#DaggerSeries #LiaxGun #DS2Unstrung

CHAPTER 6: WISH I WAS BETTER

LIA'S POV

Fire is a fascinating thing. It can show you how magnificent it is in just a blink of an eye. No matter how beautiful the creation... no matter how big or powerful, it will all end in destruction with just one lick of its flame, consuming everything it touches. Anything could turn into nothing. A perfect masterpiece can vanish into dust, the present could become just a memory, and an evidence to condemn the wicked can burn away.

"Lia."

Naririnig ko ang pag-aalala sa boses na nagsalita pero nananatili lang akong nakatingin sa lugar na naglalaman ng bangungot ko. I pulled the blanket around me tighter when I saw a couple of police officers got out of the cabin while carrying a covered stretcher with them.

Mariin kong ipinikit ang mga mata ko. Naramdaman ko ang paghawak ng pamilyar na mga kamay sa akin pero lumayo lang ako.

It's hard enough. It's hard enough that I'm living a nightmare. A nightmare where I keep on losing everything. I don't need to have a reminder of what I also lost before.

"Shit, shit, shit!"

Hindi ko magawang lingunin si Elias na palakad-lakad kanina pa. Kasama niya sina Sam, Arthur, at River na umuwi sa cabin. They are the one who saw the cabin up in flames. They called the police at the same time that Gun did while he and I were still at the gasoline station. Napag-alaman ng lalaki ang nangyari at dadalin sana niya ako sa ospital bago bumalik sa cabin para alamin ang mga nangyari but I insisted on going with him. I needed to see. I needed to see because Maddison was my responsibility and I failed her.

Now here we are, the sun almost peeking from the sky, yet it was like there's gloom of darkness still surrounding this place that witnessed the messed up things that took place.

"You need to get check out," mahinang sabi ni Gun sa akin.

"I'm fine. I just want to get this over with."

"Lia."

Malamig na tingin ang ipinukol ko sa kaniya. I want to be enveloped in his arms. To feel the sense of security that immediately surrounded me when I found my way to him. Isang yakap niya lang parang napawi lahat ng takot... lahat ng sakit.

But I'm not stupid. I know that it was just temporary.

Everything that I feel for him, it's like a drug. I will want more... I will ask for more. And I shouldn't. I can't do that to myself and to him again.

"He just slapped, punched, and strangled me."

"Your clothes-"

"He didn't raped me if that's what you want to know."

His face darkened with anger. Kita ko ang paglabasan ng ugat sa mga kamay niya dahil sa pagkakakuyom ng mga iyon. "If you think that what he did is okay just because he didn't raped you, Lia, then you need to think again."

I want to ask him why he's concern for someone that he can't even stand to look at. Gusto kong tanungin kung bakit nandito pa siya ngayong nandito naman na ang mga pulis.

But I guess Gun will always be Gun even if it is me that is involve in the situation. He takes care of people. Kung wala siguro ang Dagger ay walang duda na papasok siya sa police academy o sa militar. He always has a soft spot when it comes to people that are being taken advantage of, people that lost their power, and those that are living in fear. His sense of justice has always been admirable.

Kaya sa kabila ng galit niya ay nananatili siya sa tabi ko. Because that's just who he is.

Nag-iwas ako ng tingin sa lalaki nang maramdaman ko ang paglapit sa amin nang isa sa mga pulis na nakita kong pumasok sa cabin pagkatapos maapula ng mga bumbero ang apoy.

"Detective Ivan Bradley, homicide unit," he said as a greeting and extended his hand towards my direction. I reached for his hand tentatively. "I have a few questions, Miss Asterio."

"Lia."

Napakurap ang lalaki, "Sorry?"

"You can just call me, Lia. I don't like my surname. I'm just Lia."

Bahagyang tumango ang lalaki at tumingin sa mga taong nakapaligid sa akin. Nang mukhang napagtanto niya na walang balak lumayo sa akin ang team ko at si Gun ay muli siyang nagsalita. "Forensics will work on the crime scene to preserve possible evidences."

"Is that possible?" I murmured.

"Maaaring may natitira pang ebidensiya but we really can't promise anything. A team from arson will also be working on this case."

There's a reason why arson was called. Though arson is hard to prove this is not a typical arson case and it didn't certainly started as one. This is a homicide through and through.

"He... he wanted to erase traces of evidences."

"Yes, he did," Detective Bradley agreed. "It wasn't just an impulse action on the perpetrator's part. We found containers of materials used for the fire."

"You mean to say he planned to kill me?"

"Or to bury evidences that will trace back to him when he abduct you." Tumingin ang lalaki sa hawak na tablet device. "You reported to the police that someone was stalking you, am I right? It's been going on for more than two years."

Ramdam ko ang pagbigat nang atmospera at hindi ko napigilang mapatingin kay Gun. I saw Gun angry a couple of times when we were together. He has a temper and I often pissed him off. But his anger were rarely pointed at me but when it was me he's angry at, it's never been like what I'm seeing now. Like he can break and pulverized anyone that his anger is directed at.

"Yes. I've been receiving the same music box again and again. Noong una sa PO box lang, then I received one again nang may mag-iwan sa agency ko, another was given to the guard at the recording studio, then at my concert last year, and two weeks ago I saw one on top of the hood of my car."

"Did you received another one today?"

"I did but I saw... I-I saw him first with Maddy. I think he thought that she was me. Nagpalit kami ng damit sa party dahil natapunan ako ng inumin. She went back here at the cabin kasi pagod na rin kami talaga dahil sa event but I stayed because I was with someone."

I took another glance at Gun when his anger flared up again but for some reason this one felt different. Like part of it was directed at me.

"Nakita niyo ba ang musix box?" tanong ko.

"We're not sure yet. A lot were damaged in the fire."

"I-I used that... I used that to get away. That's why there's blood on my clothes. His mask was different. It was screen-like but it's hard to see the face behind it. But I don't think the material of his mask really soaked up his blood because some of them dropped to me." Nagbaba ako ng tingin sa damit ko na may mga tulo ng dugo. "Posible ba na magamit niyo ito?"

"It would be helpful," he said and gave me a small smile. "I'll ask someone to take it from you after you change your clothes."

Pinagsalikop ko ang mga kamay ko nang maramdaman ko ang panginginig no'n. Naramdaman kong may umupo sa tabi ko at nalingunan ko si River na hinawakan ang kamay ko at mahigpit na pinisil iyon. I felt my eyes got blurry with tears but I held it in. There's a right place to cry and I can't do that here.

"Can I ask when did Maddison left the party?" Detective Bradley asked again.

"I'm not sure. About eleven o'clock I guess."

"And when did you get back to the cabin?"

"It was twelve. It was minutes away from midnight when I'm walking home with someone. When he left, hindi ako kaagad pumasok ng cabin. Nakaupo lang ako sa lounger sa labas nang ilang minuto but when it started to get cold I decided to go inside. The door was unlocked which was weird and when I came in the place was dark. May narinig akong boses kaya naglakad ako papunta sa kuwarto at doon ko nakita... doon ko nakita si Maddy."

Kahit mahirap balikan ang mga nangyari ay pilit kong sinalaysay nang buo ang mga nangyari lalo na ang mga narinig kong sinabi ng lalaki.

"He was surprised when he saw me at the door. Maddy told me to run and she tried to get away but that man managed to grabbed her. Hindi ko nagawang makalabas kasi... kasi tinutukan niya ng kutsilyo si Maddy. I wanted to help her... I-I didn't want... I didn't-"

Lalong humigpit ang pagkakahawak sa akin ni River habang may simpatya sa mukha na bahagyang umuklo ang detective.

"It's okay, Lia. We don't need to rush."

"N-No. No. I need to do everything that will help find that man. Kailangan niyang pagbayaran ang ginawa niya kay Maddy. You need to find him." Tuluyan nang bumagsak ang mga luha mula sa mga mata ko. Nilingon ko ang mga kasamahan ko at kita ko ang sari-saring repleksyon ng sakit sa mga mukha nila. When I looked back at Detective Bradley I know that the fear in my eyes are visible. "It's not just, Maddy, Detective. He's planning to hurt my whole team. H-He said... he said that if it wasn't for them, the world wouldn't know me. He said that they need to pay for helping."

I knifed up from I was sitting as if I wanted to run away. Inangat ko ang mga kamay ko at isinabunot ko iyon sa buhok ko. "They will hurt them. I can't let that happen. I can't..."

Naramdaman kong may mga braso na pumalibot sa akin at nang mag-angat ako ng tingin ay imbis na si River ang nabungaran ko ay ang nakita ko ay si Gunter na nakatingin kay Detective Bradley. "I'll take it from here."

"Dawson-"

"You can do whatever you're tasked to do, Bradley, but Dagger will take the case."

Bumuntong-hininga ang lalaki na mukhang alam na hindi siya mananalo sa determinasyon ni Gun. He looked at all our faces and stopped when his gaze zeroed on me enveloped in Gun's arms. "Very well. But we'll provide patrols for her team."

"We will also provide protection."

No. He shouldn't get involve. "Gun..."

Nagbaba ng tingin sa akin ang lalaki na nananatiling nakayakap sa akin. "You're not safe, Lia, and we can make sure that you will be."

Hindi ko nagawang makaimik sa sinabi niya. This started as stalking but it ended with murder. This is not something that I can handle alone. Not when the lives of my team are all at stake. I know what Dagger could do. I know that for years they've been one of the best on their field.

But will it that be easy? Will they really help me when I know that they all hate me?

"You're going with me." Gun said definitely.

"My car..."

"I'll go back for it."

"I can take care of the car, Lia." Lumingon ako kay Sam na siyang nagsalita. There's a haunted look in his eyes but he forced himself to smile. "You left your bag at Arthur's car right?"

We parked my car here at the resort before going to the benefit concert. Kay Arthur at Sam na ako sumabay para hindi na rin maraming sasakyan ang dala namin. I left my bag with my keys inside in his car and I was planning on getting it before they leave today. Nasa akin naman kasi ang phone ko kaya wala namang problema sa akin na iwan iyon.

"Yes."

"We'll take care of it. Ipapadala na lang din namin sa iyo ang bag mo bukas. I'll contact..." Hindi pa natatapos ng lalaki ang sasabihin ay inabutan na siya ni Gun ng calling card. "We'll contact him so we can send you your things."

"Sam-"

Hinawakan niya ako sa balikat at marahang pinisil niya iyon. "You need to rest, Lia. We will be okay. Kami ng bahala sa mga kakailanganin para... para kay Maddy."

"Responsibilidad ko siya."

"Respondibilidad ka rin namin."

His voice was firm as if he's not taking no for an answer. Wala na akong nagawa kundi bumuntong-hininga na lang. Nang mukhang makita niya na wala na akong balak mag reklamo pa ay muli niyang pinisil ang balikat ko bago ako pinakawalan. Arthur took this chance to quickly hug me, followed by Miggy who's eyes are red from crying.

"We'll find him," he whispered.

I nodded, trying not to let the tears fall from my own eyes. "We will."

We need to. We need to find that person to make him pay for what he did. I can't let him harm anyone else in my life again. Because he's wrong. He doesn't own me and he never will.

He needs to pay.

For Maddy.

THE MOMENT that I entered Gunter's car, that's when it completely dawn on me what he meant earlier. He said that Dagger will take care of my case and I understand that. But there's one thing I'm not sure I understand.

"Where are you taking me?" I asked him when he started the engine of his car.

"Headquarters."

Pakiramdam ko lumaki ang ulo ko sa sinabi niya at napamulagat ako. "I can't go there."

"Put on your seat belt, Lia."

"I need to go home."

"Seat belt."

"Gun-"

Hindi ko na nagawang tapusin ang gusto kong sabihin nang dumukwang siya sa kinauupuan ko. He reached for the seat belt, his body too close to me. Kulang na lang ay ibaon ko ang sarili ko sa upuan para magawa kong makalayo sa kaniya. I can feel the heat from his body and I can smell his intoxicating smell.

Nagawa ko lang pakawalan ang pinipigil ko na pala na hininga nang marinig ko ang mahinang tunog na nagmula sa seat belt na naikabit na niya. He turned to his own and attached it before starting the car.

"Gun, I can't stay there."

"Bakit hindi?"

I was taken aback by his question. I don't understand why he's asking when the answer is so obvious. "I just can't."

"What do you expect? After a stalker went after you, do you really think you can go back home as if nothing happens?"

My lips parted in disbelief by what he said. "Akala mo ba wala lang sa akin ang nangyari? Do you think I can just live my life normally after this? Mukha bang normal ang nakalipas na mga taon para sa akin? I can't even go anywhere without feeling that someone is watching me."

"Then that's your answer. You can't go home."

"I need to!"

"For fuck sake why?"

I ignored his flaring temper. "Someone's waiting for me there and I need to go home."

Kita ko kung paanong namuti ang ang mga kamay niya sa higpit nang pagkakahawak niya sa manibela ng sasakyan. "If you mean your latest conquest then tell him to wait."

"What?"

"I don't care if he's the president's son. Tell him to wait."

Naguguluhang tinignan ko siya. How does he even know Damian? Wala naman akong binanggit kanina na pangalan.

"I need to go home, Gun."

"No."

"Paano kung pumunta sa bahay ko ang stalker na iyon?"

"Your life is more important than whatever you're afraid he's going to steal. And for Salazar, just tell him not to go to your home."

"He doesn't even know my home!" I said loudly in agitation. "I need to go home now!"

"No."

"Why do you even care?!"

I was almost screaming by this point. This is not new to me. Hindi ko na mabilang kung ilang beses kaming nagtalo noon ni Gun. We both have tempers and we just can't help it that we can argue about the little things.

Some might think it's a start of a toxic relationship, but they're wrong. Gun and I never let the day pass that we're still pissed about something. Hindi rin naman kasi kami nagtatalo to the point na may masasakit na kaming nasasabi sa isa't-isa.

Usually we just argue about things that are not a big deal. I was young, impatient, and impulsive while he's older than me and more responsible by far. He can be possessive and me... well I sometimes can be a pain in the ass.

The only time that we fought about something that is not only big but has a colossal effect in our relationship was when we broke up.

"Stop asking me stupid questions."

"No. I want to know! Why do you care, Gun? You hate me and we all know that. Why didn't you just let the police handle this? I'm not your responsibility anymore!"

"I don't hate you."

"Yes you do!"

"I don't."

"You do-"

"I'm not the one who left, Lia. I don't hate you. I just don't want to see you."

Natigilan ako sa sinabi niya. How could he not hate me after everything that I've done? I even hate myself for that.

Hindi niya ako gustong makita sa parehas na rason kung bakit sa kabila ng katotohanan na maliit ang mundo ay sinisiguro ko na hindi magkukrus ang landas namin ulit. Except for that one time. That one foolish time.

I didn't want to see him because I know that I hurt him. But all along I thought that came with that is the hate that he has for me.

"If that stalker go to my home, I don't want him to find my sitter in there and give him another reason to harm anyone in my life," I whispered.

Napahawak ako sa pintuan ng sasakyan ng lumikha nang maingay na tunog ang sasakyan nang basta na lang siyang nag preno at itinabi iyon.

"What the hell, Gun!"

Galit na nilingon ko siya pero sa pagtataka ko ay may gulat na ekspresyon sa mga mata niya habang nakatingin sa akin.

"Sitter?"

Hindi ko maintindihan ang mga emosyon na nakabalatay sa mukha niya. Frankly, I'm too tired to even comprehend. But if I can't stop him from whisking me away from whatever place he wants then fine but I'm not going anywhere without my baby.

"Yes. My baby's sitter. So if you could please just take me home."

______________________________End of Chapter 6.