Fall passed with Hongjoong learning and studying everything unfamiliar nature gave him, finally mastering flying and also equipping himself with new magic charms. Yongguk helped him pierce his ears and gifted him an enchanted ring that could lengthen the period of time he was able to spend outside the wintery fields without getting sick.

Hongjoong started wearing lots of accessoires the two made themselves, his ears, neck and fingers constantly giving off strong auras due to the many magic being bundled there.

Yongguk had told him once that Hongjoong's personal aura was a soft purple and that was why the ring he had gifted him was a sleek bronze band with a beautiful little amethyst in the middle. Hongjoong had learned them to be a perfect tool to loosen and perish spells with so it was a good decision to use it as a catalyst.

Youjin had also sent him a gift. It was a beautiful dress, soft embroidered black fabric that exposed the elegant curve of Hongjoong's clavicles. It's transparent shoulder veils flutterted down his arms until they connected to his body again with through cuffs at his wirsts. More thin black fabric followed him like some kind of cloak. It also had a corset build in around the waist, only making Hongjoong's body seem even more petite and a very short but artfully frayed frilly skirt topped the whole thing off.

Yongguk had only smiled very mischievously when he had given the mysterious package to Hongjoong at first and then took off while mumbling something about having to make a collar.

Hongjoong was entirely overchallenged with the intricacy of the dress, probably taking hours when he first tried it on. Perhaps he was also too proud to ask Yongguk for help.

And while he felt terribly exposed, the air on his legs way too strange to wear outside like that he also felt very pretty, giving it to Youjin that yes, it complimeted him very well.

He truly looked like a fairy in it.

Youjin had also written a card, asking him to wear it at the winter solstice when they saw each other again at the fae festivities. Hongjoong had smiled at first, thinking about indulging the man when suddenly his heart had made a graceless leap.

Seonghwa would be there too.

Would he let Seonghwa see him in this?

Hongjoong imagined it a second too long, the thought of the elf's dark eyes sliding over his bare legs entirely too much for him to handle. This was something to deal with later.

But he forgot it at first, concentrating on his studies again and the dress rested beautifully in his wardrobe, waiting for it's grand day.

And when winter solstice drew near, the days becoming more and more short and Yongguk started their preparations to stay with the fae during winter, fresh panic also returned to Hongjoong.

He really wanted to go, really wanted to see his friends. But his heart had still not calmed.

Yongguk noticed immediately, sitting down next to a worried Hongjoong at the table and gently nudging a cup of steaming hot chocolate over to him. His eyes were kind behind dark locks, ready to look after Hongjoong. He always did and Hongjoong could not ask for a better friend.

"Is it him again?" The halfling conjured his own cup, sipping on it slowly.

Hongjoong nodded nervously, his many earrings tinkling softly.

"I know you've been doing research for spells to end it. It's never a good idea to enforce feelings through magic, you know?"

Another weak nod, Hongjoong lowering his eyes in shame. Of course he knew, it was one of their main rules. But he just wanted to stop already. Stop dreaming of him, stop hoping, stop feeling a phantom of his hands and lips on his body.

"We can still do something at least. I know a more or less harmless spell, but it won't stop him from falling for you perhaps afterwards. Normally it just hurts you, but- but it might only work if he does not feel anything similar for you. And about that, Hongjoong-"

"Don't. Don't assume something like that. This is something not even you can know." Hongjoong's voice was soft and throaty and the words felt strange on his tongue. It was something truthful in his own head but the faint feeling of having bitten in silver stayed, barely painful.

A lie.

It made him incredibly sad already. Stopping his own once human heart from feeling for Seonghwa, the thought alone seemed so cruel. He wanted to destroy something as innocent as blossoming love and it made him feel way too human, way too much as if he belonged to Neheg again.

"I expect you to know how much of a mistake this is? You can lose it over time, if you truly wish not to act upon it. Because it's only that one day you should rather show your strength over it. I will be there, your friends and also Youjin. And Youjin knows too after all."

And Yongguk had this particular shine in his eyes again, his expression of having more to share. He did not however.

"I will go there. And I will stay away from him. And if I still feel unwell after that, you will help me with it, right? We are way too close down there, I will probably see him once a week."

Yongguk nodded proudly, leaning back a bit. His white shirt exposed half of his tattooed chest, one delicate hand coming up to push his hair out of his face.

"Of course. I will take all of the ingedients with me and my ceremonial dagger is always at my side if you want to take even more drastic measures." He patted his hip seriously, the dark joke making Hongjoong's lips quirk.

"Not a bad idea at all. But which god would accept this idiot as a sacrifice? I wouldn't."

Yongguk rose with an amused smile, gently reaching out to ruffle Hongjoong's hair.

"Of course you wouldn't. Worry not, little fae. You shall not suffer more than you already did." He took his cup and stepped towards their little kitchen. Hongjoong too went to his room, mulling his thoughts over in his head for nearly the whole night.

-

"I think I'm sick, I won't go."

Hongjoong was sitting on the wooden stairs, his head buried in his hands while Yongguk was still preparing professionally.

They were minutes away from actually leaving the house and travelling down South. Tomorrow would be the night of winter solstice and Hongjoong had packed his pretty dress and now his stomach was in knots again.

He was not ready at all to see Seonghwa so soon again. Whatever his definition of 'soon' meant.

"That's just nervousness. Come on, we talked about this. I have everything we need. You can leave your heart here if you want."

Oh if only it were that easy.

Hongjoong had wondered countless times. Just why could he not fall in love with his soft mentor, be happy out here in the North with nothing around them but snow? Just why did it have to be that arrogant elf? He did not understand at all.

"I might just rip it out and leave it in a jar next time. Let's go. I hate this weakness."

He stood up with a huff, getting his bundle. Yongguk followed quietly, charming their hut to hide it from curious eyes and then they took off, the wind biting coldly at their forms.

Hongjoong had become used to it, the cold not really damaging him anymore but he could still feel it, still felt it create a frosty film over his newly colored wings. He had colored the blue spots at the tail purple, making them fit to him more and also used some glitter on them to enhance their beauty even more. He adored their new look.

They were still much weaker than Yongguk's impressive dragon wings, slowing them down but they would be able to get to the far village before dawn. And then Hongjoong was left with one night, one more night before chaos would ensue for sure.

Winter solstice was known even to humans as the greatest celebration of fae. All kinds of guests would arrive from everywhere and in that night nothing mattered, everybody was intoxiated and in a good mood.

Hongjoong wanted to enjoy it freely without having to sneak away from Seonghwa all night long. Damn that elf and his effect on Hongjoong.

"I can hear you thinking over here. Stay calm. Tomorrow there will be preparations only first and we will help with those. The celebration itself is at night so you still have lots of time to distract yourself with. You will see all kinds of sprites, goblins, banshees, everything. Concentrate on that."

It was a weak consolation but Hongjoong appreciated his efforts, trying to focus.

He still had time. There was nothing to fear. Would he even get to see Seonghwa while Youjin was there? They would probably hog each other's time for the whole evening.

He flew faster, catching up to Yongguk again and enjoyed the view of the deeply snowed in forests beneath them, the white mountains in the far distance.

He still had time and a spell to use. He could do it.