Me: Hi Siri
Siri: Hello, (nickname here)
Me: Get a life
Siri: That may be beyond my abilities at this moment.

Me: Siri, Tell me a joke
Siri: The past, present and future walk into a bar. It was tense.
Me: Thats a bad joke
Siri: Im sorry.

Me: Siri, sing me a song
Siri: you wouldn't like it
Me: Yes I would!
Siri: thats what I thought

Me: Siri, I want sushi
Siri: Calling 911
Me: Oh, God, no!!!!