I was running from someone but I don't know who until I tripped on a twig and my leg snapped in half and flung off I screamed in pain. "Ow you nun of a bleach" A males voice come from behind a bush as he slowly walked out his pants around his ankles and he was holding my leg " I was trying to shit in peace" the man said annoyed "Then this leg hit me it bounced and almost went up my ass" He threw my leg back at me it hitting me in the face "Sorry mister" I looked at the guy to realize he had black hair and black eyes with a cowboy hat on and a cigar in his mouth while his left hand was holding a news paper "Stop staring creepy little girl" He pulled up his pants then quickly pulled them down "Awe gosh dammit fuck my ass I forgot to wipe now there's shit on my pants" He ripped of his pants and threw them at me and I quickly dodged it "Ew mister your gross" He snapped his neck looking at me "Says pippy long stockings with no left leg". I looked down at my leg still holding it "Sorry mister Ill just leave" I wobbled and got up and begin to leave "Now hold on pippy long stockings I am Itachi the super saiyen ninja demon vampire angel demon god werewolf you cant ignore me and walk away without cleaning my pants"He glared at me and shoved his pants in my face so glad i have great gag reflexes from swallowing scrolls and sucking door knobs to erase my finger prints. I begin licking the shit off his pants and stopped as I felt some crunchy turns out it was a piece of corn. I ate it anyway loving the way this guy shit tasted to silky and crunchy kinda like peanut butter. "Yeah lick it pippy you like that crunchy corn don't you". I chocked on his pants as I felt him grab my leg that flung off "Imma use this for a minute" he ripped the bone out my leg and stuck it in ground "There just so people know not to come here" he sighed forgetting about his cigar and it flew into my hair and my hair caught on fire but I was to busy crunching on his corn shit to notice "Water style rain jutsu" water poured down my body wetting my white shirt and i touched my head to feel only little bit is strings of hair left "Awe pippy I still love you" he kissed me his shit swirling between our tongues "Mhmm" he crunched on the corn. We had a wonderful eventful night humping like rabbits
-Time skip-
I am 8 months pregnanet with itachis very first super saiyen
ninja demon vampire angel demon god werewolf baby I cant wait. We are gonna name it Crunchy corn Uchiha