I know I'm acting irrationally right now. I'm obviously not myself.

With every minute that passes, I feel more and more awful. Hayden must be worried to death. I know he sleeps less than I do, because he stays up late, just to wake me up from my nightmares when they hit again.

It's not what he deserves. It's not what we are.

"Are you on your period or something?" Jasmine's voice startles me, and I turn to see my best friend storm toward me with a look that's about ready to kill. "I mean, really now. Why are you acting that way? Hayden is worried sick, same as your dad. You can't just run off like that—you know what happened!" she rambles on, seeming seriously pissed off by now.

"I don't want everyone to act like I'm some fragile china doll!" I cross my arms in front of my chest, still startled by her sudden appearance as I enter the park close to the apartment building.

"Well, tough shit—because you are. That outburst proved just that." I know she's pushing me on purpose; I should just swallow it. But it rubs me the wrong way, and so I come to a halt before I turn around to look at her.

"What is that supposed to mean?"

Jas raises an eyebrow, bracing her hand on her hip when she answers, "You're acting like a brat, Mimi. To people who don't deserve it. If you're angry at someone, be angry at Meredith, because she's the source of all this bullshit."

I regard her for a moment, and I quickly realize her words are true. I'm acting out on the people who have only ever been supportive and loving toward me. "I just... I don't understand, Jas. Why did she hate me so much?"

"Oh, Mimi..." All rage vanishes from her features when the tears stream down my face, and I can't even blink with how quickly she throws her arms around me, squeezing me so tightly I almost can't breathe.

"What did I do? Why do these people hate me so much? I've done nothing wrong, have I?" I sob into the hug, having a hard time controlling my sorrow.

"It's not on you, sweetie... These people are vultures. They just want to see people suffer to create a great story."

"And Kim? Did she really think that would've worked? I mean—"

"That woman is the devil's spawn. I'm sure she didn't think much when she came up with that stupid idea. I don't believe she has a brain, to begin with."

I can't help but laugh at her words, slowly feeling like I can calm down. Stepping out of her embrace, I wipe away the last bout of tears as I look at her. "I just feel so overwhelmed with everything. I don't even know what's going on."

She studies me for a second, and it's almost like something clicks inside her head before she takes her hand in mine, her gaze determined. "I know where we're going to go."

***

"Okay, I'll need to make a quick phone call. You should let Hayden know where you are—you know how worried he is."

"Yeah, you're right. I'll text him."

"Mimi." Jasmine shuts me down. "Come on. You love that man. You might at least indulge him with a phone call."

I sigh at her words, knowing that ultimately, she's right. He deserves to hear from me, and to be honest, I already miss him too.

Jas doesn't even wait for my response when she says, "Okay, I'll step outside. Just let me know when you're done." She presses a quick kiss on my cheek and steps out of the car.

I stare at my phone, the nerves overwhelming me. I don't want Hayden to be mad at me, or annoyed, or hurt by my behavior. I feel like such a bitch, and so goddamn overpowered by my emotions...

But I know I can't go home again. I need to do this with Jasmine. And so I dial his number, and the first ring doesn't even stop before he answers.

"Mila?"

"Hi." I choke back the tears just from hearing his voice.

"Fuck, Mila, I've been so worried."

"I know, I'm sorry, I..." The lump in my throat makes me stop my sentence. I don't want to break down now.

"Baby, what's going on?"

"I don't know. It's just all too much."

"I know, love." He takes a deep and shaky breath, the sound causing my heart to ache. "I know. I'm so sorry. I don't know how to help you."

"That's not your responsibility, Hay—"

"Of course it fucking is. You're my woman. I'd do anything to make you feel better—you know that."

And just like that, a smile tugs at my lips. It's what he does, what he always managed to do. "I do. I really do. But I don't think this is something you can help me with, more than you already do." I can hear the gears turning in his head; he's thinking about what to say or do.

"Jas is taking me to prison." I use the silence at the other end of the line to get that fact out in the open.

"She what?"

"Yeah, we're going to see Meredith. I need to know why she did all of that."

"I don't know, Mila." He sighs, sounding less than impressed by the news. "I don't like the thought of you being there."

"Jas is with me. You know she can kick ass if she wants to."

Hayden laughs at that, and I chuckle right with him, watching how Jas is having an argument with someone over the phone.

"You still have that pepper spray, right?" His question conjures a smirk on my lips.

"I'm pretty sure the prison guards won't be too pleased if I show up with that."

"Tell them you're Sam's daughter, and they'll give you a private escort, for sure."

"You realize this is the woman's facility we're going to, right?"

"Shit." He laughs. "Didn't think of that."

I join his laughter, resting my head against the window as I take a deep breath. "I'll be fine. I promise."

"You'll call me as soon as you're out?"

"I will. Jas has something else planned, though. I don't know when we'll be back."

"Something else?" He asks the same question that's on my mind.

"Yeah, no idea. She won't tell me what it is. I'll keep you updated."

"Okay..."

There's another pause as I watch Jas hang up the phone, her eyebrows raised when she looks at me in question. I shoot her a smile and nod, letting her know she can come back inside. "Hayden?"

"Yes, love?"

"Thank you for calling her," I say as Jasmine takes a seat behind the steering wheel.

"She told you."

"She didn't have to. But I mean it. Thank you."

"Anything for you, Lucky."

A blush creeps into my cheeks, earning myself an exaggerated eye roll from Jasmine when I whisper down the line, "I love you."

"I love you too. Always."

"Always."

***

The women's facility isn't much different from the one my dad was in, and since Jas called ahead, which explains her vivid phone call before, everything happens pretty quickly. We go through security and get escorted into a huge waiting area; the white walls combined with metal chairs and tables make everything look very clinical.

"Damn, it's scary in here," Jas whispers in my ear while we follow the guard.

"Yeah, this is worse than the one Dad was in," I whisper back while taking in my surroundings.

Jas takes my hand and leads us to the table the guard points to, saying the prisoner will be with us shortly.

The setting is different than what I'm used to. With Dad, they only allowed me to see him behind the plexiglass wall, but I guess Meredith's charges are less dangerous than Dad's. She faces different security measures.

The loud buzzing noise from the other side of the room makes both Jas and I tense up, her hand instantly finding mine as she nods to the door that now opens.

"Here comes the witch," she whispers, and I have to stifle a chuckle before I turn my head to find a very pissed-looking Meredith step forward, two guards by her side as they escort her to our table.

"You have fifteen minutes. No touching, and don't leave those seats before you let us know," the guard orders after Meredith takes a seat in front of us, the tension reaching its high when they walk to the corner of the room, their eyes trained on us.

"Why are you even here?" Meredith asks, looking at anything but us, her words laced with venom.

I can tell Jas wants to rip her head off already, but I squeeze her hand beneath the table, letting her know I'm ready. "I just want to know why," I say.

"Why?" She scoffs. "Are you seriously asking that?"

"I didn't do anything to you. I thought we were friends."

"Friends? Being friends with someone like you isn't exactly easy, Mila."

Jas leans forward, shooting daggers at Meredith when she mutters through gritted teeth, "Watch your mouth."

"Of course!" Meredith laughs. "Big sis Jasmine has to step in now."

"What are you even talking about?" I chime in, suddenly having enough of her attitude.

"Really? Are you this clueless, Mila?"

"Seems like it. Why don't you enlighten me?" I fire back, absolutely sick of her bullshit.

"Goddammit, Mila. I've worked my ass off to get to where I am. I've spent day and night working and researching to get my articles out and published. I've been out there, going to these stupid parties to make a name for myself. I slept with executives to get them to consider me for their open positions, and still I didn't achieve shit."

Jasmine's eyes widen. "Wait, you slept with people to get a better job?"

"That's not what this is about, Jesus Christ, Jasmine..."

"What is this about then, Meredith?" I ask.

Meredith just laughs again, a laugh that sounds almost maniacal, and I can't help but shiver when she says, "It's about you, for fuck's sake! Little shy Mila, who never goes out, joins Jasmine once and ends up meeting Hayden fucking Cross! I mean, are you for real?" she almost yells at us now, raising the guards' attention with every word. "And then he even wants you! Like, what the hell? You don't belong with him—Kim at least fits into his social status. I mean, the only reason I worked with her was because she paid really well, and she promised to give me exclusive interviews with her connections. I couldn't know she'd be too stupid to hire the right guy and I end up here..."

I'm pretty sure Jas would've exploded already if it weren't for the guards approaching us, watching Meredith like hawks when Jasmine says, "Are you serious right now? I thought we all were friends!"

"We all? It's always been you and Mila. You lived together, spent most of your time together, went on vacations... I was just someone who tagged along every now and then. When Mila met Hayden, things finally worked out for me. I had all the info, knew how to work him and her... It was too easy not to do it, really."

Anger rises within me at her words; the fact that she so blatantly threw what I thought was a friendship away has me seething with rage, and I'm trying my hardest not to lash out on her and land in a prison cell myself. "So you did all of this. Betrayed your best friend, tried to destroy her life, assisted in her attempted kidnapping...just because you wanted to be famous?" I ask, close to exploding now.

"Not 'just because,' Mila. It was all I ever wanted. All I ever aimed and worked for. And anyone who stands in my way...well, they'll see what happens."

"God." Jasmine scoffs. "You seriously need professional help."

Meredith snorts, and at that moment I realize just how mentally ill she actually is. This woman holds no answers for me. It won't make me feel better to listen to her anymore.

"Mila is the one who looks like she hasn't slept in weeks." She throws me a smug grin. "Pretty sure she's the one who needs help here."

Her words are all it takes for me to jump up from my chair, Jas immediately on my heels. "We're done here," I say while gesturing to the guards, and they immediately grab Meredith by her elbows, making her get up from her chair.

"You know, Mila, you act innocent and cute, but we all know you're the biggest bitch of them all. Even Kim has nothing on you," Meredith fires again, and Jasmine is already about to lunge for her, but I grab the arm of her jacket, holding her back from doing something she might regret.

Meredith's words don't get to me. She's petty; I know that now. And people can call me a lot of things that would hurt me, but this isn't one of them. "Have a good life, Mer."

"Fuck you!" she yells after us, but Jas and I have stormed out of there. As soon as we get through all the doors, I dash outside, looking for the nearest bush before emptying my stomach contents in the grass.

"Mimi, are you okay?" Jasmine appears right behind me, rubbing my back and handing me a bottle of water she magically pulled out of her bag.

I nod, taking a sip of the water to calm the nausea still running through my veins. "Yeah, thanks. She just makes me nauseated."

Jas laughs at that, but I can still see she's not fully convinced when she replies, "I understand that. Come on, I guess my next stop will be good for you, then."

"What's the next stop?"

"Wait and see, Mimi."