Maria pov
..--_~~_--..

As we all climb into the taxi I feel a scowl setting into place on my face. It is silent for a while but then John turns to my father with that look.
"Ok the smoking, how did you know?" He asks over me. I'm starting to notice that I'm ending up in between these two men a lot.
"The evidence was right under your nose, John, as ever you see but you do not observe," Sherlock says. I pull an ashtray that I had swiped from the palace out of my coat.
"Observe what?" John asks not yet having noticed the ashtray. I throw it up and catch it
"The ashtray, Watson," I grin handing it to Sherlock who smirks as he slides it into his coat.
John laughs and rolls his eyes.
"I can't believe you actually stole an ashtray from Buckingham Palace," he says. I smirk smugly and shrug.
"Harry was getting on my nerves and what uncle Mikey said annoyed me so... hey I might give it back or I might not, depends on if I'm in a good mood when they ask for it," I say. With a chuckle from John and Sherlock, the rest of the car ride is pretty much silent.

(Back at 221b)

John and I are sitting in the lounge as sherlock throws things about in our room.
"What are you doing?" I ask more concerned about who will have to clean all that up later then what my father is actually up to.
John looks up also wanting to know though I suspect he is more interested in what he is actually doing.
"I'm going into battle, John, I need the right armour," he calls back. I scoff.
"John didn't even ask moron," I mutter as Sherlock walks into view wearing a bright yellow police jacket.
"Nope," he says more to himself than us.
I roll my eyes and stand up from Sherlock's chair. Strolling into the room I walk up to my father.
"I assume you are trying to find something that will make this woman invite you meaning us into her home?" I ask not exactly expecting asks answer.
I hand him the shirt he had been wearing at the Palace and then pick up a white clerical collar.
"Boom, most people would let an injured priest into their home, unless they are pure evil but we will figure that out when the time comes," I say handing over the items of clothing and walking back to the door of the room.
"I am not injured," he says
"I can fix that for you," I grin "I'll call a cab then," I add walking out.
"Come on John, we're off," I say strolling out the door and down to the street.
Once he had changed shirt Sherlock comes out with John and they jump into the cab which I had just gotten to pull up. Rolling my eyes I get in behind them.
Sherlock tells the cabbie the address.
"So what's the plan?" John asks after a while.
"Well we know her address," I chime
"What we just ring the doorbell?" John asks puzzled
"Exactly," I grin.
"Just here please," Sherlock tells the driver.
"You didn't even change your clothes," John says rolling his eyes slightly.
"Also You're cleaning up the mess when we get home," I say jumping out of the cab. Sherlock rolls his eyes and ignores my comment.
"Then it's time to add a splash of colour," he says.
They get out of the cab, pay the cabbie and then we walk around the corner into a side street.
Sherlock pulls his scarf off in one fluid movement and turns to face John glancing around.
I pout and cross my arms standing to the side.
"Are we hear?" John asks
"Two streets away, but this will do," Sherlock replies
"For what?" John asks slightly confused
"Punch me, in the face," Sherlock commands bending down slightly
"Punch you?" John says curiously
"Yes, punch me in the face, didn't you hear me?" Sherlock asks
"I always hear punch you when your talking," I chime, John nods
"Its usual subtext," John adds
"Oh for God's sake," Sherlock whines throwing a punch at John's chest pushing him down. He then prepares himself as John stands and brushes the dirt off.
I step forward but then stop when John throws a punch at Sherlock's face just as asked
He pulls his hand back and flexes it a few times as Sherlock regains his footing
"Thank you, that was, that was..." Sherlock starts before John tackles him. I contemplate pulling him off but then realizes anything attempts would probably be futile and at the moment it's not too out of hand just as little quarrel.
John pulls Sherlock into a choke hold and I move towards them.
"Ok, I think we're done now, John," Sherlock says struggling.
"You want to remember, Sherlock, I was a soldier, I killed people," John grunts
"You were a doctor!" Sherlock says
"I had bad days!" John snaps back. I give up on trying to pull John off and instead push then two over causing John to let go
Sherlock stands and coughs slightly awkwardly before pulling the clerical collar out and fixing it in place.
"We should, uh, let's go then?" I say rubbing my hands on my jeans.
With silent nods, Sherlock and John walk in the direction of Irene Adler's home.

We walk up the steps to the large house and Sherlock presses the doorbell. While we wait he goes silent. I wait off to the side and John waits just behind him.
After a while, a woman answers using the camera just by the door.
"Hello?" She calls out.
Sherlock leans towards the small camera and with exaggeration whimpers
"Oh, um, sorry to disturb you," he looks around slightly as though looking out for someone
"Um, I've just been attacked, um, and I think they... they took my wallet and um, and my phone, please, could you help me?" He asks in a panicked tone. I smirk slightly knowing I'm not in view of the camera and roll my eyes.  It might actually be believable.
I take a small breath and prepare to start acting.
"I could phone the police if you want," the woman says with a sigh.
"Thank you, thank you. Could you, please?" Sherlock says again looking around slightly. He makes eye contact with me and I tilt my head towards the door slightly.
"Er, would you... would you mind if I just waited here, just until they come?" He asks. Stepping back slightly.
"Thank you, thank you so much," he says holding up a handkerchief to the bruise forming on his check from where John had punched him. Just to add to the effect he sobs slightly.
The door buzzes indicating that she had opened it and we all enter.
Sherlock goes first still babbling out thank you. Followed by me than John.
"We saw it happen," I say quietly hiding behind John to give the illusion that I am shy.
"Its ok, I'm a doctor," John adds placing a hand on my shoulder slightly before closing the door.
"Have you got a first aid kit?" He asks. The woman smiles
"In the kitchen, please," she says slightly waving her hand in the general direction.
John nods
"Oh, thank you, you stay with them I'll be right back," he says patting my shoulder before walking off.
She leads me and Sherlock into a pristine white room which appears to be either a living room or a waiting room of sorts.
Sherlock sits on the main couch with his coat next to him and I sit on the Victorian style fainting couch of to the side in the large Bay window.
After a while, a woman who I can only assume is Adler calls out
"Hello, sorry to hear that you've been hurt," she says her heels clicking on the hardwood floor as she walks towards the room. 
Sherlock looks up to the door lifting the handkerchief again before letting his gaze fall on the Chrystal bowl on the coffee table.
"I don't think Katelynn caught your name?" She calls
I look up just as she walks in
"I'm so sorry, I'm..." Sherlock starts also looking up at the fully nude woman.
"Emily," I mutter looking down and away nervously. I will admit I was shocked but I've seen the female body before it's nothing new to me, Sherlock, on the other hand, freezes up slightly and stares a little mouth open.
"Oh, it's always hard to remember an alias when you've had a fright," the woman smirks walking into the room and to the spot right in front of Sherlock "Isn't it?" She asks reaching out and pulling the clerical collar off.
"There now, we're both defrocked," she says "Mr Sherlock Holmes,"
"Miss Adler, I presume?" Sherlock asks looking her in the eye. I roll mine and glance around the room while the attention is not on me.
"Look at those cheekbones, I could cut myself slapping that face," Adler says seductively "would you like me to try?" She asks him clamping the clerical collar between her teeth. I smirk.
"Yes please," I mutter, "Its rather amusing watching him get hit by people," I add.
She glances to me and just then John walks in
"Right, this should do it," she says holding a bowl of water and a rag. Adler moves her focus to him, and he looks at her shocked. Quickly looking down at the items in his hands John opens his mouth to say something but then closes it before eventually looking up confused.
"I've missed something, haven't I?" He asks  Sherlock rolls his eyes slightly and Irene removes the clerical collar from her mouth. I nod.
"Yup," I say quietly.
"Please, sit down, or if you'd like some tea, I can call the maid," Adler says sitting in the armchair just in front of me.
"I had some at the Palace," Sherlock says
"Psh you didn't even drink any of the tea there, you were to busy sulking" I mutter standing and moving next to Sherlock.
"I know," Adler says seemingly also ignoring me much as Harry had at the Palace.
"Clearly," Sherlock says staring at her.
John step forward
"I had tea, too, at the Palace, if anyone is interested," he says
I glance at him with an eyebrow raised.
"I really don't think anyone is John," I say with a slight smile.
As Sherlock looks between the woman and John clearly deducting, I had tried to deduce something from the woman but other then what we already knew I could not get anything, I new Sherlock probably wouldn't either.
"Do you know the big problem with a disguise, Mr Holmes?" Adler asks. I raise a brow in curiosity as does Sherlock.
"However hard you try, it's always a self-portrait," she says.
Sherlock looks slightly confused.
"You think I'm a vicar with a bleeding face?" He asks. I roll my eyes and Irene grins
"I think you're damaged, delusional and believe in a higher power," she says "in your case it's yourself," she adds. I snicker at the jab towards my father's egotistical tendencies.
He glares at her then slightly in my direction.
"Hmm, and somebody loves you," she says. John looks at me confused and I just grin at him.
"If I had to punch that face I'd avoid your nose and teeth too," Adler says turning her attention to me then John.  He looks to her still confused he lets out a nervous laugh
"could you put something on, please?"  He asks "er anything at all, a napkin?" He says offering her one of the napkins he had been holding on to, to use to clean up Sherlocks wound.
"Why? are you feeling exposed?" Irene asks slyly.
Sherlock stands
"I don't think John knows where to look," I say with an eye roll
Sherlock holds his coat up for her.
"No, I think he knows exactly where," Adler says with a smirk standing right in from to John. She holds her hand out and takes the jacket.
"I'm not sure about you," she says to Sherlock. He looks down
"If I want to look at naked women, I borrow John's laptop." He says. I roll my eyes and scoff.
"You do borrow my laptop," John says staring at Sherlock.
"I confiscate it," he says
"Well never mind we've got better things to talk about," Adler says. I nod
"Hello yeah, we do," I mutter.
"Now tell me, I need to know, how was it done?" She asks sitting down next to me where Sherlock had been and pulling her heels off.
"What?" Sherlock asks.
"The hiker with the bashed in head," she asks holding her heels in her hand. "How was he killed?"
Both men look confused. John stares at Sherlock and Sherlock shaking his head slightly.
"That's not why I'm here," he says confused.
"No, no, no, you're here for the photographs, but that's never going to happen," Adler says "and since we're here just chatting anyway..." John looks at her confused
"That story's not been on the news yet, how do you know about it?" He asks moving to stand closer to Sherlock more in view.
"I know one of the policemen, well, I know what he likes," she smirks
John nods and looks between Adler and Sherlock.
"Oh, and you like policemen?" He asks directing the question to Adler.
I stand up and move back to the fainting couch John takes my place next to Adler. 
"I like detective stories, and detectives," she says
"Hmm, so do I, but I suppose I'm living with one now," I say as I sprawl out on the chair trying not to think about the possibility that she had been lying on it naked.
Sherlock looks at me before turning back to Adler. 
"Brainy is the new sexy," Adler says. I shrug.
"Sure if that's what you're into I guess," I say. I see John smirk slightly.
"Position of the car," Sherlock slurs out so the sentence is almost just a jumble.
"Uh, the position of the car, relative to the hiker at the time of the backfire, that and the fact that the death blow was to the back of the head, that's all you need to know," he says catching his wording again and rambling the information out at lightning speed. I snicker at his attempt to impress someone in the room.
"Okay, tell me how he was murdered?" Adler asks while John stares at Sherlock puzzled by his momentary muddled words
"He wasn't," I say
Finally turning her attention to me she raises her perfectly plucked eyebrow at me and looks down her nose in an attempt to intimidate.
"You don't think it was murder?" She asks.
I stand.
"I Know It wasn't," I say
"How?" She asks
"the same way that I know the victim was an excellent sportsman, recently returned from foreign travel," I say.
"And that the photographs we are looking for as requested in this room," I add. John stares at me still confused. Adler looks at me with a slight hint of nervousness.
"Ok, but how?" She says
"So they are in this room," Sherlock smiles, "Thank you, John man the door, let no one in," he says. John nods and stands to place the bowl and napkins he had still been holding down on the table, he exits closing the door behind him.
Irene looks slightly defeated.
"Two men alone in the countryside, several yards apart and one car," I say walking towards stand next to Sherlock
"Oh I thought we were looking for the photos now,"  Irene pouts
"No, no, looking takes ages, I'm just going to find them," Sherlock says pacing slightly. Before stopping at the large mirror.
"But your moderately clever and we've got a moment," he says
"So let's pass the time, two men, a car and nobody else," I say as Sherlock turns to face her.
"Drivers trying to fix his engine," Sherlock says
"Getting nowhere," I add "and the hiker is taking a moment, looking at the sky," I say thinking back to the scene that John had been Skypeing to us earlier
"Watching the birds? Any moment now, somethings going to happen, what?" Sherlock asks expecting the woman to answer
"The hiker's going to die," Irene says
"No, that's the result, what's going to happen?" Sherlock asks her.
"I don't understand," Irene says.
"Oh, Well, try to," Sherlock says pacing around the room again
"Why?" Irene asks her voice slightly irritating me as she whines.
"Because you cater to the whims of the pathetic and take your clothes off to make an impression," I say crossing my arms
"Stop boring me and think, it's the new sexy," Sherlock says harshly. Irene looks like she is deep in thought and I sigh.
"The cars going to backfire," she says.
"There's going to be a loud noise," I add
"So what?" She asks looking at me.
"Oh, noises are important, noises can tell you everything," Sherlock says 
"For instance..." I say looking at my father as the smoke alarm goes off in the hall where John is.
Irene looks at the door then immediately at the large mirror behind me and Sherlock. He spins and smirks.
"Thank you," he says walking towards it.
"On hearing a smoke alarm, it is a mother's instinct to look towards her child," I say also walking towards it.
"Amazing how fire exposes our priorities," I add.
Sherlock runs his hands under then mantle and clicks a button. The mirror lifts with a mechanical whir to reveal a safe.
"I Really hope don't you have a baby in here," Sherlock says turning to her as she stands.
"Alright John you can turn it off now," I call out as the noise starts to get on my nerves.
"I said you can turn it off now!" I call again.
"Give me a minute!" He calls back
I hear what sounds like a gunshot and a muffled "Thank you" but think nothing of it just yet.
Sherlock hums as he stares at the lock of the safe
"Should always use gloves with these things you know," he says
He then goes on to explain to Mrs Adler about the oil deposits on the keys but my mind is elsewhere as I think about the gunshot.
I dive behind the armchair and press myself against it. Getting a look from the two as I do so.
I stay there and they continue talking about the code,
While staying down I think about that.
Six digits, not a birthday, she says she has already told us?. I think about it than it to clicks. Just as I'm about to say the door opens and I can see in the glass of the window and by their reaction that it is not John but armed men
"Hands behind your head, on the floor, Keep it still!" The leader says. American.
"Sorry Sherlock," John says.
I stay down but quietly pull my phone and headphones outputting them in but not turning anything on. I slump against the chair back and pretend that like any other teenager I'm just doing my own thing.
"Miss Adler, on the floor!" The American demands
"Do you want me on the floor too?" Sherlock asks. I bite back a laugh and roll my eyes. 
"No, sir, I want you to open the safe," the American asks
"American, interesting, why would you care?" Sherlock says curiously.
"Sir, the safe, now, please," the American demands.
"I don't know the code," Sherlock says.
'Damn it. Think father think please don't be messing with these people Americans are not to be messed with.' I think to myself opening my phone and typing a coded text to Lestrade,
"We've been listening, she said she told you," he says
"Well if you've been listening you'll know that she didn't," Sherlock says
"I'm assuming I missed something, from your reputation, I'm assuming you didn't, Mr Holmes," the American says irritated. "Where is the girl?" He asks. I bite the inside of my lip.
"What girl?" Sherlock asks
"Like I said I've been listening, there was a girl with you, she sounded young," the American says.
I prepare to stand, sending the text to Lestrade.
"I will have you know I am almost seventeen, I'm basically an adult," I say standing with my arms crossed, leaving my phone on the ground.
The American and my father look at me.
"Get on the ground with the others," the American demands
"Gosh fine, see if they had of just let me go to the mall instead of dragging me all over the place I would not be In this bloody mess," I huff rolling my eyes with attitude and walking briskly to knell next to John, I put my hands up and huff. I look up to Sherlock and flicks my eyes to Irene. Thankfully the American does not notice the gesture. Unfortunately, neither does Sherlock.
"For God's sake, she's the one who knows the code ask her!" John says as the American pushes the gun closer to his head.
"Yes, sir, she also knows the code that automatically calls police and sets of the burglar alarm, I've learned not to trust this woman," the American says.
"Mr Holmes doesn't kn-," Irene starts.
"SHUT up! One more word out of you, just one, and I will decorate that wall with the insides of your head, that for me will not be a hardship" he says. I gulp.
"Mr Archer, at the count of three shoot Dr Watson," he says.
I see slight panic isn't Sherlocks eyes
"NO, PLEASE, please don't do that," I say My voice wavering
"On second thought shoot the kid," he says with a sick smile.
I feel bile rising in my throat at the thought of my brain splattered on my surroundings.
"I don't know the code," Sherlock says glancing at me.
"One," the American shouts
"I don't know the code!" Sherlock says again more panicked.
"Two," the American says
"She didn't tell me I don't know it!" Sherlock shouts.
"I'm prepared to believe you any second now," he says with another sick smile
Sherlock glances and me and then Irene with a soft look of pleading. I motion to Irene with my eyes and Irene motions down with hers.
"Three," the American says. I hear the man prepare to shoot and my breathing hitches.
"NO, stop!" Sherlock calls they all freeze and Sherlock slowly lowers his hands and turns to the vault.
He takes a few breaths and enters the code. I mouth the numbers as he enters them
"32, 24, 34"
The safe clicks indicating it had opened and I see Sherlock visibly relax.
"Thank you, Mr Holmes, open it please," the American says Sherlock turns the handle then glances back at Irene who looks away.
"Vatican cameos!" Sherlock yells. John gets down and I dive out of the way as Sherlock opens the safe. He ducks down and a gunshot coming from the safe hit the man who had been holding the gun to me. Set into action Irene elbows the man who stood by her in the groin Sherlock hits the man closest to him down with the but of the gun, he had taken from him and I tacked the man Irene had elbowed to the ground.
John checks the man who got shot and breaths out a
"He's dead,"  I drop the man who I had help in a sleeper hold and stand up.
"Thank you, you were very observant," Irene says.
"Observant?" John asks.
"I'm flattered," she adds
"Don't be, I'd be bloody dead if he couldn't take a bloody hint faster" I scoff stumbling to the door frame to use as a brace to keep myself upright as my blood pounds in my ears
"Flattered?" John asks confused.
"There will be more of them, they'll be keeping an eye on the building," Sherlock says running out of the room, John follows and I wait in the doorway.
Irene moves to the vault and peers in
"He took it with him," I say. She looks at me. I hear five gunshots and roll my eyes turning slightly to lean my back against the cool wood.

"you seem calm for someone just held at gunpoint," Irene states,

"I wouldn't say I'm calm, Just calmer than most would be in my place, You get used to this sort of thing surprisingly quick being around Sherlock," I whisper in reply pushing away from the door Stepping over the body's I pick my phone up from behind the armchair then turn to the door.

"Check the rest of the house, see how they got in," Sherlock instructs John. 
He enters and I hold up my phone.
"Should probably have mentioned I sent a text to Lestrade," I say, He shrugs.
"Well,  that's the knighthood in the bag," he says flipping the camera phone up and catching it
"Oh, and that's mine," Irene says holding a hand out for it. I walk over to look at the screen
"All the photographs are on there, I presume?" I say looking at the screen which reads 'I am ____ locked. Four spaces, I assume it will probably be a word but can't be sure,
"Well I have copies, of course," she says.
"No you don't, you'll have permanently disabled any kind of uplink or connection," Sherlock says
"unless the contents of this phone are properly unique, you wouldn't be able to sell them," he adds.
"Who said I'm selling?" Irene asks
"Well, why would they be interested?" I ask Looking down at the Americans.
"Whatever is on the phone it is clearly not just photographs," Sherlock says.
"That camera phone is my life, Mr Holmes, I'd die before I let you take it. It's my protection," Irene says holding her hand out for it
"Sherlock!" John calls out
I grab it to off my father,
"It was," I say moving past them and out to John pocketing the small device as I leave.