Disclaimer: SOME of the dialogue in this chapter, all characters (but Grace and Philip), the main story line and settings belong to the magnificent Cassie Clare. Grace, Philip and my own story plot belong to me. The Infernal Devices do not belong to me.

Hi guys, just so you know this: -*-*-*-*- means new characters p.o.v. ;););) And this is a early Christmas prezzie for you, hope you all have a merry Christmas (if you celebrate it, of course).

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'When love's a battle
And life's a war
When I just can't go on fighting anymore.'

- Army of Angels, The Script
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-*-*-*- Jem -*-*-*-

Jem sat on the edge of his bed, stroking Grace's thick dark hair gently. He had been like this since Will had brought her in from Miss Gray's room across the hall. He didn't know what had happened but he knew it was certainly something.

Her face, for the moment, was peaceful but Jem knew that it could change any minute. It was times like these that he wondered what Grace would have been like if Yanluo had left her alone. When they were young, he remembered the sweet girl Grace was. Their mother would often have to drag her away when she stopped in the street to talk to a beggar, or sat by a small homeless child, offering her own shawl to keep the poor thing warm.

She was still like that, of course but at the same time...not. Her kindness was more quiet. She had become more isolated and remote. Worst of all, it was getting harder and harder for Jem to reach her.

Grace's breathing suddenly quickened and she tossed and turned against the pillow, her hair tangling. Her chest was moving up and down so rapidly that he thought she was going to explode. Jem took hold of her wrist and jerked back, surprised about how hot she was. Now Grace was writhing off the bed, screaming out his name and for him to help her.

"Grace, Gracey," Jem said, panicking. He hated seeing her like this. "It's only a nightmare. It's not real. Please Grace. I'm here, Gracey. I'm right here." He tried to shake her awake but it was no use. It  had got hold of her. "Come on, Grace," Jem said, his voice trembling. "Fight back! You can do it. Fight it!"

Grace sat bolt right up, her eyes wide and pupils unfocussed and more terrifying, bright red. As soon as she saw Jem she screamed, tumbling off the bed and scrambling into the corner, curling up her knees to her chest. Jem approached her carefully, his hands out. This had happened before so he had to be careful. Last time she had almost strangled him. If Will hadn't been there...Jem didn't want to think about what could have happened.

"Grace?" He said softly. "Gracey, it's me." Her eyes was wide with fear. They glowed like the embers of a fire, a sign that it  was on the surface of her mind. If he mistook that, he wouldn't mistake the colour his necklace was turning:

Black with a wisp of red.

"Get out of my head!" she screamed. "Get out! You're not Jem! You're not my brother! Please just leave me alone!"

"Gracey, it is me," Jem said again. "Your brother. You fought it off. You're safe with me." He was on his knees now, crouching in front of her. She flinched away. "Grace," he whispered, slowly reaching out to take her hand. "I'm not going to hurt you. It's me."

"Jem?" Her voice was shaking.

"Yeah it's me," he said gently. "You need to calm down and go back to hazel. Can you do that for me?"

"Oh God," she said, burying herself into his chest. "I'm so sorry," she sobbed. "I did it again. I'm so sorry, Jem. I didn't know it was you. It keeps tricking me... I'm so sorry."

"Shh shh," he soothed, stroking her back. "It's not your fault. It never is. But right now I need you to go hazel." Just then, the door opened and Will stepped in, looking slightly ruffled in his evening dress.

"Jem, I have two announcements to ma-" he broke off when he saw Jem on the floor holding Grace. "Is she all right?"

"I think so," Jem said. "Just calming down." Jem watched as the redness in her eyes slowly drained away as she pushed it  back down, returning to her normal self.

"It was her angel," Grace mumbled in his arms.

"What did she say?" Will asked.

"I think she said 'it was her angel'," Jem replied, slightly confused himself.

"Well that's it, she's completely insane!" Will declared.

"That's really helpful, Will," Jem muttered. He studied Grace intently while she took deep breaths to calm herself down. "You all right now?"

"I- I think so," she said. "It wasn't too bad. Nothing like night..." Jem knew what it was like for her at night. He remembered all too well the times he and Will had held her down to the bed, trashing and screaming as it  plagued and tortured her with nightmares in an attempt to break free. Jem had held her sobbing in his arms when she was almost killed by fear. It was Jem who wrapped his arms around her as she was hit with spasms and threw up everything she had in her stomach, including blood sometimes. Yes, he knew what happened to her s well as he knew of his own illness.

"What were your announcements, Will?" Grace asked breaking away from Jem and sitting on his bed. She was shaking slightly but obviously wanted to change the subject. Jem stood up and sat on the truck at the end of the bed, holding the case to his violin.

"One: Philip Blackthorn is here," Will said, leaning back on the wall lazily. Grace looked up.

"Now is not really the best time for him to be here," she muttered.

"Actually, I think now is the perfect time for him to be here," Will countered. "He wants to see you later. He did want to see you immediately but I said you were busy."

"Next announcement?" Jem asked mildly.

"Two: there is a tiny problem to do with Tessa," Will said as if he didn't have a care in the world.

"Miss Gray, you mean," Jem chided, not looking up.

"I know perfectly well what her surname is," Will said, rolling his eyes.

"What's the damn problem, Will?" Grace asked impatiently.

"She's a Downworlder." Jem froze, almost dropping his violin.

"But-" he started.

"I know, James," Will said. "But I already spoke to Charlotte. She said we're not going to tell the Clave for the moment. But Gracey will have to keep her distance."

"All right, then," Grace said quietly. She stood up to leave.

"Grace-" Will was cut off by Jem violently shaking his head at him. He sighed and let Grace go. As soon as the door shut, Jem threw himself back onto the bed and let out a groan somewhere between anger and deep sorrow.

"How can the Clave be so cruel to her?" He said to no one in particular.

"'The law is harsh, but it is the law,'" Will murmured. "Someday, she might find some peace." Jem didn't say anything. "I'm off to dinner," Will said to fill the silence. "And you are going to get some rest. I shall be back later on tonight."

"Will," Jem said before he left. "Watch out for her tonight. We both know she won't obey the Clave. Not this time. It's all becoming too much for her to stand. Please, just promise me." Will only nodded before leaving, closing the door quietly behind him.

-*-*-*-*-Grace -*-*-*-*-
Grace hurried down the corridor, almost running to get away from Jem's room. She couldn't believe she did it again. That was the third time this month that she'd woken up from nightmares and had not recognised her own brother. It  kept on messing with her head, making her see things that weren't there. It was exhausting but if she gave in to it, everyone Grace loved would die and more. What troubled her more was that it was Miss Gray's angel necklace that set her off. It had to be an angel; that was just cruelly ironic.

"Grace?" Philip Blackthorn said from the drawing room door. "I was just about to go looking for you." Grace took a moment to study him. When I first met him, the first thing she was surprised at was how young he was. Suddenly Grace was thrown into a flashback, the memories swirling on the surface of her mind.

-*-*-*-*- Charlotte -*-*-*-*-
"Grace," Charlotte said quietly, standing in the doorway of the training room. "Philip Blackthorn is here." Grace sat by the fire, curled up and holding her knees. She was visibly shaking, despite the warmth, but Charlotte couldn't blame her. Jem had an attack today; the first real bad one since they had been here. Will had literally carried Jem home from their demon hunt and was now sitting with him in his room. It had effected Grace a lot more than Charlotte expected which worried her.

Charlotte walked over to her and crouched by her side. "He's here to help you, Grace," she said. "You've just got to try him."

"There is something wrong with me, Charlotte," the little girl whispered. "I'm a disgrace to the Shadowhunters. I hear them say it themselves. I am weak and helpless an- and just a disgrace. No one should help me. It's my fault Jem-" She stopped herself when she realised what she was saying. Grace hated to talk about Shanghai. Charlotte felt her heart burst for this sweet but vulnerable little girl. So much bad had happened to her but her father always said: the worst things often happened to the people who deserved them the least.

"There is nothing wrong with you at all, Grace Carstairs," a voice from the door said. Charlotte looked up to see the messy black hair and intelligent green eyes of Philip Blackthorn. He stood with his back straight and hands behind his back, looking very serious and professional indeed.

Grace's eyes widened. "You- you're so young," she blurted out. "Why has the Clave sent you and not an adult?" It was true that Philip was only fourteen but he had the manner of a thirty year old. Charlotte was told that he had plenty of experience dealing with people effected by demons for one so young but it almost made her feel sad that he was shoved into this responsibility. It wasn't his fault he had a natural talent for this and now, the Clave had given him this official job, whether he wanted it or not.

"I'm probably not what you expected," Philip said with a gentle smile, "But neither are you. Maybe that will be better for the both of us."

"You'll soon find out that I'm not what I looked like," Grace whispered, looking into the fire. Philip thought for a moment then walked straight towards Grace, not hesitating at all. Charlotte was about to say to him to be careful; one thing she had learnt about Grace was that you shouldn't be so forward with her. It might make her a little jumpy.

"I think you are an innocent and tortured person who didn't deserve an ounce of what happened to you," he said, looking straight into Grace's beautiful hazel eyes. "I'm going to help you realise that. You just need to trust me, can you do that?" He held out his gloved hand for Grace to take. She hesitated.

"You promise you won't judge me for things that I can't control," she said, her voice shaking but growing in strength and character.

"I promise," Philip said.

"And you promise to not make me do something I don't want to do?" Charlotte had to stop herself from taking in a sharp intake of breath.

"I swear on the Angel I won't," Philip replied. Grace took a deep breath and took Philip's hand, letting him lead her out of the training room.

-*-*-*-*- Grace -*-*-*-*-
"Sorry, Philip," Grace said, shaking her head to clear herself. "I'm just a little distracted at the moment."

"Charlotte has said to me that she suspects you had an attack today," Philip said sternly. "You said to me at our last meeting that you were getting better at controlling it."

"I was- I mean I am getting better," Grace said. "It was just a little slip. Nothing to worry about." Philip thought intently for a moment.

"Are you still drawing?" He asked.

"Yes," Grace said. "I've also started to write music as well. Both equally help me get control of my emotions."

"I just admit I was a little surprised when you first said you were drawing," Philip chuckled. "Considering your family's musical talent but I see you have decided to exploit that as well now." He pulled out a notebook from inside his jacket and wrote something down. Grace sighed and turned.

"I'll see you at dinner, Philip," she said.

"Wait, Grace, you know the law," he said, reaching to catch her arm. "You cannot be in contact with a Downworlder. Part of my charge here is to make sure you don't. I'm already disobeying them by not telling them that Miss Gray is here."

"Wasn't it you who told me that a bad law is no law?" Grace said, looking over her shoulder as she walked down the corridor.

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