THE WAR GOD glanced at the others. "At ease, people." He snapped his fingers, and their weapons fell to the ground.

"This is a friendly meeting." He dug the point of his blade a little farther under Percy's chin. "Of course I'd like to take your head for a trophy, but someone wants to see you. And I never behead my enemies in front of a lady."

"What lady?" Thalia asked.

Ares looked over at her. "Well, well. I heard you were back." He lowered his sword and pushed Percy away. "Thalia, daughter of Zeus," Ares mused. "You're not hanging out with very good company."

"What's your business, Ares?" Thalia questioned, "Who's in the car?"

Ares smiled, enjoying the attention. "Oh, I doubt she wants to meet the rest of you. Particularly not them." He jutted his chin toward Zoe and Bianca. "Why don't you all go get some tacos while you wait? Only take Percy a few minutes."

"We will not leave him alone with thee, Lord Ares," Zoe said.

"Besides," Grover managed, "the taco place is closed."

Ares snapped his fingers again. The lights inside the taqueria suddenly blazed to life. The boards flew off the door and the CLOSED sign flipped to OPEN. "You were saying, goat boy?"

"Go on," Percy told his friends, "I'll handle this."

"You heard the boy," Ares said. "He's big and strong. He's got things under control."

They reluctantly headed over to the taco restaurant. Ares regarded Percy with loathing, then opened the limousine door like a chauffeur.

"Get inside, punk," he said. "And mind your manners. She's not as forgiving of rudeness as I am."

When he saw her, Percy's jaw dropped.

He forgot his name. He forgot where he was. He forgot how to speak in complete sentences.

She was wearing a red satin dress and her hair was curled in a cascade of ringlets. Her face was the most beautiful he'd ever seen: perfect makeup, dazzling eyes, a smile that would've lit up the dark side of the moon.

Thinking back on it, Percy can't tell you who she looked like.

Or even what color her hair or her eyes were. Pick the most beautiful actress you can think of. The Goddess was ten times more beautiful than that. Pick your favorite hair color, eye color, whatever. The Goddess had that.

When she smiled at me, just for a moment she looked a little like Selena. Then like this television actress Percy used to have a crush on in fifth grade. Then... well, you get the idea.

"Ah, there you are, Percy," the Goddess said. "I am Aphrodite."

Percy slipped into the seat across from her and said something like, "Um uh gah."

She smiled. "Aren't you sweet. Hold this, please."

She handed him a polished mirror the size of a dinner plate and had the boy hold it up for her. She leaned forward and dabbed at her lipstick, though Percy couldn't see anything wrong with it.

"Do you know why you're here?" she asked.

Percy wanted to respond. Why couldn't he form a complete sentence? She was only a lady. A seriously beautiful lady. With eyes like pools of spring water... Whoa.

Percy pinched his own arm, hard. "I... I don't know," he managed.

"Oh, dear," Aphrodite said. "Still in denial?"

Outside the car, Percy could hear Ares chuckling. Percy had a feeling he could hear every word we said. The idea of him being out there made him angry, and that helped clear his mind.

"I don't know what you're talking about," Percy said.

"Well then, why are you on this quest?"

"Artemis has been captured!"

Aphrodite rolled her eyes. "Oh, Artemis. Please. Talk about a hopeless case. I mean, if they were going to kidnap a Goddess, she should be breathtakingly beautiful, don't you think? I pity the poor dears who have to imprison Artemis. Bo-ring!"

"But she was chasing a monster," Percy protested. "A really, really bad monster. We have to find it!"

Aphrodite made Percy hold the mirror a little higher. She seemed to have found a microscopic problem at the corner of her eye and dabbed at her mascara. "Always some monster. But my dear Percy, that is why the others are on this quest. I'm more interested in you."

His heart pounded. He didn't want to answer, but her eyes drew an answer right out of his mouth. "Selena," Percy stated,

Aphrodite beamed. "Exactly!"

"Something's wrong with her but she won't tell me-"

"Oh, she's a stubborn girl." Aphrodite smiled, "What are you going to do about it?"

"What? I'm not gonna-"

She made a tsk-tsk sound. "Percy, I'm on your side. I'm the reason you're here, after all."

Percy stared at her. "What?"

"The poisoned T-shirt the Stoll brothers gave Phoebe," she said. "Did you think that was an accident? Sending Blackjack to find you? Helping you sneak out of the camp?"

"You did that?"

"Of course! Because really, how boring these Hunters . are! A quest for some monster, blah blah blah. Saving Artemis. Let her stay lost, I say. But a quest for true love—"

"Wait a second, I never said—"

"Oh, my dear. You don't need to say it. You do know Selena is being recruited for the Hunters, don't you?"

Percy blushed. "Of course—"

"But she wanted to stay with you! It's so romantic!" Aphrodite gushed,

"Uh..."

"Oh, put the mirror down," Aphrodite ordered. "I look fine."

Percy hadn't realized he was still holding it, but as soon as he put it down, Percy noticed his arms were sore.

"Now listen, Percy," Aphrodite said. "The Hunters are your enemies. Forget them and Artemis and the monster. That's not important. You just concentrate on finding and saving Annabeth with Selena."

"Do you know where she is?"

Aphrodite waved her hand irritably. "No, no. I leave the details to you. But it's been ages since we've had a good tragic love story."

"Whoa, first of all, I never said anything about love. And second, what's up with tragic!" Percy exclaimed,

"Oh, well, you know, with her prophecy and all-"

"Wait." Percy paused, "Which prophecy? The Great Prophecy?"

"Oh no, my dear child. She's apart of something much bigger." Aphrodite smiled, making Percy lose focus. "Love conquers all," Aphrodite promised. "Look at Helen and Paris. Did they let anything come between them?"

"Didn't they start the Trojan War and get thousands of people killed?"

"Pfft. That's not the point. Follow your heart."

"But... I don't know where it's going. My heart, I mean."

She smiled sympathetically. She really was beautiful. And not just because she had a pretty face or anything. She believed in love so much, it was impossible not to feel giddy when she talked about it.

"Not knowing is half the fun," Aphrodite said. "Exquisitely painful, isn't it? Not being sure who you love and who loves you? Oh, you kids! It's so cute I'm going to cry."

"No, no," Percy shook his head. "Don't do that."

"And don't worry," she said. "I'm not going to let this be easy and boring for you. No, I have some wonderful surprises in store. Anguish. Indecision. Oh, you just wait."

"That's really okay," Percy told her. "Don't go to any trouble."

"You're so cute. I wish all my daughters could break the heart of a boy as nice as you." Aphrodite's eyes were tearing up. "Now, you'd better go. And do be careful in my husband's territory, Percy. Don't take anything. He is awfully fussy about his trinkets and trash."

"What?" Percy asked. "You mean Hephaestus?"

But the car door opened and Ares grabbed his shoulder, pulling Percy out of the car and back into the desert night.

Percy's audience with the Goddess of love was over.

"You're lucky, punk." Ares pushed him away from the limo. "Be grateful."

"For what?"

"That we're being so nice. If it was up to me—"

"So why haven't you killed me?" Percy shot back. It was a stupid thing to say to the God of war, but being around him always made him feel angry and reckless.

Ares nodded, like he'd finally said something intelligent.

"I'd love to kill you, seriously," he said. "But see, I got a situation. Word on Olympus is that you might start the biggest war in history. I can't risk messing that up. Besides, Aphrodite thinks you're some kinda soap-opera star or something. I kill you, that makes me look bad with her. But don't worry. I haven't forgotten my promise. Some day soon, kid—real soon—you're going to raise your sword to fight, and you're going to remember the wrath of Ares."

Percy balled my fists. "Why wait? I beat you once. How's that ankle healing up?"

He grinned crookedly. "Not bad, punk. But you got nothing on the master of taunts. I'll start the fight when I'm good and ready. Until then... Get lost."

He snapped his fingers and the world did a three-sixty, spinning in a cloud of red dust.