Arrowan

Everything went perfectly, but I was having a hard time pretending everything was normal and Luin was struggling even harder with it.

We still stayed holed up in either our home or in the magic shop. We still didn't risk walking between the houses. We both wore warded clothes so we couldn't be tracked down. Not much had changed except that I no longer had planning to keep me occupied.

I truly thought it might get worse after Fen moved out. He got a teaching job at that academy and moved out the next weekend. Our first afternoon having the house back to ourselves, Luin was fidgety and anxious on the couch. I tried to focus on reading my book while I waited for him to tell me what was on his mind, but he outlasted my patience.

"Something on your mind?" I asked.

Luin shrugged. "I was just thinking... we started sharing a room because Fen needed the other bedroom. He's gone now, though."

What? I thought we had been doing so well! He couldn't be about to suggest that we go back to staying in separate bedrooms, could he?

"I just wanted to say... if you wanted more space, I would understand. I can move back across the hall if that's what you want," Luin finished, looking down at his hands.

"That's not what I want at all," I told him honestly. The full, unfiltered truth was that I wanted more intimacy with him, not less. We had known each other for over a month now and our bond was still a half-developed thing between us. We still hadn't moved past kissing. I still didn't truly know him. We had let ourselves fall into the routine of domestic life without ever building up a foundation to make it really solid and long-lasting. There had been too much stress, too much confinement.

We needed to reset.

Luin launched himself at me, hugging me tightly. I hugged him back, ducking my head down to enjoy the fresh scent of laundry and his favorite soap that clung to him. "I don't want it either. I just needed to check."

Once that was settled, Luin's mood improved considerably, and I took the opportunity to break away. I told him I was going to the garage to work on my sculpting. I finally had all the tools I needed, at least for my first project, and I finally felt like I had the time to devote to it. I couldn't stop thinking about how trapped we both were, though. How long would it be before the paranoia wore off and let us reach some semblance of normalcy?

Luin deserved better; we both did.

I put my welder away before I even used it and walked outside before I could think better of it. I felt exposed and vulnerable, and even though I had never considered myself a coward, there was a very real impulse screaming at me to run back inside, behind the wards, where I knew it was safe. I tamped that down and walked to the sidewalk.

I was paranoid enough that I looked all around me as I headed down the street, but as I kept moving forward without anyone jumping out at me, I started feeling better. I walked all the way to the end of the street and had almost made it back to the house when Luin came tearing down the sidewalk.

As he grew closer, I realized his face was red and his cheeks had tear tracks running down them. The whites of his eyes were red, too, and his mercury irises were glowing with magic. That was all I had time to take in before he slammed himself against me. "Are you okay?" he asked breathlessly.

"I'm fine. What happened?"

Luin pulled away and glared at me a second before he started raining gentle blows on my chest with his fists. "What happened? I have no idea what happened! You tell me."

I frowned while my mind scrambled, but I couldn't think of anything that would have brought Luin's temper down on me like this. I was finally forced to concede. "I don't know what you mean."

"Ugh!" he said in disgust. "I went to see if you needed a snack or something to drink and you weren't there, Arrowan. I thought you'd been taken, but of course I can't track you because of these stupid warded clothes you're wearing, so I was left doing a search on foot. You weren't at Glenna and Safiya's, so I had to meander the street hoping something awful hadn't happened to you. How could you?"

Oh.

Okay, now that I thought about it, it probably hadn't been my most brilliant idea to leave our safe area for the first time without telling Luin I was doing it. "I'm sorry, you're right."

His eyes flashed, literally. It seemed conceding I'd done wrong only fueled his anger with me. "I know I'm right." He glared for a few seconds, waiting on an answer I couldn't formulate. What more was there to say, other than that I was sorry?

Luin seemed to realize I was floundering and he sighed. The anger faded from his rolling eyes and he fell against my chest in another hug. "Don't do it again, okay?"

"Okay," I agreed, and pressed a kiss to the top of his head. "But hey, look around us."

Luin pulled away and looked around, and I saw the instant it clicked for him. A slow smile spread across his face and he laughed breathlessly. "We're outside."

"And no one is chasing us," I added. The true test would be in the nighttime, when the dark would allow any pursuers to freely use shadow magic, but in that moment, I truly believed we were in the clear. I was officially dead. "Let's go somewhere."

Luin caught onto my light mood and grinned. I smiled back and his eyes flashed happily. "Like where?"

"Does it matter? Anywhere you want." I didn't know the area all that well, anyway. We hadn't had much time for Luin to show me around before the Unseelie found us here after my arrival – just that shopping day when we went to a restaurant.

Luin thought for a few seconds. "Have you ever been ice skating?"

"Um, no." And if we were being completely honest, I really didn't want to. Luin looked so excited that an agreement slipped from my lips, anyway. "You'll have to teach me."

Luin took my hand and started leading me back to the house. His steps were eager and mine lagged until he looked back, clearly confused by my dragging feet, and I quickened my pace. We locked the doors once we got inside and Luin teleported us to a remote corner of the city's recreation center.

Being in such a public place after so many weeks of isolation was jarring and strange. The rec center was the home of many community classes. It was a massive, sprawling structure that Luin took the time to show me before leading me to the ice skating rink. There was a gym for gymnastics, where little kids were learning how to spin over a high bar. There was a huge swimming pool where parents were dipping their babies in and out of the water as an instructor called cheerful instructions that echoed throughout the cavernous room. There was a basketball court and nets for volleyball and so many other activities they made my head spin. Luin and I could come here every day for weeks and not get bored.

The noise, the people scattered everywhere, and the scent of so many sweaty activities overwhelmed my senses, but in a good way, somehow. I felt lit up and excited. I didn't even mind, so much, that we were here for ice skating. The atmosphere made up for it.

"This doesn't seem like your kind of place," I observed as Luin pulled me along.

"It's not usually, but I do love ice skating," Luin answered dismissively.

Everyone here was so... casual. They wore jeans and sweatshirts and baggy tees. The few who were dressed up were in clothes meant to catch attention. No one was dressed like Luin, in his long-sleeved button-down shirt, waistcoat, and pressed pants. His hair was neatly pulled back in a queue, streaming down his back as the bronze highlights flashed oddly under the florescent lighting. Between Luin's hair, the slight point of his ears, and his eyes that didn't look human on a normal day, but which were even more inhuman now as they glowed with excitement, it was a wonder we weren't drawing more attention. Everyone seemed happy to ignore us, though – even the woman who took our money for rink admission and skate rentals. Most people were too wrapped up in their own lives to really notice the strangers around them, but it was incomprehensible to me that anyone could ignore Luin.

I managed to get my skates on by myself – or so I thought, until Luin looked down at my work and scowled. "You need to tighten your laces more than that. Trust me."

I reached down to do it, but his hands swatted mine out of the way and he did it for me. That was just the start. For the rest of the afternoon, I felt more taken care of than ever before in my life. My family had been distant from me since I was very young. It would be easy to blame that on their knowledge of my Seelie bond mate, but I truly believed that was just how my parents were. My cousins, aunts, and my brother were all distant and disengaged too. No one even spoke of my grandparents. So, nurturing was something I was starting to associate with Luin alone, and it felt better than I ever imagined.

After he retied my skates for me, Luin walked backwards in front of me, holding both my hands for stability while I got used to walking on blades. It wasn't so hard, though my ankles kept wobbling into the hard sides of the skates. They would be sore later, I could already tell. Looking into Luin's bright eyes, I didn't care.

I had seen a fawn taking its first steps. It staggered and splayed its legs out awkwardly and took a couple of dips. My first steps on ice felt a lot like that, but worse. If it hadn't been for Luin's hands still firmly clasped in mine, I would have gone down hard. How Luin managed to stay balanced on his own skates and keep me upright at the same time, I didn't know. With what appeared to be very little effort, he led me to the side of the rink, where I happily clung for dear life while taking small, shuffling steps.

Luin laughed at my slow progress around the rink, and his happiness had me laughing, too. "Why don't you show me what you can do?" I offered. If he loved ice skating so much, it had to be hard to stay and watch me stagger around.

"I don't know," Luin said reluctantly, but his eyes grew even brighter and I caught the way they looked over the ice ahead of us wistfully.

"Come on, I want to see you doing this right. Maybe it'll inspire me to do better." When he glanced at me, I winked, and he grinned.

"Okay. I'll be quick."

And boy, was he. I knew he had meant he wouldn't leave me alone here for long, but truly, his speed was impressive. So was the easy way he glided over the ice. I had always thought his movements were especially fluid and graceful, but on the ice, that was magnified. He glided around a crowd of teenage girls, then wove around several individuals and couples until he got to an expanse of empty ice. Then the show started. He pivoted so he was going backwards and his skates seamlessly passed over and around each other before he launched and did a midair twirl, landing on one foot with his other leg held out behind him exactly parallel to the ice. He made quick work of skating around the rink, and when he slowed to join me again, it sent a spray of what looked like snow flying up.

He was grinning in exhilaration and leaned over to kiss my cheek. "Thanks, I needed that."

"Where did you learn to skate like that?" I asked.

He shrugged and helped me when I somehow stumbled again, even though I was still clinging to the outside border of the rink. "I used to have a lot of free time, and I didn't know many people. When I wasn't working, I was alone... so I took some classes to try and make friends. I learned some cooking, how to knit, and how to skate. None of it helped me connect with people, but it turns out I really love ice skating. I usually come here at least once a week, and I've kept up on my lessons."

"Well, the lessons are paying off," I said. "You looked incredible out there."

Luin blushed and looked away, though he couldn't seem to fight off an adorable smile. "Thanks. Now, do you think you're ready to try getting off that wall?"

I grimaced but he looked so eager that I nodded anyway and clutched onto his offered hand like a lifeline. After a few more laps, it wasn't so scary anymore and I felt like I had gotten my bearings. Oh, I was still staggering around the rink rather than gliding on it, but after a couple of hours, I could manage without Luin's hand. Not that I told him that. It was better to have the excuse to cling to him.