Dear diary,

My hyungs convinced me to have a night out yesterday. I agreed after some deliberation, considering it was Friday after all. If it wasn't for them, I probably wouldn't leave the house to go anywhere except work and the supermarket.

I noticed a really cute Rilakkuma plushie when we passed the storefronts opposite the main cinema in town. I bought it on impulse, and was told by Seokjin hyung that no matter how old I got I would still be a young 'un. Yoongi and Namjoon hyung just stared.

"Who's it for?" Namjoon asked suspiciously.

"Um, what do you mean? It's for me."

"Jeongguk...you hate Rilakkuma," clarified Yoongi.

"W-what? No I don't."

"We're positive, you've told us yourself."

"Yeah, remember the time you accidentally-on-purpose spilled bleach on Namjoon's Rilakkuma socks?" Taehyung hyung announced, obviously not having forgotten yet. He tried to stifle a laugh as Namjoon narrowed his eyes at us. In my defense though, they were really cringey and couldn't be worn with suit pants, as he'd planned to. As his friend I couldn't let him embarrass himself in public like that.

"..."

"LET MY POOR BABY LIVE. HE CAN BUY RILAKKUMA, WEED OR ANYTHING ELSE HE WANTS, IT'S HIS CHOICE," Jimin hyung broke into the conversation, thankfully saving me.

"Jimin, he can't buy weed," chimed in Hoseok hyung.

"Why not? I'm sure there are many drug dealers around here late at night."

"Yeah, but take a good look at him. No self-respecting drug dealer would willingly sell to a kid like him, lookin' fresh outta' primary school. Jeongguk looks like the only green stuff he should be messing with is a Mike Wazowski and Shrek cross-over."

"Wait - weed is green?"

These guys, I tell you.

Stupefied,
Jeongguk.

[A/N: DOES MIKE WAZOWSKI BLINK OR WINK?]