Arish's pov:

(Long chapter)

My photographer was really happy with my performance today, i smile natural daw, like i was happy.

Maybe I'm really happy? Maybe I'm finding myself in a peaceful zone.

"Keep up with the positive and happy energy" ngiti saakin ni miss Ingrid making me nod.

Tarantadong Nico yun iba epekto sakin!

Excited akong pumasok sa kotse ko pag tapos ng photoshoot ko. I'm ready to have lunch with Nico.

I drove to the place where nico sent, i looked at the side mirror and noticed that I'm smiling.

Why I'm i smiling? I quickly shook my head, nag park na ako sa place kung saan kami mag l-lunch.

The restaurant of his choice was not as fancy like the restaurant we always go to, but that doesn't matter! Gutom na ako.

"Hey, miss model" bungad niya saakin pag pasok ko, i smiled at him he motioned me to follow him so i did.

He pulled the chair and helped me seat on it, his cologne invaded my mose it's very manly i could smell it.

Dior sauvage elixir.

Ohhh! The smell of all liars, i see. I smirked at him making him confuse.

"What's with the face miss model?" I drank on the glass of water and stared at him admiring his pretty eyes na pag nginitian ako ay mawawala.

"Dior sauvage elixir" he looked so damn impressed with me right now that he smiled so genuine at me medyo namumula ang mukha "The smell of all liars" dugtong ko making him frown.

He smelled himself and shrugged "Come on miss model, my mom gave this to me, I'm not a liar. I just love this scent so much" i shrugged making him laugh.

Dumating na ang pag kain namin kaya kumain na kami ng tahimik, our silence wasn't akward, it was a peaceful one.

After eating nag lakad na kami palabas ng restaurant, it was nice for him to open the door for me.

Bare minimum, but it means a lot for me, every small efforts they do for me counts

"Hmm, YSL Mon Paris Eau de Parfum" gaya gaya to! But he guessed my perfume correctly.

I gave him a seductive look and touched his biceps slowing moving close to his ear "That's correct" i whispered in his, i looked a his face and saw that he turned into a tomato making me smirk at lumabas na.

He insisted to spend the day with me dahil wala siyang patients ngayon "Where are you taking me doc singkit?" He chuckled. Pinaiwan niya na saakin ang sasakyan ko sa restaurant at papakuha niya nalang daw yun sa secretary niya para ipag drive niya nalang daw ako.

He smiled while looking at the driveway "You might think that I'm a weirdo, but i love museums. It's just so peaceful, quiet and fascinating" ngumiti ako sakanya, I didn't know na gusto niya pala yung nga lugar na yun "C'mon, that's not weird! Go on show me" sabi ko sakanya he looked so excited.

"Do you want to play a song?" Tanong niya making me nod, i connected my phone in his car and played

Lover by T.S

Ladies and gentlemen, will you please stand?
With every guitar string scar on my hand
I take this magnetic force of a man to be my lover
My heart's been borrowed and yours has been blue
All's well that ends well to end up with you

He was just vibing while i was singing.

"You sing so good, super talented mo nasayo na ang lahat" sabi niya at kinindatan ako "Kaya crush kita" my heart was beating so fast, napaka vocal niya talaga sa feelings niya.

"Alam ko" mayabang na sabi ko making him laugh

Nung nag stop sign ay binigay ko sakanya ang phone ko "Ikaw naman you choose a song"

Kinuha niya yun at nag tipa ng title ng kanta sa Spotify ko.

Pasilyo - sunkissed lola

Di maikukumpara
Araw-araw kong dala-dala
Paboritong panalangin ko'y
Makasama ka sa pagtanda
Ang hiling sa Diyos na may gawa
Apelyido ko'y maging iyo

Naglakad ka nang dahan-dahan
Sa pasilyo tungo sa 'kin
At hinawakan mo ako't aking 'di napigilang
Maluha nang mayakap na

Ikaw at ikaw
Ikaw at ikaw
Ikaw at ikaw
Ikaw at ikaw

Sabay kaming nakanta, saktong pag tapos ng kanta ay nag park na siya.

Bumaba na kami ng kotse niya at nakita ko kung nasaan kaming parte ng Manila "I want to take you to church first" he smiled and offered his biceps for me to hold on.

Instead of taking me to his bedroom, he took me to church. Very impressive of him.

San Vicente de Paul Parish

This is the first time a guy took me to church, he's amazing me right now. Pag pasok namin ay umupo kami sa bandang likod.

He closed his eyes and started praying. I look at the altar and also closed my eyes to pray

Lord,

forgive me for all of my sins, thank you for all the love and blessings that you're giving me everyday, thank you for helping me reach my dreams, thank you for teaching me a lesson so i can love myself more.

Lord, i pray for my peace of mind, i pray that the path I'm walking on is right if not i pray that you'll guide me to the right direction. Lord guide Dwayne he's facing a big challenge in his life right now, i pray that you'll give him strength to concur the challenges he's facing right now. I also pray for his baby, Rin, i pray that he feels better so his dad can take him home and grow as a healthy, handsome, gentleman.

I also pray that you'll guide Ineish, Tine and Ashley on their journey and Guide Kean, Gab, and Jay on their decision makings in life.

Lord, if i ever find love again, i pray that he's someone you sent, not someone I'm forcing myself to.

I pray that he'll marry me and make me understand the real meaning of love.

In Jesus name i pray Amen.

When i opened my eyes i saw Nico admiring me "You seem really serious with your prayers, miss model" ngumiti ako at inayos ang buhok na kanina pa nalipad lipad.

Pumikit siya ulit at nag dasal, akala ko ba tapos na siya? Isang minuto ang lumipas at dumilat na siya at tumingin siya saakin at nginitian ako "I prayed that your prayers come true" I can't help smiling, this man prayed again para ipag dasal na mangyari ang pinag dadasal ko, that's so genuine of him.

I was just looking at him admiring his features nang mapansin ko ang buhok niya. His hair cut is like Levi Ackerman's hair kaya kanina pa natutusok ng buhok niya yung mata niya.

I couldn't take it anymore, I combed my fingers in his soft hair, pushing it back a little. He smiled and turned red.

After praying ay dinala na niya ako sa national museum. It was so beautiful inside, this is perfect for my Instagram.

Nilabas ko ang phone ko at nag picture ng scenery sa loob. Lumingon ako kay Nico at nakitang pinipicturan niya ako habang nag ppicture ako.

Ngumiti while shrugging his shoulder "You're not a model for nothing" i chuckled ang kulit talaga niya.
While walking around the museum, he kept taking pictures of me.

"Kanina ka pa singkit, patingin nga kung maganda yan?" Inagaw ko ang phone, i was surprised dahil maganda siya kumuha ng picture.

It's just a candid photo, i love how he knows the right timing on when to take the photo.

"Don't worry you look beautiful" i rolled my eyes dahil ayokong malaman niya na kinikilig ako.

"Air drop mo nga yan, p-post ko sa ig" Kinuha niya ang phone ko at nag air drop na ng mga pictures ko.

Nakanigiti akong nag titingin ng pictures ko ng mag salita siya "Follow back mo naman ako miss model" i laughed at kinuha ang phone niya.

Nicolai.lee

His name is nice lalo na yung middle name niya "Nicolai Monterey Lee"

"Yes, ma'am" He has lots of followers actually. 68k followers is not bad, he's quite famous dahil sa family status niya.

Agad ko na siyang finollow back, nagulat nalang ako at kinikilig siya at pinakita niya pa talaga saakin ng takpan niya ng dalawang kamay niya ang mukha niya at parang uod na nangingisay "Ano ba singkit maliit na bagay!"

Natitigil kami paminsan minsan pag may mag papapicture saakin, super bait niya sa part na mag kukusa siyang kunin ang phone ng fan at siya na mag pipicture saamin.

"Boyfriend mo siya miss arish?" Tanong ng isang fan pag tapos namin mag picture. Tinignan ko si Nico na nag p-picture ng scenery "Sa susunod ko na sasagutin pag sure na" kindat ko sakanya at nag paalam na.

Pag tapos namin mag ikot ikot dun ay kumain kami ng kwek kwek at fish ball, akala ko maarte siya pero grabe siya kumain ng kwekwek.

Habang nakain kami ng kwekwek at fishball nag lakad lakad kami sa Luneta park.

Napatigil ako ng makita ang lobong nailaw na may rose sa loob, tinuro ko yun sakanya "Ang cute nailaw!" sabi ko at sumubo ulit sa kwekwek ko.

Ngumit siya saakin at nilapitan ang matandang nag titinda. Nagulat nalang ako nang bumili siya.

I was standing there watching him care for the old man, binigyan niya yun ng 1k at kinuha na ang lobong nailaw at di na kinuha pa ang sukli.

Tumakbo siya pabalik saakin hawak hawak ang lobong nailaw, this man is making me believe that love actually exists. I was just admiring him dahil meron siyang pag kukusa, gentleman siya, may emotional intelligence siya, and specially walang araw na di niya sinabi na gusto niya ako.

"For you miss model" kinuha ko yun at nag tatalon sa saya! Ang cute nailaw ilaw! May buttons pa siya yung dim lang ba na light or flicker.

Napatigil ako nung makita kong pinapanood niya lang ako habang naka ngiti, agad naman akong nahiya dahil lumabas ang childish side ko "Sorry, this made me so happy"

He shook his head at hinila ako palapit sakanya habang nag lalakad "It's ok, I'm happy that i made you happy"

To be honest he's making me feel things i haven't felt before.

There's no butterflies in my stomach, there's no worry, there's no expectations, it's something peaceful.

This might have been the best date of my life.

I was so surprised dahil madaming nag post sa social media ng pictures namin ni Nico.

It's been three days since our date, For heaven sake!

Hindi ako galit, pero i was a bit disappointed dahil madami nang rumors at false accusations ang nangyari.

Tinanong ko si Nico kung ok lang ba sakanya ang nangyayari sa socmed ngayon, he said said he's really ok with it. Sabihin na ng mga tao ang gusto nilang sabihin dahil alam namin ang totoo.

My phone rang revealing Dwayne's name.

"Hey, Is everything ok?"

{ Ah nakauwi na si Rin rin, do you want to see him? }

"Really!? Thank goodness he's home! I'll go there in a bit"

Buti naman at ok na si Rin, i prayed for him.

nicolai.lee

Hey miss model!

Rin is discharged yesterday :))

me:

Ik thank you Lord.

nicolai.lee

Remind dwayne to change his clothes everytime his back sweats

Also tell Dwayne na it's ok for Rin to cry for one minute or so, pampatibay ng baga niya :)

Bawal siya mababad sa pawis, his lungs is ok now, but it's still weak.

I can't help but to admire him even more, he's very dedicated when it comes to these little human.

me:

Noted, doc singkit :))

nicolai.lee

Ok, talk to you later.

After that date ganito na kami lagi, we always talk to each other.

Dwayne bought a big house while Rin was still in the hospital dahil hindi daw maganda sa baby ang condo environment niya.

Nag text na ako sakanya na papunta na ako para pag buksan niya ako ng gate.

His house was just twenty minutes away from my condo. Pag baba ko ng kotse nakita ko na agad ang mansyon niya.

Very elegant.

Palakad palang ako sa may pinto ay narinig ko na agad ang iyak ni Rin "Hey" bati ko pag bukas niya ng pinto, he looks like a mess pero pogi pa din naman.

"Can you watch him for a bit, maliligo lang ako" i chuckled and went inside, inferness ang ganda ng interior design niya.

Sinundan ko siya paakyat sa kwarto ni Rin. Agad naman ako nag alcohol para mabuhat ko na si Rin.

"Hey baby" i smiled when i get to smell his precious baby scent.

Umupo ako sa rocking chair niya as I placed him in my chest while i rub his back dahil naiyak pa din siya.

"It's ok baby, don't cry" Hinahaplos ko lang ang likod niya habang nag ro-rock kami sa chair.

Habang yakap yakap ko siya hindi maalis sa isip ko ang mga what if. What if anak namin to Dwayne? What if di niya minahal first love niya? I always dream to be a mom pero hindi sa ganitong paaran, but alam ko na mamahalin ko si Rin ng totoo.

Paparamdam ko sakanya na meron siyang Mom kahit na iniwan siya ng totoo niyang nanay.

Thank goodness he stopped crying dahil na comfort siya sa haplos ko sa likod niya.

My eyes got a little heavy dahil sa lamig na nararamdaman ko kaya naman nakatulog din ako while Rin is still in my chest.

When i opened my eyes ganun pa din ang posisyon namin, tulog na tulog pa din si Rin.

Nakita ko naman si Dwayne na nag l-laptop sa may side table, I can't help but to imagine na this our life after graduating and achieving our dreams, settling down having a little one, but no. Destiny has other plans for us.

We had to face our own challenges separately, we have to have separate plan, we have to have a separate future, Because we're not meant to stay with each other as lovers.

Napansin niya ata ang tingin ko kaya napalingon din siya saakin "Sorry naka tulog ako" bulong ko sakanya at hinaplos and likod ni Rin.

"Hindi, ok lang. First time lang ni Rin natulog ng tuloy tuloy" ngiti niya saamin habang pinapanood ako kung paano ko tapikin si Rin ng kaunti.

Naawa ako kay Rin so i will make sure na hindi niya mararamdaman na wala siyang ina sa tabi dahil nandito ako kami nila ash, ineish at tine para sakanya.

Rin is so lucky dahil i could see that Dwayne is really trying to be the best dad, kahit nahihirapan siya dahil wala siyang katuwang lagi.

Nagulat nalang ako dahil nung nasa ospital pa si Rin he quit smoking at naka focus nalang kay Rin. Kahit naka break ang hectic ay napaka ingay pa din ng pangalan nila online.

Madaming nag a-apply maging nanay ni Rin sa fan base ni Dwayne. Kaso wala talaga siyang pake dahil kay Rin lang ang focus niya.

He's becoming the best version for Rin, he wants to set a good example for Rin, kaya sinimulan niya sa sarili niya. I'd say this version of him is my favorite.

"Mag titimpla lang ako ng gatas niya, he usually wakes up around four" i nodded and rubbed the baby's back dahil lumilikot na siya.

Pag balik ni Dwayne sakto umiyak na si Rin indicating that he's hungry, kinuha ko ang bote ng gatas niya at binigay na yun sakanya.

He's so cute while he chugs his milk, i wonder what his dream is? I bet he dreamed of milk land or some sort kaya nagutom siya.

"You'll be a great mom" biglang sabi ni dwayne, i smiled and fixed the bottle tilting it dahil paubos na niya.

"I know" sabi ko at inabot ko na sakanya ang empty bottle, agad naman akong tumayo at nilagay siya sa may leeg ko at tinapik tapik ang likod para maka burp na siya.

My phone suddenly rang "Dwayne paabot nga ako" pasuyo ko, he stood up from the chair and took my phone from the desk at lumapit para maabot yun saakin.

"It's Nico?" Nag tatakang sabi niya kaya kinuha ko na agad yun.

[ Hey miss model! How's Rin? ] I smiled when i heard his cheery voice.

"He's currently burping in my arms, if you're going to ask kung may pawis siya, well wala." He chuckled in the other line.

[ Ok that's nice, if you're not busy tomorrow let's grab dinner together ]

Ngumiti ako at inayos ang pag kaka buhat kay Rin "Of course, see you" sabi ko at binulsa na ang cellphone ko.

He was just staring at me while his amrs are crossed together "You two have a thing going on?" Curious na tanong ni Dwayne.

I chuckled at kiniss ng kiniss ang matabang pisnge ni Rin "Hmm, di ko pa sure" he smiled sadly at nilapitan kami ni Rin.

Tinignan niya ako sa mata "You deserve happiness, Arish" niyakap niya ako habang nasa gitna namin si Rin.

"I won't be selfish, kung saan ka masaya dun ako, i love you so much and I can't see you suffer because of me" He smiled sadly as he tucked a piece of my hair behind my ear.

"It's my fault why I can't have you anymore, kung ip-pursue kita ulit that will be selfish of me. You've been through a lot because of your love for me, so the least i can do is support you with your happiness" he looked down and held my hand.

"I love you so much, Arish. You're my greatest lost love" Sabi niya at hinalikan ang noo ko, i could see his bloodshot eyes.

"I'll be loving you from a far Rish, I'll always be here for you" I stretch my other arm para yakapin din siya, hindi iyakin si Dwayne and seeing him crying like a baby Infront of me hurt me too.

He looked at me with dripping tears down his cheek kaya pinunasan ko yun "Please in our next life, I'll do my very best para ako naman. I will look for you in the next life, so please choose me when i find you" I can't help but to cry dahil sa pinag sasabi niya.

Hindi lang ako ang nasasaktan, alam kong nasasaktan din siya. Pareho lang kaming nasasaktan, pareho lang kaming nag kakasakitan kaya tama ang desisyon namin na hanggang dito nalang talaga kami.

Maybe in our next life we wouldn't end up like this, we would end up as a happy, healthy family that would built a peaceful home for our kids.

Not in this life though, we're not meant to be together in this life time.

We finally had the Courage to let each other go peacefully.

Next chapter is the Epilogue :))