Luin

I closed my eyes and let myself have a few moments of appreciating successfully navigating that conversation with Fen. I knew just how he uncertain and afraid felt about going to meet his bond mate, and he really did need to push through it. My work wasn't done, though – now there was another conversation I had to have.

This was a two-bedroom house. If Fen stayed here with us, he needed somewhere to sleep. It hadn't seemed like a big deal when I agreed to Fen staying here. After all, he really did have nowhere else to go. Of course I couldn't turn him away. But it meant Arrowan and I had a choice. Either someone would sleep on the couch and have no private space of their own or I'd need to move into Arrowan's room. We had shared a bed the night of the attack and it had been kind of great. I felt safer with him there, and it was an incredible feeling to not be alone in the darkness. And Arrowan had been such a gentleman, so caring and without any hint of wanting more physically than I was ready to give him. But maybe he had just held himself back because of what we'd just been through. Maybe he would be pushy now.

Yet, even as I thought it, I couldn't really believe Arrowan would pressure me. But how would he feel about suddenly losing his personal space? We spent almost all of our time shut in this house, safe behind its impregnable wards. It was important for us to be able to retreat from one another when we felt the need. No matter how much you loved someone, you were always going to need some personal space from them – my mother had taught me that. She would retreat to the kitchen when she was particularly annoyed with my father, shooing out anyone who tried to encroach on her space with a cookie, a kiss, and a firm warning not to come back until mealtime. When my dad needed time, he retreated to the greenhouse. If my parents could still need space from each other even after decades together, I knew Arrowan and I would need space, too.

This wasn't my decision alone, I reminded myself. It was up to Arrowan, too. I went to the kitchen and found him layering sheet noodles, sauce, and cheese. "I saw someone make lasagna on TV yesterday and wanted to try it out. Have you ever had it before?"

"Not in a long time. It sounds great." And it looked great, too. How was Arrowan able to watch a cooking show and retain enough of what he'd seen to be able to reproduce it? Especially with cooking. If I tried that, it would be a disaster.

Arrowan grinned and went back to work. This didn't seem like a great time for a hard conversation, since it looked like what he was doing took concentration, but I was sort of relieved not to have to worry about Arrowan being able to study me too closely. Goodness knew I'd be blushing like a fool the whole time.

"So, Fen's exiled from Alterra," I began awkwardly.

Arrowan glanced over his shoulder at me, then looked back at his work. "I figured."

"And he doesn't know anyone else here," I added, trying to ease into the conversation.

"He's lucky he knows you," Arrowan replied, sounding utterly unconcerned.

"So he doesn't have any place to stay," I continued.

Arrowan looked back at me again, and I thought he looked amused. What was so funny about this? "I figured that too."

"Right," I muttered, then cleared my throat. "So I was thinking..."

Arrowan's attention stayed fixed on me even though he had a long sheet of noodle draped between his hands. "Yeah?"

"I was thinking that he might..." Gosh, why couldn't I get the words out? I blamed Arrowan. He was acting weird.

"You were thinking he should stay with us," Arrowan filled in, still looking and sounding like he didn't have a care in the world. That glint was still in his eyes, though – that spark of amusement. What on Earth was going through his mind?

"Yes." I fought hard to keep my expression smooth even though I felt like I should be apologizing. Arrowan and I were still getting to know each other. Bringing a roommate into the situation – and having more adults than bedrooms in the house – wasn't the ideal.

"Luin, stop looking so worried. Of course he's going to stay with us. What, did you think I would refuse? This isn't even my house."

He was definitely amused. I started feeling irritated. "Well, why didn't you just say so?"

He shrugged, smiling charmingly. "You're cute when you're flustered."

Okay, I was definitely irritated now. "Well, if you're so all-knowing, why don't you tell me how we should handle the bedroom situation?"

All the amusement and charm melted away and Arrowan turned around to finally face me, still holding that dang noodle. His eyes were soft on mine. "We'll do whatever makes you comfortable. Fen can take my room. I'll either sleep on the couch or... or I could stay with you. Only if you feel ready for that, though."

I glared at him, but it took effort since his answer had erased all of my irritation. How dare he be so sweet when I was upset with him? I couldn't even hold the glare for more than a few seconds. "Do you mean it?" I asked.

"Of course."

So it was up to me. I thought about what I wanted, but it was a wasted effort. I already knew. It was just too awkward to come out and say it. I struggled to convince my mouth to form the words for so long that Arrowan took pity on me and said, "You don't have to decide right now."

See? See how sweet he was? Of course I couldn't stay mad for long. "You can stay with me," I said.

He grinned at that. "Okay, I'll move my things over after I'm done with this," he said, gesturing to the half-made lasagna. "But I need you to do something for me."

"What?" Arrowan hardly ever asked for anything.

"I need you to promise that you'll tell me if you change your mind."

I really might be bonded with the perfect man, I thought. I closed the space between us and wrapped my arms around his neck, pulling him down so I could kiss him. His hands gripped my waist and I heard the noodle hit the ground. It didn't matter right now, because he was sucking on my bottom lip and the sensation had me on my tiptoes, pressing even harder against him.

Arrowan's tongue swept over my lower lip and I gasped, and then his tongue was in my mouth, tangling with mine. It should have been gross. Every other time I thought about this kind of kissing, it sounded unhygienic and sloppy, but I could see now why people did it. It felt like nothing else I had ever experienced before. It felt amazing.

Our bond grew again and instead of a quavering, it felt like great big tremors. We pulled apart and I caught a sheen of wonder in his startlingly-bright eyes.

"Your eyes are glowing," Arrowan said, laughing a bit. I swatted at him and he held my wrist. "No, no, I like it. You're gorgeous."

And there went the rest of my composure. I couldn't hold back a huge smile and I had to be blushing harder than ever before in my life. I almost didn't care just then, though. This was my bond mate, and he thought I was gorgeous. I was allowed to be happy. There was also the way it felt for our bond to have grown again. I could feel it now without directing any focus or magic into it. It was simply there, ready for me to tap into it with no effort at all.

What was the opposite of alone? Because that's how I felt – like I would never be alone again. And with Arrowan here, that was my new reality.

--

Fen returned late, long after Arrowan and I had eaten and put away our leftovers. Arrowan had gone to bed without me since I insisted I was fine waiting up for Fen alone. I couldn't go to sleep before he was settled into the room we'd vacated for him, and I really wanted to hear how things went.

Fen teleported onto the front porch, since he couldn't go directly through the wards around the house. They were keyed to only allow me and Arrowan direct access. I could key Fen in tomorrow, but it was definitely not a problem for tonight. When the wards flashed, I checked that it was him through the peephole and hollered to Arrowan it was just Fen, since I could feel his awareness through our bond. It was the first time I got anything except a general sense of how far away he was through our bond, and it was exciting that the bond's capabilities really were expanding.

Fen and I settled down on the couch, both of us cocooned in thick blankets. Something about being cozied up late at night changed the atmosphere entirely, and it felt like we were in a bubble of safe space. It was a nice feeling.

"So, what happened?" I asked.

"I couldn't learn much, but I saw him," Fen said, and his whole expression lit up. "He lives in Maine in this big school. I saw him outside teaching a class. His hair, it's this orange color that blazes when it catches the sunlight. I've never seen anything like it. You know how it is back home, with everyone having earth and metal shades for their hair and eyes."

"Not everyone," I said, thinking of Arrowan.

"Unseelie don't count," Fen scoffed. "We never saw them."

I held up my hands in surrender, not wanting to get into an argument when we had much more interesting things to talk about. "Sounds very exotic," I said, biting the inside of my cheek to try and keep from smiling.

Fen just nodded. "It is! And he has these freckles all over, they're adorable."

"Okay, so you've told me about how he looks. What about who he is?" I asked.

And just like that, Fen's excitement fizzled. "Well, I didn't exactly talk to him," he said.

"No?"

"See, he was working. And I can't exactly walk onto school grounds and say, 'Hi, I'm your soul mate, let's be together.' It's too sudden."

Fen had a point, but he could have made up some excuse to go in. Then again, Fen knew nothing about the human world, so he wouldn't know what kind of excuses to make for going to a school when he didn't even have a kid who needed schooling. Maybe Fen had made a good call. "Sorry, you're right."

Fen winced. "I really wanted to meet him, though."

"We'll come up with a plan. At least you know more than you did earlier," I pointed out, trying to cheer him up again.

Fen smiled a bit. "Yeah," he sighed dreamily.

Now that I had satisfied my curiosity as much as possible, exhaustion started dragging me down. "I think I'm going to head to bed. Let me show you your room."

We both got up and Fen neatly folded the blanket he had been using while I kept mine wrapped around my shoulders. I'd just wear it to bed and bring it back out tomorrow. I led him down the hall and opened his door, gesturing inside. The linens were all clean and the bed was neatly made up for him. I thought it looked welcoming, but I had no idea what kind of space Fen was used to having. Maybe he'd developed expensive tastes over the years?

"Thanks again for letting me stay with you," Fen said. I nodded absentmindedly, still trying to imagine the room from his perspective. Fen touched my wrist where it emerged from the blanket, holding the ends shut over my chest. "Really, Luin. I don't know what I would have done without you." I opened my mouth to speak, but he snorted and added, "Actually, I know exactly what I would have done without you – the same thing I've been doing for years. Seriously, thank you."

I smiled a little and hoped he stayed as grateful that I had snapped him out of his Alterran life. If things went badly with his bond mate, he might still come to regret it. "I didn't really do anything," I said.

"You're too modest," Fen said, and stepped back into the room. "I'm grateful and you're not having the last word." He shut the door in my face and I laughed. Fen always did have a knack for ending arguments this way.

I turned and faced the other bedroom door, then opened it slowly. I found Arrowan tucked up on one side of the bed, fast asleep. It was probably a good thing. The idea of sharing a bed with him tonight was daunting, and it was a lot easier to face without having to feel Arrowan's eyes on me. I quickly changed for bed and slipped in between the covers, feeling like I was sneaking around in forbidden territory. Maybe it would have been better if he'd been awake for this, after all.

Arrowan rolled over so he was facing me and his eyes opened just a bit, just enough that he could see me in the dim room. His lips twitched upward, though he wasn't quite awake enough to properly smile. "How's your friend?" he asked.

"Happy," I said. At least for now, it was the truth.

"Good," Arrowan said. "'G'night."

"Good night"

His eyes slipped shut and his expression went lax as he fell back asleep effortlessly. Meanwhile, I wriggled around in the bed, trying to get comfortable, until I was sure nothing I did was going to wake Arrowan. Then I gave into the pull between us, the one that had me sliding over until I was tucked up against him. Since Arrowan didn't generate heat the same way I did – maybe that was an Unseelie quirk or maybe it was just Arrowan – it wasn't too hot. In fact, I could have sworn he helped cool me down. I was usually way too warm at night since I liked having the weight of blankets pressing down on me too much to give them up when it got stuffy.

This was just another way Arrowan and I were good for each other. I added it to the ever-growing list in my mind and sighed happily. It wasn't long before I drifted to sleep.