"Please don't love me like this, she thought. Please not like this. But just the same she could not bear for him to step away from her. To abandon her, cold and used and foolish. Or worse; to leave her heartbroken and forever mourning this delicate moment between them, with all of its promise of what could have been if they weren't doomed from the start."

― Allie Ray, Children of Promise

* * * *

Until when are you going to punish me?

A question she had voicelessly asked him countless times ever since they got married. A question she had been forcing herself to not ask him out loud. She kept telling herself to just endure, to take whatever he was giving her willingly, even if it wasn't enough, even if hurt more than ever, even if sometimes she wished she hadn't married him because ever since they got married, the distance between them seemed infinite. Before, even when he had been far away from her, with countless miles of distance and years spent without talking to him, seeing him, hearing from him, he had felt closer to her than he did now when he was beside her. She felt alone and lonely, more than she ever had been...

She didn't know marrying him would make her that isolated and defenseless. She had not felt like she had a home ever since her parents had passed away, yet now that she was living in Malhotra Mansion, she was realizing how much Tiwari Killa had been her safe place. Now that she didn't have her Nanu waiting for her to come back, now that she didn't have anyone waiting for her to come back home, she felt she had been ungrateful and had taken his presence for granted. And even though she visited him regularly, she couldn't stay for more than a few hours, she had to come back to the building that was apparently supposed to be her home now that she was married. She now had to come home to the people that lived there, who felt like strangers even though she had known them for years. Come home to him, the one who was supposed to come home to her, yet did everything in his power to stay as far from her as possible. And even when he was within her reach, he still was so far away...

The bedroom that was now supposed to be theirs, hers and his, felt nothing but a war zone implanted with ticking bombs that could go off any moment. There was tension between them and she seemed to be the only one affected by it because Shravan went on with his life without even a glance in her direction. His silence was unbreakable, and no matter how much she chased after him, he always seemed to find an escape and kept slipping away from her hands...

There had been a time when she had felt being married to him was her most precious dream and being happy with him was her ultimate goal. It still was, but now that they were married, she knew it wasn't enough. Being married to him didn't mean he was hers. She didn't feel like she was married to him, she barely got to see him for a few minutes each day, and she missed him even though they supposedly lived under the same roof, in the same bedroom...

He didn't listen to her, didn't look her way, didn't acknowledge her presence, not in his room, not in his life, not as a husband would nor as a friend, not even as a stranger would. It was as if she didn't exist. And all of that made her feel more alone than she ever had, lonely and cut off from everyone and everything.

And it made her feel miserable, irritated, angry, and irrational. And that's why the nagging started. To get a reaction out of him, she kept picking fights, kept provoking him to break the silence that was between them. Yet he was determined not to, so he kept eliminating the issues she raised to fight over. The towels no longer would be hanging outside of the bathroom, the wardrobe was more spacious, and the shoes rack no longer had his multiple black shoes, nor the tables were burdened by his overflowing files and law books. Even the dressing table was bare of most of his hair products and the shelves that had been proudly displaying his perfume collection before now were empty, she didn't know where the expensive bottles were locked away now that she was given space to decorate the room as she wanted. Her fights over their room not being theirs led him to believe that he had to strip away his essence in the room...

God, he made her feel petty, small, and insignificant by not giving her any chance to lament about anything, to fight with him about anything...

She was getting tired, a month after being married to him felt as if she had been walking in the desert under the heated sun of the hottest summer. And people around her made things only worse for her with pity, insults, and backhanded compliments for putting up with such a bad and uncaring husband. Even the ones who knew the circumstances they have been married in asked her ridiculous questions.

Why isn't he coming to pick you up?

Why is he still indifferent to you?

Why aren't you doing something about it?

Why hasn't everything been solved between you now that you are married?

Why isn't he talking with you?

Why does he keep ignoring you?

Why isn't he taking you out?

Why doesn't he seem happy?

Why isn't he at dinner?

Why is he always away?

Why is he working so much?

There were countless questions, they kept demanding she does better, and they kept telling her to not fail her wifely duties. They kept giving her disappointed looks with a frown on their faces as if they hadn't been there, as if they didn't know how and in which circumstances they got married.

And then there were the hushed demands of the women of their family asking her if they have already consumed their marriage and if at least that was done with as if that would solve everything. They kept telling her she better not deny him, she better let him, they were married after all. She better not make an issue out of her assault and make him wait. She better not repeat what happened with Aditya and resist. Was she still in love with Aditya? She better forget about Aditya and everything related to him, she better move on from him. And when she denied ever liking Aditya and assured them that that wasn't the case. They kept suggesting she just seduce him if he didn't come to her. They tried to guilt her that the decent man that Shravan was, he must be waiting for her to get over her assault and move on from the other man. She better not disappoint him. She better not keep him waiting. She better do this and that so the man who did her great favor of marrying her does not return her back to them. That probably was Mami's greatest fear. She has finally gotten rid of her, so Suman better not come back. As if she already didn't know what Mami felt towards her, every time she visited Tiwari Killa, she was told she didn't have a place to come back. They kept telling her this and that, to act in that way and not in that way, to do this and not that. Limitations and restrictions now were imposed on her because she was married to a man who seemed truly unhappy to be tied with her, so she better not give him a reason to free himself...

If women from her side of the family were condescending, kept patronizing her, kept subjecting her to their backward and sexist insults, the women of his side of the family were scornful, looking down at her, snobby, mocking her for being worthless even for her husband...

And when Pushkar and Preeti announced the news of her being pregnant, Suman had thought that for at least a little while, everyone's attention would be off her married life and on the good news. And it had been like that, but that didn't mean everyone stopped showing their concerns, in fact, all the more people started to encourage her to fall pregnant too. Apparently, trapping him in a marriage wasn't enough, to sustain that marriage, she must bring children into their nonfunctioning marriage. The children had the ability to make the unwilling party give in after all. They kept giving her examples of that man Mausa Ji knew or that woman Mami Ji knew, who were married against their will but as soon as a child came into their lives, they accepted their marriage. That's how things were done in their society, they said. Be it a man or woman, whoever wasn't happy with their marriage, after a child they started to be happy with the marriage. So she too must take that path, she was told. By giving birth to his child, she could force him to accept their marriage, resigned to his fate...

Day by day, her anger and frustration increased, the taunts and the so-called suggestions were pushing her into turmoil, and as always, Shravan became the victim of her outbursts. She kept throwing fits and acting unreasonably and then regretted it, spending the time he wasn't around being consumed by guilt and regret...

It was suffocating, being viewed as an unloved wife who was forced upon her husband, it was painful. And then she realized she was living the life her mother had. Even if Shravan wasn't anything like her father, she was being treated as her mother by their families and the outsiders. Their gaze on her was full of pity as if they could ever understand what had happened and was happening between her and Shravan. In their own ways and their own words, they kept letting her know how misfortuned she was. And she was, just not for the reason they thought of her. And then there was the unsaid and untold conviction of theirs that something must be wrong with her, that she was the problem, that she must be doing something wrong, it must be her, she was the reason why her married life was so visibly a tragedy...

So when she felt she wouldn't be able to endure it all for him anymore, she couldn't help but break in front of him and ask him something she knew she shouldn't have. Something she never wanted to, something she couldn't even put in words until he muttered them.

"Do you want me to pretend, Sumo?" He had asked her.

And she wanted to tell him that no. She wished she could have the ability to tell him that, no, she didn't want him to pretend. She wanted him to love her, she wanted him to be her husband and let her be his wife, she wanted them to be the newlywed they were supposed to be, that she wanted him and she wanted him to want her too...

But she couldn't. She couldn't demand that after everything that happened between them, between him and his parents, after forcing him to marry her. She couldn't demand him to do that when he barely seemed to be functioning, resembling an alive corpse as he went through day and night disconnected from everything and everyone...

So she told him that yes, she wanted him to pretend. She wanted him to pretend to be a caring husband and let her be a dutiful wife. She told him to act in front of others, act like a happily married man and let her be close to him. And she hoped, desperately, with all of her that each soft smile, each tender gaze, each caring gesture, and each warm touch would assure him how good they would be together once they surpass the difficulties and move on from the hurt and pain and heal together...

****

Second month

***

He adhered to her request and pretended in front of others that they were now happy together. He pretended to have accepted her as his wife and did everything a caring husband should be. He let her take care of him in front of others, let her be his wife, and do small and big things for him, but as soon as they stepped into their bedroom, he made sure she knew she couldn't crowd his space and let him be. He let her wait for him at dinner whenever he was late and make his breakfast in the mornings but as soon as the prying eyes of his father or whoever wanted to observe their interactions were no longer on them, his furrowed brows let her know how he hated her waiting for him to come home and whatever she did for him on the breakfast table. He let her comment on his clothes in front of others and let her choose his neckties and shirts but there was a strong unexpressed agitation that showed only in his eyes but not on his face. His beautiful molten honey eyes always gave away whatever he was feeling, and they couldn't lie even now. Agitation always got louder in his eyes whenever she smiled at him. He let her touch her and lean on him, hold him close, but remained stiff, resisting to flinch, and stepped away from her as soon as they were alone.

Instead of getting easier, pretending was getting more difficult each day, she could tell...

Instead of bringing them closer, it was slowly doing something else, something strange that she couldn't pinpoint...

Something was stirring between them, unpredictable and full of tension, which in turn agitated her, and made her wary but not prudent. It made her reckless, irrational, and trembling with the force of her fear of losing him. She went into the battles she picked with him while overwhelmed with a sense of disquietude...

And that day, even though there was a part of her that kept telling her that she was going to regret what she was about to do, as soon as she got to know about it, as soon as she was handed the papers and the metal box that came with it, she was consumed by an uncontrollable and all-consuming rage, and a culmination of everything she had been feeling. Impulsive, without listening to anyone and her own brain, with the papers in her hands, she descended on him like a dark hawk with the intention of destroying the silence between them by letting all the ticking bombs explode...

***

There were times like these when the feeling of utter devastation was overwhelming enough for his system to shut down completely, leaving him numb to everything going on around him. In those times, and moments like the one he was living now, Suman Tiwari was a mesmerizing sight to watch. A perfect predator at work. And with his concept of the reality lost and only numbness to keep him company, he could actually appreciate the destructive force that she was in his life.

Emptying the shelves that had been proudly displaying his books and files, throwing everything down with aggressiveness, surrounded by mess, with her open hair wild and her eyes burning, she looked eternal, lethal, destruction in its most beautiful form...

Suddenly she stopped still, eyes fixed towards the now open door, and only then he realized that there were two other audiences to the breathtaking sight of Suman Tiwari on her quest to destroy things that were unfortunate enough to belong to him...

"Pushkar, Preeti," she shuttered quietly, panting as she took in the sight of her sister standing still by the door, shell-shocked.

And Pushkar being the brave man that he was, walked into the room and took in the mess.

"Why, Suman?" He asked, calling her by her given name after years.

Pushkar hadn't been sure of them getting married so soon, till the day of the wedding, he had been conflicted as to what to do to make sure this marriage wouldn't be something that would further mess up his brother's life. A brother he had always been protective of even though never had been able to protect. But then one day suddenly things started to get better, and he had been relieved along with others, and he had dared to hope that things had gone back to normal between his brother and his now wife, that they were finally happy now. But the yelling that had attracted them to their room told another story altogether.

"What's happening here?" Pushkar asked her before turning to look at his brother who was looking at her with a numbing calmness.

"Nothing that can't be fixed with his father's money," she spat bitterly as she looked at Shravan gazing back at her with an expressionless face, unmoved, and that fueled her anger even more.

"Why did you do this?" Pushkar demanded her, with anger in his voice.

"Pushkar," Shravan's voice commanded his attention but for once he ignored the warning he was given.

As Suman looked at the younger man who was her friend and her cousin sister's husband glaring at her, she felt the injustice of the act. It wasn't her who should be glared at, she decided that the truth should be told for once. So she walked to the table near the sofa Shravan was sitting so calmly and picked up the papers that were the cause of her rage and the destruction she caused around them.

Walking back to where Pushkar was standing, she handed him the papers that she had thrown at Shravan as soon as she had walked into their room a few minutes ago after making sure no one was at home, the reason why she hadn't paid attention to keep her voice down and suppress her urge to destroy that calmness present on his face. But now as she saw Pushkar scan the paper, she knew he would understand her actions.

But when she saw Pushkar returning to glare at her without looking at the rest of the papers, she felt betrayed.

"This is the reason?" He asked her with disbelief and disappointment in his eyes.

"I was there when he had signed these papers. Bade Papa had told us both to buy personal cars for you and Preeti. I had bought one for Preeti after talking to her, but Bhaiya said that you would mind but at the same time it couldn't be overlooked that your car no longer functions. So I told him to choose midway and that's how he decided to buy the car on loan, in installments he knew you could pay off," Pushkar told her as he continued to glare at her, looking down at her with disappointment.

"Well, he didn't have any right to decide for me. It shouldn't concern him if my car functions or not," she said, anger still visible on her face.

"You are his wife, why doesn't it concern him? It's for your safety, let's not pretend that it has been having problems for years now," Pushkar told her.

"If and when I felt I needed a new car, I would have done it myself. I didn't need money from him, nor his interference," Suman said, irritated with the meddling yet forcing herself to not lose patience.

"Please Di, don't tell me it's about your pride and self-respect," Preeti muttered with a huff, talking for the first time.

"Pushkar bought me a car too, you don't see me complaining. So what does that make me? A golddigger? Am I taking advantage of his money? Sacrificing my self-respect and pride?" She asked, agitating as she continued.

"It's not that, you don't understand," Suman muttered calmly, not wanting to upset her pregnant sister.

"It is, I know you. What's wrong with accepting and appreciating a thoughtful and caring gesture? You want to be financially independent, that's good, you want to work even after getting married and earn money on your own, that's amazing. But does that make me and other housewives wrong when we accept gifts from our husbands? Why are you looking down at us? What's wrong in choosing to be a homemaker?" Preeti asked her with a frown, annoyed at her cousin.

"There is nothing wrong with that, don't take this personally, Preeti," Suman told her with a tiring sigh.

"It is personal if this is the way you think a wife should behave when her husband buys an expensive gift for her. If you think you are right in doing so, that means you think I am wrong by not reacting like this," Preeti said, gesturing to the mess surrounding them.

How could she tell her cousin who always had her parents and now her husband to pay for things she wanted and not needed without them making her feel like a burden, without them making her feel like they were doing her a favor? Has Preeti ever been taunted for eating too much, for taking too much space, for taking things that were meant for others? Preeti who had attended a nail paint course, a dance course before that, and many other extra activities, had that sweet Preeti ever noticed how Suman's school and then college fees were always late, given only after she had been humiliated enough times for being a financial liability? Had Preeti ever suppressed her small desires and big dreams because she didn't have someone who would pay for her? Had Preeti ever doubted whatever she wanted wasn't important enough to ask for? Has she ever been weighed down by the burden of the unpaid debt of her dead parents?

Did she ever notice how her own mother had behaved towards Suman all their childhood, teenage years, and early twenties till Suman had become fully independent?

Yes, she wanted to be financially independent, but not because of her 'feminist' ideas or whatever was that they thought of her, but because she no longer wanted to feel like she was a burden, a liability, unwanted, and an extra expense...

Yes, she couldn't accept that her husband bought her an expensive gift when she never had anyone apart from Nanu give her anything or buy something for her without making her feel like they were spending money on her that could be invested in better things. She couldn't deal and wouldn't ever be able to deal with it if Shravan made her feel like that. She didn't want any monetary issue to add to the already long list of the issues they had between them. She didn't want one more reason to feel miserable, defeated, more heartbroken than she already was...

"Do you not realize that we are married into the Malhotra family and that means there are so many standards to maintain? Do you even know how humiliating it is for other people in this family to let you work even after marriage and on top of it, drive such a car?" Preeti asked her with a huff.

"Okay, that's enough," Shravan interrupted them.

"What are you two even doing here?" He asked them with a glare as he came to stand in between the two and Suman.

"Preeti wasn't feeling well, that's why we came home early, but the noise and yelling could be heard all the way downstairs, we thought to check if everything was alright with you both," Pushkar explained.

"Well, everything is, you both should go to sleep now," Shravan told them, gesturing at the door.

"But Bhahiya, this mess," Pushkar started to justify why he thought he should interfere, and before he could continue, he was cut off mid-sentence.

"We don't need anyone meddling between us, Pushkar, it has already happened enough times, no more. We both are married and fights happen between married couples, it's not something that needs external interference," Shravan said, firmly, leaving no room to have an objection.

"I won't tolerate either of you disrespecting my wife irrespective of what you are to her," he said with a glare toward Preeti.

"Then you should solve issues between you both by communicating with each other and not by yelling and throwing things around," Pushkar muttered, glaring at Suman.

"Come one, Pushkar, let's go," Preeti told her husband after taking hold of his elbow, she lightly pushed him away from the other couple.

"Fine," he gave in with a huff.

"Bhaiya, remember tomorrow we have a meeting with Mr Shetty, let's go together after launch," he reminded Shravan.

And after an exchange of nods with his brother and glares between him and Suman, Pushkar walked out of the room following his wife and closing the door after him in the hope that one day soon enough things would get better between them. It wasn't the element of love that wasn't missing between them, he knew that, it was communication and trust that their relationship seemed to lack. So he could only hope that the way other issues got solved between them, this would too. He hoped it was only a fight, and that everything between them was as good as it seemed apparent after observing their interactions from the past month...

***

"Why didn't you tell me anything? Why didn't you explain what happened?"

It was hours after their fight, or could she even call it that if it had been just her throwing a fit and trashing the room while he had stayed calm and indifferent, just a spectator. And even now when she was drowning in regret and guilt after actually reading the papers, and learning about what Pushkar had revealed. She was pacing around the room while Shravan being Shravan he has been for months now, was calmly cleaning up, making a neat pile of his files, and books, and putting everything back in order.

"Do you think that would have helped? You have been wanting to pick a fight for months now, I thought I should just give you one at least this time around," Shravan muttered with a nonchalance shrug.

"Oh, how generous of you," she muttered and rolled her eyes.

"Glad to be of help," he responded with his twisted sense of humor.

"God, you make me act so petty and feel so miserable," she told him with a sigh.

She observed him for a second and when he didn't respond to her, acting as if he hadn't heard her, she stopped her pacing and walked towards him with the intention to help him, do something that he would nag her for. After her pleading and quarreling, he explained how she needed to put the files in the correct order.

"Please explain how this loan thing works, I didn't get much after reading the papers," she lied just to get him to talk to her.

And that's how he explained to her in his calm voice how much she had to pay monthly and for how long, the consequences of not paying on time, and even though PCD was doing well and she wouldn't have any problem in paying the installments, and if some unexpected expense came her way and she was unable to pay it, he would pay it and she can return it once she got back on her feet.

"Let's not make it weird than it already is for others and let me pay for it. It was really hard to convince Papa that he shouldn't be worried about the loan when he got to know this," he said in an attempt to convince her.

"You know why I reacted the way I had, right?" She asked him, hoping at least he understood her.

"I know, that's the reason why I thought the loan was a better idea because Papa wasn't taking a no for an answer. I remember what you had told me about the PCD and help, the whole Aditya episode, that you don't need financial help from anyone, not even me. Or was it especially from me?" He asked with a bitter laugh.

"One day when you will be willing to hear, I will tell you why, and then maybe you will understand," she told him with a shuddering sigh.

"I already know. Back then I just had dared to think I was an exception. That I wasn't just anyone for you. But after today, it's so clear that I was and always will be, no matter what, even you being married to me couldn't change that," he whispered with a shrug.

That's not true, she wanted to claim. But it was. She didn't want it to hurt him, she wanted him to understand that and accept that, be okay with it, and not take it as something against him. But they weren't there yet, for her to tell him something without fearing that would push him even further away from her.

"If that would have been the case, I wouldn't have let you fight my battle or talk to Preeti on my behalf," she pointed out.

"Oh, I thought you let me because you wanted me to pretend to be a caring husband," he muttered with a frigid irony.

"Anyway, your ability to pick up a fight and respond brutally only works on me and is limited to me, that's why it doesn't matter who talks down to you, you somehow never are able to respond," he stated his observation out loud.

"That's not true," she protested.

"I didn't see you responding to Preeti after what she said," he reminded her.

"She is pregnant," she justified.

"As if she wasn't, you would have said something," he muttered as he closed the last file on the now neat pile.

"Would you please stop being so cold and indifferent towards me?" She asked after a long silence.

"I keep picking fights because that's the only time when you look at me, listen to me, otherwise it's as if I am not even in the same room as yours. I don't like silence between us, Shravan. Are things so bad between us that you are denying me your voice, and your gaze, and wouldn't even fight with me?" Suman asked in a whisper.

"Please talk to me, even if just to fight with me. And if you don't want to fight, just let me hear your voice. If you don't want to talk about anything, just tell me about your day, the cases you are working on, anything, please, just... I miss your voice," she told him, pleading earnestly.

And when he looked at her and kept looking at her with his silent lips yet talking eyes, she felt frustration build within her. His lips were pressed together tightly, a stubborn frown on his forehead, and a loud refusal in his eyes. He wasn't going to talk to her.

"Fine, go in the mute mood once again, see if I care," she muttered in frustration before standing and walking away from him.

And maybe that was why he couldn't, because he knew, he knew her, he knew she meant things, but only for a short while, impatient for the results, she gave up when he didn't act within the ticking time, and walked away when he didn't react the way she wanted him to...

"I didn't mean that, sorry, I just want you to talk to me, I want to hear your voice, I would always want you to talk to me," she said after once again returning back, unable to take more than a few steps away from him.

She came back, she always came back due to her regret and guilt. She came back to him as if he was only a bad habit she couldn't get rid of, and like an addict, she couldn't stay away for long. She too made him feel miserable, she too made him act petty. To test her, he too kept holding himself back to see till when she would stay away, till when she wouldn't give up...

"You wanted me to pretend only in front of others, not in front of you too," he reminded her.

"That doesn't mean we can't have a civil conversation between us. Why do I have to beg you to talk with me for a few minutes?" She asked with an irritated sigh.

"Do I have to pretend and act in front of you too?" He asked her with that annoyingly expressionless face of his.

And he kept looking at her with all seriousness as if he really was waiting for her to answer him. As if he would actually do that if she asked him to...

"Argh, God, Shravan," she muttered in an attempt to suppress the urge to claw that seemingly calm but actual indifference off of his face and his manners.

****

Third month

* * *

"We are closing a big trail, that's why things are hectic," Shravan muttered as he looked down at the files that he seemed to always bring home.

After months of seeing him overworking himself, Suman should have gotten used to it. Yet every time he brought work home, she couldn't help but ask him about it. And his answers remain the same; it was important...It couldn't wait...

That sometimes being the only words he would willingly utter for her. The rest of the day and night if he talked to her, it was only in front of others, even then he would say only what was needed to put up the facade but in the privacy of their room, the silence continued. He deprived her of him, of his friendship and companionship, of his voice, attention, and gaze, and everything that she had been given before and everything she had taken for granted, daring to think she would always have him even if she pushed him away, even if she did whatever she had done. But now, she had nothing of him...

Oh, he was taking his revenge so well, she couldn't help but think every time she looked at him but never found him looking at her...

"How long would it take?" Suman asked with a concerned frown.

"Do you want me to shut off the lights?" He asked her, remembering their fights over her losing sleep due to him working with lights on.

"It's one of Salma auntie's NGO cases, I need to submit the paperwork," he responded busily as his eyes fixed on the screen as kept typing and then looking at the file on the table from time to time.

"Is it urgent?" She asked, observing how often he was blinking his eyes, his speech slow, and movement even slower, and with the way he was frowning, he was also suffering a headache. All the signs that he was tired enough to pass out any moment yet was being stubborn and refusing his body the rest it was demanding.

"Not really," he answered without moving his eyes away from the files.

"Then come on, sleep," she said, taking the laptop away and saving the files he had been working on.

"I am not sleepy" he insisted, finally looking up at her.

"Oh, believe me, Shravan, if you are this responsive and talking to me without me pushing you and begging you, that means you must be very sleepy for your defenses to be this down," she muttered with a bitter laugh before getting hold of his arm and pushing him up.

"What are you doing?" He asked but let her pull him up and followed her to bed.

"It's time for you to sleep, that's it," she insisted and pushed to sit on his side of the bed.

"I am sleeping here," he responded, attempting to move away.

"How long do you want to keep insisting on sleeping on that sofa of yours?" She snapped at him.

"Look, Shravan, we are both adults, we are married. The bed is big enough for us to sleep so let's not make a big deal out of it. I promise to not touch you without your consent," she said, raising her hands up in all seriousness.

"If you want barriers between us, we can do that, happy?" She told him as she kept piling pillows to separate their sides of the bed.

And when he kept looking at her, speechless, she sighed and continued her attempt to convince him.

"You are tall, you have been suffering from sleeplessness, back pain, neck pain, and headaches, don't you dare to deny it. If you don't want me to sleep on the sofa, then you also shouldn't. We can stick to our sides of the bed and be mature about the situation. There is no need for you to sacrifice stupidly," she said with a determined frown.

And as he kept looking at her with wide shocked eyes, she knew her theory of his brain functioning slowly due to the lack of sleep was right. Taking advantage of his confusion, she shut off the lights hurriedly and took place on her side of the bed, muttering good night and closing her eyes in the hope he would give in if he saw her not moving around much.

Sitting there on his side of the bed, Shravan's eyes kept shutting off and he couldn't find the strength to stand up and drag himself to the sofa. It was tempting, he admitted to himself. To be able to finally sleep on the bed was a tempting offer he shouldn't refuse, his hazy brain kept insisting. And when Shravan turned to observe her unmoving figure under the blanket, he couldn't deny what she had told him was true. Maybe if he slept well in the night his headaches would reduce and his bones wouldn't ache the way they have been ever since he started to sleep on the sofa. He didn't have the habit of moving much in his sleep, nor did she, he had noticed that. It should be fine if they kept their distance. It was worth a try, he couldn't help but give in. Tried and sleepy, he got on his side of the bed with a sigh and laid with his back facing hers. And it took only a few seconds before his system blacked out and after months he was able to sleep soundly without the nightmare haunting him...

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A/N:- Updating after such a long time, that's why a long chapter to make up. I hope it was worth the wait, and I hope you all liked it... :)

So here is the chapter with Suman's POV as promised...Hopefully, now her thoughts, feelings, and restlessness are clear, and so is the reason why she asked him to pretend. With all her flaws and imperfections, Suman too is a creature of habit and suffers from impulsiveness and old unhealed wounds that make her what she is and acts as she does...What are your thoughts on her?

Shravan is a slow process and there are many things that changing steadily. There is so much happening yet nothing is getting registered in his system because everything is moving past him and nothing makes sense. But there are interesting things happening around him, to him, more on that in the next chapter... ;)

Are you are liking the story so far? Please, leave a comment or two to tell me your thoughts and feelings about the chapter... :)

Thank you for reading, liking, waiting, and commenting...Thank you for the support, the kind words, and the sweet gestures... <3

Thank you and stay safe! <3

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