I was underwater, my chest tight and lungs burning. My eyes were open but the water didn't sting, he was staring at me, face paler then anyone I've ever seen, eyes emotionless and cold, mouth curved into a frown set with stone. I needed air, I tugged my wrists and faintly hear the metal that bound me to this prison, the burning was getting worse and I just wanted to inhale without the fear of dying, the light was dimming and my eyes were getting heavy. It was at that moment I knew I wasn't getting out of here with my body, but rather my soul. He still continued to watch me drown, all dry and out of the water, the man that put me here, he always puts me here and watches me fight the chains. But today was different because I wasn't thrashing and pulling, I knew I wasn't getting out, this is where I finally gave in. As my eyes started to close on their own. His skin cracked as if he was a statue, I watched as long as I could before my eye fully shut, and my lungs filled with water.

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I jolted awake and sat up fast enough to make the headache I had worse, I grabbed my throat inhaling deeply. My lungs actually burned and my chest felt tight, I don't know why I still wake up like this, I have the same dream every night, ever since I was five and that accident happened I've had the same dream. They were way way worse when I was younger but now it's just the man who's been haunting me since that day staring as I died. That man was the psycho captain that crashed the ship everyone I've loved and cared for was on, I didn't go because I get seasick but I had seen him staring at me from the ship while everyone boarded, looking away only when it was time to go. I was staying with my preschool teacher and also an extremely close friend of my mother's at the time and still am since the family I have left aren't people I want to be around.

I hate that I have to go to school, I can barely focus and get in trouble for things when I wasn't even near the person who actually did it. It sucks, but Nancy would never let me skip school if I don't have a valid reason. I crawl out of bed and take a shower then get dressed in my usual baggy outfit, I go downstairs and see there's a plate on the dining table, usually Nancy doesn't have time to cook but I guess she didn't have to go to work at her usual hour. I sit down and eat while double checking my homework and I hadn't forgotten anything then put my plate in the sink when I was done.

Going outside the wind hit me in the face hard enough to shove air up my nose and I coughed, it was a sunny day with a not very light breeze but I appreciate it since its rarely ever this way in this small town. Not completely ready but have to anyway I make my way to school to start the day.

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After school cuz school is boring and I don't wanna write about it.

I sigh and lean on my locker exhausted ready to sleep, all I had to do was wait until Jordan leaves. Jordan is my crush and I don't want him seeing me when I look like I've been up all night and didn't get a wink of sleep today, because that's what I looked like right now and I don't like it, at all. Among the many footsteps I hear I can point out Jordan's, not because I stalk him or anything I'm not that kind of person, but because I'm so used to waiting for him to leave first and I have to know when he's near in order to do that. Today his footsteps didn't go straight to the door as I expected them to, no they were headed towards me, I panicked on the inside as Jordan got closer. When I could see him in the crowd of people trying to get home to play video games or shove their tongue down their lover's throat I immediately looked down in hopes that it was just my imagination, but the sound of a hand pressing on the locker next to mine and the smell of Jordan's cologne said otherwise.

"Hey, why are you always just standing there?" He asked and I had to restrain myself painfully not to melt at the sound of his voice.

"I-I don't like..... Crowds, they make me feel trapped" Technically that wasn't a lie, I do get anxiety from crowds.

"Really? Do you want me to stay until the crowd is gone?"

I tightly held the strap of my bag in order not to blush "y-you don't have to do that, I'm f-fine"

He grabbed the back of my neck and made me look at him, I couldn't help but blush this time "your face is red and you're stuttering, are you feeling okay"

I looked to the side to avoid staring at his face and bit my lower lip, "don't do that, look at me"

I wanted to crawl in my locker and hide until he goes away but I know that's not going to happen so I forced myself to look at him "why do you always do this when I'm near you?....."

He sounded hurt and I felt guilty, if I wasn't a closeted gay I would've just told him then and there that I liked him so I don't have to feel guilty anymore but I want to wait until I'm out to the school so I don't have to hide if I ever get a boyfriend, it wouldn't be fair. "I-... S-sorry..... "

I clutched the strap tighter, my knuckles turning white and looked at the ground, Jordan sighed and let go of my neck "are you sure you don't need me to stay?"

I chewed on my lip then look at him again, I didn't want to reject him since I already hurt his feelings, I'll just have to deal with the pounding of my heart and the butterflies raging in my stomach "you can stay... Only if you want to..."

Jordan suddenly hugged me and I tensed on reflex, but slowly relaxed and hugged him back, it seems he's had a rough day because he usually doesn't do this. We stayed like that until the halls were empty and we were the only students left to leave, I tapped his back and he looked at me "hm?"

"We should... Probably go now...." I blushed and looked away.

He chuckled, making my heart skip about six beats, and let go of me ruffling my hair "yeah, we should. Do you want a ride?"

I looked at him shocked "in your car?"

"Yeah... I don't have a bike"

"But, you don't even let your friends get in it" I pointed out.

"Because they are the messiest people on earth and I don't want them dirtying up my car," He said like it was obvious.

I knew his friends were messy but jeez, to earn that title you have to be like some sort of mess magnet. "O-oh..."

"So, do you want the ride?"

I thought for a bit, I didn't like walking when it was getting dark and my house is a pretty long distance away, but at the same time, I don't want to have a heart attack because it was beating too hard. "Yeah... I'll ride with you"

Jordan smiles and grabbed my wrist, pulling me out of the school and to his car.

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when he gets home

I laughed after Jordan fell, he tripped on his own pants and luckily hit the bed and not the floor, but his neck still hurt slightly, "don't laugh at my pain" He playfully huffed.

"Maybe you should wear pants that fit, a belt isn't the only thing you need to make sure they don't pool at your feet" I snorted and covered my mouth.

"You have no room to talk, your clothes don't exactly cling to you either" He pouted more.

I rolled my eyes playfully "yeah, but I know how to not trip on them"

He laid on the floor and stared me in the eyes "can you kiss it better?" He was being serious.

I felt my whole face turn red, swallowing loudly I got off my bed and sat next to Jordan, bending over I lightly kissed his throat and felt him shiver, maybe I shouldn't have kissed him like that..... I quickly stood up and went back on my bed, when I looked at Jordan he had his eyes closed. He shivered again before opening them and I quickly looked away, why did he react like that? Jeez, he's so weird... But I love him anyway... "Hey, Parker......" He mumbled.

"Yeah?"

"Can I spend the night? I don't want to go home...."

I looked at him both shocked and worried, he only asks to stay here when his dad is at his house, Jordan's dad is like the opposite of Jordan which I hate but can't do anything about "yeah.....You can stay"

He smiled then stretched, yawning. "Thank you"

I watched him as he closed his eyes and just sat there, he looked so peaceful and calm, I loved it when he was like that because then all the layers of his walls and facade come down and I get to see him, I got out of bed and went to go see if Nancy needed any help with dinner

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Sleepytime! This is the last time skip promise

I was lying in bed curled up, staring at Jordan's chest waiting to fall asleep. We couldn't find the freaking air mattress and I refused to let him sleep on the floor so tonight we're sleeping together, I've wanted this for a long time and it isn't how I thought it would feel. I'm calm and relaxed instead of tensed and blushing so much I'm light-headed. I couldn't tell if he was asleep or awake but he suddenly wrapped his arms around me and I closed my eyes smiling, for the first time since that horrible day, I didn't have the nightmare.

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Jordan's POV cuz I can.

I watched Parker sleep peacefully, not in a creepy way I was just admiring him, this was actually the only time I've seen him sleep relaxed, I never know what he dreams of because I feel like it's none of my business. I gently as to not wake him up brush his hair out his face and behind his adorable ear, he truly is beautiful, way more beautiful than the most beautiful girl in school. Many would disagree but they can kiss my 'I don't give a fuck' ring on my middle finger, maybe it's just because my heart longs for him that I feel this way but I just know it's true.

Parker whined and curled up more when I touched him again to move more hair out his gorgeous face and I had to bite my tongue in order not to chuckle, he relaxed again and I stared at his lips. They were full and had the faintest pink tint, I loved how they turned cherry red when he was embarrassed and how they looked when he bit them, it made me just want to cover them with mine but I kept my distance. I sighed through my nose and held him closer, I didn't mean to wrap my arms around him, I wasn't thinking but when I saw he had passed out I decided to keep them there. I started to get tired but didn't want to sleep, not yet, Parker shifted a bit before loosely wrapping his arms around my neck and burying his face into my chest.

With my heart beating so hard he's going to be the death of me, but I won't mind, as long as I get to kiss him first.

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The end, still sucks tho