Disclaimer: SOME of the dialogue in this chapter, all characters (but Grace and Philip), the main story line and settings belong to the amazing Cassandra Clare. Grace, Philip and my own story plot belong to me. The Infernal Devices do not belong to me.

A/N: Anthony Joshua Brand for Will? What do we think?

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'Loving can hurt, loving can hurt sometimes
But it's the only thing that I know
When it gets hard, you know it can get hard sometimes
It is the only thing that makes us feel alive.'

- Photograph, Ed Sheeran

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-*-*-*-*- Grace -*-*-*-*-

Will cried out again as Brother Enoch drew out another shard of metal. "Will, you need to take another pain killing rune," Grace said, moving aside so Jem could draw yet another one onto his skin. "Stop trying to be brave."

They were in the infirmary back at the Institute. Charlotte had called for Brother Enoch as soon as they arrived, Henry, Grace and Cyril carrying Will and Jem still with Tessa in his arms. The Silent Brother had arrived swiftly enough, bandaging Tessa's head before moving onto Will. Tessa was lying a couple of beds away, sleeping soundly but every so often, Jem would flit his worried eyes towards her.

"I'm not trying to be bloody brave," Will said through gritted teeth. "I just want to get this over and-ahh!" Brother Enoch had dug the tweezers into Will's back again, pulling out a smaller shard of metal dripping with blood.

"Jesus Christ, a little warning next time!"

"Personally, I think you deserved that for swearing in front of a Silent Brother," Jem tried to joke but his face was pale and white. He looked like he was going to throw up any second. He met Grace's gaze but waved away her concern.

"There is no bloody law about swearing in front of a bloody Silent Brother," Will growled. "So stop making up bloody rules just to stop me from bloody swearing!" He fisted the sheets under his fingers as Brother Enoch dug the tweezers in again, whimpering slightly and his back arching off the table. Every muscle in his body was tight and taunt. Grace snatched at Jem's hand from under the table and he squeezed it gratefully.

"How many more?" Will groaned. Blood was dripping down his sides, splattering the pure white sheets. "Please tell me that's it." Jem slid his free hand into Will's.

"Not many more now," he said. "Here, squeeze my fingers. It will help with the pain." Despite everything, Will relaxed slightly at his parabatai's touch and grabbed Grace's hand too.

"Don't leave," he ground out. Grace looked to Jem then at all their joined hands.

"We're not going anywhere," she said. Will gulped as Brother Enoch brought down the tweezers again, burying his face into the pillows and crushing both of Jem's and Grace's hands. Grace was pretty sure that Will broke their fingers by the time Brother Enoch finished. He lay on the bed, almost panting and covered in a sheen of sweat as she and Jem drew iratzes onto Will's back then wrapped him in bandages. He was asleep within seconds from pure exhaustion.

"The wounds will take a couple of days to properly heal," Brother Enoch told them. "Summon me if there are any complications."  And with that, he was gone.

"How about you go and get some rest," Grace said to Jem. "You look tired."

"Are you sure?" He asked. He looked at Will's softly sleeping figure then to Tessa who was flushed red and murmuring from nightmares.

"Go on, I'll keep an eye on them," she said. He smiled a little then turned to leave. "And Jem," she called. He faced her from the door.

"Yeah?" Grace hesitated.

"Are-are you all right?"

"I am fine," Jem said, a little confused. Grace nodded and turned back to Will. But Jem didn't leave. "Gracey, what is it?" he asked. "Please, tell me." She closed her eyes and exhaled deeply.

"Will told me everything that happened while I was asleep," she said. "Including some of the things you did." She heard him sigh and come over to her, placing his hands on her shoulders. He was slightly taller than her so she had to look up to meet his eyes.

"I am so sorry, Grace," he said. "I know that what I did was wrong, crazy even. The Clave were talking about imprisoning you for life, maybe even killing you. And then all I could think about was how I didn't do enough to protect you, how everything was my fault."

"Jem..." Grace whispered but the words were unsaid between them.

We both know who's fault it really is.

Jem  walked to Will's bedside, watching some of the cuts and gashes on his face and arms knit themselves back together as the iratze's took hold. "I was caught up in revenge, both to save you and be the hero that was to defeat Mortmain," he said. "But I became a monster, a stranger to everyone who knew me. I knew what was happening to me but I ignored it, convincing myself that it was all Mortmain. Will tried to stop me but I pushed him away like the fool I was."

"You might want to explain this to Will when he wakes," Grace said from behind him. "I wasn't there at the time, but he was. He watched you rip yourself apart, Jem. He's your parabatai, it effected him more than you know."

"It wasn't his fault," Jem said quickly. "It was mine, all my fault. I put everyone in danger for my own selfish desires. That's something that I'll never live down, never forgive myself for."

"And the opium den?" Grace asked. "Will told me about that. He was distraught, thinking that you didn't trust him enough after that to take him with you." Jem closed his eyes and took a deep breath.

"We all cope with things in different ways," he said. "I forgave Will almost straight away...after I punched him but that's beside the point. Seeing his sister just tipped him over the edge. I was over that edge a long time beforehand." He walked towards the door.

"I forgive you, Jem," Grace said. He paused. "And you should forgive yourself too."

"I wish I could," he sighed and left the infirmary.

***

Grace slept a few hours in the infirmary in one of the armchairs. When she awoke, she was surprised that she didn't have any nightmares and even more surprised to see Will, up and dressed, sitting beside a still sleeping Tessa.

"Will?" she asked. "What are you doing up? You should be resting."

"She was awake," he said softly and distractedly. "I was talking to her. But she thought it was all a dream...she didn't think it was real."

"She hit her head pretty hard," Grace said, standing up and walking towards Will. "She's probably just having a little trouble sorting out fact from fiction. It's nothing to worry about."

"I worry though," Will said quietly. "Grace, I cannot even begin to express how much I love her, how much I want to tell her I love her. But I can't without killing her. But not telling her kills me. It's an endless circle that always ends in death." Grace put a hand lightly on his shoulder, momentarily brushing away the thought of Jem loving Tessa as well.

"We'll sort it out," she said. "We'll find a way, anyway. We'll pay however much is needed, do whatever is needed to do. I promise you, Will, we will free you from this."

"That's the thing," he said. "I've received a message from Magnus. It's just an address but..."

"You think he's found something," Grace said, straightening up. "Don't you?"

"Can you go with me?" he asked, finally looking at her. His blue eyes were bright even in the grey early morning light.

"Of course I will," she said. "We should go straight away, if you are all right to, that is." He nodded and they both were out of the Institute a few minutes later. It was still dark but the sun was rising slowly from the east, sending a burst of colours shooting through the sky. Will lead the way to the address in silence, his hands shoved deep into the pockets of his overcoat. He was nervous, Grace thought.

They arrived in front of a door and Will knocked on it three times. A few seconds later, it flew open and none other than Woolsey Scott stood in its threshold. "Ah," he said, glancing over Will and settling his gaze on Grace. "So this must be the delightful Miss Carstairs. Charmed to meet you, and so pleased to see you awake and well, of course."

"Thank you, Mr Scott," Grace said, inclining her head.

"I consider this a privilege," Scott continued. "It isn't often that a Downworlder gets to make your acquaintance."

"Woolsey, enough," a deep voice said. Magnus appeared in the doorway behind  Scott, looking grave and tired. "Leave them be." Wolsey sighed.

"As you wish," he said. He then  gave Magnus an odd look. "You may use my brother's bedroom upstairs for your business." Magnus rolled his eyes and opened the door a little wider to allow Grace and Will inside. Will remained rigid as they walked down the dark corridors of, Grace could only assume, Woolsey's house.  

"I didn't expect you to be coming so soon," Magnus said, looking back at them.

"You know what this means to me. Did you really think that I'd delay?" Will said. Magnus only nodded and ushered them into a dusty old room. With a click of his fingers, the furniture was pushed to the side of the room in a shower of blue sparks. As Magnus knelt to the floor to draw a pentagram, Grace went over to Will who stood still, his hands closed into tight fists.

"Are you ready?" she asked him. He looked at her.

"What if it is the wrong demon?" he whispered. "I don't think I can handle another failure."

"Then we'll try again," she said. "And we won't stop until you are free. That I promise you." Will only nodded as Magnus stood up again and started chanting. Grace backed away to stand next to him as Will stepped forward to face the fiery figure that emerged in the pentagram.

"Who dares to summon Marbas ?" it hissed.

"I do," Will said. "Do you remember me?"

"You. You are the brat that chased me through the grounds of the Lightwood country house. You tore out my tooth!" It growled.

"No," Will said. "Five years ago, I opened a Pyxis and you emerged. We were in my father's library. You attacked and my sister fended you off with a seraph blade. Do you remember now?"

The demon remained still and silent, its eyes unreadable. Grace glanced at Magnus then flicked her eyes back to Will, her hand sliding to the throwing dagger in her belt.

"Speak the truth, Marbas," Magnus said.

"You are Edmund Herondale's son," it laughed. "I remember the person who freed me, of course. And I cursed you. Whoever loved you will find only death and destruction. It may take moments or years but they will die of their love for you. And I shall begin with your sister. One of my favourite curses, I must say."

"It is not a laughing matter, demon," Grace growled, stepping forward. Its eyes seemed to bore into her.

"And you know much about curses, don't you, Yanluo?" It said.

"You know, Marbas," Magnus said before Grace could retaliate, pushing her back from sight. "Your story is very odd. A demon recently released from a Pyxis would be too weak to cast a curse as subtle and strong as the one you claim to have put on Will. You will speak the truth or risk the wrath of my father." The demon hissed but conceded.

"The half-cast is correct," Marbas said. "There is no curse on you, Will Herondale. Your sister died because I struck her with my stinger. The curse was false. I swear on the Baal that I am telling the truth; it would do me no good now to lie, as fun as it was."

"No!" The screamed escaped Will's lips as his knees gave out and he slumped to the floor.

"Will is right," Magnus said. "Marbas, you are a blue-skinned bastard."

"Allow me to do the honours," Grace said, drawing her dagger. She could feel the blade heating up in her palm, glowing red. She tried to ignore it and prayed that Magnus wouldn't notice either.

"Please, be my guest," Magnus said. He stepped back as Grace threw the dagger. It thudded into Marbas's heart and he screamed, burning and dying within the pentagram, folding in upon itself.

"Will," Grace said, rushing to his side and laying a hand on his shoulder. "Will, I am so sorry."

"All these years," he whispered. "The lying, the pushing people away, the suffering, the unforgivable things I said to Tessa...all a waste. All for nothing!" His hands were trembling and his whole body shaking. Grace crouched down, lifting Will's chin to make him look at her.

"Will, you have spent five years pushing everyone around you away," she said. "You feared love, and the fact that Henry, Charlotte and even Jem and I survived was because you felt we didn't love you. But you fear it so much that you missed the truth."

"What is the truth?" He whispered.

"We always loved you," Grace said. "Always." She helped Will to his feet and Magnus lead them back down the corridors to the front door. Will stumbled out into the night, leaning against the wall and taking deep breaths to calm himself.

"Make sure he doesn't do anything stupid when he gets home," Magnus said to her. Grace smiled faintly.

"As always," she said. "Thank you, Magnus...for everything." She turned to leave but Magnus caught her arm.

"You are going to have to make a choice, Grace," he said to her, a serious light in his eyes. "They can't both love the same girl. It will destroy their friendship, and you know better than anyone that they need each other desperately."

"I know," Grace said quietly. "But how can I not help them both? They've both suffered so much and deserve to be happy."

"Well, in the end, it isn't up to you, Grace," Magnus said gravely. "It's up to the three of them." And he shut the door behind him.

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Hiya peeps!

Probably just one more chapter (maybe two) and then the epilogue to go and then onto Clockwork Princess! I'm so excited to write Clockwork Princess; I've been planning it for ages so I'm super excited! There will be some parts that follow the main story line and other parts that don't.

So, let me know what you think of this one and 'Cursed' so far!

Love y'all!