All day I worry about my upcoming date with Kioko. I already spent all my money on our shopping spree and I'm confident this restaurant isn't going to be cheap. The school doesn't allow us to work part time jobs, though some do. Unfortunately, my parents agree that I should be focusing on my school work and grades. It wouldn't be that big of a deal, except that my allowance probably isn't big enough to cover even if I hadn't already spent this month's.

Fortunately dad gets home from work at a decent hour, but that's just because he brought work home with him. I give him a moment to settle in before I approach, trying to sound casual. "Can I borrow some money?"

Dad doesn't even look up from his laptop. "Getting money is like digging with a needle..." Things must be going well at work. He seems to be in a playful mood.

"I'm serious. I really need some money and I don't have any."

"Spending it is like water soaking into sand."

I can tell he's not taking me seriously. "We can laugh happily with our children, but not our money. Don't you want me to be happy?"

Dad laughs, "Touche," then frowns. "What happened to all the money you were saving?"

"I spent it on clothes and a new haircut when I was out with Kioko-chan."

"I don't know..." Dad shakes his head. I suspect he's looking for an excuse to say no.

Mom pauses while cleaning dishes in the kitchen. "How much do you need?"

"About five-thousand yen."

Dad looks at me for the first time. "Five thousand! What do you need that much money for?"

"I'm supposed to take Kioko-chan out on a date this Sunday."

His disapproving frown changes to surprised understanding. "Oh. Well. That's different."

"We would normally pay for his haircut and clothes," mom suggests, helpfully.

"Good point." After some thought, he shrugs and reaches for his wallet. "Very well." He hands me six thousand yen with a wink. "Be sure to show her a good time."

I don't even know what to think. "Uh, yeah."

* * *

Kioko is nearly twenty minutes late for our date. I loiter near Kita station hoping I didn't somehow miss her as the evening traffic picks up. Hundreds of people pass by, either heading home for dinner, after a day of shopping, or heading out to the clubs for the last free night of fun before the work week begins.

While I wait, my new hair and clothes draw attention from passersby. A couple of university girls smile my way, but don't stop to chat. It feels weird, but I have to give Kioko credit if she could take a guy like me and make me attractive enough for a second glance.

"Michi-kun!" Kioko approaches at a brisk walk, her high heels striking the pavement with confidence. "Sorry I'm so late." She is very fashionably dressed which somehow makes her look more mature. Every male head turns, following her as she passes by them.

I lean against a light pole with my hands in my pocket trying to act like I hadn't been counting the seconds until she appeared. "It's OK."

She stops before me and grins. "I had to try to make myself look good enough for you."

I laugh. "Why would you say that? You're already beautiful." And she is. Not that she has ever been less than beautiful, but with her hair and makeup and new clothes, she looks more like a fashion model than a high school girl. If she were a little taller, she could probably be a professional model. It is, frankly, a little intimidating. A small part of me wishes she were a little less flashy. The rest of me can't believe my luck.

"Now that we've upgraded your look, I don't want to let anyone think I'm not good enough for you. Some girl might try to steal you away." She grabs my arm and hugs it, grinning up at me. "So where are we going?"

I'm not even used to holding hand in public. I cast nervous glances about, anticipating at least a few disapproving looks at the public gesture. One passing old guy looks jealous. A couple of women my mom's age even smile at us. Perhaps the rules really are different for the good looking. Even so, I feel like I'm trapped under some sort of love spotlight. "We have some time before our reservation. I thought we could go take a walk through Showa park."

Kioko looks off toward the park. "Isn't that in the opposite direction from the restaurant."

"I suppose, though it's not far."

She absentmindedly runs her palm along the curve of her hair, brushing it into place though it was already there. "Wouldn't it be better if we avoided getting all tired and messy before our date?"

Strike one, right off the bat. Why didn't I think this through more carefully? "OK. Well, I didn't really have anything else planned."

"No?"

"What would you like to do?"

Kioko's sticks her lower lip out, thinking. She couldn't help being cute if she wanted to. "We could just stroll along the storefronts on the way to the restaurant. I don't care what we do as long as I'm with you." She smiles up at me reassuringly.

While a casual stroll along the sidewalk sounded like a good idea, I feel like salmon swimming upstream as we shuffle and dodge the people flowing past. Kioko often pauses to window shop which gives me time to catch my breath.

We cross a fast moving current of business men rushing to catch the train and take shelter under the awning of a store's entrance. I am monitoring the rushing tide when Kioko, staring through the store window, gives a little gasp. She blushes and shyly looks up at me shyly. I glance over my shoulder at a jewelry store's display of wedding bands. We trade hesitant glances and I look away, heart pounding. It seems the course of my life is accelerating on a current of a different sort, a current of expectations rushing to the edge of the future like a river toward a waterfall, dragging every stray piece of flotsam with it.

The silence between us grows awkward with unasked questions. The need to fill it urges me to say something. I stop myself from asking what styles she likes, realizing I might be going home with a pair if I do. We are near the restaurant and I spy a break in the flow of people as the crossing light turns green.

"Ah! Here's our chance." I grab her hand and dive toward the restaurant. It must be popular. A line of people are already waiting to get in even though we are early.

"I apologize," the headwaiter says when I finally get to the front. "We've had a large party which is taking a little extra time to serve. Please bear with us and I'll find a table shortly."

I returned to Kioko who waits with the other customers.

"What did he say?" She sighs when I repeat his words. "I guess it can't be helped then."

I squeeze in next to her and sit. We try to make small talk but the long wait and growing hunger kills any interest in conversation.

After nearly an hour, Kioko looks back at the head waiter. "I think he's forgotten us. Go ask him how much longer."

"It can't be much longer."

She nods insistently toward the head waiter. "Go ask him."

With a silent inward groan, I approach him. The waiting customers give me puzzled looks as if asking why I think I should cut in line in front of them."

"Excuse me. Excuse me," I have to repeat before the head water notices. "Is it going to be much longer?"

"What?"

"Our table."

"Did you have a reservation?"

"Ametsuchi. Six o'clock. For two."

He looks down at his schedule. "Oh, it's well past six. I'm sure your table was given to someone else."

I try, with mix success, to keep the anger out of my voice. "We've been waiting here since before six."

The he gives me a skeptical look and checks his schedule again. "One moment please." He turns to the customers at the head of the line. "I apologize for the delay." Then he disappears somewhere inside.

I remain with the other diners, whose meals I'm interrupting. I wonder how much they must hate me and how much worse the evening will get. Just as I begin to suspect that he is using me as an excuse to escape the line of irritated customers, the head waiter returns. "I apologize, sir. We've found you a table and they are clearing it now. It'll only be a moment."

I return to Kioko and give her the news. "I think you're right. I think they did forget about us."

We are finally shown in to a small table in the back corner of the restaurant. It's not exactly by the kitchen, but any view of the rest of the restaurant is filtered by a screen of waiters passing by with dishes. Kioko struggles to put a pleasant face on it and compliments the food when it finally arrives. At least it's warm. The food isn't bad, but it's not worth the amount I'm paying.

Kioko doesn't even finish her meal. She samples the food on her plate and drifts to a stop. I fill the silence by bolting mine down. I finish my plate, look up at her, then think to check the time is. "Crap!"

Kioko's eyebrows rise. "What?"

"We've only got a couple of minutes before our movie starts."

"Do you think we can make it?"

"It's not too far away, but if we want to catch it, we'll have to hurry."

It takes longer than I can stand to pay the check, then we are out the door and walking at a near run down the sidewalk. Kioko clacks beside me as fast as she can manage in her high heels. I fight the urge to sprint ahead to buy the tickets, but the idea of leaving her is impossible. We arrive at the ticket office out of breath and sweating. "Two tickets for..." I pause to catch my breath and check the movie listings, "A Young Man's Life."

"That movie has already started," the ticket agent says. "Would you prefer a later showing?"

I check the listings again then turn to Kioko. "The next showing is in nearly two hours. Would you prefer to watch something else?" The other movies are a pair of children's movies, a horror movie and an action flick. I've heard guys will sometimes take girls to a horror film to get their dates to cling to them, but Kioko's expression clearly says she's not interested in the others.

"I don't mind if we've missed some of it," she says.

I turn back to the ticket agent with a shrug. "Two please."

We get our tickets, find the theater and stumble through the dark to find our seats. The movie progresses so slowly, I first think we can't have missed much, but I soon learn that we missed some sort of traumatic event in the male lead's past from which the love interest was helping him recover. I keep trying to figure out what happened, but the characters only make oblique references to it and no one explains anything. The next thing I know the lights come up and people are leaving their seats. "Huh? What?"

Kioko gives me a patient smile. "Have a good rest?"

"Did I fall asleep?" How much worse can this night get?

"You must have been exhausted."

"I'm sorry. I was so excited about our date that I didn't get much sleep last night."

Kioko's smile brightens a bit. "Me too."

We leave the theater. The hour is late and the moonless sky is dark. I can almost feel the time by the dwindling flow of traffic. My mood darkens as well. I silently tally up my long list of failures during our walk back to the station. This was supposed to be a special evening for the two of us, but it has turned into a large collection of disappointments. "I'm sorry."

"Why?"

"I wanted this date to be special, but nothing worked out the way it was supposed to."

Our hands bump against each other and she takes mine. We walk in silence. Her warm hand feels both strange and familiar. Perhaps I'll get used to this someday, but I can't imagine I'll ever take it for granted.

"Want to get some coffee?" she asks as we near a coffee shop.

"Sure."

The coffee shop seems unusually bright as we step inside. The air is thick with the rich smell of roasted coffee beans. Kioko orders a big cup with lots of cream, chocolate and exotic spices on top.

"What can I get you?" the barrista asks me.

I check my wallet and realize I barely have enough to cover Kioko's coffee.

"Ah. Nothing for me, thanks."

Kioko gives me a questioning look. "Are you sure?"

"Yes. I'm more of a tea guy anyway."

"They have tea here."

I waved away her suggestion. "I'm fine. You go ahead."

Kioko gives me a coy look. "Want to share?"

"Sure."

We sit at a small table. Kioko takes a sip and removes the cup's lid to let it cool.

I sit, wanting to say something funny or ironic to ease the sense of failure the evening has become. "I'm sorry," I repeat feeling like an idiot. It's all I can think. "I really had planned for things to go differently."

"Don't beat yourself up. You listened to my feelings and tried to make me happy. That means a lot too."

"If you say so."

She slides her cup toward me. "Would you like a sip?"

I reach for the cup, the cup she had just put her lips on and which still bears the marks of her lipstick. Last year, in junior high, everyone would have made a big deal about it being an indirect kiss. I may have never kissed anyone, but I remind myself that I'm in high school now. I should act more mature. I put my lips where her lips were and take a sip. Like this evening, the coffee is a strong mix of both sweet and bitter, though it's also just shy of scalding in temperature.

Kioko stares thoughtfully out of the dark window, then chuckles. "I must have looked pretty funny trying to run in high heels."

I smile to myself, appreciating her attempt to lighten the mood. "No funnier than that arrogant head waiter trying to apologize without admitting he'd messed up."

Kioko fights a grin as she sips the coffee. "I wonder what the lady at the theater thought of us coming into the movie so late?"

"She probably took one look at me and realized I needed a nap."

Kioko chokes on her laugh. We're still chuckling as we leave the coffee shop, my despair having lightened to a diffuse melancholy. We stroll casually back toward her house, drifting in and out of conversation, or just silently holding hands in the dark. I can probably get used to this, I think.

We stop outside her house. Her face shines in the shadowed light of the corner street lamp. "Give me another chance to do it right?" I ask.

To my surprise, she slips her arms around me and pulls me into the shadows by her front gate. "As many as you want."

Suddenly her face is close and growing closer. I barely have time to take a surprised breath and then her lips are on mine. They are soft, warm and wet, tasting faintly of coffee, cinnamon and sugar. The delicate floral scent of her hair, tangled with the light fragrance of her perfume, drifts up my nose and fills me with an overwhelming sense of her presence. I am drowning in her.

I slide my arms around her to keep from floating away, startled by her tangible soft curves. She sinks into my arms with a comfortable-yet-strange familiarity. It is as if my arms were made to hold her and she was made to be held by them. She rocks her head, her lips gently gliding across mine, our open mouths pulling on each other's.

I can't believe this is happening. How did I come to be here?

All too soon she pulls back, our noses brushing each other's, her breath caressing my face and I can't breathe. My head throbs with the urgent pounding of my heart.

She looks up at me with a hopeful look as if asking, Is this alright? Am I alright? And I hold her tighter. She leans in and whispers in my ear, "That was my first kiss. I wanted you to have it." She doesn't have to tell me how special a 'first kiss' is to a girl.

"Mine too."

We stare for a moment into each other's eyes. This close it is almost too much. She lowers her gaze. "I guess I should go."

I sigh, not want to let her go. "If you must."

She looks up at me. "I'll see you tomorrow at school."

"OK."

She starts to pull away, but I pull her to me and I am kissing her. She melts against me as I hold her tightly, leaning into me as I kiss her insistently. She relaxes, surrendering her weight into my arms and I hold her, kissing her until I am out of breath.

We part with a gasp and she sags against me, her cheek resting against my shoulder. We lean against each other panting for breath as our racing hearts struggle to catch up. Gradually, I grow aware of the chirping crickets and the rush of distant traffic and wonder again about the time.

Kioko straightens and slowly pushes herself back. "I really must go."

I allow her to tear herself away with great reluctance.

"Tomorrow." Her smile is a strange mix of joy and regret, as if she might burst either into laughter or tears at any moment.

"Tomorrow," I echo, unable to even think of anything other than her. My eyes follow her as she retreats to her front door, casts a final glance back over her shoulder and slips inside.

I float in a dreamy haze back to my own house with no idea of how I get there.