Okay, okay. You are probably not going to read or understand this, but I have had this mild depression and problem in this point of my life. It has gotten so bad that I have to say something. Okay, here goes:

So, in school, things have been very upsetting. Everyone in my class ignores me. I am not exaggerating. They look at me, and that's it. Imagine that: even if you are an introvert, you need at least one other person to survive. It's fact. Seven hours of none of that. Can you see it? It hurts how lonely I get. Don't get me wrong, I see all of you as my friends. It is hard to talk about my problems, because people think they get it, but in all honesty, have no idea what I am going through. Because of this, I feel like every time I fail at something, people take the opportunity to shoot me down the first chance they get. When was the last time I was rewarded for something? 

Because of this, two other things are taking a bigger purpose in life: classwork and happiness. and we both know that for me, happiness is anime. But what happens when one overpowers the other. Sometimes, glitches in the system cause me to think i have a bad grade, stress out, and find out it is okay. And trying to stay happy is causing me to neglect classwork. Do you honestly think I can be okay and non-suicidal with JUST classwork? And at this point, it is no longer just not being sad, as this shows. Its gotten to the point where the best I can be is non-suicidal. 

And on top of that... *inhale* okay. I know I have an insane friend. I know she hugs me like an idiot sometimes. But lets be honest here. I really don't want to sound offensive, and if I do, I am sorry, but HOW DOES SOMEONE INTERPRET THAT AS LES? Is THAT the only reason people avoid me? Something that people should be okay with that doesn't even apply to me?!?!?!? And I get that I can be an idiot, but some mistakes happen in the BEGINNING OF A YEAR. Do you really have to go around calling me a hoe because of that? 

Okay. I'm sorry. That was a little random. But anyways, I honestly shouldn't even be on Wattpad right now, but it has gotten to where I am okay with doing this. Someone help me. I know I am a lazy person who does not deserve the kindness of the 200+ followers I have, but  it's kind of like a torture fest for me. If you are somehow reading this within school hours, I apologize for taking up so much of your time. Today, at lunch, I can honestly say I felt empty. Yes. EMPTY. Forgive me. I do want to keep updating for you guys, but it's just hard right now.

Thank you.