[daggers - part two]
[3rd] regulus

    "No!" A scream. A commotion. Another scream sounded. "Please- have mercy- please stop!"

    Standing in the adjacent room, he covered his ears as the terrible screams of an Order member reached him. He knew this boy. He was one of his brother's best friends, who had a slightly crueler streak than that of the other Marauders, and didn't even flinch as his father and sister were killed before his eyes, when even Regulus himself did. Yet he had always stood by his friends, and that had led to him being captured.

   If only the rescue team the Order sent to the Pettigrew house had more people than two Marauders. He flinched at the memory of the murder, where the Pettigrews were captured and poor Peter was forced to watch the demise of his family. His sister's in particular was sad, and as he watched the young girl flail and plead for mercy and murmur her brother's name, hoping he would she her, but Peter didn't even move, face pale with shock. She finally bled to death via the Sectumsempra spell, and even though Regulus had scrambled to help her once the room was empty with the exception of the young girl, trying to save her life, she had already lost too much blood.

    He closed his eyes as another series of screams echoed throughout the manor. Wincing, he drew his wand, and focused on his first kiss, thinking of the innocence and happiness they once had. He thought of the young love they had once shared, the peace he once felt.

    "Expecto Patronum," he whispered, holding on to his default memory for the Patronus charm. A mesmerizing silvery blue dolphin emerged from his wand, and he was momentarily surprised- he used to have a different Patronus- but then he remembered how she used to conjure the beautiful, graceful dolphin during their nights together, and he had to suppress his thoughts about the young muggleborn.

    "Tell-" his voice cracked slightly. "Tell her and Sirius- Peter is in the Black Manor."

    He watched as the swan glided into the night sky and disappeared from view, then fell on his knees. The numbness returned, anguish filling his lungs until he couldn't breathe, and how he wished that she was there with him. He finally understood how she felt during her panic attacks, and briefly wondered how she was coping. He knew that the girl would have it worse, with her fragile state and all, and he admired how she was so brave, so willing to fight even if it destroyed her inside out.

    He shook his head, clearing his thoughts as the screams wracking the house ended and he saw Voldemort and his senior death eater posse walk out and disapparate from the manor, and he rushed into the room, then apparated Peter into his room.

    Locking the door with several enchantments and casting a muffiato charm on the door, he turned to the battered boy in front of him. The Order member narrowed his eyes at him in distrust, but the young former Slytherin merely sighed and handed him a cup of chamomile tea and some painkillers. "I'm not going to poison you, you know. I'm trying to help you."

    "Yeah, right, you're a Death Eater," Peter scoffed. "Why would you help me?"

    That hit a nerve. He spun around to face the older boy, a ferocious look in his eyes. "Have you ever thought of how many children of pureblood families are unwillingly forced into servitude for the Dark Lord?" he seethed. "Did you even consider if I wanted this or not?"

    "Sirius ran away!" Peter retorted. "If you really wanted to leave you could have done so too!"

    He was seething now. "Well, forgive me if I, unlike Sirius, try to see the good in the midst of evil in my family! I, can see how our parents were like when I was very young, can remember the rare times when they actually were good parents back when I was three, unlike Sirius who could only remember the bad things! Yes, I may not be brave enough, or reckless like my brother, but at least I'm not SELFISH like he was!"

    "Sirius is not selfish!" Peter defended.

    "He left our family without a glance and left his younger brother under the pressure and torture meant for two! This is Orion and Walburga Black we're talking about, do you actually believe that he didn't know I would be abused and tortured and forced to join to make up for his mistakes? By defying the Dark Lord, do you know how many torture sessions he has caused me? EVERYTHING he does just piles more on my shoulders!" he hissed.

    "I'm not brave like he is, but I am loyal, to those who gave me my life and even if they aren't the best to me, I would never, ever wish anything bad on them, and I couldn't disappoint them after Sirius. I am even more loyal to my-" at this he faltered, what is she to him now? Suppressing his thoughts, he continued, "my best friend, who was there for me EVERY SINGLE TIME, was a sister to me in place of Sirius even though she was even more broken than I am, even though she is on the other side right now, I still try to help the Order to the best of my abilities, not only because that is the side my heart belongs to, but also because of her!

    "Being a Death Eater does not define me, especially when I never wanted to be one. Don't judge a person by their appearance or their forced allegiance, especially when I'm trying to help you. I've already alerted Sirius as to your whereabouts." He glared at the older boy, who seemed to cower under his sudden burst of anger. "Now do you trust me?"

    With shaking hands, Peter took the tea and sipped it, then muttered, "thank you."

    Regulus didn't answer. They sat in silence for a while, before Peter asked him, "How does it feel like?"

    Caught off guard, he asked, bewildered, "W-what?"

    "Working against the side you stand for," Peter replied. "How does it feel like?"

    Numbness overtook his senses. Images flooded in his mind, of battles where he had to fight against the other side to stay alive, of the ruins of a once beautiful house, a green light flashing inside, of Lily and James fighting back to back, of Sirius perched on the edge of his, Regulus', not Sirius', bed, back in Grimmauld Place, consoling a familiar, but at the same time not, pretty young girl, who was crouching in front of a familiar open box on the floor, with tears streaking down her face. He shuddered. "Painful," he managed to croak out, feeling as though his insides were about to burn out. "But necessary. I could never let my parents down."

    "Why were you in Slytherin then?" Peter asked him. "You're more loyal than you seem to be."

    He smiled a bit, smile not really reaching his eyes. "The hat did consider both Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw, or even Gryffindor," he admitted, "but I convinced it not to. For my parents."

    Peter shook his head. "You're too loyal for your own good, like the other girl." Regulus stiffened, but Peter seemed to not take notice, as there was a commotion outside immediately. Then silence.

    The two boys stared at each other, then at the door. Silence- then there was scratching at the door.

    He unlocked the door, then stood in the corner as he watched his brother transform into his human form and take Peter away, not even once sparing a glance in his direction, and when he had gone he sat on his bed, staring at the door, and picking up a piece of parchment that had not been there before, most likely left by Sirius, and he hesitantly opened it.

    Only two words were written inside.

    I'm sorry.

    You have nothing to be sorry for, he thought, reading the familiar handwriting over and over again, and felt his emotional mask slip away as tears began to make their way across his face.
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(I'm sorry I haven't updated in ages, writer's block is the worst. I edited the chapter before this, called consolation, if you want you could go reread it, I changed quite a lot of stuff. Thank you!)