DS8Uncovered #LuMa #BearCouple #DaggerSeries

CHAPTER 57: MEMORIES

LUNA'S POV

I was jostled from my dreamless sleep. Unti-unting kong iminulat ang mabibigat na talukap ng mga mata ko. The first thing I saw was Magnus reaching for his phone as he wrapped his other arm around my shoulder. Kahit gilid ng mukha niya lang ang nakaharap sa akin ay kita ko ang lubos na pag-aalala roon.

"Mags." My voice barely came out, so it wasn't a surprise that he didn't hear me. Inangat ko ang kamay ko at ipinatong ko iyon sa dibdib niya. "Mags."

His head jerked down to look at me, and relief instantly spread on his face. Binitawan niya ang hawak niya na phone at sa pagkagulat ko ay bigla na lang niya akong ipinaloob sa mga bisig niya. He buried his face in my neck, while the hand I had placed on his chest moved rapidly up and down, matching the pace of his fast breathing.

"You scared me, LA," he whispered.

Marahang hinaplos ko ang buhok niya nang lalong lumigpit ang yakap niya sa akin. "I'm okay, hubby bear. I was just sleeping."

"I... I've been trying to wake you up for minutes and you..."

I kissed the side of his face and whispered softly, "I'm okay."

Hindi ko alam na ginigising niya ako. Hindi ko siya naririnig at hindi ko rin nararamdaman ang paghawak niya sa akin. At least not until the end.

I'm not a light sleeper, but I also don't sleep so deeply that I wouldn't respond to someone trying to wake me up. It must be the treatment. I've been more tired than I ever was before. Gusto ko na lang laging matulog.

It wasn't something I was used to. I'm always on the go, and it's rare for me to just sit down and do nothing. But these past few weeks, I have been sleeping more and more.

I don't think it was surprising. My medicines and the round of immunotherapy I'm getting make me so nauseous that it beats those times that I've drunk and partied for days when I was younger. This is the only time that it can make my hangover days useful since I'm supposed to be used to it, yet it's a completely different experience. I feel like I'm an eighty-year-old who is having an overnight sleep on a roller coaster.

"I'm here," I told him softly. "I'm not going anywhere yet."

"You're not going anywhere ever," he said firmly.

I kissed his cheek again. "Okay."

The scare I gave him and my family wasn't something they will forget anytime soon. They hover more, though I know they're trying not to. Alam kong ayaw lang din nila akong ma-overwhelm. But I understand them. Kung ako ang nasa posisyon nila ay siguradong ganoon din ako. Or I will completely shut down like I did when Magnus was hospitalized years ago because of that serial killer.

Some might think differently, but I don't regret the decisions I made when I first found out about my diagnosis. I've endured keeping it a secret for a reason. I can't imagine spending the last few years I had with them tainted by what I'm going through. I got the chance to be with them and made a lot of happy memories with them without them thinking at the back of their minds that it might be the last. At least at those moments... they get a chance to be genuinely happy.

With something like this, it's hard not to let it become who you are. It's also difficult for other people not to see it as everything that you are. Cancer doesn't just affect the body, it also changes how others perceive you. Suddenly, you're not just a person. You're a person with cancer. You're a person with limited time. Suddenly, you don't have a name. You became a diagnosis.

I've seen how people look at cancer patients. They're still fighting, and yet others look at them as if they have already lost. I know it wasn't intentional. That the pitying looks were just out of the goodness of their hearts. That they were sympathizing, and they don't mean anything bad.

We know that. But we don't want to see it every minute of the day. Especially when those minutes last for years. Kaya hindi ko rin gustong maranasan iyon mula sa pamilya ko.

I've been through it. We all did. I can still remember how our mother will smile at us, trying to hide the pain whenever we're reluctant to hug her, as if we're scared to hurt her. I remember how we're all so careful not to make a mistake so that we won't burden her more. I remember that on her good days, we're in the living room playing some silly board game and we're all laughing, but then I will look at my brothers and I will see them watching her as if they're memorizing everything so that they won't forget that moment.

I know I'm dying. I am reminded of it every day. I don't want my family to go through the same thing. So even if I can't keep hiding it from them forever, I'm happy that at least they wouldn't need to suffer with me from start to finish.

I can't speak for all cancer patients, but this is how I wanted to live what's left of my life. Some did it the way I did it, and some were accompanied by their loved ones throughout their journey. How we face it—that's the only thing left of us—the only thing left that we can control. At the end of the day, we are all battling for the upper hand, trying to fight against something that is stronger than us.

"You want something to eat?" he murmured.

I don't. I don't feel hungry anymore. I can't remember the last time I craved anything. "Donuts?"

Magnus hold on me loosened, and he pulled back to look at my face. "You really love donuts, don't you?"

"I used to eat a lot of it back in college, and back when I was just starting my career."

"Why?"

Nagkibit ako ng balikat. "Madaling bitbitin at pwede kong kainin kahit naglalakad ako. It's bread, so it's filling, and it's sweet, so it gives me a bit of a boost."

"And unhealthy if it's the only thing you eat."

Nilutan ko siya ng ilong. "Para namang sobrang healthy mo noon. Baka nga puro soft drinks lang ang laman ng tiyan mo noong nag-aaral ka pa."

His lips tugged up in a way that tells me that I'm right. He straightened and stood up. "I'll go buy some donuts."

"Sama ako."

"Gabi na."

Napakurap ako. "I'm not a minor, gramps. Ngayon mo pa ako bibigyan ng curfew kung kailan matanda na ako?"

He let out a sigh of exasperation. "Fine." Nang akmang tatayo na ako ay tinaas niya ang isa niyang kamay. "Wait for me. May kukunin lang ako."

Sinundan ko siya ng tingin nang maglakad siya papunta sa hagdanan. We were watching a TV series that I wanted to finish, but then I fell asleep before I even finished the first episode.

Magnus didn't take long, and he was back by my side again. May ibinaba siya sa tabi ko bago siya yumuko at sa pagkagulat ko ay bigla na lang niya akong sinuotan ng mahabang medyas na kulay pink.

"I don't think that's mine." Umangat ang kilay ko. "May kulay pink ka na medyas? Nice. So fetch."

Napahagikhik ako sa pagkakiliti nang padaanan niya ng daliri niya ang isa ko pang paa na wala pang suot na medyas. "It's yours. I bought a couple for you since it's getting colder."

"Aww!"

Muling napabuntong-hininga ang lalaki. Hindi ko na tinangkang kunin sa kaniya pa ang isang medyas. He'll just tell me that he doesn't do anything he doesn't like and to let him be.

When he was done with what he was doing, he pulled me up to a standing position. Kinuha niya ang kanina ay ipinatong niya sa sofa at mabilis na isinuot niya iyon sa akin. I put my arms on the sleeves of his giant-size jacket that he seems to like to make me wear, though I have my own. Hindi pa siya nakuntento roon at nilagyan niya pa ako ng scarf at beanie na kakulay ng medyas ko.

"Hubby bear?"

He remained focused on fixing the beanie on my head. "Hmm?"

"Nasa Tagaytay lang tayo. Wala tayo sa north pole."

He tapped my nose, but he didn't say anything, and instead he just reached for my hand to tangle his fingers with it. Iginaya niya ako papunta sa elevator at pumasok kami roon nang bumukas iyon.

It wasn't long before we were in a basement and inside his car, driving through the very foggy roads of Tagaytay.

"Sarado na ang mall," sabi ko sa kaniya.

"Pwede tayong bumababa sa Dasma."

I looked at him and blinked slowly. "For a donut?" I shook my head when he shrugged as if it were nothing to him. "Bukas pa ata ang Aloha Donut Cafe. Doon na lang tayo."

"Sure?"

"Donut is donut, and they have cute and yummy donuts."

Umangat at sulok ng labi niya pero hindi na siya nagkomento pa. He put the name on the navigation, and since it was near, it didn't take us long to arrive at the cafe.

Saktong pagkarating doon ay mukhang pasarado na rin ang cafe. I felt Magnus put his arm in front of my body at the same time that he stepped on the break so hard that it made a loud screeching sound.

"Stay here, LA."

Napangangang pinanood ko kung paanong halos takbuhin niya ang kinaroroonan ng empleyado na mukhang isasarado na sana ang pintuan kung hindi lang sumulpot si Magnus sa harapan niya.

"This man..." Nangingiting napailing ako. "He looks like a gallant knight ready for battle, except donuts lang ang ipinaglalaban niya ngayon."

Inalis ko ang seatbelt ko at ipinatong ko ang mga braso ko sa dashboard para magawa kong iunan ang baba ko roon habang pinapanood ang asawa kong parang nagmamakaawa sa empleyado para pagbilan siya.

Mukha namang effective dahil hindi nagtagal ay pinapasok siya sa loob ng cafe. I wasn't surprised that minutes later, when he came out, he was holding several boxes of donuts. Like ten of them.

"Let me guess," I started when he was back in the car. Kasalukuyan niyang inilalagay sa likod ang donuts. "Napapayag mo silang pagbentahan ka kasi nangako kang bibilin lahat ng natitirang donut na meron sila."

"Hmm."

"I just want one donut, Mags," I said with a sigh.

"I'll eat some."

"So you'll eat fifty-nine donuts?" Napatawa ako ng matigilan siya. He smiled sheepishly as he leaned down toward me to pull on my seatbelt. Nang maikabit niya iyon at hinalikan niya ako sa tungko ng ilong na ikinabuntong-hininga ko na lang ulit. "Let's go deliver some donuts."

Una kaming pumunta sa opisina ng Dagger. Inihinto na lang ni Magnus ang sasakyan sa tapat at siya na lang ang bumaba dala ang tatlong kahon ng Donuts. When I saw my brother, Gun, in the lobby, I opened the window. Inilabas ko ang halos kalahati ng katawan ko at kinawayan ko siya.

Sumama siya kay Magnus palabas. Magnus circled the car to get inside while Kuya Gun stood beside my window. Inilagay niya ang hintuturo niya sa noo ko at itinulak niya iyon para wala akong choice kundi bumalik sa pagkakaupo ko.

"What are you doing outside this late?"

I rolled my eyes. "Not you too. I don't have a curfew. I'm not a child."

"You're the size of one."

Sinimangutan ko siya. "Maghanap ka nga ng bata riyan na kasinglaki ko."

"Malapit ka ng mahabol ni Arctic sa height."

He wasn't wrong, which made me sulk more. "Huwag kang kakain ng donuts ha?"

"Huwag ka na ring magpapabili sa akin ng ano."

Dumiretso ang pagkakakunot ng mukha ko at matamis na nginitian ko siya. "Tatlong box iyong dinala ng asawa ko. Sa'yo iyong isang box, kuya ko na napakapogi. Tigkakalahati na lang sila tapos si Kuya Trace isang kagat lang."

Dinutdot niya ulit ang noo ko bago siya humakbang ng isa palayo sa sasakyan. I waved at him exuberantly, which he returned with a shake of his head.

Muling umandar ang sasakyan at nilingon ako ng lalaki. "Sino ang una nating pupuntahan?"

"Si Tiara muna. Siya ang pinakamalayo eh. Huli na si Lucienne."

"Bakit?"

"Gising 'yon. Kahit maglaro muna tayo sa perya, pagbalik natin gising pa rin 'yon."

He chuckled. He's probably more aware of that because I'm sure that Lucienne is one of his writers who's always awake at night to disturb him.

I sent a quick message to the group chat, telling my sisters-in-law that we're coming. Picture na lang ang sinend ko kay Circe na nilagyan iyon ng cry emoji dahil naiinggit daw siya.

Fifteen minutes later, we were pulling over Tiara and Kuya Domino's castle. Yep. It's probably smaller than a real actual castle, but still, it is a castle.

The huge doors opened, and we watched Tiara, wearing her long silk robe, run down the few stairs down with the grace that she could only do.

Binaba ko ang bintana at kinawayan ko siya. "LuMa delivery!"

She beamed and took the box I handed to her. "You didn't have to. Dapat pinadala mo na lang kay Domino."

Tinapik ko sa braso si Magnus habang nakatingin pa rin ako sa kaniya. "Nag-ba-bonding kami ng hubby bear ko."

She giggled and nodded. "Alright. Be safe, you two. Thank you for the donuts."

Pinandilatan ko siya. "Eat."

"I will. If I don't, Dom will make me. " Umakto akong nasusuka na lalo niyang ikinatawa. I really don't want to think about Kuya Dom's Dominoness.

Sumunod naming pinuntahan ay si Ember na nangangabayong sinalubong kami. Kakaiba talaga ang mga sister-in-law ko.

"Gabi na ah," sabi ko nang ibaba ko ang bintana.

Bumaba siya ng kabayo at lumapit sa amin. "I was taking them inside the barn when I saw your message." Inabot ko sa kaniya ang box na kinuha naman niya sa akin agad. "Thank you."

"I don't think it's fully vegan though." Ember's not a strict vegan, but there's probably butter in the ingredients, and Ember doesn't want to eat anything that involves any animals dying in the process.

"It's okay. I'll search about it, but if I can't eat it, Trace will."

"Ay tamang-tama. Sabi ko kay Kuya Gun, isang kagat lang ang ibigay niya kay Kuya Trace eh."

She threw her head back and laughed. Sanay na sanay na siya talaga na pinagdidiskitahan namin ang asawa niya. She doesn't get angry about it, but she sides with him often.

Magnus and I's next stop was Mireia and Kuya Axel's house. Nag-iintay na siya sa amin habang karga ang anak niya sa isang braso.

"You're heaven sent!" she exclaimed as she took the box. "I'm craving for this. Magdadrive na sana ako para bumili kasama si Pami."

"Marunong ka namang gumawa ah."

Her nose wrinkled. "Sawa na ako sa luto ko."

She owns a bakeshop so it wasn't surprising. Pero ako hindi pa sawa sa luto niya. If only I had the appetite for it.

Minutes later, we were in front of Belaya's house. Base sa sabog-sabog niyang buhok ay mukhang kagigising niya lang.

"Sorry," nakangiwing sabi ko sa kaniya nang lumapit siya sa bintana.

"It's okay. I was watching a movie anyway when I fell asleep." Inangat niya ang box ng donuts. "I'm on a diet, so this is torture, but thank you for this! I'm just going to take a bite." Nang angatan ko siya ng kilay ay ngumisi siya. "Kakagatan ko lahat ng flavors."

Ten minutes later, we were on our next stop, which was Lia and Kuya Gun's house. Like the others, she went outside to greet us. Ang pagkakaiba lang ay may dala siyang malaking paperbag.

"I made beef enchiladas, arugula salad, and mango dump cake." Kinuha niya ang box at ipinalit niya ang paper bag sa kamay ko. "Thank you for the donuts! The twins are still awake, so I'm sure they'll have some."

"That's going to be a nightmare come to life for you," I told her.

Natatawang tumango siya. "Sugar and children at this hour? Yep. Bad combination. But they wouldn't be kids for long. I'll enjoy it while it lasts."

She's such a good mother. I really wish they'd have another one just like she wanted. Maybe a boy this time para naman hindi sumabog ang ulo ni Kuya Gun dahil puro babae ang anak nila ni Lia.

"Last stop?" Magnus asked when Lia went back inside the house.

"Yup! Sana lang hindi natin maistorbo ang momentum ni Lucienne. Hindi pa naman sumasagot sa chat. Baka bigla na lang tayong sagpangin no'n."

"Don't worry. I won't let her bite you."

"Aww."

"Ako lang ang pwede."

Another part of me awwed at his comment. Kay gabing kay harot na naman po.

When we pulled over to their house, I was ready to knock on the door, but to my surprise, Lucienne went out looking more disheveled than Belaya. I rolled down the window and looked at her in confusion. "Bakit mukhang dinaanan ka ng tornado?"

She let out a giggle that made me want to scratch my ears out. Especially when Kuya Thorn appeared behind her.

I almost half-tossed the box to her, which she thankfully managed to catch. Nanlalaki ang mga matang nilingon ko si Magnus. "Let's go! I need new eyes! I need a new brain! I need to relocate to Mars!"

Tatawa-tawang pinaandar ni Magnus ang sasakyan. Nakalayo na kami ay tumatawa pa rin siya dahilan para tapunan ko siya ng masamang tingin.

"It's not funny!" I hissed.

He chortled. "It kinda is."

Nakanguso na lumingon ako sa bintana. When I wasn't content just looking, I decided to roll down the window again so that I could feel the cool air on my face.

I was expecting Magnus to nag at me, but he didn't. When we stopped at the stoplight, I turned to look at him, and I found him watching me intently.

"What?" I asked, inclining my head to the side.

He shook his head. "You look happy."

"I am."

"Then that's enough."

"Hmm?"

He took my hand and kissed it. "Then that's enough for me. The memories of you happy."

_____________________End of Chapter 57.