^^Isaiah^^

I found wifi *happy dance* ^.^

"Sometimes, the biggest smile contains the most pain."

Chapter 9

River's POV

Alone. I felt so empty.

I missed his touch, his smile, the way he called me 'love' or 'beautiful'.

I wanted to stay in bed all day. Sleep away the days until he'd get back, so I wouldn't have to experience the day without him.

It's funny how I've known him for such a small period, yet I've grown so attached to him.

The only one who loves me.

"Good morning, cutie!" Michael pranced in, landing smack on top of me.

"Oof!"

He peeked up at me through the furs and linens with a huge smile on his face.

"Get up, cutie! There's a whole day ahead of us!"

Ugh, morning people.

"No." I pulled the furs on top of myself, curling into a ball.

I squeaked as a rush of cool air hit me. I looked up at a grinning Michael holding all the blankets above me.

"Evil." I whimpered, curling into myself. Hoping to maybe generate some body heat.

"Aww, so cute!" Michael cooed, pulling me into his lap.

"Poophead," I mumbled.

Michael gasped dramatically, "Oh, you did not."

Uh oh, why am I get a bad feeling?

I squeaked as Michael jumped up, still holding me in his arms, and made a break for the door.

Nooooo!

He laughed as I held onto his arms for dear life.

Oh my Goddess, he's going to kill me.

"God Michael, what did you do to the poor thing. He's shaking!" I felt myself being lifted into another pair of arms.

I looked up to see a familiar face.

"Hey, River. Remember me?" A light-haired man asked.

I scrunched my face.

"Isaiah?"

His smile grew.

Derek came up from behind Isaiah, wrapping his arm around Isaiah's shoulder and peered down at me with his dark green eyes, "Wow, what a pretty thing. Alastair's a lucky guy." He smirked.

"Yeah, he is." Isaiah made a small, sad smile as he peered up at Derek.

The smell of fresh food filled our noses as the maids placed breakfast on the table. Everyone rushed to take their seats at the kitchen table. Isaiah gently put me down on the seat next to him, across from Michael. As Derek sat down across from Isaiah.

Derek began to yap away about some girl he had bagged the night before, as everyone ate.

Isaiah's eyes shone with such sadness as he looked at Derek. Laughing small, sad sounds at Derek's jokes on the girl.

Does he like Derek?

I poked Izzy gently in the arm as he drank a glass of orange juice. He turned his head with a raised brow.

"Is Derek your mate?" I whispered in his ear.

He coughed, almost choking on his orange juice as he grabbed for a napkin.

I watched through wide eyes as Derek rushed across the table just as Isaiah pulled himself together.

"Are you okay?!" He tilted Isaiah's face in his direction as he searched his face for any sign of pain.

"I'm fine, Der," He said softly through small coughs, "just got a little surprised there that's all."

Derek raised his eyebrow, "what did he say..?"

"Nothing, just a private joke," Isaiah smiled.

Joke?

"Okay..." Derek looked at me suspiciously before going back to his seat, and angrily chomping on his toast. The silence evaporated as conversation carried on.

"What made you think that?" Isaiah whispered to me, as Michael and Derek got into a heated battle on muscle versus brains.

"That you and Derek were mates?"

"Yeah, that."

I looked up at him, "the way you look at Derek. It's the way Alastair looks at me."

His eyes widened as he grew silent. He munched on his food silently as I watched.

Was he not going to answer my question?

Finally, after minutes of him silently eating, he looked up at me. His eyes were hooded with sadness and inner turmoil.

"No, we're not." He whispered.

"Do you love him?"

He sighed, looking at Derek then back at me. "You can't tell him," His eyes pleaded.

"Why are you so afraid to tell him?"

He laughed, a small broken sound, "Isn't it obvious?" I raised my brow, "We're not mates."

He stood up from his chair, creating a loud, screeching sound. Everyone looked up at him in confusion.

"Excuse me." He whispered as he rushed out of the room.

"Isaiah!" Derek shot up from his chair, his eyes full of concern.

"Don't."

He looked at me, anger and concern lacing his eyes, "What do you mean 'don't'? Isaiah-"

"I know, I'll go." I got up from my chair, ignoring Derek's yelling as I rushed out the door, hoping to catch up with Isaiah.

I ran around like a crazy person for what felt like hours. Eventually, I collapsed on the stairs of the pathway attempting to catch my breath. Not quite sure what to do. I had searched what seemed like the entire palace for Isaiah, but I couldn't seem to be able to find him anywhere. Where could he be?

"Without you, I feel broken." I heard a soft voice sing. So beautiful...

Isaiah.

I ran towards the voice until I found myself outside, surrounded by a field of flowers.

Where am I?

I looked around, everywhere I looked there were flowers. It was as if I was in an ocean of flowers.

There in the distance, sitting in a field of flowers, was Isaiah. He peered up at the moon as he sang. The song was so gentle, so sad.

"I love my heart,

I love my soul,

but what is it all without the keeper of both."

I crept up silently behind him and sat beside him, listening to him sing.

"I wonder,

If I were to disappear,

Would you even notice?"

A silent tear slid down his face, as he continued to sing.

"Is this broken love worth my pain,

Worth my agony,

Even if it takes me to me grave?"

I gasped. He jumped, as he pivoted his head in my direction.

"River? What are you doing here?" He turned his head nervously, "Is-"

"No, I told him not to come," I smiled, wiping away his tear with the pad of my thumb.

He let out a breath of relief as he smiled at me, "Thank you."

I smiled.

We both turned away from each other to peer up at the moon silently.

It wasn't an awkward silence, rather a comfortable one, as we both laid on the cool greenery, arms behind our heads as we admired the beautiful moon above us.

"I know, I'm being stupid."

I turned away from the moon to look at him, "Why are you being stupid?"

He turned to look at me, "I love someone who I can never be with." He smiled sadly.

"Why not?"

He looked at me in confusion, "I'm not his mate."

"So?"

"So, I cannot be with him," He said simply, as he turned back to the moon, "just like the moon, he's unreachable. I can never call him mine."

Is that so? Can he really never be with Derek, because of something as trivial as not being mates? If he loves him so, shouldn't that be enough to be with him?

"Even if I were to tell him my feelings, he would never accept them," he continued sadly, "I wouldn't blame him, what would be the point? Ruin our friendship over something as trivial as my feelings-"

"It doesn't sound very trivial to me."

He sighed, "River, you don't understand-"

"No, I think I do. You love Derek and he clearly cares about as well if the way he looks at you says anything-"

"No, he loves me. I know that. But he isn't in love with me, River. That's where the difference between our feelings for one another differentiate."

"What if he did, what if he did love you?"

He was silent for a few minutes before he finally answered, "it wouldn't change anything. He still wouldn't be my mate and I his. One day he will find his mate and he'll forget about me. Giving myself false hope will only make it worse."

"What about your mate? What if you find your mate first? Will you forget about him?"

"That won't happen." He said simply.

"Why?"

"Derek isn't one someone can easily forget," he laughed a small, sad sound, "and even if I could, I don't have a mate."

He doesn't have a mate?

"I'm a Sola wolf."

My eyes widened at his words. A Sola wolf. A term most parents used to scare their children into doing their chores and children used as scary stories to tell their friends. By definition, they are lone wolves, wolves who were mates of stillborn children, or those who die early on in their lives. They are wolves who have no mate. Many times they turned feral and were put down. Other times they were used as knights, secret weapons who don't hesitate in battle. After all, they had nothing to lose.

He stood up, dusting himself off as I laid there in shock.

"I'm going to go to sleep," he yawned, "I'll see you in the morning, River."

"Yeah, see you in the morning, Isaiah," I smiled, standing up as well.

He laughed as he reached into my hair and pulled out a flower, "here you go." he smiled.

"Thanks," I blushed, taking it from his fingers.

"If you go up those flights of stairs they lead directly to Alastair's room," Isaiah said, pointing to a flight of stairs by the fountain of roses.

"Thanks," I smiled, racing toward the stairs.

"Oh, and River," I heard him call.

I turned to look at him.

He smiled at me, "You can call me Izzy."

I smiled back and waved until he was out of view before rushing to my room. I slammed the door behind me, before tearing through the room until I found what I was looking for. I smiled as I found a piece of parchment and ink.

I started what I should have started earlier.

I placed the flower down as I began to write.

Dear Alastair,

Oh, how I miss you so. I've decided to do what you told me to. I'm going to write a list of things I want us to do together when you return.

I began.

1) have a picnic in the flower garden, beneath the moonlight.