Tazi

The ship was creaking as the wind buffeted it. I rolled over in my hammock and stared at the wall. I hadn't been planning to still be out on Christmas Eve, but some part of me haven't been able to turn around and head back home.

Maybe Greenhaven isn't home anymore. That awful little voice in my head muttered. Not since they left. Not since she—

I sat up, furious at the mere existence of the thought.

"Greenhaven still is home." I said into the silence of the cabin. It was empty, as was the rest of the ship. No one wanted to travel on Christmas Eve.

No one except me.

I shook my head and got up, walking out of the cabin and up to the deck. It was cold in the wind, a chill biting my ears and whipping my hair into my eyes.

"Hey, kid," one of the shiphands greeted as I walked by in the direction of the railing. They waved a scroll in the air. "Another letter came for ya."

I veered off my course and beelined toward them, accepting the scroll. I nodded my thanks and returned to my original course.

I leaned on the railing, releasing Ian into the icy water below, as I opened the scroll. It was brief, Christmas greetings from Zay and Sasha.

I sighed and tucked it away. I'd pack it up with the other ones I'd gotten. They'd long since disappeared to the bottom of my bag.

The thought of digging them out made my throat close.

"Not a fan of Christmas greetings, huh?" Another sailor asked from where she was fixing some ropes.

I looked over. "What?"

"Oh, y'know, just the way you're glaring at that letter." She chuckled, tying a final knot before walking over.

"Right." I felt my face flush. "Yeah, I just... I don't know."

She laughed brightly. "Ah, family. They're the worst and the best of us, huh?"

I looked at Ian in the waves below. "They're not exactly family." Not anymore.

She shrugged, wind whipping her short hair around. "Don't gotta be blood to be family. Just gotta be loyal."

I laughed bitterly. "Then they're definitely not family."

"Yikes, big falling out?" She patted my shoulder. "Don't worry, kid. You're young. It ain't permanent."

"What do you—" I turned, but she'd already walked away. I stared after her. It's not permanent? What does that mean?

I crossed my arms and leaned back onto the railing. Maybe I was thinking it through too much. I watched Ian for a moment, his shape rippling silently below the surf.

There was a thin fog around the ship, the air cold and wet. I could feel the condensation settling into my hair.

A shadowy mass— land— was visible, growing larger as we approached. I sighed and pulled Ian back to passive state. I hadn't been back to Greenhaven in nearly a year, and yet here it was, in all its glory. And it was approaching way too quickly for my liking.

"Home, here we come." I muttered. At least no one but my mother was here. And Tyler. And a bunch of Greencloaks who I may or may not have snapped at the last time I saw them.

It took another hour or two before we finally docked. I adjusted the strap of my bag and walked down the gangplank. The other sailors followed, loud and excited as they were greeted by the dock workers.

No one greeted me.

I walked through the snow-laden gardens and into the hall, which was like walking into a heater.

My room was the same as I'd left it, bare and cold. I dropped my bag on my bed and sat down. The scroll in my pocket crumpled, startling me. I pulled it out and stared at it. I unrolled it again and reread it.

Merry Christmas Tazi!
-Zay and Sasha

The impersonality of the letter hit me again. I crumpled it up and tossed it across the room. It hit the wall and rolled into a corner.

I stood up and left the room, pretending it didn't make me as angry as it did.

I hurried down the stairs. I got a few nods of recognition as I passed, but that was it. The kitchen smelled like it always had when I entered, of fresh bread and smoked meats.

"Tazi!" My mother seemed to have been waiting for my appearance, for she bustled over almost immediately. "You made it."

I shrugged. "It's Christmas. I promised I'd be home." The word left a sour taste on my tongue.

She enveloped me in a hug that smelled like flour and felt like nostalgia. "Well, now that you're here, we could really use your help."

I resisted a smile. "Wow, putting me to work already? I've barely been back an hour."

My mother ruffled my hair and squeezed me again. "Don't complain, now." She pointed across the room. "Go help Colin."

"Okay, okay." I walked over.

Colin offered his signature sharp grin and bumped my shoulder as I fell into step beside him.

Homesickness surged in me then, which was stupid because I am home. But it wasn't the same, not without the others. And I couldn't stop thinking about that crumpled letter in the corner, regretting not sending any of my own.

so tragic but uh enjoy
tazi deserves better but he's also kinda horrible so yeah do with that what you will.
sorry it's late again!! i can't believe it's literally christmas eve wtf
happy holidays! xxx

edit: 24/12/22
crying fr
Tazi ur such a bad person
anyway!!! hope you enjoyed!!
see yall tmr!!