Broken Home
Update... Yay.
I couldn't find a decent video of the song so you guys can search for it yourself if you'd like! It's called Broken Home and it's by 5 Seconds of Summer :D
TW: Parents arguing, vague (like really vague) mentions of abuse and just general sadness.
Third person
Phil looked to the left at his friend who already had furious tears streaming down his pale cheeks and his stomach twisted. Phil grabbed his hand and gave it a squeeze, sending him a small smile to show him he could do it. He helped Dan walk forward and towards the front door of the house which held so many depressing memories, all while Dan kept his eyes glued to the floor. Phil held his hand out and felt them shape the handle, squeezing Dan's hand again. "Are you sure you want to do this?"
"I-I.. I need t-to." Dan mumbled, unlocking their hands from each other and pushing himself forward. Phil sent him a proud grin and they walked into the home- the broken home. Dan froze as soon as his shoe-covered feet touched the hallway carpet, just gazing around at the deserted hallway. Phil could almost see the rapid, hyper thoughts running through Dan's mind as he met his childhood memories. He held a hand out and swiped it against the wall, feeling the peeling paint and it just made more tears drip down his face. He walked into the other room and Phil followed, making sure to watch Dan closely in case he started to panic or anything of the sort.
They would yell, they would scream, they were fighting it out
He would hope, he would pray, he was waiting it out
Dan's vision blurred as he saw his living room before him, memories flooding his mind. The sofa laid discarded and unsit on for years and that just made him squeeze his eyes shut to fight the panic. He found himself walking forward and sitting himself down on the old sofa. Dust jumped into the air as he made contact with the material but he didn't care. "T-They fought s-so much. I w-wish they didn't.."
"I know." Phil whispered, stepping forward and brushing Dan's fringe out of his eyes. Their eyes met and Phil noticed how fragile and broken Dan's hazel looked.
"I-It was all m-my fault..." Dan whispered, standing up and walking into the next room.
"Never say that.. They loved you and always will."
Holding onto a dream
While he watches these walls fall down
Sharp words like knives, they were cutting him down
Shattered glass like the past, it's a memory now
Dan stared at the wooden dining table standing in front of him and held back a sob. They always fought at the dinner table while all Dan could do was cry and scream at them to stop. They never did though. He remembered the time when his dad threw a glass, just to watch it smash. In a way, the glass was like their relationship- shattered and unfixable.
Dan could already feel his emotional walls toppling over as his emotions flooded over. He couldn't help but sob when he turned to see that there were still a collection of magnets on the fridge, all frayed and faded. They were all different inspirational quotes and some of them hit a little too close to his heart. Home is where the heart is.
"Not always." Dan whispered to himself, grabbing the magnet and dropping it to the floor. The tiny shatter made him wince but other than that he was just numb.
Holding onto a dream
While he watches these walls fall down
"Dan, I wouldn't encourage you to go upstairs..." Phil murmured, grabbing Dan's arm as he began to head to the staircase. Dan gasped and pushed him back as if to say I don't care as he climbed up to his second floor.
Dan's walls finally collapsed as he saw his closed bedroom door. In dark black letters was his name and around it was small stuck on stars. He ran forward and into the dreaded room, just to see it was set up as he had it as a child. Not a thing had moved since the house was deserted.
His small Winnie-The-Pooh bear was still sitting up against the head of his old bed, his red shirt all torn and his eyes scratched. Mum gave that to me the day I was born. In other words, when they were okay. Dan thought to himself as his eyes grazed the broken frame discarded on the floor from his final day with them. He remembered screaming and yelling as he broke the picture frame, the happy family in it tearing apart and falling down, never to stand up again.
Hey mum, hey dad
When did this end?
Where did you lose your happiness?
I'm here alone inside of this broken home
Who's right, who's wrong
Who really cares?
"MUM, DAD, SHUT UP!" Dan screamed, hitting his fists against the wall in fury. He threw anything in sight, hurling random books across the room, finding the contact with the wall or floor oddly satisfying.
"Daniel James Howell! This is not your business! This is between your father and I!" His mum yelled in response, only feeding Dan's burning fire of rage.
"Of course it's his business! This is his fault!" His dad screeched back and Dan let out a small growl, his face burning red in anger and fury.
"No, it's not! It's yours for being such an unfit father!"
"How dare you accuse me of such a crime? At least I didn't just watch as he cried!"
"At least I didn't hit him!"
"MUM! DAD! STOP IT!" Dan was beginning to sob as he collapsed to the floor and pulled his knees to his chest.
The fault, the blame, the pain's still there
I'm here alone inside of this broken home, this broken home
Dan shook his head, trying to repress the slowly surfacing memory but failing. Phil noticed this and ran forward, wrapping his arms around his friend. "It's okay.." He whispered, rubbing Dan's back in a soothing motion. "They're not here, it's just you and me.." Dan hesitantly nodded, unable to tear his stare from the broken frame on the floor. "We can leave now, if you want? You aren't forced to do anything you don't want to do.."
"I need to g-go to t-their room.." Dan murmured in response, pushing Phil away again and taking shaky steps to his parents' bedroom. His legs were like jelly and his forehead was going crazy with sweat as he reached out and pushed the door open. As soon as he was inside he made sure he had turned the small lock on the door, to give himself some privacy. He needed to do this on his own. The bed was left unmade, the mirror was stained, the photos were laid down on their front, the wardrobe door was open, the wallpaper was peeling and Dan just took that in. The last person who had sat on the bed would have been one of his parents before they had left, never to see each other again.
Dan put his hand on the freezing bed cover and pulled it up, lying it neatly down the way it should have been. Maybe if he fixed that, things would change, memories would be remade, positivity would embark but nothing happened. If anything, the room seemed less real and more like a fragment of his imagination.
Wrote it down on the walls, he was screaming it out
Made it clear, he's still here, are you listening now?
Just a ghost in the halls
He picked up the laid down photo frames and his eyes grazed across the photos they held. One was of his mum and dad at their wedding day. Their smiles were real and everything was fine. Dan couldn't help but brush his finger against it, in hopes that he would somehow be able to go back in time to then and warn them of the future. Nothing happened.. if anything the room just seemed even more sad.
Dan closed the wardrobe, dust shaking off as the doors slammed against the figure. He let out a tiny sneeze as the dust hit his face before turning back to the room itself. If anything, the dust made the room seem more ancient and less new.
There was a tiny, fragile knock on the bedroom door until Phil's voice filled the room. "Dan, are you okay?"
"P-Perfect." Dan whispered, just loud enough for Phil to make out.
Feeling empty, they're vacant now
All the battles, all the wars, all the times that you've fought
he's the scar, he's the bruises, he's the pain that you brought
There was life, there was love
Like a light and it's fading out
Dan could remember so much, it was as if he was travelling back in time to the bad days. He could almost feel the presence of his parents, although he was completely aware that they were alive and somewhere else in the world right now. Dan could make out his dad's face and the formal suit he would wear every day for work. He could paint the picture of his dad's smile, before it faded into a frown and his face moulded into anger and frustration. His mum was beside him, her short hair brushing against her shoulders and her cheeks a light pink to show her happiness. She was wearing her favourite dress which she wore to work all the time but her face soon joined his dad in fury.
Dan dropped to his knees as he watched them screaming and yelling. He could hear absolutely nothing but he could tell by their facial expressions that they were arguing. Suddenly the image took over his mind and it felt too real for the poor boy. He covered his ears and closed his eyes, muttering for them to stop! Stop! Please stop! The image was burnt into his brain and it wouldn't fade, it was a roaring fire engraved into his mind and it wouldn't go away.
Hey mum, hey dad
When did this end?
Where did you lose your happiness?
I'm here alone inside of this broken home
Who's right, who's wrong
Who really cares?
"Dan, stop yelling!" Dan's dad screamed, glaring at his son who was yelling all sorts of blasphemy at his parents, a scowl engraved in his face.
"Why should I? You must love it since that's all you ever do!"
"And whose fault is that? Yours! If you weren't here, we'd be happy!"
"Don't you fucking say that!" Dan yelled, running upstairs and collapsing on his bed. The room was dark, the only source of light was the moon hanging in the sky outside. Dan just laid there and cried into his pillow, hoping that some way everything would go away.
"It's my fault." Dan whispered to himself, his voice rather muffled because of the pillow covering his mouth. "If I didn't exist, my parents would live happily ever after." Dan shook his head to himself before letting out another broken sob.
The fault, the blame, the pain's still there
I'm here alone inside of this broken home, this broken home
"It was my fault.. If I didn't exist my parents would have lived happily ever after." Dan whispered to himself before letting out a loud, piercing scream. He didn't care that Phil would probably be worried, he just had to let it all out. He screamed and screamed until his voice cracked. When his voice had left him, like his family, he began to sob again. He could just about make out Phil's fists thrashing against the door but he couldn't do anything but sob.
"DAN!" Phil yelled, making Dan turn his head to the closed door, his eyes cloudy and red. "OPEN THE DOOR NOW!" Dan forced himself to his feet and shakily walked towards the door, quickly unlocking it before falling to his knees once more.
You've gotta let it go, you're losing all your hope
Nothing left to hold, locked out in the cold
You painted memories then washed out all the scenes
I'm stuck in between a nightmare and lost dreams
"Dan..Come here.." Phil opened his arms and Dan ran into them, letting out a small sob as he nuzzled his head into Phil's chest.
"It's m-my fault.."
"Don't say that, bear.. it was never your fault.."
"B-But dad-"
"Never, ever, ever listen to what he said. He was just phased by the fury."
"They were my n-nightmare and you're my d-dream.."
"You just need to let the dream takeover."
"I c-can't. F-Forgetting i-is impossible."
"It's not, just hold my hand and I will guide you through the process of forgetting."
Hey mum, hey dad
When did this end?
Where did you lose your happiness?
I'm here alone inside of this broken home
Hey mum, hey dad
When did this end?
Where did you lose your happiness?
I'm here alone inside of this broken home
Who's right, who's wrong
Who really cares?
The fault, the blame, the pain's still there
I'm here alone inside of this broken home
This broken home
"I'm leaving! I've had enough!" Dan's dad yelled, it was moments later when the sound of a door slamming filled the tense air. Dan couldn't help but let out a tiny gasp as he heard his mum scream out. He ran downstairs to find his mum was sobbing to herself, a glass of water lying on its side beside her.
"Mum?" Dan innocently whispered, suddenly hating himself for not doing more to help his parents.
"Get the fuck away from me. I don't need you, I don't need your father!" Dan's mum stood up and shoved him, letting out a sarcastic laugh as he fell down to the floor. "I'm out."
And she was gone.
Neither came back.
Dan never found out where they went but the world was flying with possibilities. They could have stayed with relatives or they could have stayed with friends but Dan would never know.
Dan was, from then on, scared of the world around him. He couldn't stand up from the cold ground for almost an hour as he just stared at what was in front of him and cried. When he finally composed himself enough to get up, he immediately ran to his phone and sobbed to his best friend- Phil.
For some reason, Phil helped Dan.. fix himself.
I hope this was okay :3
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