Standing in the dressing room, I looked at my nightdress and then to the closed door. I knew that Alaric was out there, pacing the floor. He was already in his bed pants, tired and desperate for sleep. Yet there was this thing hanging between us, this issue.

We could not walk into the meeting tomorrow night as we are right now. Silas said something about it, the wedge that was between us was obvious. Our body language was giving us away. We could talk pleasantly, kiss and smile at each other but when we were in those in-between moments, we failed.

Something had to give, we could break through the wall and return to being something better than this. What were my issues with him? He lied about wanting me but did kind of want me. There was a list but Nisha explained that it was more about finding the right woman for Alaric. They'd discussed it and had agreed that to persuade the leaders that Alaric had his queen, she had to be many things. There was a checklist and I was the only one that managed to get the majority ticked off. These three had a thing for lists, I'd seen several tonight and I was beginning to hate the sight of pens and paper.

With a huff, I quickly changed into the night dress and opened the door, turning the light off. Alaric stopped and waited, trying not to be obvious.

"You're tired."

"It's been a long day."

I nodded and sat on the edge of the bed, patting the spot beside me. He was hesitant at first but then relented.

"We're in this really weird place right now it's really confusing. Time heals all wounds, right?"

Alaric nodded.

"We don't have time. So, this is my suggestion for getting us through tomorrow and doing it successfully. We progress physically for tonight and then when tomorrow is done, we go back to now and fix this. I'm not going to spend the rest of my life with someone that,"

I looked up at him and sighed.

"You know."

He nodded, kissing the edge of my shoulder.

"We will get better, I promise."

"I hope so Alaric, I really do."

Moving onto the bed, I laid down and watched as Alaric turned onto his knees, crawling over to me. There was a playfulness to his mood, it was distracting in a nervous moment.

"Maybe under the top sheet."

Pulling the top cover back, he dragged it back to the end of the bed and then moved back to me. My body stiffened as his hand pressed to my stomach, sliding up over my ribs. It lifted, moving to the curve of my neck. Leaning in, Alaric took a slow and easy kiss.

The delicate touch scraped over my throat, his lips dragged over mine.

"How far did your mischievous play time extend?"

"Not very far. We were told to avoid sex until we were partnered to avoid getting pregnant. They warned us not to because we could inadvertently have sex with someone that was genetically similar to us."

"They've mapped out the lines?"

I nodded.

"Well, we are not related."

I laughed softly.

"Every single member of my family has been recorded."

"Do you have a lot of family?"

"In a distant kind of way."

Alaric dragged his finger down my sternum, when he reached the material, he popped the first button. As the second button was popped, Alaric shifted his hand over the swell. It was vastly different from the groping that I'd endured earlier. This was gentle and arousing.

His hand was on the move again, undoing the buttons while his lips pressed at the bottom of my sternum. The more buttons that were opened, the more of me that was exposed. Material bunched in his hands, pulling it over my skin.

I gasped when his hand slid over the material, curving around my breast. When I lifted my head, I saw an amused grin, fangs exposed as he traced his tongue over the tip.

Alaric laid beside me, leaning on one arm, the free hand toying with the hard flesh.

"Was it just your friend that you were scandalous with?"

"It's not scandalous." I chided. "We were just learning."

"Uh-huh."

The wicked creature was smiling hard.

"Did you learn with any guys?"

I shook my head.

"It was prohibited unless it was the man that we were assigned to."

"Not even a little play time?" Alaric shifted closer, taking my hand and pressing it to his body. "Not even a little sex-free exploration?"

"There were no boys at the orphanage."

"And after you left?"

"I was too busy enjoying a moment of freedom."

"You've got lots of freedom now. Go lower." He whispered.

Hesitantly, I moved my fingers down the torso, stopping at his stomach.

"You stopped."

"Alaric." I chided.

"Come on, Emme, relax and enjoy it. You only get your first time once and I'm trying to make it easy and fun."

"You are?"

He nodded with a lot of cheekiness. I hated it when he was being adorable.

"Go lower. Explore with me."

Uncertainty gripped me but the heat of the moment was becoming too much for me. Alaric nuzzled at my neck, kissing everywhere between the curve of my shoulder and under my ear. I gulped and delved under the waistband of his bed pants.

Alaric groaned softly with the first touch, my hand smoothed over the skin, wrapping around the shaft. The pants were annoying and, in the way, I lifted up off the bed and shifted them down. Alaric flicked them off, tossing them aside. My nightdress soon followed. I was down to one tiny pair of pants, sitting on the bed with a naked man in front of me.

Dancing my fingers over his thigh, I bit my lip with a smile.

"What now, my beautiful Emmeline?"

I shrugged. Alaric sat up, leaning on one hand, the gripped the curve of my neck. Dragging me to him, Alaric ardently kissed me. Carefully he lowered me to the bed and then pulled back. Moving between my legs, he curled his fingers under the side panels of my pants and began dragging them down.

"Your cheeks are turning pink, Emme. Don't be embarrassed, it's a natural part of life."

My cold hands pressed to my cheeks, feeling the warmth.

"It's a bit hard not to be, I've never been naked in front of a guy before."

"And I am honored."

Lifting my legs, he flicked the pants away and then rested the legs against his chest.

"Are you honored?"

"For you to be my first?" I snapped, perhaps a little too harshly.

My legs were lifted to either side of his body as Alaric moved onto all fours, hovering over me.

"No," He whispered against my lips. "For you to be mine."

"You've never?"

Alaric shook his head, lowering to kiss his way down my body.

"Been busy training for the lead up to and including tomorrow night."

"But surely one or two over the years would have been okay."

I gasped when his lips pressed against my stomach.

"Maybe but a moment of distraction is a moment lost. Like now, I'm forgoing much-needed sleep to have a moment of distraction with you."

"Please, go to sleep if it worries you that much."

Alaric chuckled, pushing my legs open. Before I could say anything or protest, he licked me.

"Oh, good lord." I groaned.

"Come on, you didn't do this with your friend?"

"Just our hands."

"I see."

Taking a teasing kiss on my thigh, Alaric smiled broadly.

"Well then, I think you might just enjoy the next few minutes."

"You're certainly full of yourself."

He hummed a soft laugh and then leaned in, slicking his tongue against me. The wet heat was divine, I groaned and enjoyed the tingle that began to spark through my body. Alaric was right, I would enjoy the next few minutes.

Long lazy circles were taken, warm breath brushed over the sensitive skin, causing me more grief. The tip teased over the flesh, flattening for a languid and slippery scrape through the seam. I groaned, feeling the ecstasy rising.

Alaric took my hands, guiding them to my chest. He hummed a needy growl against the skin as he watched me. Pleasure was taking hold, the more he circled the skin with his tongue, the closer I got. I looked down, seeing him buried face first between my legs. The sight was too much for me, pleasure rocketed through me. I flopped back against the pillow, moaning how good it was and begging him not to stop.

I sighed softly when the orgasm was done, smiling as if I'd never had one before. Alaric kissed a path up my body, making me shiver. I could detect a certain smugness to his mood when he lowered to my body.

"Still think I'm full of myself?"

I nodded with a wide grin.

"Cheeky devil." He whispered before sneaking a chaste kiss. "Ready?"

My smile dissipated, remembering the lesson they'd given on this moment.

"It's going to hurt."

"I've heard that." He murmured, lifting from the bed. "But as luck would have it, I ventured to the shops and found something that might help just a little."

Alaric pulled a tube out of the nightstand drawer. Opening it, he slathered the gel over himself. That was a little hot to watch. Alaric grinned at me.

"What?"

"I was just thinking that is pretty good to watch."

"Really?" He hummed, thinking about it. "Maybe you do need to come to a meeting in the shower then."

I giggled, rolling my eyes. His hand slipped between my legs, putting a lot of the product on me. The cap was flicked shut and the tube tossed onto the bed.

"Relax," He said as he lowered back between my legs. "I'll enter slowly and tell me if you want to stop, okay?"

I nodded, feeling the mood turn serious. It was supposed to be fun and easy going but I was about to experience pain. I was used to it now, today had been filled with a lot of pain. Alaric shifted into place, I could feel the pressure against me. It grew and became intense.

He moved over me entirely, resting his hands next to my shoulders. The entire time, Alaric watched for my reaction, wary of hurting me too much.

"Still with me?"

I nodded again, gripping his arms tight. He stopped and lowered onto his forearms. Our kiss was slow and needful, my hands moved over his shoulders, one continued through the hair on the back of his head.

When we were taught about this time and what our futures would be, the school within the orphanage stated quite clearly that sex was for a purpose. It created life and it was our only concern. Get pregnant, create the next wave of soldiers for the government. They said that love was secondary and if we were lucky, we would find it. But, they warned against it. After fifteen years, the man would be partnered off with someone else. Love was pointless.

But right here, I had something that was different. We weren't controlled by the government, no one could tell us what to do or how many children we should have. Well, aside from the heir, that is.

Alaric lifted back up to his forearms, gently tugging on my bottom lip.

"I'm going to go slow so that you can become accustomed to it. At some point, I'm going to have to pick up the pace so relax and enjoy it. If it hurts too much for you to keep going then say so, I'll go have a meeting in the shower."

"Enough," I said as I laughed. "I'm okay."

"Great because it's killing me to not move."

Slowly he slid out, still watching me. The movements became steady, a regular pace that helped me become accustomed to the odd sensation. It hurt but not as much as what I was told it would. Maybe it had to do with the gel that Alaric put on us.

Warmth pushed over my skin, Alaric kissed my jaw, sucking on the skin playfully. It was a teasing path to my lips, the urgency growing the deep passion, the yearning for more. My breathing became labored, heavy and filled with desperate moans.

"All good?"

I smiled and nodded. It was good, it was much more than just good.

"Faster," I begged breathlessly.

"Really?"

"Yeah, really."

The pace picked up. Going faster might not have been the wisest suggestion in terms of how sore I'd be feeling after this but right now, the sensations were incredible. I was moaning louder now, no longer a whisper it was a soft groan that begged him not to stop. I feared that I'd lose the wonderful feelings that were growing fast if he did.

The frown on Alaric's face was intense, watching him was a mistake. Seeing him enjoying it, seeing the pleasure on his face, it was too much for me. My body writhed with the orgasm, I gripped his body hard as it flowed through me. Alaric groaned, muffled against my neck.

"You are my undoing." He mumbled.

I smiled, wrapping my arms around his neck.

"I was just thinking the same thing."

Alaric lifted his face from my neck, softly kissing me. Carefully he pulled out of me but still remained between my legs. I didn't mind, having him this close was wonderful.

"When Silas said that I had to have a woman beside me, I didn't think that I'd be here, like this. I know you're upset at the list and honestly, I don't blame you but it was only because Silas wanted things to go well tomorrow night. Your role in this is just as important as mine is."

"It's okay, I get that you three make a lot of lists."

"We do not." He cheekily bit back.

"Uh, you do. Tonight, you three made five lists in addition to the two that you already had on the go, the list about what the queen should be like and the one that I was on. How many before my time?" I shrugged. "Dunno but I'll bet there were just as many."

Alaric feigned disgust when he huffed but I could see the sneaky smile on his face. Laying down beside me, I rolled over and snuggled into him. My hand smoothed over his chest, I smiled softly because I knew that even though this wasn't conventional and we weren't exactly the greatest of partnerships, we'd get there because this was more than just convenience.