Subject 1: Yes?

Subject 2: Are you okay?

[Prolonged silence.]

Subject 1: I need to see the sky.

Subject 2: Instincts?

Subject 1: They're breathing in my skull. I can feel the light all the way out to my fingers, in my bones, through my whole body. It sings.

Subject 2: I know. I know. You have to be stronger than it... we're going to get through this. Approximately 100 days to deus ex machina, right? People don't usually die on quests. It's like a five percent chance. I looked it up because of the deer thing.

Subject 1: That's not helping. You already know we're unlucky.

Subject 2: Sorry.

Subject 1: It hurts so much.

Subject 2: [Subject rakes claws against the hole. It has widened significantly. Finally, he manages to stick a few fingers through.]

Subject 1: [Subject takes his fingers in her hand.] Talk about something stupid.

Subject 2: What?

Subject 1: Just do it, okay?

Subject 2: Food.

Subject 1: Oh no. Not food.

Subject 2: I used to subsist entirely on ramen noodles.

Subject 1: [Subject laughs.] Oh, no...

Subject 2: Yeah, my parents brought them in for me. My dad thought it was funny how quickly I took to them, but by the time it wasn't funny I already had a serious craving that no food of legitimate nutritional quality could fill. Anyways, they tried to save me, so I took something akin to a Home Ec class for a year. My parents wanted me to learn life skills, but we actually just learned that I shouldn't be allowed to live on my own.

Subject 1: It couldn't have been that bad.

Subject 2: I almost broke their car without driving it, blew out all the power in the house, bleached a color load of laundry with damages totalling in the hundreds of dollars, and almost set the kitchen on fire when I tried to cook Chex Mix.

Subject 1: How did you burn Chex Mix?!

Subject 2: Apparently, you need to stick it in a microwave--it wasn't that bad! Stop staring at me like that!

Subject 1: [Subject is laughing. Sound is vaguely inhuman, with the slightest cooing noise attached to it. This subsides into coughing.] You ate it too, didn't you?

Subject 2: Maybe?!

Subject 1: Ohhhh no.

Subject 2: What? It's still food.

Subject 1: Burnt food is full of carcinogens! How don't you know this?

Subject 2: Okay, I might be what you'd call "intellectually sheltered". Anyways, doesn't cookie dough give you samonella? Do not eat cookie dough?

Subject 1: Cookie dough tastes good. It's not even the same.

Subject 2: Maybe I enjoy burnt food.

Subject 1: Maybe my favorite genre of music is industrial noise.

Subject 2: People are into that. You've never heard of the concept of borrowed sound? A lot of legitimate musicians put random everyday noises into their work, and then there's this whole deal with Futurist music that's literally just noise...

Subject 1: You know that but not that burnt food has carcinogens. Truly you have an incredibly distorted repertoire of information at your disposal.

Subject 2: No correlation! None at all!

Subject 1: Actually, I do know a fair bit of food. I wanted to be a chef from when I was four to when I was seven. I had an easy bake oven and everything.

Subject 2: I want to shove my head in an easy bake oven.

Subject 1: Remind me never to let you touch my easy bake oven.

Subject 2: Fried fox.

Subject 1: It's not an easy bake frier, they're not even close, it's a... ow. Ow. Ow ow ow. [Subject begins to hyperventilate.] Something else. Please.

Subject 2: You're really taxing my unexciting life, here.

Subject 1: [Subject's voice is shrill, almost desperate.] You can make anything interesting. There's something about the way you talk. It's so spiteful, but almost in a comedic way... I don't know, is this making any sense? I just like listening to you.

Subject 2: [Subject's face is bright red.] That is the first time anyone has ever complimented my speaking patterns.

Subject 1: Speak a little faster then. [Slight sadness return to Subject's face.] Hustle.

Subject 2: Geez! Fine! Actually, now that I'm thinking of especially dumb shit, have you heard of the Extra videos? I found them on the internet while looking for clean material my parents wouldn't pick up on to create YouTube remixes with... okay, so choosing an Extra-centric video was a bad idea, they deleted it... but anyways, they're hilarious.

Subject 1: We watched a few in kindergarten.

Subject 2: Other fun, wild facts: kindergarten is German for garden of children. I love public school. I love Germany. Isn't that bullshit? We're growing kids here. Take them out back and shove water down the throats of the little bitches. Put them in the soil. Peel the eyes off and use them to grow more children. Like potatoes.

Subject 1: Stop!

Subject 2: I have a whole essay prepared on this.

Subject 1: Why?! How could you possibly have the time or mental energy to do this?

Subject 2: I have a whole board of dumb ideas, actually. Most of them are these intensively stupid similes that I used to write down in journals, whenever I remembered them when I got back from sitting outside all day.

Subject 1: Are you still doing it?

Subject 2: ... I want to but I don't know if it wants me to do it.

Subject 1: [Subject pauses.] Keep talking.

Subject 2: [Subject's voice shakes.] Right. So, I claimed I was watching them for educational purposes when my parents found me, because I wanted to know how to collaborate with "them"... my parents told me I just shouldn't talk to any Extras, anyways, because there are all these studies on how benign activity or interaction with Extras leads to Extra-dom. They didn't point this out in the videos, in fact, they had it under the "myths and facts" section-- that was a riot.

[Subject uses cold, mechanical voice.]

Myth: Extras bite people.

Facts: All people bite people. You've probably bitten someone. Yes, you. There is no moral high ground here.

Subject 1: No-o-o. I would never.

Subject 2: Extras are just like people, but they have special needs. It's a known fact that all Extras are sick of your shit. You are thusly advised to shut up and stop asking us prying questions about how we probably saved your world--yes, your petty, mortal world--from some force of great and sinister evil.

Subject 1: We haven't done much world-saving yet.

Subject 2: Well, they've given us the superpowers we'd need to do it, haven't they? Seems like a serious judgement error on their part.

Subject 1: I guess. What did the videos really say, though?

Subject 2: Agh. It was almost entirely that guy. You know, the guy? White teeth, beautiful, windswept hair, strong jaw... the Spinel man?

Subject 1: The Spienwell dynasty! Specifically, I believe you're thinking about Arthur Spienwell the Second?

Subject 2: Yeah. He's all over them, and then his son is the main child actor. You can't take either of them seriously, because the whole time they switch between explaining basic human courtesy and "how to deal with your classmate's spontaneous combustion" with the same smile on their face. Even worse, there's this high synth music pounding over the whole thing and it's the worst, catchiest synth you've ever heard in your life.

Subject 1: That's great.

Subject 2: I know, right? I guess I have to give them a little credit-- most of it was casual manners. You'd be surprised how many people need to be reminded to treat people like people, but I guess most people have bricks for brains. That, and there's no catch-alls, so they couldn't spend five hours going into more detail than basic archetypal species like werewolves--like there are many werewolf Extras in the eighties, anyways-- and then some basic quests. We're all super different. When we go back to your school, hell, there are going to be people who've been to other worlds, people who've been to other dimensions, probably some people who aren't entirely human... like us.

Subject 1: You sound almost excited.

Subject 2: Don't you think it'll be nice to have someone else who understands when we get back there? It's going to be so bizarre. I mean, no matter what happens... there'll be you.

Subject 1: I don't think I'm ever going to let go of you when I can properly hold you. I'm going to hold you in my weird sharp fingers and we're going to cry and eat ice cream.

Subject 2: [Subject smiles, leaning into wall.] You better?

Subject 1: A little.

Subject 2: Great. I feel like shit. I need someone to touch me. Wait, that sounds awful. I mean-- it's cold. I hate being alone like this.

Subject 1: I'm right here.

Subject 2: I can barely reach you.

Subject 1: [Silence ensues.] See, that was almost happy there for... ten seconds.

Subject 2: Woof.

Subject 1: Do foxes even bark?

Subject 2: [Subject smiles again, uneasily. The teeth and eyes have progressed nicely since last official check up (see official documentation) and eye rimming is visible. Combat capabilities should be tested soon using sound-based cues.] This fox cries like a baby.

[Subject 1 laughs, which transcends into a coughing fit. Noise continues, dulling, and a faint whine can be heard in the distance from down the hall. This is followed by rasping breath, which overtakes the sound of the quieting subject.]

[SURVEILLANCE ENDS.]