#DS7Unbalanced #InoCent #SMCouple #DaggerSeries

CHAPTER TEN: KALEIDOSCOPE

TIARA'S POV

I was in the glass house, but I ran out of water, so I was on my way to the kitchen to refill my Hydro Flask when I noticed that the main door was open. Rinig ko mula roon ang boses ni Domino na may kausap na kung sino.

My curiosity won over my desire to hide from Domino. Yesterday, after I had breakfast with him, I returned to the glass house to empty my mind again, but it didn't work out. I kept thinking about the way he is with me and how I feel about the things he does.

When dancing didn't help, I shut myself in my room. Then, at dinner, I pretended that I fell asleep. He didn't try to wake me up, but he left a tray of food outside my door.

Bahagyang sumilip ako sa pinto. I saw him with Trace, Coal, and Gun. I didn't want my presence to be known, but it seems impossible when it comes to him. Para kasing may radar siya pagdating sa akin.

He stopped talking to his brothers, and he turned in my direction. A smile instantly spread on his lips the moment our eyes met.

Damn it.

"Nandito na ang mga gamit mo," paliwanag niya at itinuro ang ilang mga kahon na nasa tabi ng paanan ni Trace. "And we have visitors. We can send them away if you want."

Bago pa ako makasagot ay bumukas ang pintuan ng malaking van. There's a medium-sized cargo trailer attached to the back of it.

"Hindi ka na ma-reach ngayon," nakangusong sabi ni Lucienne na tumalon pababa ng sasakyan. Sa likod niya ay kumaway sa direksyon ko ang iba pang mga babae. "Sabi niyo noong isang araw pwede kaming pumunta."

Napailing si Domino. "Akala ko kasi mahihiya kayo at palilipasin niyo muna ang linggo na 'to."

"Si Lush mahihiya? Wala sa bokabularyo niya 'yan. Kahit ipa-spell mo pa." Natatawang nilingon ni Trace si Lucienne. "Spell "shy"."

Ngumisi ang babae at nilagay niya sa tapat ng magkabila niyang pisngi ang mga kamao niya. She made a cute expression. "Shy, shy, shy!"

"Tignan niyo?" he said, grinning. He looked at the woman again. "Spell "walang hiya"."

Para bang estudyante na natawag ng teacher na nagtaas ng kamay si Lucienne. "T-R-A-C-E. Walang hiya!"

I couldn't stop the laughter that bubbled out of me. I wasn't the only one, because a wave of giggles could be heard coming from the van.

Nilagay ni Lucienne ang kamay niya sa beywang niya at tinaasan niya ng kilay si Domino. "Thorn cleared us. He said we could go, but we can't stay overnight."

"Why?" I asked before Domino could speak.

"My husband didn't say much, but according to him, you have a sensitive case. Just in case this place would be compromised, though it's very unlikely, we wouldn't be a person of interest. Para rin daw sa security mo. After all, we're basically strangers to you."

I immediately understood what she meant. It's been known for people on the inside to provide access and information to a possible culprit.

I gave her a small smile. "It's unlikely that any of you will try to help someone kidnap or kill me. You'll gain nothing from it, so I doubt there will be any motive."

"That's true, but they are being extra cautious this time." Nginuso niya ang direksyon ni Domino. "Lalo na ang isang 'yan."

I glanced quickly at Domino, and I saw him watching me. Kaagad na nag-iwas ako ng tingin.

"I don't mind having you all here," I said in a quiet voice. "If it's okay with Domino."

I don't mind being around people, though it would be rare for me to start a conversation. I am shy around strangers, but I don't get nervous about being watched. I have a profession where I get to be watched by thousands of people. I love my alone time, but I have the kind of life that often subjects me to the gaze of many. But it's not the reason that I want them here.

It's because I don't want to be alone with Domino. Dahil sa lahat ng tao sa mundo, siya lang ang bukod tangi na kayang gumulo sa sistema ko. He's the only one that makes me want to let go... to open my palms that are tightly clenched together, refusing to let the power of control slip away from my grasp.

My attention went to the van when Mireia stepped out. "Pa-experience naman ng palasyo mo, Dom. Hindi kasi kami na-inform na pangarap mo pa lang maging hari."

"I'm not surprised," Circe said when she followed the woman out. "A king rules over everything and everyone in his vast dominion. We all know Dom's unique... lifestyle."

"I wish I didn't," lukot ang ilong na sabi ni Luna, Domino's younger and only sister.

Lifestyle? Anong ibig nilang sabihin?

Nagtatakang nilingon ko ang lalaki. He's still watching me, but this time his eyebrow is raised as if challenging me to ask him the question that is clearly circling in my mind.

Para bang napaso na napapitlag ako. Nag-iinit ang mukha na pilit na nginitian ko ang pamilya ni Domino. "You should come inside. I'll take care of my things first—"

A gentle pat stopped me from finishing my sentence. When I looked up, Domino was already beside me, his hand on my head. "Go with them, doll. Kami na ang bahala sa mga gamit mo."

My lips parted, but all I could do was nod. Fortunately, it was then that Lucienne hooked her arm with mine. Hinayaan ko siyang tangayin ako papasok ng bahay habang ang iba pa niyang mga kasama ay nakasunod sa amin.

A series of "wows" could be heard, and I couldn't blame them. Domino's house is a character. I could already imagine what it would look like once everything was done. I wonder if I will get to see this place when that moment comes.

"Hey, guys. Iyong mga pagkain muna ang unahin niyo please!" Lia called out from the door.

"We brought lunch," Lucienne explained to me. "Wala nga lang nakapagluto sa amin—"

"Kung makapagsalita siya para namang kasali siya sa mga nagluluto," pang-aasar ni Trace na may dalang mga paper bag. "Last time na nag-attempt ka na magluto pakiramdam ko nasilip ko ang impyerno ng five seconds."

Binigyan siya ng matalim na tingin ng babae. "Hindi dahil 'yon sa luto ko. Ang tawag doon, foreshadowing." Lucienne turned to me. "As I was saying, hindi nakapagluto sila Lia kasi nanggaling pa sila ng Manila ni Gun. Mireia brought desserts from TDN though."

"TDN?"

"The Dawson's Nook. Café ni Mireia."

We watched as the men brought in the food. Huling pumasok si Domino na may dalang apat na kahon ng pizza. Sa coffee table niya pinalagay ang mga pagkain. We wouldn't all fit inside the kitchen, even if it were very spacious. Wala pa kasing dining table ang bahay dahil hindi pa rin tapos ayusin ang dining area.

I glanced at the women, and my eyes widened in surprise. The night I had dinner with them, they told me about their respective jobs. I also searched about them on the internet, and I found out how popular they all are. Pero ngayon ay para bang wala lang sa kanila na basta na lang silang sumalampak sa sahig para maupo palibot sa coffee table at umabot ng pagkain.

"Kapag nalaman ng mga asawa niyong nakaupo kayo sa sahig mapapagalitan ako," napapabuntong-hininga na sabi ni Domino bago siya bumaling sa akin. Inangat niya ang dala niyang box. "Domino's o ako?"

Napanganga ako nang mabasa ko ang nakasulat sa kahon ng pizza. Domino's.

Malakas na tinapik siya sa likod ng ulo ni Coal. "Mamaya ka na humarot. Kailangan nila kuya ng tulong sa labas."

Ibinaba ni Domino ang kahon ng pizza at kinindatan ako bago sumunod sa kapatid niya. This man really would be the death of me.

Lucienne pulled me to the sofa, and she made me sit between her and Mireia. Walang nakaupo sa single couch na nasa magkabilang gilid ng coffee table dahil nakapatong doon ang ilang mga pagkain na hindi na nagkasya sa coffee table.

The women started eating, but my attention was pulled to the men who were carting things inside the house.

Even now, I couldn't help but be fascinated by the resemblances between the siblings. They might have different builds, but no one could deny that they are all ripped and sculpted. They are also larger than life. And unbelievably handsome.

But for some reason, my gaze keeps returning in Domino's direction. I couldn't help but watch his movements. How his shirt stretched across his broad chest, how the well-defined muscles on his arms became more pronounced when he was carrying something heavy, and the way his pants clung to his powerful legs.

"Tiara? Anong gusto mo?"

Through ballet, I have felt a man's arm around me what felt like a hundred times. I have experienced what it's like to be carried. But I haven't felt like the air in the room is thinning, the warmth on my face is intensifying into burning, and not even once that my heart has fluttered.

Only because of him am I coming across these feelings that before didn't exist in my world. Mga pakiramdam na ayokong makilala. It was when he came into my life that things started changing. When one night our paths crossed. This man who could make me feel so much. This man that scares the hell out of me. This man named—

"Tiara?"

"Domino," I whispered without realizing it. Napakurap ako at napatingin ako sa mga kasama ko. Almost all of them are in mid-bite. They are also staring at me as if I had grown three heads. "I-I... I mean... iyong pizza. Gusto ko ng Domino's pizza."

"Bakit mo pa kailangan ng pizza kung nandito naman ako?"

Nag-init ang mukha ko nang makita kong nakalapit na pala sa amin ang lalaki na walang dudang narinig ang pinag-uusapan namin.

"Do you have pepperoni? Cheese? Olives?" sunod-sunod na tanong ko. "You don't, right? That... that pizza however, has everything."

"Kaya ko ring tapatan 'yan." He gestured his whole body with his hand. "Kahit ano pwede. Kahit lagyan mo pa ako ng unlimited toppings, at hindi katulad ng pizza na 'yan, hindi ako nauubos. Ready to deliver anytime."

Napangiwi si Circe na kasalukuyang kumakain ng pizza. Ibinaba niya iyon. "I don't like the image that my mind created just now against my will."

"Parang ayoko ng kumain ng pizza kahit kailan," nakatulala kay Domino na sabi ni Belaya.

"I agree," Ember said. "Even the vegan one."

"I think I turned deaf and blind," Luna said while shaking her head from side to side. "Amnesia! Kailangan ko ng amnesia!"

Napapalatak na isinarado ulit ni Lucienne ang takip ng pizza box. "Akala ko hindi ko kayang mawalan ng ganang kumain kapag libre."

Mireia nodded in agreement. "I heard about chocolate and whipped cream, pero hindi ko akalain na pati pizza ay pwedeng maging malaswa."

All eyes went to Lia when she made a little noise. Pulang pula ang mukha niya dahilan para malaglag ang panga ng mga babaeng Dawson.

"Oh my gosh," Belaya whispered.

Luna covered her ears. "Nope. I'm not going to listen to this. Ayokong marinig kung paanong ginawang malaswa ni Kuya Gun ang pizza."

Lia shyly looked down at her hands. "Technically, it wasn't pizza yet. Gagawa pa lang sana kami."

Namilog ang mga mata ko nang magawa kong maintindihan ang pinag-uusapan nila. I heard about couples being creative and adventurous when it comes to their... activities. Like Mireia, I heard about chocolate and whipped cream. Merong iba na ice cream. But pizza?

Pinaningkitan ko ng mga mata si Domino. This is his fault. He's the one who opened up about the topic of being a... pizza. The naughty kind. Ngumisi lang siya at kumindat bago siya tumalikod para balikan ang mga kapatid niya. Mukhang ayaw niya rin marinig ang pinag-uusapan. It involves his brother after all.

"What do you mean na gagawa pa lang sana kayo ng pizza?" tanong ni Lucienne. "Paano 'yon? Ginawa kang rolling pin ni Gun?"

I couldn't help but join the other women when they all burst out laughing.

"Basta," namumula pa rin na sabi ni Lia.

Napailing na lang si Lucienne. "Dragon couple strikes again." She grinned at me. "Dinalan pala kita ng kopya ng mga libro ko. Basahin mo ha? Dawson 101 ang mga 'yon."

"Dawson 101?"

"Let's just say that when you feel confused or doubtful, you can just read one of those books, and maybe it could help you get some clarity about why a Dawson acts the way he does."

"Or she," singit ni Luna.

"Saka ka na." Ngumuso si Lucienne. "Ayaw mo pang ikuwento sa akin ang napaka-secretive mong buhay ng pag-ibig."

The youngest Dawson shrugged her shoulders. "Tutal nag-overtake ako at naunang ikasal, pauunahin ko na si Kuya Domino na magkaroon ng libro."

Habang nagpapalipat-lipat sa kanila ang tingin ko ay nakaramdam ako ng pagtapik sa balikat ko. Mireia's gentle smile greeted me when I turned to look at her. "Don't worry. You'll understand it one day."

"Understand what exactly?"

Instead of answering me, her smile just widened. Kumuha siya ng tissue at binuksan niya ang kahon ng pizza. She took a slice of pizza and handed it to me. "Pepperoni and cheese. Wala nga lang olives."

Nananatiling nakatingin lang ako sa hawak ko. At this very moment, something hit me. Something that makes me feel weird and out of place.

"Control what you eat, Tiara. You don't want to lose ballet, do you? The world only sees us through our beauty, and we claim the world through our bodies. Ballet depends on both of those. You'll lose everything if you don't pull yourself together."

"Tiara?" Kunot ang noo na nagbaba ng tingin si Mireia sa pagkain. "Do you want a different flavor?"

"If you don't have ballet, then what would you be? Who would you be? Do you have anything more than this?"

The answer that fell from my mouth wasn't just an answer to Mireia's question but also to the voice of my mother that came from my memory. "N-No."

My chest started to rise and fall quicker than normal, and rapid breaths escaped my parted lips. I feel like the world around me is shrinking while my head is expanding to accommodate my racing thoughts.

"Meni potribno vyjty zvidsy," I whispered. I need to get out of here.

"What happened?"

"I don't know, Dom. I gave her a slice of pizza and—"

Tumayo ako dahilan para maputol sa pagsasalita si Mireia. Before any of them could move, I walked away from them, my feet taking me in the direction of the glass house.

I took in a huge breath when I managed to get inside the confines of the glass house. Pero hindi pa ako nagtatagal doon nang maramdaman ko ang kamay sa braso ko na pumigil sa akin na makahakbang pa papasok.

When I looked up, my gaze met Domino's worried ones. "What's wrong, doll?"

"I... I just need to do something."

Hindi niya ako pinakawalan at nananatiling nakatingin lang siya sa akin. "Don't lie to me, Tiara," he said, his voice gentle.

"I'll be back. May kukunin lang ako saglit."

"Tiara—"

"For god's sake! Why don't you just let me go?! Why can't you just leave me alone?!"

The words slipped out before I could stop them. Bumakas ang gulat sa mga mata niya sa naging pagtaas ng boses ko. He wasn't the only one. We were both taken aback by my outburst.

Domino's eyes gentled. There wasn't any annoyance or any sign that he was losing patience. There was only understanding in them.

He stepped closer, and he raised his hand towards me as if to touch me. But he didn't. As if he knew that I needed the space. Instead, he just leaned closer, his voice soft, like a soothing warmth embracing the storms of emotions inside me. "I tried, but I don't think I can anymore."

I shake my head. The speed of the changes... the shifting... are sending my entire being into turmoil. Every fiber of my being wanted to fight it. It was the smart thing to do. Because it isn't just possible.

How could this man, who not long ago was just a stranger to me, make me feel all these things? How could he have this much sway over my mind and heart? How can he make me want to hope that my fear was just an imaginary limitation and that the possibility that this could be real is more fluid and limitless?

"Tell me," he demanded gently. "What happened inside?"

My eyes misted over. "I don't belong there. I'm not... I'm not like them. I don't have a normal life."

"Tiara—"

"You know what's funny? In there, I just realized how different I was over a mere pizza. Because at my age right now, I never had one. I never tasted one. It was even the first time I experienced holding it."

"Tiara, doll," he murmured.

"But it's okay. I was okay. I have everything I need. But all these? This can ruin everything for me. This could take away everything that I have."

"A slice of pizza wouldn't ruin—"

"It's not just about the pizza!" Pumiksi ako para pakawalan niya ako at tinalikuran ko siya. I massaged my temple with my hand before I turned to him again. "I'm sorry. It's not your fault. It's not anyone's fault. You're just being generous and kind to me."

"Tiara..."

I smiled at him bitterly. "I'm trying not to understand, not to see, but it's not like I can be oblivious forever. I know that there's something happening here. I know that you want me. I feel that you feel for me in a way that I can't comprehend. Not this early. Not this fast." Sunod-sunod na umiling ako. "But I can't. I can't be in there and meet your family. I can't like them more than I already do. I can't do it."

"And with me," he said through gritted teeth.

"Most especially with you."

"Why?"

"Because I can't let go. I won't let go. I wouldn't be a fool. I promised that to myself since I was young. If I let go, if I lost control, I would lose the one thing that's only been mine. I don't need anything. I just need ballet. And I won't destroy that."

"Sweet doll, please breathe for me." Humakbang siya palapit sa akin pero umatras lang ako. "There are a lot of things to unpack here, and I will be with you when you do that. I know that between your situation and these things between us, it could be really overwhelming. I was trying my best not to do that, and I'm sorry that I'm not doing well with it. I promise to check on myself in the future. But please, let me hold you for awhile."

I shook my head, and I took another step backward. "You don't understand," I whispered with a quiver in my voice. "Can you honestly say that you want me? This version of me that will just suddenly lose it over a slice of pizza? Someone who can't even sit across from you or beside you and share a meal with you without any drama?" With a trembling hand, I pointed towards the house. "You deserve a woman like them. A woman who can sit on the floor and still look beautiful. A woman that fits in with the rest of your family. And a woman who can smile so brightly because she's not broken. Because no matter how you paint a broken glass with gold, it doesn't change anything. No one can love shards of glass. The person who tries will just end up bleeding while picking it up, and the glass will shatter more when it escapes the grasp of the hand that tried to hold it only to fall to the ground again."

Silence shrouds us. It was as if time were suspended as my words lingered around us, the weight of them heavy and suffocating. Domino's eyes were flashing with emotions, and he held me through his unwavering gaze.

Seconds passed by, and we just stood there, not saying anything. We were only a few steps apart, but it feels like he's miles away. But the distance immediately diminished when he crossed the distance between us, and I found myself imprisoned in his strong arms.

"I don't care if you lose your mind over pizza. I wouldn't fucking care if you cried over a blueberry. You want to scream at me because of a salad? I wouldn't care one bit. You find it hard to sit across from me or beside me when we are eating together? Next time, I'll make you sit on my lap and feed you." He ignored the way I froze with his words, and instead his arms tightened around me. "You don't need to fit in my family. Those women? They also don't. They all have different personalities. Different backgrounds. Iba-iba sila ng pinagdaanan. And once you know them, once you know more about their stories, more than they shared to you, you'll realize that none of them went through life without knowing what it's like to break. But even through all that, they are the way they are now. Just like how you see them. They shine brightly despite the darkness that once touched their lives."

"Domino—"

"Family don't need to fit in to belong. They complement each other."

A lone tear fell from my eyes, and as if he could feel it, his arms loosened, but not to let go of me. His fingers felt like feathers on my cheek as he wiped away the wetness.

"I was never unaware. I could see you. I have always been. We could both see the brokenness. You look at it in a mirror, I can see it through you. But we look at it differently." He cupped my cheeks, his gaze full of tenderness. "Shards of glass make a beautiful kaleidoscope, Tiara."

As we stood there, the silence loud with unspoken words, he leaned down. His face crossed the small distance between us, and in the next second, his lips claimed mine.

He felt warm and soft, but more than that, his kiss felt like an embrace of solace. It fills me with something that seems to touch my deepest wounds that I have buried inside me, and it washes away the fears, the anguish, and the doubts.

I know that all of these don't mean that I'm all healed up. That everything is suddenly okay. But for a moment... for one single moment, I stopped caring that it wasn't. I stopped caring if my world would fall apart.

It was his kiss that felt like a peaceful reprieve from the chaos of my life that makes breaking not feel as daunting as before.

Shards of glass make a beautiful kaleidoscope.