XV
I try to smile when you say you love me.
When you say you'll dress me with stars,
Clothe me in a blanket of sky.
I try to smile as as I feel your nimble fingers skim across my skin
Feeling every fold and depression on it,
As if you were a sculpture, and it, your clay-
And you meant to paint me with your colours.
Mould me to your liking.
I try to smile as you begin to scratch me, gouge me,
As I feel red trickling along my body.
As you undress me without asking.
Without taking into consideration- my wants.
Am I an object of your desire?
Should I not scream when you grasp my neck-
and bite it?
I try to smile when your frothy lips lick my skin.
When your moaning mouth gnaws my legs.
When your wanting fingers tear my arms.
And I try to shrug you off me.
But I can't.
Because you are my husband, and you reign over me.
Over my useless body, my exhausted soul.
Because you're a man, and I an object.
And hence my elements must bend to your will.
I try to smile.
And you don't let me.
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