This was a prompt by @thatgentleman

"So, Phil is developing anorexia, and Dan starts noticing the symptoms. He's in denial though, because "pHiL wOuLd NeVeR fEeL tHe NeEd To dO sOmEtHiNg LiKe tHaT". After a few months, Phil ends up passing out and is hospitalized. He's then diagnosed with anorexia nervosa, and Dan feels like shit because he ignored the signs. (also please don't make him magically cured at the end)"

TW: Eating disorders.

"No, thank you." Phil mumbled, pushing the plate away from him. Dan frowned because the Phil he knew would never say no to biscuits. The Phil he knew would take a few too many and end up with a stomach ache later in the evening as Dan tried his best not to pity him because it was his own fault. He needed to recognise his limit... but his limit was not none. It was probably three or something.

"Are you Phil?" Dan asked, taking his third cookie. He dipped it into his milk before noticing Phil was watching his every move.

"Last time I checked." Phil's voice was laced with humour but something about him seemed... off. Dan couldn't quite place what exactly was up but he definitely wasn't acting like himself.

"Are you alright?"

"Of course." Phil grinned to prove his point but his eyes held another emotion. The emotion was fairly hard to identify but Dan soon recognised it to be some sort of anxiety. Dan didn't question it.

-

"What are you going to get?" Dan asked, placing his head on both of his hands as he watched his friend's eyes scan the menu.

"I'm not sure. I might just have some salad or something. I ate a huge lunch." Phil took a sip of his water, waiting to see how Dan would react. He responded with a loud laugh, not believing that Phil Lester would choose a salad over pizza or some other delicious food.

"You're kidding right?"

"No?" Dan's face hardened.

"Okay, you're not the Phil I know."

"Why not?"

"You would never have salad here. You love their pizza."

"I'm just not hungry today, alright? Just leave me alone and order what you want." Phil snapped, making Dan drop his gaze down to the menu on the table. Phil seemed really tense and something really did seem up with his friend. He didn't like it.

-

"Today we will be baking..." Dan started, dragging out the last syllable.

Phil then jumped into frame and they both yelled, "CAKE!"

"But what cake, you ask? Only the best chocolate cake on the planet! We also have some cool toppings to liven it up a little such as..." Phil held up a packet of marshmallows and then some chocolate buttons. "Oh wow, that's a surprise! Phil hasn't eaten most of them this time." Phil let out a short laugh but it was proven fake when his sad eyes cast down to his feet.

"You will need..." Phil started before Dan could question if he was okay.

-

"Phil?" Dan asked once he noticed his best friend drifting off into another world. Phil's eyes widened a little as he turned his attention back to Dan. "Do you want some lunch?" Phil literally just shook his head so Dan furrowed his eyebrows. "Why not?"

"I'm not hungry... I had a big breakfast." Phil mumbled. Dan nodded and it was only when he started to make himself a sandwich that he realised he had been with Phil all morning and he hadn't eaten anything.

Phil never seemed to eat much anymore and that was very extreme for some stupid diet. It was almost like he had an eating disorder or something. Dan physically shook his head. Phil couldn't have an eating disorder because he loved food. If it was legal to marry food, Phil probably would have done that by now. There was no way...

But it did make sense. The more Dan thought about it, the more it seemed obvious to him. Phil was always avoiding eating with stupid excuses and Dan hadn't actually seen Phil sit down and eat a full meal in a long time.

He was just making a big deal out of nothing, wasn't he? Of course Phil was fine. He was perfectly fine.

-

Dan kept pushing the thought of Phil having an eating disorder away, convincing himself that Phil would never do such a thing. He couldn't help but notice Phil's shirts seeming baggier and his body seeming thinner as more days passed.

But he still didn't want to believe it.

Then one day, he had to.

Phil had seemed really drowsy all morning but he had just told Dan he was feeling sick. Dan tried to convince Phil to stay in bed but they had to sort out some things out for the tour. They were actually going to see the set up for the first time and do a run through of the plan and that was exciting. So exciting that Phil refused to miss it.

They had got to the building and spoke to the person at the front who sent them in the right direction. Phil had stumbled a little on the way but, again, that was blamed on his 'illness'. Then, about ten minutes after they arrived, Phil completely blacked out. No one was really sure what to do but one person managed to call the emergency services. Dan ran over to Phil whose eyes were tightly shut and his breathing was shallow. "Phil?" He whispered before putting his hand on top of his friend's. If Phil was ill, it was bad.

-

Phil was awake. He squinted his eyes at Dan who looked like he had been crying. His throat was raspy as he choked out a small, "What happened?"

"You passed out." Dan mumbled, quiet, as if he was afraid to speak up. "I need to go tell the doctor you're awake..." Phil nodded slowly as his friend rushed out of the room, soon to come back with a doctor in tow.

"How are you feeling?" The doctor asked.

"Terrible. Everything hurts."

"That's expected. I need to ask you a few questions," The doctor looked at Dan and then back to Phil and both men nodded to encourage him to continue. "Could you please leave so that I can have some privacy with my patient?" Phil's eyes widened and filled with anxiety as Dan turned to leave.

"He can stay!" Phil was quick to say, afraid of being left alone. Dan turned back and reached out to put his hand on top of Phil's. He noticed how tense the man seemed.

"Firstly, you are severely underweight so I need to ask... have you been eating properly?"

"Yeah," Phil replied but he was extremely tense. "I've been dieting a bit, that's all."

The man sighed, looking at Phil's notes for a moment. "Okay. What have you eaten today?"

"I wasn't feeling very well this morning so I didn't eat anything."

"We believe you may be suffering with anorexia nervosa. It is when you-"

"I know what it is and I'm not. I'm literally just dieting and I didn't mean for it to go this far. I-I just wanted to lose some weight." Dan frowned as tears filled his eyes. He should have been there for his friend. Phil was also crying but tears were actually falling down his cheeks as his breathing sped up.

"It is not something you should be ashamed of. We can get you help."

"Could you leave us alone for a moment?" Dan asked with a shaky voice. The doctor sent them both a sad smile before leaving the two.

"I should have said something. This is all my fault. I did notice the signs but I didn't say anything because I was in denial. I could have helped you before it got this bad and-"

"Dan shut up. This isn't your fault. It's mine. I'm sorry I took it this far, I just thought- I thought-" Phil struggled to continue as his sobs took over, making his entire body shake violently.

"It's okay, Phil... I-"

"It's not though. It's not okay. I don't know what to do. I just want to get better but I'm scared. I'm still not skinny enough..."

"Yes, you are. You're too skinny. You heard the doctor, right? You're severely underweight and that isn't healthy. I could have lost you."

"I know!" Phil sniffed and wiped his eyes with his fists but the tears just continued to rapidly fall. "I know... I didn't want to but I needed to lose weight and-"

"Hey..." Dan laced his and Phil's fingers together, looking into his teary blue eyes. "You never needed to lose weight, okay? You're perfect."

"I'm scared, Dan..."

"I know you are. I am too. I don't understand what is going on in your head right now but I can assure you I will be here for you every step of the way. You will get better and you will be okay one day. I promise." Dan reached forward with the hand that wasn't intertwined with Phil's and wiped away a few of his tears. "Now... are you ready to talk to the doctor? I can go if you want to talk to him privately."

Dan turned to leave to get the doctor but Phil spoke up with a timid and very quiet voice, "No, Dan. Please stay."

The ending sucks but hopefully it's okay :)

Thanks for the prompt! If anyone else has any prompts, don't be afraid to leave a comment or message me :) I try my best to write them but sometimes I can't... I hope that's okay!