Ella

El. He called me El. I haven't been called that, for what seems like centuries, and I never had imagined that he would call me that, among all people. For some reason, it makes me feel a bit better, and I wipe away the tears that I shed, embarrassed once again for breaking down.

"Ducke," he begins as he breaks the silence. "He was my brother, which I'm sure you probably knew?" I nod slightly, indicating for him to go on. "Well, I should have protected him too. He was older then me, but I still feel responsible. The thing I'm trying to say, is that I'm not. He was of a certain age where he knew what was going on, and how to take care of himself. I can't beat myself up for that, Ella, and neither should you. Your brother, despite him being younger, was old enough to take care of himself. It's just how it hit your planet, it has nothing to do with you." I want to tell him that he doesn't know this, that maybe I could have protected him, saved him, but I remain quiet. I don't want to talk about my brother anymore, I don't know how much I can handle.

He lets out a long sigh when he notices that I'm not going to reply to him. "Trust me," he almost begs. "You can't worry about this--"

"Stop," I snap, my voice on edge and still slightly shaky from crying. "I don't want to hear more. I know you're only trying to help, and thanks, but I can't listen to it. I can't listen, because you don't really know. You don't really know that I couldn't have saved him, now, do you? No, and it makes me only feel worse when you assume that you know that I couldn't. You don't know that, so don't say it."

"You're right, I don't know that, but why would I believe that you could have done something, when I realize that maybe I could have done something for my brother? Believing that there was a chance makes it hard on me too, I need to keep our minds positive, despite how harsh it may be."

"So you're only saying this to ease your own conscious? That makes me feel 100% better." I'm not upset with him, I'm just not in the best mood. I should have known that there was something in it for him, when he acted like he cared. He's a freaking Norovian, he can't bloody care.

"Stop, okay? Just stop. You're picking a fight and I'm not having it. I'm trying to keep you strong, to keep myself strong, and you're taking it the wrong way. You're always taking it the wrong way. I try to help you, and you throw it in my face, I don't even know why I continue to help you, because it does nothing but backfire. You're the most selfish human being that I have ever met, and I'm done with you." Everything inside me washes away as his yellow eyes stare into my brown ones, and I can feel the anger replace my sadness.

"Oh, you're done with me? How exactly do you mean that you're done with me? I am so curious to hear your explanation, do tell, I beg thee." I squint my nose dramatically, just to annoy him.

"I'm done with trying!" He half yells as he throws his hands in the air. "I try to keep the peace and help you with saying stupid stuff that I would never even tell another Norovian, but yet it doesn't matter. It never will matter. You hate my guts and that's how it's always going to be, because you're never going to see past that. You're never going to see past the facade that despite we're different from your kind, we aren't actually that different. Maybe we care about each other more, are there for each other more, and all that, but we aren't that different. And you hate that, you hate that we aren't green slimy characters with large bulging eyeballs that speak with one another telepathically. I'm proud of who I am. I'm proud of my kind, but then I watched them die right before my eyes, while making the trip here. You didn't watch your planet explode, all that has happened with you is that your parents and brother died. Oh and your friend. Wow, Ella! Let's all cry about how bad you have it. You're not constantly picked apart are you? People trying to tamper with your brain? Held up for the longest time until we were proven that we weren't trying to take over your planet. I wouldn't want to take over this planet if it was the last planet in the universe. Nothing on here even comes close to the beauty of North. And I'm the selfish only because you give me the strength to continue? That's the dumbest thing I've ever heard. After this morning I thought--I thought--I thought we might be able to be friends. Do you understand how much simpler it'd be if we were? We wouldn't waste energy and time arguing, we would get along and laugh and probably have better health if we didn't have all this anger inside, but no. I should have known that once you're a bratty human that went through some tragedy, you'll always remain a bratty human." I can't even look at him. Despite how much I want to spit in his eyes and punch him a good plenty time, I can't. I almost feel like he's right, and that hurts more than anything he's even said.

"I hate you," I sob, meaning it with everything that's left of me. We could never be friends, there's too much baggage between us.

"Oh look, princess is crying again. Go cry to mommy!" He whines, before pretending to wipe his eyes. "Oh, wait," he smirks, and I lose it.

I turn to him and punch him with everything I have, not even caring about the pain cracking in my knuckles. I keep hitting him over and over again, until we both fall in the sandy ground. I still don't stop, not when I see red from my hand, nor green from his face, I continue to punch him. He finally catches my wrists, and looks me in the eyes. "Stop," he begs, before letting my hands go, and I just cry. I don't even get off of him, my legs are on either sides of his waist, and I don't even care. I let out one huge scream, before slapping him square in the chest, causing him to let out a moan of pain.

I can't believe what he told me. I can't believe he would even have the guts to say something like that, and it makes me cry even harder. I don't care that he thinks I'm a baby, I don't care that he thinks we could be friends, I don't care that he thinks I'm the most selfish human he's ever met. I don't care. I don't care, because I don't care about him. That was the lowest thing he could have ever said to me, and I will never, ever forgive him for that.

My hand throbs, and I wonder if I broke something as I try to examine it through my cloudy tears. I can barely see, and it irritates me even more.

I then feel his hand, holding mine and looking at it. I want to pull away, but I'm afraid that if I do, he'll yank it or something, and it'll be even more worse. "No," I croak. "No."

"Yes," he contradicts me, his voice shaky. "You need to stop busting up your hands," he half laughs, and I don't find it amusing.

"You need to stop being so ignorant," I cry, the tears still flowing down my face. "What you said--" I begin, before sniffling. "Was the worst thing you could have ever said. That was low for you, I never even thought you would say something like that." I try to stop crying, but it's useless. I've been through a lot of crap these past days, and if I want to cry, I think I have that stupid right.

"I know, I said it because I was mad. I'm sorry, I am. I deserve everything you've given me, plus more." I can at least see now, and I take my hand from his, holding mine close as I try to forget the pain.

"I don't forgive you," I whisper, realizing that I sound like a child. "I will never forgive you. This is why we can't be friends. We don't understand one another. When I ask you to stop you keep going, when I get upset you lose it and say such mean things. I hate you, Dean, and I have that right after everything you've said. I never want to be your friend, I never want anything to do with you. When we find more people, I never want to see you again. You'r a horrible being, you would make your species ashamed to even call you one of them." My come backs aren't even near as bad as his were, but I don't have enough energy to think of meaner things to say.

I begin to climb off of him, not wanting to be in contact with him any longer. I wipe my eyes with my good hand, and begin to walk the direction we were going. I will survive, but I don't want to survive with him near me.

"Wait," he mutters, and I can hear him behind me, trying to catch up. "I didn't--" he stops midway, and lets out a deep breath. "Never mind," he whispers to himself, before pulling the backpack around his chest, and taking out the water inside. His face is all cut up, bruised, and I can see the green blood seeping from a couple of wounds. I shouldn't cause more pain upon us than what we already have to deal with, but I couldn't help myself. No one deserves to be talked to in a way he talked to me, no matter who they are. I would have never teased him about his mommy issues, and I hate him. That's just low, and I'll never ever forgive him for that.

I can see the worry in his face as he scans the contents in the bag. "We need to find a town soon, I don't know how much longer these supplies will last." He takes a drink of the water, and hands it over to me. I don't want to drink, but I'm not causing any more drama.

Taking the bottle from him, I take a sip, before handing it back over. I don't say anything, for there's nothing to even say. I hope he doesn't try either, for he's the last thing on this planet that I want to have a conversation with.

I swallow the lump in my throat, and try to think of different things. I finally got myself to stop crying, now I just need to continue that. I am strong, I will show my strength, and I will let no one come in the way of that.