We stayed like that for a while, my head on his shoulder, his soft breathing filling up the air around me. I looked down on my tied-up leg, that seeming soft now that I had felt what pain it could truly elicit.

Tobirama was leaning his head on mine in a way that was unfathomable to me. I couldn't believe it; couldn't believe the connection we had created.

I looked at his hands, saw the indentations from gun practice and weight lifting. I wanted to take it. I wanted to take it so much, my entire being hurt. But I couldn't. Not because of God; I didn't think God would mind a bit of hand-holding. But because of him. And because of me. Because I knew that if he pulled away, a part of me would die, and I didn't know how big that part was.

"Now, I want you to listen carefully." Tobirama broke the silence with a purr. His voice was incredibly dark but also raspy, giving it a lot of character. "Do you have a bath tub up here?" I nodded. "Good. I'm going to carry you to it and tap up a nice, hot bath for you. Im going to place you in that bath. Then, you'll soak in it and very slowly untie the rope. Do you understand the instructions?"

The way he commanded me, softly yet firmly, made me curl up tighter to his chest. He chuckled, and he pressed his lips on the top of my head. I stiffened, not knowing whether he had actually kissed me or just placed his lips there.

When he lifted me up to spare me from the pain of walking with the rope still tied on my leg, I realised just how relaxed the rope session had made me. The pulsing adrenaline that had forced me to stay in exactly that moment had ebbed away, leaving me limp and relaxed. I closed my eyes and leaned my head against his chest, listening to the heartbeat within his rib cage, strong and steady and slow.

"This is normal", he purred as he went in search of the bathroom. "This relaxation you're feeling. It's like becoming high on your own signal substances."

I blushed by the fact that he knew what I felt and what that implied.

When he placed me down, I stood on both legs despite the pain from the bound one that was now invisible as my trousers covered in . We were caught in a stare-off while he tubbed the bath for me. It took a lifetime, but when it was done and he had turned the tap off, he didn't leave. Not leaving his gaze once, I removed my trousers and underwear, revealing my entire self to him. He didn't let go of my eyes once, not to look down on my sex, not to see just how purple my leg had become.

"Let me help you", he said and reached his hand out.

I took it, feeling how mild yet dry they were, only slightly longer as mine but thicker and coarser.

He helped me get into the tub slowly. Just when I had sat down, I saw him smile a crooked smile.

"Enjoy", he said.

Before he turned to leave, I noticed not only that he was still erect; the front of his trousers were wet of pre-cum.

I understood why Tobirama had wanted me to take a bath as soon as I relaxed in the tub.

The rope had definitely caused some marks in my skin, because when the hot water soaked underneath them, it stung. A lot.

I hissed, leaning my head back. At the same time, I noticed I was laughing. The sensation was incredible, bringing me back right to this moment once more, a place I wasn't certain I wanted to be in seeing Tobirama wasn't here. At the same time, I had no choice; the adrenaline, the pulse raise, the nerve signals from my leg straight up to my brain forced me.

I enjoyed it the way you ought to enjoy a good wine, slowly and patiently. Then, I started to slowly untie the ropes.

The ropes had swollen a bit in the warmth of the water, but not too much which meant I was still able to untie them quite easily. I didn't doubt for a second that Tobirama knew exactly what he was doing and had figured the material out; he knew I would struggle a bit but that I would manage.

I undid the rope one turn at a time until all that was left were deep, purple marks and the delicious memory of it. I leaned my head back, enjoyed my bath, Tobirama even having put some bath oil in there.

I got up, took a towel from the wooden cabinet in the tiles bathroom and dried myself.

When I came out, Tobirama wasn't there anymore.

Only half an hour after my bath, a young police officer came and introduced themself. They were the one who would be on guarding duty first.

I didn't know what I had expected. Tobirama was the chief of the police force, and he must certainly have more important things to do than follow me around. But at the same time, his rapid departure really got to me.

We had paused the services after the occurrences of the last time, but the visiting hours still occurred. I walked around to greet guests which was my duty, but at the same time, my heart was a whirlwind of things I didn't understand.

Izuna noticed, of course, sensitive as he was, my beloved little brother, so I told him. I told him everything.

He wasn't aghast, as I had thought he would be, but rather seemed politely interested.

"Him leaving so suddenly is a part of the play", he said. "A way of ascertaining dominance over you."

I frowned.

"You mean he's playing games with me?" I asked.

Izuna shook his head, sitting down on a bench at one of the altars, pulling his cardigan tighter around him; he was off duty and so was in civil clothes.

"No, not playing games. Just playing. I'm not surprised. You've got quite a dominant aura yourself. In those cases, people like him have to work extra if they want you. If they want to own you."

I kept frowning at him.

"How do you know all of this?"

He smiled up at me, stuck his tongue out.

"I'm just fascinated by it. I've read a lot."

I sat down next to him, pulled him to me, kissed the top of his head. I had never loved anything so much and never would.

But despite my sweet brother's attempt at a calming explanation, I felt my days were filled with the absence of him. Three police officers a day took turns guarding me, and always stayed close to me, although I had to say they were very skilled at being discrete with it. They even followed my when I went jogging and to the gym, making me feel like a celebrity, but at the same time, I noticed I wasn't as worried anymore. If people on the streets whispered things, I either heard or I didn't notice.

But I still thought about the police chief. All the time. Would he contact me? What if he didn't? Would I contact him? How? Should I ask one of his subordinates, one of the police officers who came to guard?

Then came the day I would hold my first mass again after the break, a Sunday mass which was the day on which everything had gone wrong last time. I tried to comfort myself by the fact that it had been weeks. And, by extension, weeks since I had seen Tobirama.

I stood in front of my mirror, frowning at my mirror image. I needed to get my hair cut, I saw, but knew I would ignore it for another half a year before Izuna finally sat me down and trimmed it with a knife. My rings glimmered on all fingers, the collar a deep purple, bringing forth the violet in the stones in my ears.

And I was worried. Very, very worried because the guarding officer had left that morning, and a new one hadn't yet arrived.

I didn't know what I should do. There was nobody I could call; the only one higher above me in hierarchy was the fucking pope. And I had gotten no number to the police force. Did I call the emergency number?

There was a knock on my door, and Izuna came in. He immediately went to hug me, and I placed a hand on the top of his head, which was on the same level as my lower chest.

"How are you feeling?" he asked.

"Worried", I answered truthfully.

"You'll be fine", he said.

"Of course I'll be fine!" I said, suddenly irritated, not with Izuna of course but with this entire situation. News every day about riots against Catholic Churches. Protests and counter protests. Police interventions. Paedophile, paedophile, paedophile... I had backed away from Izuna and was pacing. "I will be fine but what about them? My guests? People who come here to worship God with me? I thought we would be fine because of police presence, but there is no one here."

Izuna frowned.

"Really? I thought I saw... Oh, brother, this must be so hard on you."

He came to hug me, and it hurt how well he knew me; he wasn't even offended by my outburst because he knew it had nothing to do with him.

I leaned my chin against the top of his head, charged my batteries against him.

"I'm sorry", I said. "For speaking to you like that. We'll keep our eyes open."

"We will."

I had just taken my place on top of the altar to begin the mass when I saw that there actually was a police there.

The police was standing at the very back, in civil clothes; blue jeans and a black sweater, but with his gun and baton at his side tucked into his belt alongside his police badge to let people know he had the right to carry them. His arms were crossed and he was staring straight at me.

But it wasn't just any police officer. It was the chief.

It was Tobirama.