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"So do you live alone?" He asked once she had forcefully brought out some soft drinks and snacks for him.

"No I live—" she started to answer but her attention was grabbed by the door opening and a happy voice of a certain ten year old squealing.

"Mama"

For a second Zaviyar didn't know what had happened, his eyes found tht movement of a child running into Ayat's awaiting arms as she hugged tht little body close to her.

"I'm finally home" Mihrimah jumped up and down, making Ayat grin widely and nod her head at her excitement.

"Hello Mr Qureshi" Nuha greeted brining him and the mother and daughter duo out of their own worlds.

"Uh... Hello Ms Nuha" he greeted back with his lips pursed tightly. His eyes found Ayat again who was already Looking at him.

"Who's he?" The little girl whispered in her mother's ear and Ayat glanced between the two bodies that stared at each other confused.

"Mihrimah this is my boss Zaviyar and Zaviyar this is Mihrimah. The one I was expecting" she explained while introducing them and Zaviyar nodded taking the small awaiting hand in his for a shake.

"Hi I'm Mihrimah" the girl grinned and he gave her a smile, his heart was still lurching in his throat but his self control fought against all odds of displaying his confusion on his face.

"I'm Zaviyar. You know I'm her boss but I don't know who you are to her." He asked tilting his head a little to the side. He prayed for it all to be a misunderstanding and this girl to be her niece or something but his expectations didn't live long when the girl grinned again.

"I'm her Mah." She replied tilting her head, he looked between the girl and Ayat who was gesturing Nuha to take Mihrimah away but the girl wasn't in the mood of leaving yet.

"I'm her daughter silly" Mihrimah laughed seeing the frown between his brows and slapped her forehead lightly.

Zaviyar forced a smile and nodded before she left and his expression turned cold.

"She's your—"

"My daughter? Yes" Ayat replied meeting his gaze confidently.

"You're married?" He couldn't stop himself as the question slipped out of his mouth. Her eyes turned cold and her posture straightened.

"Why is that needed to be asked?" She snapped and he raised his brow at her.

"You never mentioned you were" he replied back in a tone similar to hers.

"I haven't mentioned it even now" she raised her eyebrows.

"You've adopted her?" He asked and she took in a deep breath.

"Mr Qureshi. I would appreciate if you would stop making assumptions about me and my daughter. She's my blood, not adopted" she replied in a clipped tone.

"Who's her father?"

"That's none of your business" she snapped and his jaw locked. He glared at her and ran a hand through his hair before getting up from his place rather harshly.

"I think you should take your leave now" she said crossing her arms over her chest.

He left without saying another word and she sank back in her place feeling herself rot in regret of letting someone new know about her daughter. She didn't have a problem with letting people know, she wasn't scared to show off her little girl but everytime someone found out about her child they would always leave with looks of disgust thrown her way.

After all she had Mihrimah in the darkness of blind love and trust. At sixteen she didn't know her trust on her lover would make her go through all this.

She didn't know that what he promised to be the best part of their relationship would somehow, somewhere in her life would become a hurdle that people would be disgusted to cross.

Having a child at sixteen and out of wedlock was still to this day brought her looks of disgust and abhorrence.

All those times of when he convinced her that he loved her and that what they were doing wasn't wrong came rushing back to her like always.

All she did was trust his word not knowing that what he promised to be their own secret would be all over the school groups the very next day. What he promised to keep hidden was shared with everyone in school. What she didn't know was that a month later she'd come across the news of her having a child and him not wanting it.

The man could pay for a plan B but not own upto his mistakes and take care of the two. The least he could've done was to stay by her side. Apologize, but life didn't go as olan did it ever.

"Ayat" she jumped at the feel of a hand on her shoulder. Her eyes met a pair of onyx black ones and she sighed in relief.

"It's okay. She's your daughter." Nuha consoled knowing how it was always for her friend to hyperventilate even on small things.

"He's also going to judge me like everyone else." She said panting hard for air.

"So let him. It's not your fault"

"It somewhere is"

"Stop blaming yourself"

"I'm the one who went whoring around, I'm the one to be blamed"

"You were a child. You didn't know there was a possibility of him fleeing away. You're only mistake was you trusted the wrong person"

"Then why am I one being judged still? I've repented. I've learned my lesson. Why do—" her voice cracked as her chest felt heavy and hands trembled covering her face "why... Why do I still feel this heavy brick on her heart that's not going away. Sometimes..."

"Oh God not today" she breathed in deeply.

"Just let it all out. That's what's the best for you right now"

"I'm such a burden" she cried shoving her head in her hands.

"No you're not."

"Yes I am. All I ever do is cry and pass out from anxiety. I'm of no use and I'm literally holding your life back. I'm sorry" she cried.

"Well you are?" Nuha rolled her eyes. Ayat looked up from the ground with teary eyes.

"I know right. I'm sor—" she didn't get to complete the sentence as a loud slap echoed in the room knocking Ayat off the chair.

"Bitch I don't give a damn about your past. I've lived through it with you. If you were to be a burden on my life I would've walked right out when I had the chance. I wouldn't have cried infront of mom to stop those people from adopting my ass. You're my only family so it would better if you shut the hell up and let me have some time with my daughter that's acres because you're crying like someone just died"

Nuha flipped her hair back after breathing. She was yelling it all out in one breath and her voice squeaked at the end.

"Dumb ass" she exhaled looking at the girl who stood worriedly in the corner.

"Is she okay?" Mihrimah asked and Nuha rolled her eyes.

"No. I'm enrolling your mom in a mental hospital. She needs some brain cells" Nuha sassed helping a weeping Ayat up.

"Mama" Mihrimah whispered standing infront of her mother with worry in her eyes.

"Yeah?" Ayat smiled through her quivering lips and took in a deep breath wiping her tears away.

"Are you not happy with me being here?" She asked with an innocent frown on her face and Ayat died a thousand deaths then and there.

"No." She spoke alittle too quickly and too loudly holding her daughter's shoulders.

"No baby. I'm over the moon to have you here" she explained feeling her insecurities come flushing back.

"Then why are you crying?" She asked wiping her mother's rosy cheeks.

"Didn't you see your aunty Nuha just slapped me" Ayat said glaring at the woman who stood beside her rolling her eyes.

"Yeah whatever" Nuha shrugged.

"Aunty Nuha, apologize" Mihrimah said.

"No thank you I'm fine like this" she said but Mihrimah wasn't having it. She climbed on the sofa and stood infront of her aunt, her chest puffed out and fists on her hips.

"You hit my mama. Apologize to her. You made her cry" she said narrowing her eyes at her.

"I didn't. You're mama was just too happy to see you here. She's just messing with you" Nuha explained and Mihrimah turned towards her mother.

Ayat nodded with a now stable smile on her lips and Mihrimah looked in between them.

"I swear I'm very happy to finally be able to keep you with me. It's just that I took a few medicines and they made me a little emotional so I got emotional when I thought of all those times we could spend together and finally live happily ever after" Ayat whispered cupping her child's face.

Adoration, happiness, calm and peace was what she felt as she gazed into a similar pair of honey eyes. Mihrimah nodded and hugged her mother.

She felt bad to see her mother cry like that, she was always confused as why her mother was always so easily triggered by everything. She would always notice how her mama would panic over small things but sh also knew her Mama was strong when she had to be. Panic was just for behind door to be shared with aunty Nuha but she had most times creep up behind them.

He.

She always heard about this he but she never knew who it was. She knew this person had something to do with her Mama's bad confidence. And Mihrimah swore she will give him an earful of he was a bully who was troubling her innocent mama.

"I'm so happy my princess is finally here. I can cuddle with her, we can okay dress up and so much more" Ayat gushed as she hugged her baby girl tightly and peppered kisses over her face making the girl giggle.

"Mama stop" she squealed as Ayat tickled her.

"Aww. My Mah" she exhaled snuggling her hair while Nuha freshened up.

"Zavi uncle was pretty" Mihrimah commented nodding her head and Ayat narrowed her eyes amused at the nickname.

"Zavi uncle?" She questioned and Mihrimah nodded looking up at her mother from where she laid on top of her nestled in her bust.

"He's cute" she commented and Ayat gasped.

"Mihrimah" Ayat gasped playfully.

"What?" She laughed innocently.

"Do you like him?" She asked and Ayat felt her jaw hitting the ground.

"He's my boss"

"He's handsome too"

"You're too young to be talking about this"

"But you said I can talk to you about anything"

"Well you can but why would I like my boss?"

"For the money" Mihrimah rubbed her fingers together and Ayat knew where this was coming from.

"Nuha" she gritted and pulled Mihrimah to sit up on her lap.

"Mah. This isn't a very nice thing to say okay. I get it aunty Nuha says that but don't say it infront of anyone else" Ayat explained pushing back a strand of her daughter's waist length hair.

"Okay..." She drawled nodding her head "but how did you know aunty Nuha said that?"

"I just know" Ayat replied smiling at her girl and Mihrimah nodded before lowering herself to her mother's chest again listening to her heartbeat.

Slumber soon took over the little girl as exhaustion of the day drained her of energy.

"I love you" she mumbled in her chest making Ayat nod and kiss the top of her head.

"I love you more, Mah"

Nuha came back after a long relaxing shower and smiled at the duo. What was lost in her thoughts caressing her daughter's hair when she was startled by the sudden pull at Mihrimah's body.

"I'll put her to bed" Nuha smiled taking Mihrimah from Ayat and Ayat nodded.

"You need to help yourself Ayat" Nuha started as they both settled in their balcony with coffee in hand.

"I'm trying"

"Before it wasn't a problem but now Mihrimah is living with us. Ayat I understand you inner turmoil and I'm here whenever you feel like you want to vent out but not infront of Mah." Nuha whispered rubbing Ayat's back.

"She's a child. A child whoa been away from her mother's mostly her whole life. Her first thought after seeing you cry was that you're not happy with her. Do you know what that means?" Nuha stopped as Ayat dropped her head in shame.

"If you're insecure about being a bad mother and a weak parent then Ayat, Mah is insecure about not being the best daughter and for hell's sake she's only ten. She doesn't need this" Nuha tried explaining and Ayat nodded.

"I'm trying. I'm trying my best to be as much of a positive parent as I can be but sometimes..." Her voice cracked.

"Sometimes I fear what if I'm only doing this to make up for my past mistakes. What if... What if I'm only ruining her life by keeping her with me. An emotionally unstable mother who can't get over her past. What if i end up like one of those toxic parents who's children suffer in silence."

"What if I.... What if one day I don't want to keep fighting anymore? I love her. I'm alive for her. Her and you are the only reasons why I want to wake up every morning, and I feel so bad throwing my baggage on your shoulders. I'm sorry if I'm upsetting you by doing this melodrama everyday. I'm sorry Nuha. Just tell when and I'll stop" she croaked leaning away from Nuha feeling as though she was just being a burden over her shoulders.

"Come here you" Nuha said pulling her to herself.

"You're the mom I never had Ayat. You've always held me together. I'm mentally stable because you never showed me the bad side of the world. After mom you and Mah are my only family. You don't even realize if but I'm nothing without you. Janam, you're the love of my life right now and to hell with you being a burden. What are soulmates for. They build you up when you're falling apart."

She chuckled hugging Ayat close. And Ayat joined in too.

"You're strong headed Ayat. It's just a phase and you'll pass through it. You'll fight your way out and see that you're better than any of these tears. You're a human and humans are allowed to break, fall apart, have a moment. It's all natural and I don't understand this, then there's not a bigger idiot that I've seen in my entire life, after you obviously. You doubt my love for you. I hate you" she said pushing Ayat away making the woman laugh and she soon joined in. With one last hug they sighed in sync.

"Get your ass out of bed and make my daughter her favourite dinner" Ayat ordered.

"Aren't you a little too charged after this" Nuha narrowed her eyes.

"I got the energy hug from the best and now I'm feeling like I'm brand new" Ayat stretched and Nuha shook her head with a smile on her face.

Her friend was indeed stronger than her anxiety let her on. 

For years Ayat was her support system not asking for much, just for a hug and silence whenever she had a meltdown, which happened more often in places with huge crowds and at times of introductions. Over sharing or sharing at all were her enemies.

Even now sharing a part of her life with someone new caused her breakdown. While she was confident and hold about owning the people she loved, she also took days after the meeting to recover fully from the face that now this particular information wasn't just between her or Nuha.

Overthinking was a very big female dog in her case.

Making lasagna with garlic bread she set the table and called the mother and daughter duo.

"Dinner's ready—" she sang but stopped and awed at the sight of two caramel heads sleeping together.

She contemplated whether to wake then up or let them and decided she'd let them bask in their warmth. Kissing the head of them two she headed to have dinner herself. She took in a deep breath and pondered over at what Ayat was going through.

"If only you didn't care too much about what people thought about you Ayat" she sighed eating her dinner alone.

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"Alright I'm off to work. Take care Mah" Ayat said kissing her baby's bead lovingly as they parted ways on the school front yard.

"Bye" Mihrimah said excitedly as she made her way to her car.

She watched her walk inside with her friend tangled under her arm and she made her way to her office. Several days have been passed and now she was going back to work feeling much confident and stable.

With fast strides she walked up to the receptionist, greeting her she headed over to her desk with a smile on her face which soon wiped away as she found her desk already occupied.

"Hey" she said moving closer to her work space that looked nothing like how she had organized it.

"Hi" Brianna stood up smiling.

"What? I mean—" Ayat said gesturing towards the laptop and files.

"Ohh I'm Mr Qureshi's—"

"Brianna let's go. I hope you have the files ready—" Zaviyar stopped seeing the woman in a white blouse and jeans. Her hair curled from the front and pulled up in a ponytail at the back.

"What's going on?" She asked gesturing towards the girl. For a minute Zaviyar gazed at her but then looked away.

"Ms Ayat you can go back to your previous designation. Ms Stewart here has been hired in you place" ..........

Assalamualikum guys how are you all?

So here an update.

Here it is. What do you think?

hope you like it.

Comment and tell me how it is.

Enjoy.

Allah Hafiz.

Love
Hafsa_tahir