:)

It was at this point that I realised I'd been spelling sculk (turns out it's with a 'c') wrong the whole book, 

I don't want to change it because effort, and because I like seeing comments on the lines they're based on and changing the line will just put them at the bottom.

From now on it will be different (if I remember)

'What's up with them?' Vex grumbles as we leave earshot, arriving back downstairs.

'I don't know.' I reply. 'They're boring and sensitive. It's not even that fun to annoy them.'

'That was pretty fun though.'

'True. Them shouting is the exception.'

'Hey Badtimes! Would you like to grab that potion over there? It has a 50% chance of setting this one on fire when I combine them!' Pix calls as we reach the bottom. I chuck it over, just as Vex replies.

'Hey nerd, would you like to stick that potion up your a**? It has a 50% chance of making you shut up,'

'Thank you, Badtimes.' Pix sighs, even as I start laughing. I missed Vex. As fun as the hermits sometimes are, I missed being rude and setting stuff on fire with him.  'Now this, as far as I know.' Pix holds out the combined potion, which did not set on fire and is now bubbling dramatically. 'Will attack the sculk when thrown. But at the same time, since the potions used to make it are completely harmless, it will do nothing to the player. I hope. I can't test it.'

'I can.' Vex grabs for the potion. Pix holds it out the way.

'This is the only one I have!'

'Then make another you f***ing moron!' Badtimes, grab it from him and yeet it at Scar when he appears. I smirk at Vex's silent command, running forwards to swipe it up. Pix continues holding it out the way.

'Badtimes, I know you're better than this. Stop messing around!' By this point, he's standing on the desk, holding the potion above his head.

'But I've missed this! And we've got time for you to make more, surely. And you need more than one anyway to...'

'SCAR! HELP!'

I turn as Scar appears.

'Badtimes, Vex, stop.'

'Why would I stop?' Vex questions

'Fine. EX! YOUR CHILDREN ARE MESSING AROUND AGAIN!' 

The door bursts open. Vex falls to attention. I know he's slightly scared of EX.

'Right, both of you, go. Stop messing around. Pix is working. Or I drag you out of here.'

'Sorry El.' Vex mutters, slipping away. I follow.

'Oh, and Badtimes? I think Mumbo wanted to see you.'

'Mumbo? The weird moustache one who acts like a malfunctioning robot?'

'Uhh... yes. He's outside.' 

'Alright.'

I leave the building to where a lot of the herm-s**ts are fighting or learning how to heal people, or being taught about sculk. And among them is Mumbo, holding a sword.

'BadTimesWithScar! Hello!' He yells. I walk over, telling Vex I'll be joining him at the arson area soon. 

'Just Badtimes. What is it?'

'I... want to know how to fight.'

I don't reply. 

'And... I thought... hey, Badtimes looks pretty strong, maybe he can teach me. So...'

'Alright. Show me what you've got. But I'll only stay 5 minutes. I've got stuff to set on fire and best friends to catch up with.'

5 minutes quickly turns into 15 as I realise how bad at fighting Mumbo is. And then 20 as I watch him fighting Welsknight, who I know from Helsmitcraft (he sometimes stops us plotting to take down Herm-s***craft). Wels wins, but Mumbo is better at fighting already. And it's as they prepare for another fight that Scar runs over, saying only 4 words.

'Get ready. It's time.'

The flight over to Decked Out is more tense than I expected. This is it. We're fighting the sculk.

Vex lands as I do outside, dressed perfectly as Cub when he was Sculky. The plan is for him to drag me (dressed as Scar) in as a prisoner and then lure everyone to the surface where the hermits will be waiting to kick their butts (I knew that bit would come eventually). And if it fails, it was Scar's idea anyway so no one will blame me.

'Ready?' Vex asks. 

'Always. Let's do this.'

Vex accepted quickly when I said our job was to pretend to be our 'good' sides and lie to Xisuma. He leads the way, grabbing some skulk from the ground and tying up my wrists as I go. He's never minded Sculk, but wants to see some good old fashioned butt-kickery.

Deeper into the dungeon we go, down through the dark, into icy caves which are more skulk than ice. He navigates the way from Pix's map, all the way to a giant room where Xisuma sits, as though expecting us.

'Cub?'

'I brought you a prisoner as an apology. GoodtimeswithScar himself.'

'You have done well... Grian?'

The winged b**** approaches me, holding me back as Vex walks towards Xisuma. 

'The other hermits are planning an ambush. They're at the surface now, but they'll come down here and kill you... you should attack them first.' He lies. Xisuma nods. 

'That would be a good idea.'

He shoves Vex to the ground. 

'If you were actually Cub.'

I yell as sculk pins him. A scream as he tries to escape. But he can't. It's failed. Everything's failed.

'They're waiting at the surface aren't they? We go up there and... what? They kill us?'

No reply.

'Either of you can answer.' His gaze turns to me. I try to fight free of Grian, but I can't. 'I don't mind who.'

'They stop you being sculky.' Vex mumbles. Xisuma laughs a laugh I wouldn't even expect of Hels or 5. 

'Lead us to them.' Tango appears, dragging Vex to his feet. Next to him is who must be Zedaph but is covered in so much sculk I can't even tell. 'Pearl, take the rear. If they want a fight, we'll let them fight. And we'll let them die.'

I'm forced along after. There's nothing I can do. There is absolutely nothing I can do. My attention stays fixed on Vex as we're made to walk towards the surface.

'Oh, and Badtimes? Yes, I can tell you're not Scar. Badtimes, if you or your friend here try to stop us, we're going to kill him... what's your name?'

'Vex.'

'We're going to kill Vex.'

'You wouldn't dare, motherf***er.'

The sculk holding him back tighten and, for once in my life, I regret swearing. 

'I would.'

By this point, we're out the dungeon and in the area beyond. The sun shines bright outside.

'We wait until night. Pearl, build us an army like you made Tilly. Tango, Zedaph, you can let the prisoner go. I will handle him for now. Grian, make sure Badtimes can't escape.'

I'm forced down, hands tied behind my back with sculk, waiting for the longest night of my life to pass. Pearl creates a whole lot more feral sculk puppies to join the main sculk b****. Xisuma stands, watching the entrance. All that runs through my head are plans to kill him that won't work. I can't move, stand, do anything to stop him. All I can do is watch as the sun sets, and Xisuma speaks again.

'It's time.'

He drags Vex along. Too late, I notice the sculk sword against his neck. I'm pulled after by Grian, out of the base and into the dark of outside. 

'I know you're here, hiding.' He calls before anyone tries to ambush 'This what you get when you try to trick us.'

Xisuma slashes.

Vex collapses.

Dead.

:)

Sculky fun

That looks so wrong...