Prompt: Something where Phil use to be in an abusive/bad relationship before he got to know Dan. And when Dan came into his life things became much better and he felt happy for the first time in a really long time. But he still has bad days where he feels small and insecure but at the end of the day Dan is always there loving him.

I found this prompt on the Phanfic Tumblr blog :) if you guys don't know it, search it up because THAT IS WHERE I FIND MOST OF MY PHANFIC!

I turned it into a drabble :P

TW: If you couldn't tell, abuse and self hate.

Phil was nothing. He was a mess and, in his eyes, useless within the world. He greeted death like it was his best friend and he detested the idea of love. Love was nothing but a fantasy, it was stupid. Ridiculous, even.

Phil wanted to die. He walked around town like a zombie as people stared at him with sympathy in their expressions. He was a mess, his hair was certainly not brushed and his eyes wore dark purple rings which basically told everyone that he had had nowhere near enough sleep.

Every time he saw two people together, their hands joined, his face fell further. Everyone looked so happy, he envied their relationships. Why couldn't he find someone like that? Someone who made him feel special? Oh, that's right, because love didn't exist.

But then he met Dan. Dan was his sun, he lit up his world. He made him feel like he was something. He was someone and he was worth it. He opened a new door within his life, one which held the acceptance of love and happiness.

Danisnotonfire followed you!

You have a message from Danisnotonfire!

Phil's eyes grazed over the message and a small smile appeared on his face.

Hey, you seem like such a cool guy! Can we be friends?

Phil responded with an easy yes and, little did he know, this boy would change his life.

Phil was in a terrible relationship. His boyfriend reminded him that he was stupid and didn't deserve love. He lied and said that Phil deserved every hit, every punch.

"You're an idiot! You deserve nothing!" Phil's boyfriend screamed, sending a punch towards Phil who had his hands clasped over his ears.

"Stop it. Stop it." Phil repeated over and over again, rocking back and forth as if it would make it all go away.

"You're useless! The only reason I am still with you is out of sympathy!" Phil then just closed his eyes and let the words cut at him like knives and the punches hit him.

But then Dan came along and helped Phil break up with his boyfriend. Dan reminded him that he was smart and deserved the whole world. Most importantly, he convinced Phil that what his boyfriend was doing wasn't right.

"You need to break up with him, Phil.." Dan mumbled, using his thumb to graze over the black ring around Phil's tear filled eyes.

"No, I can't-" Phil started, his voice shaking.

"Yes, you can. I'll help you. What he's doing is not right.." Phil couldn't argue- he knew Dan was right.

Phil was afraid he would be trapped in the relationship forever. He just wanted to escape, death seemed to be his only option.

'I can't do this anymore'. Phil's mind chanted as he sobbed to himself. He was so afraid- his hands were trembling, as was his whole body and he couldn't find it in himself to remember how to breathe. He wanted to run, to pack his bags and to sprint away from his life and never look back.

But he was afraid. He was petrified.

Then Dan appeared in his life. He helped him learn to love everything he had. Dan helped Phil appreciate the good things in the world.

"Dan, I am so scared-" Phil choked out a sob as he backed up into the wall. Tears were streaming down his cheeks as he dropped down to the floor and pulled his knees into his chest.

"Phil, calm down." Dan bent down onto his knees so he was at Phil's height. He opened up his arms and let Phil hesitantly fall into them. "It's okay.. he's gone. He will never come back and, even if he does, I'll be there to tell him to leave you alone, okay?" Dan gently brought his hands through his friend's hair. He could hear Phil's rapid breathing but he had to stay calm for his sake.

"What if he hurts you?" Phil gasped and Dan shook his head.

"He won't. You're safe now."

"You promise?"

"I promise." Dan let Phil sob into his chest until he calmed down.

Phil was insecure. He couldn't look at himself in the mirror without sending words full of hatred towards himself. He thought he was disgusting, weird, ugly, his mind was poisoned with his boyfriend's words.

Phil stared at himself in the mirror in front of him. Actually, he didn't stare, he full on glared. "You're disgusting." He mumbled. "Weird. Ugly." He looked directly into his own misty blue eyes to show that he meant every word.

"I wish I wasn't you." Phil's hands clenched into fists and no one would ever understand how much he wanted to hurt- to kill- himself at that moment.

But then Dan made an appearance. Yes, Phil still had his insecure days but Dan was always there to love him. Dan was always his shoulder to cry on. Dan made Phil feel happy. Happiness was a fantasy to Phil until the day Dan came along. Dan made Phil experience that fantasy.

"You're disgusting. Weird-" Phil's words were cut off when a hand grabbed his.

"You're neither of those things. You're beautiful, Phil, okay? Believe me." Dan whispered, pulling Phil closer. "Never ever think those things again... if  you do.. come to me straight away, promise me you will?" Phil was skeptical until he noticed Dan's teary eyes. Immediately, sorrow swirled in the pit of his stomach at the fact that he made his friend cry.

"I promise." He forced out and, he always stayed true to his word.

Phil was alone, he had no one.

Until Dan came into his life. Then he had someone.