Sayra followed the priestess as she led her outside. She knew the ceremony by now. She had never forgotten it. Sylas didn't allow it. He said it was a stupid tradition and that she should have been preoccupied with the nobles.

" Sayra Kamari Olloria, descendant of gods, choose."

She knew the words by heart. All the way to Ashinora, she had repeated them in her mind, knowing she couldn't get it wrong. After the wedding, when Sylas forbade her from doing the ceremony, she told them to herself before sleep. It didn't help. She still felt as if she had turned her back to her gods, as if she spat at their feet.

She thought of all the women before her who had done that. Her mother, her aunt, her grandmother, and so many others. It was a tradition in Felloria. The royalty usually chose one of the main goddess, although her mother had chosen Rivya, the goddess of crossroads. She had done it because she had been at a crossroad when she married Sayra's father.

Like Sayra herself, Levaya didn't want to marry a stranger. She did it, though. But her mother found happiness Sayra never managed to find. She wasn't going to be foolish again. She doubted happiness was something she was going to have in her life. Maybe that was the price for being a Princess, and then a Queen, for having so much when others have so little. Maybe it was the balance of life. She had a title, gold and even power. But she wouldn't have happiness. Yes, that had to be. The balance given by gods.

" I choose Itziar, the Queen of gods."

The priestess took the golden paint that had been left there before the wedding and started drawing the symbols. The paint was cold on Sayra's skin, but she waited for the priestess to be done. Two ravens had been drawn on her wrists, and a star on her chest as much as the dress allowed it. The final symbol was a constellation, the Crown, signifying who Itziar was as well as Sayra's title.

She could feel the power of the symbols and could feel the goddess' gaze on her. Sylas had always laughed at her beliefs, but Sayra knew the blood that ran in her veins. She knew who she was. She had not allowed him or anyone else to make her forget.

" From this day forth, you are under the careful eye of Itziar, Queen of Gods, Protectress of Slaves, Goddess of the Sky, till the world ends, the sky turn to fire and the seas boil, when the land is taken by darkness, and the world begins anew."

Sayra bowed her head. Although the ceremony had been made, it didn't help her, didn't ease her nerves. She feared the future and what it brought to her. Marrying Sylas, becoming Queen, she had been ready for that. But this... Being the wife of a lord whose goals were unknown to her, being a hostage to keep her brother in check. She was not ready.

As the priestess led her back to the throne room, Sayra wanted to run. What was she doing? She couldn't do it. She couldn't. Sylas was a known monster. She had been able to read him from the day she met him. Simple gestures could tell so much about a person. But this man who was now her husband? She had no idea who he was.

She wanted to go home. She wanted to be somewhere safe and never think of Ashinora again. She wanted to forget about Sylas and his hands that would always leave her bruised, about Ashinora and all their problems. But she couldn't.

I am Sayra Olloria, daughter of Emperors, descendant of gods. I am not afraid.

The words felt like a lie. She was afraid. She was terrified. Yes, Sylas had hurt her. He had locked her in his palace and hit her every time he got mad. The last five years had been a living nightmare. But she had her children. She had Tamira and Tavon. And Sylas had been a known monster. She had managed to know his moods, knowing when he was most likely to hit her.

But this Elyas Roverik... She didn't know him. She didn't know when he might last out on her. She didn't know how to handle him. She didn't know his moods or who he was. A part of her wanted to believe not all men were like Sylas. She knew that. Her brother would never do anything like her husband did. There were other nobles in Felloria who she had considered honourable. But she had once believed the same thing about Sylas before she met him.

So, how could she trust the man she had just married? He was a stranger to her, and she had been hurt too much by strangers. No. Sayra had had enough of sweet lies and false friends.

There was no way for her to back down now. There was no way to escape this marriage. She would just have to find a way to survive. She knew how to stab a man. Her brother taught her.

" Princess?"

Sayra snapped from her thoughts, raising her head towards the priestess. She remembered her name is Zarah.

Only nodding, Sayra entered the throne room. She wasn't going to run. Her children were safe. That was all that mattered. They were safe, and they would not be harmed in her brother's Court.

" You look stunning, cousin," Faris told her as soon as he saw her. " Itziar. A good choice for a princess."

" Thank you, Faris. I trust you shall tell my brother about what happened here."

Faris nodded. " The Emperor also asks you to write to him. He was very concerned when you stopped doing that."

Sylas had forbidden her to write to her brother two months after she married him. He said it could be intercepted by Ashinora's enemies. Sayra had known it to be a poor excuse.

" I hope to be able to do so."

Faris caught the meaning of her words. " Elyas is a good man."

" There were some who would have sworn the same about Sylas."

Sayra could see the sadness in her cousin's eyes. They have always been close. After her aunt, Faris' mother, died, he was raised alongside Sayra and Keris. They were more like siblings than cousins.

" Do not tell my brother that," Sayra asked him. Keris would only blame himself for sending her to Ashinora.

" Take care, cousin. I fear the war is far from over."

Sayra nodded. She, too, had heard rumours of a bastard brother of Sylas, born only twenty-eight years ago, when Sylas's father still lived. Still, some of those rumours were quite strange, saying of a marriage between Sylas' father and this brother's mother. Maybe it was only a rumour meant to strengthen the claim of this man to the throne, but Sayra had no wish for that. She had no idea how to protect her children and herself from so many threats.

" I hope to see you again." Sayra nodded, not truly wanting to say goodbye to her cousin. She wanted to go home. Although she doubted Faris could do something about it, Sayra also doesn't want to see him gone. He's always been like a brother to her. Having him near gave her a sense of safety. She wasn't safe. She knew it, but her family made her feel that way.

She threw one more look at her cousin and the rest of his guards leaving the throne room. They shall leave as soon as possible. Faris didn't want to stay in Ashinora more than necessary. Sayra couldn't blame him.

" My lady?"

She turned, facing the man she had just married minutes ago. It felt as if more time had passed.

" Yes?"

" If you don't mind, I would like to start the journey home."

" Of course."

Sayra followed him outside, throwing one more gaze at the palace that was her home. Her prison, truly. She knew she shouldn't miss it. But the capital gave her a false sense of safety. Shadowtown had only caused her pain, but it had been something she got to know. She was afraid to leave. She was afraid of the unknown. But she had no choice. It had to be done.