea.

"Yeah, Soda isn't gonna be here tonight." He said in a nonchalant tone.

"Why not?"

"He's on a date." He said which sent a jolt of jealousy down my spine. I flinched in response which resulted in me dropping the tea pitcher.

"I'm so sorry." I said quickly cleaning up my mess.

"No it's fine, are you okay?" Darry asked while trying to help me.

"Yes I'm fine I don't-" I was cut off by my own throat shutting me down. I could feel it closing up, something I did when I tried not to cry.

"Ella-" Dallas spoke softly, he knew about my feelings for Sodapop. The other boys however didn't.

"No I'm fine, I just remembered I have somewhere to be." I lied not as well as I usually did. The stutters in my throat were a dead give a way. I picked up the last pieces of glass and threw them away, the last piece cutting deeply into my hand.

I made a slight noise which was enough for Dallas to grab me and look at my hand.

"Good God Ella, that's gonna need stitches." He said angrily at my careless behavior.

"No it's fine I promise." I protested.

"Ella stop!" This time his voice raised ferociously.

I broke. And I cried. Dallas grabbed me quickly and pulled me into his chest. The boys didn't understand. They didn't know if I was crying because of my hand or what. But Dallas knew. He knew I was crying because I was falling for Soda, and because Soda didn't feel the same way.

Darry took me to the hospital and I did have to get stitches which felt great. A diagonal line straight across my right palm.

"You want to tell me what's going on kid?" He asked suddenly as we got back into his truck.

"Well I forgot that I had to go to the-" I started lying but he interrupted me.

"Stop lying to me Ella!" He pulled over to the side of the road. "I get that I've only known you for a few weeks but I know you're lying. Something is going on in that beautiful mind of yours that you aren't telling us. Dallas knows, and he's scared to death. So tell me, so I can help you." He commanded. A tear rolled softly down the left side of my cheek.

"I have feelings for Soda. The first couple days we had met were amazing. And I thought he felt the same way. But he doesn't." I never looked him in the eyes as I confessed my growing affection for his little brother.

"Ella, Soda goes out with lots a girls-"

"Exactly! But I'm not like those girls. I'm not stunning like Sandy. I can't afford all the makeup in the world. I don't have a hot car like Angie. I'm a drop out. I won't go to a nice college like Haley or Riley. I'm not like the girls he goes out with. And this is the third girl he's gone out with this week! And it kills me! Because it isn't me! Because I'm never going to be that girl! Just like I'm not enough for my mom and dad!" Slowly the truth started to come out. It wasn't Soda I was really crying about. "I've been gone for a month and they haven't even looked for me! Why don't they care? I don't get it!" I started to lose my voice and cry again and Darry reacted similarly to Dallas. He just hugged me. Not knowing how else to comfort me.

"Why doesn't anyone want me?" I sobbed into his chest and he just held me. I could hear him trying not to cry, but my screams were too loud to know for sure if he was or not.

"What's wrong with me?" I continued to cry until I fell asleep in Darry's arms.