JJ doesn't hate Kat. He really, really doesn't. It's too bad he's like, literally the last one to realize it, but at least they're getting somewhere.

He tries to convince himself that he still hates her, though. By creating fake logic. Like, when you hate someone, they're the first person you look for when some square groupers get inside the house to make sure they get killed first. That's totally why JJ's entire world is reduced to Kat right now, no other reason.

"This is suboptimal."

"You don't say, Pope!" she cries out, her voice higher in panic.

Her panic makes JJ realize that, yes, in fact, the situation is fucked and they're probably going to die. Which is why when Kat turns around, and looks at JJ, he's walking away, tweaking.

He knows violence. But he's usually prepared when he comes. If he's about to get beat up, if he's about to get killed, he always knows the signs, the way his dad's face scrunches up in anger.

The same way his face does.

"John B, I told you, man. Why does it always – "

His chest is constricting and his breathing is becoming erratic, making his vision almost blurry, to the point where he doesn't see Kat walk up to him. She grabs his shoulder, turns him towards her, and throws him up against the wall. It forces him to focus on her and forget about everything around him.

"JJ, look at me. You have to calm down."

JJ blinks as he looks into her dark eyes, counting the stars in them helping his breathing. He has to keep his head in the game, because Kat is here, and Kat isn't getting in danger on his watch. Because he hates her, and she has to stay alive.

"Where's the gun?" she asks softly.

He gulps, brought back to reality. "Gun? I, uh, I can't–"

"Now you don't have the gun, the one time we need the gun?" exclaims Kie.

JJ doesn't know what to say, because Kie is probably panicking too, they all are, and this is his fault, he should've seen it coming, he should've been prepared...

"Don't yell, Kie. Breathe," Kat tells her, before focusing back on JJ. "The gun?"

"It was in my backpack," JJ recalls, in a stroke of luck. "And then I -- It's on the porch."

Without thinking, he frees himself from her grip and opens the door, discreetly walking towards the porch...

"No–JJ!" He can hear worry in her hushed voice. "I swear to god–"

"John Routledge!"

He catches a glimpse of one of them, and quickly runs back in the office and closes the door behind him.

"They're on the front porch, guys," he says. Kat seems seconds away from murdering him.

"Routledge! Where you at, boy?"

He catches a glimpse of anxiety in her eyes, and doesn't think much of it because have you seen the situation? Instead, he looks around for another way out. And quick, preferably, before they realize that they're in the office.

"Guys, window. Window!" presses Kie.

"Sack this place!" screams a man.

Him and Pope run over to the window. Their fingers scrap at the wood, shards getting under the skin, but it doesn't budge. JJ pushes as hard as he can, but they just can't.

"What's taking so long?" panicks Kie.

"It's painted shut, okay?" he cries out.

She walks back to them after finding a paper cutter. You life savior.

"Hey check the backroom!"

That's it. They're so gonna die now. Any minute now, if they can't get the window open, they're toast.

The window creaks as it opens.

Kie and Pope are the first to get out, JJ helping them without getting hurt. He's about to follow, but he looks back to Kat, behind him.

See, when you hate someone, you check to make sure they're following so that you're the one who gets to obliterate them, and none other. That's totally why JJ is losing his shit because of how much he's worried about her.

Because Kat is really not following. Kat is not moving. Kat looks like a ghost, an actual one.

"Kat, we have to go," John B says, frowning, wondering why she didn't move.

JJ can see tears in her eyes. "I can't."

"Kat–" John B tries, completely confused and clueless.

"I can't move, John B," she says, keeping the tears at bay, not crying. "I – I can't... Just go."

A lightbulb goes off in JJ's brain. He knows what this is. He's been through this. When he suddenly stops moving and gives into the beating, despite his mind screaming at him to run as fast as he can. Like his body is already dead, and is just waiting for his mind to follow.

Kat is actually, physically stuck, no matter what they can try.

"Yes you can. Come on sweetheart – "

"John B," she presses, choked up. "I can't. It's a panic attack. Leave you fucking moron."

She gets angry, she uses mean words to get him to walk out on her, to get him to get away from her, like she did all those years ago.

"We are not leaving you behind."

"I said leave!"

"Go John B, I've got her."

The words spill past JJ's mouth before he can think them, but he already knows he believes them.

John B is quick to realize that, of course, if someone is going to get Kat out of there, it's JJ. So, he leaves, not without one last, long, promising look.

JJ truthfully has no idea how to proceed. He wants to help, but he's not sure if he'll make it better or worse. Physical touch is definitely a risky place to start, but they don't exactly have the time to take this step by step.

So he takes Kat's hands in his. She doesn't recoil, or anything, and it doesn't seem to make her state worse. Good.

"Don't, just go," she pleads with him.

He tries a reassuring smile. "Come on KD. Squeeze my hands."

"You're being a fucking idiot, JJ, stop proving me right."

"Yeah, use that spite to do as you're told."

He can see her forced herself out of this state, he can see the way the cogs in her brain fight against her.

He feels a squeeze. "See? This is great." He jolts as the square groupers start pounding on the door. "Now, you just have to walk."

She shuts her eyes immediately. "I can't."

JJ tries to tug her hands, but she isn't responsive anymore. "Yeah you can, c'mon."

She exhales sharply. "JJ, stop being so fucking stubborn and leave."

Literally not a chance. "Not without you."

She lets out something between a sob and a laugh. "Just go! I left you, just leave, don't die with me, that's just stupid."

He clenches his jaw and swallows thickly. The words are acid against his ribcage, but he doesn't mind, because she's an idiot. She's a stubborn idiot, and he can't believe he's unable to leave her.

He tugs on her hands harder. "Yeah well we both know how fucking stupid I am, KD, and I'm not leaving."

The men begin to kick the door down. JJ jumps at the sound, and even Kat is startled, turning her head a few inches, as much as she can, to see the door beginning to shake.

She turns back to JJ, avoiding his eyes. "Don't try to be the bigger person here! I know you hate me, now go."

He blinks at her, the room feeling as though it turned deathly silent. Has he been that awful? Like, to the point that she thinks he'll leave her behind, that he'll leave her to die?

He wishes she would just look at him and see how much she's wrong. JJ spent half his teenage years convincing himself that he hated Kat Darcy. But he doesn't. He never had. He never will. He never can.

"I don't – KD I don't hate you, you fucking idiot." There's a loud thump. "Okay, well I don't want to die here, so now would be a friggin' good time to move."

There's a gunshot as the men destroy the door's lock. They can't wait around now, it's too late.

Okay, plan B.

JJ picks her up, and all but throws her out the window. "You fucking idiot!"

He drops down beside her and grabs her hand, not caring for her insult, not risking her freezing again, instead running towards the henhouse, getting inside with the other Pogues, squeezing together to fit.

When he feels something hot run down his palm, he realizes that she's cut herself on one of the window's rusty nails, and is bleeding down on their hands.

But he can't worry about it for too long, because the rooster is losing his shit, crowing without stopping.

John B notices Kat's wrist. "Kat you're bleeding."

"It's okay," she lets out trying to stop her sobs. "The rooster needs to shut up, or they're going to know something's up."

She's right. "Do something, Pope. Shut him up," presses JJ, still holding onto Kat's hand.

Pope turns to him with wide eyes. "What do you want me to do?"

"Pet it, or talk to it. I don't know," Kie panics, tears streaming down her face.

Chickens are beginning to cluck too now. They're fucked, they're so fucked, he has to do something, no matter what it is.

John B looks out through a small opening, before sitting back next to Kie. "One of them is coming."

"You do something!" Pope almost screams.

JJ lets go of Kat's hand and he catches the rooster. The clucking and crowing are getting louder – And then JJ snaps the rooster's neck.

Silence. Silence fills the henhouse, abruptly, and over the wild roaring of his heart, JJ can hear his dad's voice in his head, playing again and again as he holds the rooster's lifeless body. JJ loves the rooster.

You ruin everything you touch.

He lets it go, unshed tears brimming in his eyes, and looks over at Kat in disbelief, almost afraid of himself. She lets out a small sob. It almost makes him want to cry. Everything you touch...

He slowly sits back next to her, and takes her hand back in his, half-expecting her to snatch her hand away. You ruin everything you touch.

She doesn't. She laces their fingers together and squeezes. There's blood on their hands, but JJ exhales a sigh of relief. Maybe not everything. Maybe not what matters.

They wait, breaths heavy and some tears of fear running on their cheeks. JJ even stops breathing for a moment, Kat tightening her grip on his hand.

"Ratter! What the hell are you doin'? Let's go."

They don't move, but they can hear footsteps getting away from them. Once they start the car and drive off, everyone lets out a sigh of relief.

They all get out of the henhouse.

"We're alive," John B lets out with a chuckle of disbelief.

"But we were fucking close to being dead!" screams Kie.

"You need to destroy the compass," says Pope.

JJ is about to join in the laughter and screams, when he feels Kat sway, holding onto his hand for support. He immediately turns to her, worried.

"KD?"

She looks up to him. "Yeah, I'm gonna pass out now."

"What–" Her eyes roll over in her head, and her body gives out, as if a puppeteer cut the strings of their puppet. "Hey, hey! What the fuck?"

JJ catches Kat before she falls on the ground, making sure that she doesn't get hurt more than she already is. The others quickly rush to her, crowding her, checking if she's fine, and the only thing that JJ thinks of doing, is brushing a hair out of her face.

The only reason he ever could convince himself that he hated Kat was because he always had it in him to care.

Authors Note: GETTING CLOSE TO THE MOMENT JJ REALIZES WHAT HAPPENED TO KD BESTIES IM SHAKING IN MY BOOTS

Editor's Note: Stop screaming I beg